How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

[CowPox]

There's lots of people stuck in low end jobs, or who have bad health, or horrified at the government funding trannies and pedophiles. I'm not one of them.

I'm just alone.

Sounds like a simple problem to fix.

 

[Magnum Magazine]

Man I envy you. I work 60 to 70 hours a week, 3rd shift. I want first but hate the politics and management. The money is too good to leave at the moment. Wayyy too good. Get paid to play on my phone all night. Can't do that on first shift.

If you're on night shift, definitely make sure you're taking Vitamin D3+K2 if you aren't already. Night shift for a few years really started to ruin my health, wish I'd taken it sooner.

To be able to wake up in the morning instead of going to bed when everyone is waking up.

I know that feeling, brother. The shift has its very high benefits and its very low weaknesses.

 

[Sniperwoof]

Might be promoted two times in two years which fucking rocks.

Let's go baby!

 

[Overwritten Tapes]

If you're on night shift, definitely make sure you're taking Vitamin D3+K2 if you aren't already. Night shift for a few years really started to ruin my health, wish I'd taken it sooner.


I know that feeling, brother. The shift has its very high benefits and its very low weaknesses.

I take plenty of supplements, I also sometimes dose phenibut and/or tianeptine.

My main thing is eating right. I feed two colonies of alley cats, try to work out, and side hustle fixing people's cars while trying to buy and sell a niche market of 90s imports like Hondas and DSMs. I barely have time to cook decent food and rely on quick stuff even home made.

It's fucking taxing as hell. When I do finally go party and hang out with drunk women, instead of spitting game, I'm thinking of money and shit instead of just banging some of them.

The obsession to leave poordom is taking toll.

 

[dick brain]

I know it sounds retarded, but I’m in a spot where I’m just kinda tired of what I do and wanna join the military.

I can put up with a lot of shit and bureaucracy for a paycheck, and I’m kinda checked out on life (not depressed, but I just want some change). Only problem is, my partner has stated in the past they’d leave if I joined, and I don’t want that.

School isn’t right for me, and I’m getting closer to the cutoff age. I’m old enough to where I need to just pick a direction and start moving that way, even if it turns out to be the wrong one. Anyone else ever feel this way? All Ive ever wanted is to help people, and this feels like a stepping stone towards that…

Assuming you're American: do not sign up to kill brownos for Israeli+corpo interest, you will spend the rest of your life either regretting it or doing mental gymnastics to justify it to the point that it becomes your entire identity. I have seen it happen many times.

If you want to test yourself, experience valor + brotherhood and do something that matters, become a fireman.

 

[AnOminous]

perineal

You mean perennial, unless you really do mean that the well is between your scrotum and your anus, which is what perineal means.

 

[Johann Gambolputty...]

It is so surreal to be 34 (lol) years old and for the first time, THE FIRST TIME, being the one going around the house, closing windows, turning off lights, unplugging things cause shit, man, I have to pay for all that. Well, a quarter of it but still, we can all pay less.

Then I attacked the kitchen with a scrubber, a roll of paper towels and a bottle of Spic & Span just because I found being the only one who uses more of the kitchen than the microwave, coffee machine, sink, and occasionally the oven enough of a reason to do so.

Now I'm going through my subscriptions and budgeting the fuck out of them. This weed is hitting me weird. It's supposed to be a heavy downer but I'm still not done with the things I had to do today and I'm thinking they're going to be done.

 

[JustSomeDong]

It is so surreal to be 34 (lol) years old and for the first time, THE FIRST TIME, being the one going around the house, closing windows, turning off lights, unplugging things cause shit, man, I have to pay for all that. Well, a quarter of it but still, we can all pay less.

Then I attacked the kitchen with a scrubber, a roll of paper towels and a bottle of Spic & Span just because I found being the only one who uses more of the kitchen than the microwave, coffee machine, sink, and occasionally the oven enough of a reason to do so.

Now I'm going through my subscriptions and budgeting the fuck out of them. This weed is hitting me weird. It's supposed to be a heavy downer but I'm still not done with the things I had to do today and I'm thinking they're going to be done.

The older I get, the more peace I find in smoking a cone, putting on some music or maybe some comedy, and cleaning my house or doing yard work. This shit is mine, and I enjoy maintaining it.

