How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[EmpireOfTheClouds]

Had kind of a rough week really. But it's almost over. Just 2 more days left to work and I plan on just doing fuck all on Sunday. Really need a mental health break.

 

[Blop]

I think my friend is trying to set me up with a nice, smart, successful, interesting, attractive guy but my autism does not allow me to believe this is the case. What do I do?

edit - the setter-upper is a friend of 20 years if that helps

 

[Coffee Druid]

I’ve been feeling rather lonely. I’ve realized I’ve only been interacting with the same 3 friends or so for the past year. Plus my partner. I do enjoy their company, even if they bug me sometimes. But I feel like I need something more. I need to find some friends that are into hobbies of mine, or maybe go to some local events. I’ve been cooped up so long I don’t know what I should do. I love my partner too, but I feel lonely. He’s been busy with work but things seem so boring. He just wakes up, works, watches YouTube and sleeps. I’d be a hypocrite to complain since I’m not accomplishing what I feel I should be tbh. It’s just something I need to take responsibility to address and figure out.

In better things, my baby chickens are stealing my heart. Most of them are still skittish and run from me (unless I have food). But one curious lass will let me pet her and hops onto my legs. I love them more than they will ever know. I’m working on converting an old dog run into a chicken run. A lot of paper mulberry trees, greenbrier and weeds to cut down. But it will be worth it in the end. I’m considering planting some clover or other cover crops but the chickens might demolish it when let loose in it.

I haven’t done it in awhile but I’ve been spending 30 minutes or so outside under the moon as part of my night time habits. At least while spring is providing good weather. The “Druid” in my name isn’t literal (was playing one in D&D when I joined the forum), but I just feel something peaceful about the outdoors. I can be alone with my thoughts and think about things more clearly. I’m agnostic, but if there’s anything close to the feeling of something “spiritual”, it’s nature. Either way I think it’s beautiful.

 

[Chan Fan]

I've had a migraine four days in a row...should I be concerned? I take rizatriptan for them and I've taken one each of the four days but this is getting worrisome. I've never had this happen before. I usually have ~10 migraines per month and my doctor knows but the preventative medicine she gave me for it had very uncomfortable side effects so I couldnt't take them (I tried more than one and they all did the same thing.)

Edit - looks like it's a side effect of something else I'm taking but I only have to take it a few more days so I'm gonna try to tough it out

 

[Kill a Troon for Pikamee]

Cops got me yesterday and I have another lawsuit against me little do they know I've got a very pro-lawyer friend, these cop faggots gonna be paying me for moral damages lmao LETS GOOOOOOOOOO

 

[Mrs Paul]

I just found out my cat Maggie has a tumor on her tongue, and there's really nothing that can be done -- it's just a matter of time. It's going to keep growing, and all we can really do for now is keep her comfortable. She's almost 17, so it's not like this kind of thing is unexpected, but fuck, this kind of thing is so never easy.

It also doesn't help that I haven't been able to sleep for the last couple nights for some unknown reason.

 

[The Last Stand]

I just found out my cat Maggie has a tumor on her tongue, and there's really nothing that can be done -- it's just a matter of time. It's going to keep growing, and all we can really do for now is keep her comfortable. She's almost 17, so it's not like this kind of thing is unexpected, but fuck, this kind of thing is so never easy.

It also doesn't help that I haven't been able to sleep for the last couple nights for some unknown reason.

Poor thing.

 

[A Grey Cat]

I was minding my own bussiness when a part of my tooth broke off! Not the whole tooth just the crown tip of my fifth upper right one molar. But I honestly don't know why. My teeth felt fine didn't hurt or nothing and even the chipped part doesn't hurt like at all was almost no blood when it broke. I think it may be because I grind my teeth in my sleep and/or put too much pressure on my jaws sleeping face down at night.

Well I've done all I can do there's no dentists avalible till Monday morning and even then idk if they can help me much

 

[Philly Phunk Machine]

I took Sunday off this week to have Easter with the family but my parents have been beefing for the last several weeks; they've been seeing a therapist via Zoom to work on their relationship troubles and it's seemingly worsened things to the point where Dad is now living in a hotel room. Dad also had surgery for prostate cancer earlier this year which put a strain on everyone before the therapist entered the mix.

This is the closest I've ever seen their relationship venture into divorce territory since 2009. I don't think they'll actually go through with a divorce seeing as how they're in their 60s and neither of them have any good alternatives, but it's certainly disturbing and I'm pissed that I took off to come home to half a family. The worst part about it is they're the typical boomer couple that will never come to any sort of compromise because the husband is convinced the wife is too OCD and demanding whereas the wife thinks the husband is just lazy and undisciplined. It's been the dynamic for 20+ years and they're never gonna change for the other because they think they're in the right.

