- Joined
- Mar 11, 2025
Got stung by a wasp earlier today, the spot where it stung me is still swollen and hurts really badly.
How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check
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- Joined
- Nov 29, 2021
I had a catastrophic tooth failure an hour ago that has exposed the entire inside of my molar. It's a Saturday night and the eve of my wedding anniversary. My husband has gone in search of tooth wax and my fondest desire for a present is now a tooth crown.
I am sad.
I am sad.
- Joined
- Feb 17, 2024
Parents came to visit yesterday and I got a text from my dad afterwards saying he loved me and was proud of me. I dont usually say it but I told my dad I loved him too and would like to have him come back in the future.
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2024
This cut is going ass. I can’t stop eating over my amount. Not to the effect that I gain weight, just maintain. I think I might aim lower and get the whole shoot for the moon and land among the stars effect.
My resting weight is 195 instead of 200 though so I guess it’s working but I’ve hovered at 195 for a bit.
My resting weight is 195 instead of 200 though so I guess it’s working but I’ve hovered at 195 for a bit.
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- Joined
- Jul 30, 2019
We picked up a Great Pyrenees puppy this weekend, and she's absolutely perfect! She's quite possibly the calmest, smartest puppy I've ever met. She's already half house broken and knows commands like "sit" and "leave it". Even crate training has worked out well so far, and she slept through the night without crying or having any accidents. I can't wait for this bundle of floof to grow up into a giant cuddle bug.
Puppy tax:
Puppy tax:
- Joined
- Jul 6, 2024
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2022
Getting gray hair over computer problems. Might have to invest in a new network adapter.
Also it's raining and it's nice.
Also it's raining and it's nice.
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2019
If she does, she isn't showing it. She didn't cry at all last night, and she's made herself at home right off the bat. She's already doing Great Pyrenees things like patrolling the perimeter of the living room and doing guard duty by the front door.
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2015
Congrats to getting yourself a puppy.
The puppy period is the best time and the worst time.
The puppy period is the best time and the worst time.
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2019
Apparently with this breed, they're extra difficult as teenagers, but once they hit that 12 - 18 month mark, something in their brain clicks and they're less retarded. So far she's been much better behaved than my parents dogs, so I'm gonna enjoy the adorable floof stage for as long as possible.
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2023
I'm in that kind of zoned-out transitionary stage that I've found myself in a lot as of late. Kind of half-there, doing so much work that I'm unable to really sense stuff, just thinking about the future and various concerns for it.
TL;DR: had a friend for like two weeks for the first time in nearly a decade. Felt like getting a defibrillator to the chest while under cardiac arrest and now that he's gone it all feels like some surreal dream that didn't really happen. Made me acutely aware of a big dumb hole that I know's been there for a while but never really bothered me before. Also made me aware that I feel like I'm surrounded by strangers from Mars, and made me yearn for some connection with Earthlings.
It'll pass eventually, I think. There's nothing I can really do about this given my current state, and it'll be at least a few more weeks until I have enough time to even contemplate a plan for what to do. For now I just have to keep my nose to the grindstone and keep at it.
I had a guy over a month or so ago, for two weeks. He wasn't sleeping with me or anything, he was at a hotel in a nearby town and we just met up to hang out for large portions of the day for that entire timespan. I basically went from total isolation for years to what felt like a 7-5 job that was nothing but social interaction, all the time, every day, for the only break I'd had in nearly a year by then.
I am an extreme introvert. If you couldn't already tell from the "total isolation" bit, I really do not like in-person interaction with people and even half an hour with someone I enjoy will tire me out to the point of needing half a day's rest to recover. I used to like people way more, but I've always become this tired from social interaction and eventually I decided to just save myself the trouble and stop seeing people so often entirely. That turned out to be pretty good timing, given COVID's attack a few years later driving everyone completely mad.
I was already on the verge of exhaustive collapse when this guy came over, and I figured that once he was over I'd completely fall apart. I wasn't entirely wrong: the first week was full of days that just got cut short because I would be physically unable to continue, and no matter the situation I would just shut down or start falling asleep.
The second week, however, I started powering through enough to actually get through the day. I was actually enjoying myself. I felt a kind of wholeness that I can't remember feeling past, what, age 10? 9? Since I was last in situations where I'd be meeting people on the daily and forced to make friends.
And then he left, and now I'm back to the same way I was feeling before. In some sort of suspended motion, too tired to do much at all, grinding through (currently) 10-hour days of self-imposed work 7 days a week as set-up for some promised future that I have an intense nagging suspicion will never come to fruition.
I didn't like the guy romantically. He didn't like me that way either. This was a strictly platonic affair, and it's left me longing for a world where shit like that can just... happen, every day, if you put your mind to it.
A world where you can walk outside, see public spaces bustling with people you've got a lot in common with, and shoot your shot with some random guy you didn't know a year ago. Where you can organize something and have people show up to it, genuinely interested in whatever the fuck you put together and willing to put their minds to work making it happen, instead of having half the people bail last-minute (without notice) and the remaining half who showed up pay almost no attention to your fruitless efforts. Where you can learn new things just by talking to people and taking initiative.