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

You mean perennial, unless you really do mean that the well is between your scrotum and your anus, which is what perineal means.

Yes I do sorry auto correct issues, my fault Sir!

 

[bliblblblbbllb]

I was hit by a car and couldn't go to work. I repeatedly called everyone else scheduled for that day and no one picked because EVERY ONE of them was knocked out on their sedative medications. Seriously. EVERYONE had the same excuse of "I take strong drugs, I wuz knocked out" for why they couldn't come in early.


Everyone has been fucked and begging me to come back, so I'm going back even though I'm still sore as fuck but I'll admit: I'm pretty close to quitting. This is BULLSHIT.

Spoiler: Bliblbl discovers he is the ultimate racist

I was fine when we were severely understaffed, when I worked 80hrs a week! But hiring actual retards who are all one another's friends, play grab ass all day, and need babysitters? And mangement who treats me like shit? Somehow I'm doing even more work than before! I would actually rather work with just one competent coworker than five retarded black zoomers who blast ghetto rap and take literally five times longer than me to wash the damn dishes because they literally take breaks to watch TikToks if I'm not in the room.

They all think I'm so OLD and "just don't get it" and I'm like... guys we were all in highschool at the same time! You're just immature!

My manager legitamately has a thing for hiring actually retarded black zoomers because he had an actually retarded black child who died at 18, that he talks about in a weird pathological way on the daily. So I can't criticize them in any way, because "omgosh they're good young men." Dude they're the laziest fucks I've met. But of course they think it's mega racism if I even say something like "You need to get off your phone and do some work."

And they're all so fat, and lazy, and it just drives me off the wall- I just want to be around people who can spell the word "chicken", is this too much to ask? Is that really racism? Most annoyingly, they don't like any of the food literally because "y'all don't use any seasoning here...." They refuse to even taste it. And they think dishes like pot pie and foods like honey ham are bizarre and make disgusted faces at the food- in front of the guests.

 

[DavidS877]

Which is amusingly how/what I'm doing this weekend. The projector for my TV watching is ceiling mounted with a conduit from there to where the receiver/PC/etc is. But that run is about 10 feet too long due to needing to go down a different wall and then back up from the crawl space since there was blocking in the wall I wanted to use. But now I'm doing drywall repair in the adjacent bedroom, so I can cut a hole in the wall and drill the blocking and pull the conduit back and re-run it a shorter way. No it's not an exterior wall and the blocking isn't structural... and with a 2x4 there will be nearly 1/2" of wood left anyway. So, this weekend when I get tired of drywall I can cut some more holes in the walls, and then patch them once I drag the conduit through them.

So, I got started.

Spoiler: rant

Luckily the other day I decided I'd cut the drywall off the whole stud bay instead of trying to cut small holes and work through them. This turned out to be a good idea, as there wasn't the one block I knew about, but 4.

Also, one of the existing conduits missed by a bit and stuck out too far, so I've got to cut stuff out and push it further in the wall. As I recall it's right against a floor joist underneath.
The short one is the one that's being moved to come in from the top. The panel on the other side is the livingroom PC/Receiver/PS5/etc networking.

I was planning to do the big underhouse crawl tomorrow, and run new wires for 2 new heaters at the same time, removing a couple baseboards on old fabric romex. But it turns out I don't have any 12/2 Romex left. And the only source in the county wants $65 for 50feet. So ordered from the big orange store for delivery Tuesday $100 for 250 feet. Sure I only need 50ft or less, but it's the principle.
Tomorrow will be spent above ground continuing drywall instead.

Please don't dox me by reading the serial number on my conduit.

 

[CastrationFrustration]

My head feels like it's going to explode. I didn't have time to pick up the new meds from the pharmacy. My usual meds aren't doing jack. I'm trying to up my caffeine intake but if the pain gets any worse, I'll have to knock myself out with the backup meds. Kind of scared to try the new meds because I have a ridiculously long history of medications I'm on interacting poorly with each other and doctors not giving a shit. But the pain in my head makes me borderline useless when it hits its peak.

Otherwise, not feeling as depressed today, just annoyed as shit at my job's HR being fucking retarded about transferring me to my new facility in a timely fashion. What the hell do they pay these people for if none of my emails or in person contact are getting me anywhere?

