Happy 2023 - Drunk Spergery

[pursuitsnail]

That Fong-Jones will run out of people to flatter, threaten, or harass into fucking with routing or dropping service.

Maybe.

Possibly.

My deepest New Years wish is that someone recorded one of his 5am 'girl talk' phone calls and releases it.

 

[Retarded Fat Autist]

Ralph pissing off some cartel trying to get a hooker and gets turned into tacos.

 

[mindlessobserver]

Massive economic recession. My Silver Kiwi Koins are going to be the only asset I own to appreciate in value.

 

[Blaster]

Meigh will leave Ralph this year. Locking in my prediction.

 

[Napoleon Bonerfart]

Null comes out as transgender, and gofundme has a change of heart and lets her keep a page up to panhandle for transition surgery money.

 

[Urbicide]

The rise of trannie serial killers

 

[Alaric the Visigoth]

Mauler still has his force awakens review series unfinished but have a hundred more Efap episodes that are all 11 hours long.

 

[I've Seen Some More Shit]

Two terminally online activist troons are gonna get into a hilariously flappy fist fight and it's gonna become a viral sensation within hours

 

[Burd Turglar]

TND

 

[BrieLarsonFan2004]

I will get a girlfriend.

 

[IrishMcPotato]

I will win the powerball

 

[Feline Supremacist]

Biden will stroke out and Kamala will get a chance to be the most hate American President of all time

 

[Beard_Chan]

Something aliens related will be revealed to the public

 

[NyQuilninja]

Niggers will be given forms of official reparations as a lead-up to universal basic income

 

[Surprised Pikachu]

I’ll still be fat, lonely and shit-posting on here. Why change a winning formula?

 

[Are-A-Ham-A-Key]

That obtaining dental insurance to finally remove my fucking broken tooth will still be a massive hassle.

 

[faux testies]

zelensky hands out free estrogen to everyone on the front lines, troons die for ukraine.

 

[Look At You]

Chris will be let out on time served and he aggressively e-beg for money. People will not give him enough to get by and he will get caught trying to steal a Lego set at Wal-Mart.

Age will catch up to Nick Fuentes as his metabolism slows down and he will start swelling out, getting fatter and tubbier. People will point out his double chin and he will step away from streaming for a while before returning an absolute unit of a hambeast.

There will be an even more active push to destigmatize pedophilia and an attempt to turn pedophiles into a protected class. People will get rightfully angry about this, but the powers-that-be will utilize that anger to justify the need for such a change to be made.

 

[Tiger Jack]

1. Someone (probably Chaggot) gets seriously injured at Ralphamania either inside the ring or out of it, because none of these out of shape retards realize how easily they can hurt themselves. The Farms will endlessly speculate about the legal implications for Ralph.

2. Ralph and Pantsu are involved in some kind of domestic dispute.

3. Ali Jamal's parents finally start paying attention to who their autistic/retarded son is hanging around with and force him offline.

4. Ethan and Hila Kline begin a very messy and public divorce.

5. iDubbbz once again fails to reclaim his masculinity at Creator Clash 2. Anisa gets pregnant with another man's baby to punish him.

6. Contra finally drops the receipts on PhilosophyTube, revealing that he's the one that raped her.

7. The Tranch goes full Waco.

8. Somebody tries to hack the website again.

9. Biden shits his pants during a live address, prompting the most aggressive media blackout the world has ever seen.

10. SBF is given a sweetheart deal and avoids prison. Sometime later he gets shot by one of the ex-FTX customers he robbed.

 

[Pop-Tart]

1. Nick Fuentes has a sex tape or sex tape adjacent thing leak. Either his nudes or such or he is caught with someone else's etc. etc.
2. A tranny directly kills themselves in a flashy way. Self immolation, or shooting themselves in a public way, as a means of openly drawing attention and blame to KF. Like literally saying this is kf fault or some shit (assuming this has directly happened already)
3. Yaniv is charged with some form of sexual assaults.
4. Ezra Miller is arrested or kills himself (suicide by cop counts)
5. AVGN will retire after a shitshow or somethin.
6. Ralph gets involved in a domestic disturbance or commits assault.