I'm not too broken up about it seeing as how I'm grown doing my own things but it has reminded me that my family has a shelf life and I need to get some other people in my life before they disappear for good.

 

[Not a local]

I feel like I'm in a constant loop of pure joy and agony. I've had that aching lonely feeling crop back up again. I have someone I can turn to, but somehow it just doesn't seem to help. I'm not nearly as bad as I used to be, and I'll recover, but damn does it feel bad in the moment.
On a lighter note I can at least comfort any kiwis going through the same shit. You're not alone.

 

[M3xus]

Did something to my neck while gardening and I think I'll have to call off work, because everything is pain when I try to move. Hate leaving people high and dry like this, but my job has a lot of manual work I don't think I'll be able to do today.

 

[Jason Wynn]

Ate a fair amount of turkey, smoked some weed, took a couple of melatonin pills

why the fuck is it ten after two in the morning and I’m still wide awake? I should be out like a fucking light

 

[Overcast]

Just trying to accept that I don't have complete control over my life and letting old habits go. It's a weird feeling. It makes me sad, but it also feels kinda freeing.

 

[JimiHendrix]

feels like theres a timer ticking down and everything i do only adds seconds onto it. but it isn't enough.

 

[Drihten]

Had to have one of my cats put down a couple of days ago, it's saddening and it feels quite lonely without her. Overall though? I'm okay, as I said, just dealing with the loss of a pet, everything else is going fine.

 

[YachieKicchou]

I have a friend I had online who died. I was the last one he talked to. I had him on steam and he went offline when he died and the extremely morbid thing is that now it’s a counter for how long he’s been dead. I was just checking my steam and saw he’s been offline for 172 days.

He was always known for morbid jokes so at first I thought when his brother logged into his discord account to tell me he was fucking with me. I kept waiting for him to log in on steam and go “haha just kidding”.

Seeing that it’s been exactly 172 days hit me like a bag of rocks and on some weird level I’m still waiting for him to log back on. He died in such an awful way that part of me still holds onto the idea that it’s an insanely elaborate prank and he’s still out there. It doesn’t matter that my name is engraved on his box of ashes or that I verified his death certificate is real. Part of me just genuinely believes he still might be out there. I guess accepting death can just be really hard like that.

 

[Flavius Claudius Julianus]

I have a friend I had online who died. I was the last one he talked to. I had him on steam and he went offline when he died and the extremely morbid thing is that now it’s a counter for how long he’s been dead. I was just checking my steam and saw he’s been offline for 172 days.

He was always known for morbid jokes so at first I thought when his brother logged into his discord account to tell me he was fucking with me. I kept waiting for him to log in on steam and go “haha just kidding”.

Seeing that it’s been exactly 172 days hit me like a bag of rocks and on some weird level I’m still waiting for him to log back on. He died in such an awful way that part of me still holds onto the idea that it’s an insanely elaborate prank and he’s still out there. It doesn’t matter that my name is engraved on his box of ashes or that I verified his death certificate is real. Part of me just genuinely believes he still might be out there. I guess accepting death can just be really hard like that.

You just reminded me of a friend of mine. Back when Habbo Hotel was a thing (is it still going?) we were all like 13/14 in our friend group. Buddy of mine, typical socially awkward, nerdy type with little female experience, gets to know an alt-girl online. He adds her to MSN and whatever, they talk for months and months. Long story short, she commits suicide after announcing it to both my friend and several others.

That shit fucked my friend up for well over ten years. On many levels, he's probably never gotten over it.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

Honestly, this was a good start to a good week for me. I’ve been learning more about game emulation and how torrents actually work from the developer’s perspective, and plus due to my part-time job, it’s pretty nice to have some good time on my hands to try some of this stuff out.

So far, this could be a great week.

 

[Zebedee]

Dad died a couple weeks ago, due to COVID I wasn’t able to travel and say my farewell in person, I’ve dropped into a pretty deep pit after that. He left behind his old stamp collection for me, since we used to collect them together.

Also fell back into my benzo problem for the most part, though not as bad as it used to be. Used to love diazepam (Valium) and lorazepam (Ativan) a little too much for too long.

Old habits die hard I guess.

 

[A Grey Cat]

Have off work tommow to get my tooth looked at. Hopefully they can save it, hopefully my insurance can cover some of the treatment, and hopefully it there's a copay left to pay it won't bleed my wallet dry.