I don't think this is that world, even if I'm now willing to put in the effort to try and make it one. I don't really think that kind of world ever existed. But I feel like there used to be something much closer to this, didn't there? I keep seeing bits of it scattered about in how old people talk and behave, and how even older (now passed) people recorded their lives in the past. I swear I even have memories of this kind of shit when I was a child, but that's probably just due to people being unlikely to deny entertaining weird loud kids who bug them with questions about dromedaries and cool jets.
I think I'm just tired of the entire world looking alien to me. I doubt it would have looked much more familiar to me in any other time period, but I can't help but feel that I would have been able to at least understand the differences of those times much more easily than I can today's. Even the internet, my one consistent source of human interaction for ages now and easily the most familiar place to me in the world at the moment, feels completely alien and more different (for the worse) with each passing year. Feels like I'm losing what few roots I had in the first place, and now I'm just some floating sapling lost in a really loud river.
What I'm saying is: I feel like an old lady in my 20s, lmao. Maybe I should start crocheting and making cookies or something and just embrace it.
I am an extreme introvert. If you couldn't already tell from the "total isolation" bit, I really do not like in-person interaction with people and even half an hour with someone I enjoy will tire me out to the point of needing half a day's rest to recover. I used to like people way more, but I've always become this tired from social interaction and eventually I decided to just save myself the trouble and stop seeing people so often entirely. That turned out to be pretty good timing, given COVID's attack a few years later driving everyone completely mad.
I was already on the verge of exhaustive collapse when this guy came over, and I figured that once he was over I'd completely fall apart. I wasn't entirely wrong: the first week was full of days that just got cut short because I would be physically unable to continue, and no matter the situation I would just shut down or start falling asleep.
The second week, however, I started powering through enough to actually get through the day. I was actually enjoying myself. I felt a kind of wholeness that I can't remember feeling past, what, age 10? 9? Since I was last in situations where I'd be meeting people on the daily and forced to make friends.
And then he left, and now I'm back to the same way I was feeling before. In some sort of suspended motion, too tired to do much at all, grinding through (currently) 10-hour days of self-imposed work 7 days a week as set-up for some promised future that I have an intense nagging suspicion will never come to fruition.
I didn't like the guy romantically. He didn't like me that way either. This was a strictly platonic affair, and it's left me longing for a world where shit like that can just... happen, every day, if you put your mind to it.
A world where you can walk outside, see public spaces bustling with people you've got a lot in common with, and shoot your shot with some random guy you didn't know a year ago. Where you can organize something and have people show up to it, genuinely interested in whatever the fuck you put together and willing to put their minds to work making it happen, instead of having half the people bail last-minute (without notice) and the remaining half who showed up pay almost no attention to your fruitless efforts. Where you can learn new things just by talking to people and taking initiative.
I don't think this is that world, even if I'm now willing to put in the effort to try and make it one. I don't really think that kind of world ever existed. But I feel like there used to be something much closer to this, didn't there? I keep seeing bits of it scattered about in how old people talk and behave, and how even older (now passed) people recorded their lives in the past. I swear I even have memories of this kind of shit when I was a child, but that's probably just due to people being unlikely to deny entertaining weird loud kids who bug them with questions about dromedaries and cool jets.
I think I'm just tired of the entire world looking alien to me. I doubt it would have looked much more familiar to me in any other time period, but I can't help but feel that I would have been able to at least understand the differences of those times much more easily than I can today's. Even the internet, my one consistent source of human interaction for ages now and easily the most familiar place to me in the world at the moment, feels completely alien and more different (for the worse) with each passing year. Feels like I'm losing what few roots I had in the first place, and now I'm just some floating sapling lost in a really loud river.
What I'm saying is: I feel like an old lady in my 20s, lmao. Maybe I should start crocheting and making cookies or something and just embrace it.
TL;DR: had a friend for like two weeks for the first time in nearly a decade. Felt like getting a defibrillator to the chest while under cardiac arrest and now that he's gone it all feels like some surreal dream that didn't really happen. Made me acutely aware of a big dumb hole that I know's been there for a while but never really bothered me before. Also made me aware that I feel like I'm surrounded by strangers from Mars, and made me yearn for some connection with Earthlings.
It'll pass eventually, I think. There's nothing I can really do about this given my current state, and it'll be at least a few more weeks until I have enough time to even contemplate a plan for what to do. For now I just have to keep my nose to the grindstone and keep at it.
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2021
Congratulations, she is adorable. I just hope you don't have a daughter named Nina. (Sorry.)
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2024
So a few days ago I quit my job. The Account managers treat it like its a joke to be fore coming with you all. We had more fights in trucks in any job I had and they only gave us warnings or suspensions they didn't fire anyone from my knowledge. If we get injured or are bleeding to death we have to call them first instead of calling 911. Then if we rest on the shade of a tree we will have to go home because we are not being productive enough. They let a dude ride a truck who can't even ride himself into work, he already got the truck stuck 4 different times already. At one point they cut Thursday hours in half because they have to let the green cards in. The Account managers let themselves get cussed out without disciplining their employees.