 

[A Crying Goblin]

The older I get, the more peace I find in smoking a cone, putting on some music or maybe some comedy, and cleaning my house or doing yard work. This shit is mine, and I enjoy maintaining it.

I'm a young person and it does sound really nice. It's the life I look forward to one day. I'm not asking for anything big or crazy

 

[JustSomeDong]

I'm a young person and it does sound really nice. It's the life I look forward to one day. I'm not asking for anything big or crazy

It aint easy to get there, but once you do get there, its pretty comfy. It took a lot of sacrifice when I was younger to make it. Best advice I can give anyone to help make it possible, dont buy anything more than $100 unless you can afford to pay for it twice up front and can still pay your bills. Its not fucking easy. But I paid cash for my house, I paid cash for my vehicles and toys, and I pay cash for my smoke. Because I had the patience to wait until I could buy it twice. Your gonna end up paying that much anyways with interest and loans, so just be disciplined and stack them bills, so you can bank the difference in the end.

 

[(((I am NOT a jew)))]

I really hate myself.
My roommate is making life hell for me. I have no car and no place to go so if he kicks me out or if I just decide to leave, I'm fucked.
The only person I can go to right now for "help" is a narcissist from my past who will use this chance as a way to abuse me more.
I can't rely on my parents.
I don't know if I'll be able to save up enough for my move out of state soon.
It's been about five years to the day since I really came close to ending my life. Right now I'm both proud of myself and second-guessing if I shouldn't have tried something around New Year's Day, which is when it would have been.
I wish I could just rely on someone in this world. I wish my level of money didn't dictate every aspect of my existence.
I get these moments of happiness, but it all is bombarded by the fact that I have to know every second my life that the people who make life miserable for others can just cruise by in life with no real consequences and the people who try the hardest will be fucked over every chance.
I hate the fact that I had a moment of weakness and reached out to the very people who treated me like shit in the past because I know there's almost no one around me right now.
I wish I could just handle these things by myself, but sometimes I feel like I'm a really bad Safty Brothers movie where everything is just overly stressful and there's never really any relief.

I'd love to have faith in the future but most of the time it really seems like something I'm just clinging to it to justify not killing myself.
"Don't worry, this dirtpoor guy with almost no friends will make a movie someday."
It's all just one big joke.
People say if you're alive it must be for a reason, but we know that's bullshit. So many great people go too early and the scum of the earth thrive anymore. If I could make it to where some great guy with a family who was beloved by his community that passed too soon and take his outcome and make it happen to me, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Life should at least be going to the people who want it and fight for it and make use of it, not some suicidal asshole that almost nobody would miss anyways.

Wait a a depressed rant from that I'm not a jew guy?! That never happens.
I'm just at a kind of really low moment right now.

 

[Ravier Xavenblood]

There seems to be a law in my life that says that the only girls I can hit it off with have to live hours away from me. Shouldn't complain too much since it's in driving distance but why does life have to be so complicated and inconvenient? Guess I should've moved to the suburbs of a larger city a few years ago.

Gotta make this work. It's been going strong for over a year.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

I wish I could just rely on someone in this world.

I know that feeling. And I also know that what I'm going to say isn't going to hit with you right now - but maybe it will tomorrow, or the next day.

You have it within you to take care of yourself. Yes, at times, that feels like a sad thing, and it feels really bleak to contemplate when you just want someone to rescue you or take of you or even just care about you especially in a helpful way.

But if you let go of wanting that and reconcile with yourself, it will be OK. And if you can start pushing yourself forward, and see any traction at all (which might take awhile), the things you're currently missing so acutely will recede in importance. I don't mean "just get hard and bitter" - I mean the opposite of that. I mean that if you can detach from those painful wants and start living without resentment or yearning, you'll be freer and have the mental bandwidth to optimize your situation, whatever it is. You'll be able to set and move towards goals better when you let go of the wishing and wanting. ...I'm not saying you're doing anything bad or wrong by having moments of despair. That is very, very human and natural. But detaching from things you feel you most want - even if they seem essential or desperately needed - is a step toward actually developing greater capability to handle the stress and strain of dealing with life, even when life feels horrible.