They let in people with clean background checks in but hire people who are on parole, from a halfway home drug center, and straight up sex offenders. If I were to know this before coming to work there I would've gave up a long time ago. The only reason why I stayed is because they offer night watch for Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I had to watch a mall for 12 hours from 6 pm - 6 am in a FNAF style every hour though I had to walk around. I had to do this because the fire alarms were faulty and I had to make sure nothing catch on fire. They took that away when they got new fire alarms and my account manager seemed more happy that he doesn't have to worry about that property anymore. He keep calling me buddy like if I am some fucking Yes man.
Thats just how I felt working there, I am glad I don't have to work there.
They let in people with clean background checks in but hire people who are on parole, from a halfway home drug center, and straight up sex offenders. If I were to know this before coming to work there I would've gave up a long time ago. The only reason why I stayed is because they offer night watch for Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I had to watch a mall for 12 hours from 6 pm - 6 am in a FNAF style every hour though I had to walk around. I had to do this because the fire alarms were faulty and I had to make sure nothing catch on fire. They took that away when they got new fire alarms and my account manager seemed more happy that he doesn't have to worry about that property anymore. He keep calling me buddy like if I am some fucking Yes man.
Thats just how I felt working there, I am glad I don't have to work there.
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2021
I am actually having one of those "apply whipped cream directly to back of throat" days. Fortunately whipped cream was BOGO at the grocery store today.
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2021
I now have a half of a tooth, half of a root canal (wtf, never heard of a 2 stage root canal), some antibiotics and a small amount of painkillers. I'm leaving on Tuesday to travel for 2 weeks and will return for root canal pt 2 and crown part 1 after I get back. I'm hoping the half of a job holds up that long and I'm not seeking another emergency dental visit away from home.
My regular dentist doesn't do any after hours work so I had to go to the only walk in/full scale dental clinic in the area. Tomorrow being the holiday I doubt even that place is open. Also seems like sol without ability to pay - would have had to get it pulled on the cheap.
I ate a couple of mini doughnuts and now I feel bloated which serves me right.
Not sad now.
My regular dentist doesn't do any after hours work so I had to go to the only walk in/full scale dental clinic in the area. Tomorrow being the holiday I doubt even that place is open. Also seems like sol without ability to pay - would have had to get it pulled on the cheap.
I ate a couple of mini doughnuts and now I feel bloated which serves me right.
Not sad now.
SynthwaveDeux
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2022
My dear friend is really struggling in life: Problems with her kids, relationship problems, mental health problems, health problems, financial problems.. I love her to bits but man is this situation sucking the life out of me. Trying to be there for her but getting nothing in return and sometimes attitude makes me want to crawl under a rock and pretend I am dead. I’d love to know how to support a friend without getting emotional damage in the process.
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2021
Sounds very tough. You need to put yourself first and help when you have the mettle to deal with it. You aren't her case worker, lover, family or parent.
By all means help a friend - but you need to set boundaries with what you are willing to help with and if you are getting attitude it could be a signal you are getting too involved or they don't want to help themselves.
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SynthwaveDeux
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2022
Thank you for the kind words.Sounds very tough. You need to put yourself first and help when you have the mettle to deal with it. You aren't her case worker, lover, family or parent.
By all means help a friend - but you need to set boundaries with what you are willing to help with and if you are getting attitude it could be a signal you are getting too involved or they don't want to help themselves.
It’s just confusing when she asks if I can come over and she clearly wants to talk but she is not receptive to anything, it is kind of like a monolog instead of a conversation. She told me she feels so bad at the moment that she needs to get shitfaced and I gently said that it will only make her feel worse. The reply was something along the lines of ”nobody can tell me what to do and I’ll get blasted, end of discussion”. What can you say at that point? I thought I’d make next week a week just for myself cause the constant drama is starting to make me grumpy and it ain’t worth it. The worst part is that I always make time for her but when she is busy with whatever, I am never the priority. Anyway I sound like a total loser, thank you to anybody who reads this.
JustStopDude
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 7, 2017
Utah is pretty. I'm really out of practice with finding apartments. I didn't realize it's a thing now where you got to spend $50 just to put in a fucking application.
Granted, it's the weekend, but it seems pretty easy to get around this town. The whole Western US grid thing is nice. I'm not sure how bad traffic is during the work week. I guess I find out this Tuesday for the first day of work.
Im not feeling in a panic anymore, which is the first time I can say that in about a month since I got fired.
Granted, it's the weekend, but it seems pretty easy to get around this town. The whole Western US grid thing is nice. I'm not sure how bad traffic is during the work week. I guess I find out this Tuesday for the first day of work.
Im not feeling in a panic anymore, which is the first time I can say that in about a month since I got fired.