This is essentially a Buddhist concept, and it can be deeply changing. Buddhist thought says, "all life is suffering.". That is the first of the Four Noble Truths. But the context of that is the Second Noble Truth, which is that desire (wanting) is the source of suffering. The Third Noble Truth is that cessation of suffering comes with cessation of wanting. (The Fourth is the specific Buddhist steps (the eight fold path) to enlightenment.). The eightfold path (the "how" of getting to enlightenment) may or may not be the path for everyone, but the first three Noble Truths truly do describe the experience/ cause of this kind of pain. And to be clear, cessation of the suffering-causing desire doesn't mean giving up or numbing out. It's the opposite, really. And the point is not that you're bad or at fault for being unsettled and upset. The point is that detaching yourself from that wishing and wanting and can free you to improve and shape your life, even before external conditions improve. ...which sounds like bullshit when you really, truly need a hand, but it is really, really not. Detachment gives energy, clarity, and creativity - which might mean ingenuity in how you solve problems...or even just greater peace day-to-day, which eventually gives room for harder, more focused efforts for goals and stability.

The only person I can go to right now for "help" is a narcissist from my past who will use this chance as a way to abuse me more.

Don't do it. But if you do, do your thinking ahead of time. Whatever the situation, internally you need to be all business - set your goal and do what you must to get it. Seriously steel yourself against the narc efforts (and your own past susceptibility). And if you aren't sure you can go to them without some sort of mental or emotional harm, they delay that as long as possible.

(And btw, if you do steel up enough to go to them without feeling bad or meek or in a victim position, you can say whatever you need to to get what you want. If you can get truly emotionally divested, then go for it. I am typically very transparent, straightforward, and forthcoming, but if dealing with damaging narc who has caused you harm, I am absolutely, guiltlessly for (pro-) bloodless manipulation mercenary tactics maximizing opportunities for getting what you need and calculating your conversation. But if you aren't able to game it, I would think hard before going to that person. ...the funny thing with narcissists, though, is that once you've figured them out and keep that knowing hat on, you can plan and figure out how to get what you need without sacrificing yourself. And when you see yourself do it, it feels ridiculously great and empowering. ...but you can't go in without a clear goal and a playbook.

that I have to know every second my life that the people who make life miserable for others can just cruise by in life with no real consequences and the people who try the hardest will be fucked over every chance.

This is stuff to let go, to the extent that it distracts or interferes with your life or any piece of it. (And ideally, whether it does or doesn't)

Many shitty people succeed. Sure, it's not right and not fair. But even when their success has had negative consequences for you in the past, you will go farther faster when you detach from all of the feelings around it. It might feel like letting it go is another win for them...but it's really lifting a big burden off your own shoulders.

Spend some time, if you have it, on understanding what detachment is and on practicing it/processing the feelings out. And then you can develop an approach - to life, to them, to whatever - that is rational and focused and that you can put all your energy into.

 

[Flavius Claudius Julianus]

I broke my resolution of only drinking on Saturday, but fuck it. I work hard, I deserve it.

In other news, much like last year, everyone in my office has been sick multiple times over the past few months. Last year, I held out until February until I got fucking COVID, which knocked me on my ass for 6 weeks. Hoping there's no repeat of last year.

In other news, I bought my fiancée a late engagement ring before we soon get married. She has no idea I've bought it, or even had plans of doing so. I waited until the right time before something good came up, and it did.

Excited for the future.

 

[WTBOnlineFather]

I'm bored as fuck man. I have no idea what to do with my life when I'm not working. Videogames, youtube and other goyslop aren't fun. I'd go out but I don't know where and what for, and it's far too cold to just go for a random walk. No particular activity seems appealing, everything costs way too much money or just feels like I could take it or leave it. My friends are all busy or out of town and I hate dealing with this shit alone.
Is this depression or what? How do I find something fun to do when nothing is?

 

[Doctor John B. Zyklon]

I'm bored as fuck man. I have no idea what to do with my life when I'm not working. Videogames, youtube and other goyslop aren't fun. I'd go out but I don't know where and what for, and it's far too cold to just go for a random walk. No particular activity seems appealing, everything costs way too much money or just feels like I could take it or leave it. My friends are all busy or out of town and I hate dealing with this shit alone.
Is this depression or what? How do I find something fun to do when nothing is?

Going through the same shit. My current plan is to try and do something every weekend. Or, every other weekend (I've 3 day weekends every other week). Just fucking try something.