I'm really tired of the flawed idea that you can't be miserable if there is someone out there that has it worse than you. Following this logically that means there is only one person on this planet that can complain at any given time, there can only be one but it's an emo instead a highlander.
I think the point was perspective. Yes, "first-world problems" and analogous troubles can suck, too. Minor example - I'm currently annoyed about a work directive that will really crimp my style. And yes, I went on the other day about how driven I am feeling and how much I work, & it's all true - but this particular direction has the possibility to make me suffer, both bc of how I work best, and bc I have kind of a naturally bad attitude about what they're requiring. So, I'm super-annoyed atm and could be made miserable in general by it...or I could adapt, keep my focus, and
decide not to be miserable. It's going to take work not to be sulky about it, because I am childish about this particular issue. But I'd better get over letting it bother me, because no one who zeroes in on bothersome, inconvenient, discouraging things is the better for it.
I hope you have selected a career that is evergreen and will be around forever in this rapidly degrading world.
Nothing is fully immune from technology "advances" or cost-cutting. The work I do/have done won't disappear, though the number of people deemed necessary to do it will doubtlessly shrink. But OK, so...that means I should throw in the towel? Give up? Obsess over "it's over, bros"? That's dumb.
And "changing" isn't inherently "degrading." Be sure not to conflate the two.
There's enough in life to psyche you out, no need to pile on yourself.
I sure hope you are not avoiding the laundry, that is a job that needs to be done at least once a week.
I have a lot of clothes and don't have to recycle in a week. But yes, as much as I hate tedious and multi-step, time-consuming chores, it's less a pain when there's less of it to do each time.
There is a lot of time in a week? I beg to differ. 42 hours are already taken away, and then you have to factor in getting ready for work, and getting home and getting dinner and doing the daily chores. Then you have the minimum amount of sleep. I don't know where you get 40 hours free time from but that is certainly not the case
I already showed the math, including get-ready, commute, and sleep time. That said, I was thinking today, as I was mentally grousing about the in-office edicts (to do with time in-office vs wfh) and trying to get over being a child about it, I was thinking of coming back here and modifying what I'd said - because I agree that "full" days in office do fuck the day quite a bit. My time from wake-up to sitting down to work is 5x as long on in-office days than on wfh days. And a full day in office, for me, sucks my momentum. Like, I'm mad I had to slog through the afternoon dip and also face the stuff at home that I could have done when I had energy at 2 pm while engaged in the 8th meeting of the day if at home.
So if I was overly dismissive of the energy and time suck of regular workdays, I am retroactively notching it down a bit. But only a bit, because if you're in normal health, and especially if you don't have dependents requiring full attention for hours after work, and maybe especially if you're not too many decades old, you have the capacity, on many, if not all, days, to do more for yourself.
How often do you get to listen to owls? Once or twice a year?
I hear them at least weekly, sometimes everyday.
How often do you have something you appreciate happen in your day.
Every single day. Because I appreciate a lot of things...and I make a point to find something. I gave a couple of tiny examples. As an exercise, I looked at my yesterday and tallied up the "something I appreciated" moments I had after work. I had 10. 10. Good music on the commute, couple of convos with randoms, calls with a couple of my kids, a low key but delicious peasant dinner from stuff I'd made and frozen a week ago, a minor personal task I'd avoided - done, a nice drink or two, a little time outside, some very passive hobby time (NY Times crosswords), a clean kitchen sink, and coffee set up for the morning. Technically, that's 12, I guess. 13, if you count truly enjoying and appreciating getting into a comfortable bed with good sheets and pillows.
Small stuff - but man, I just told you of
10 or 13 things I found between 5 pm and bedtime that I appreciated and enjoyed. And that's on a day I was sulking and whining to myself over the office stuff. Not a "5 star day," just standard stuff. I could have looked at it as bleak and pointless, hamster on a wheel dullness. And quotidian is quotidian, not pretending it was an exhilarating or extraordinary Wednesday (and I like extraordinary things a lot). But instead, I experienced it as a fine day with a number of really nice little moments that I appreciated. Earlier in the week one post-work night was a volunteer thing for just a couple of hours; another day was a semi-jog/walk - for less than an hour, no bragging here - but it was nice and reminded me that there is time.
Let's say I was into bike riding. When would I do that exactly? At best for an hour on a weekend day right.
I used to ride a little. 50 miles on a Saturday was a nice half+-day or whatever (I wasn't fast, didn't aim to be). My ex did it it much more frequently, seemed to love it. Some people golf on a weekend morning, when they don't have other obligations, whatever.
It's not all or nothing, and you seem to think it is. This week it's an hour bike ride (and btw I see cyclists out at 6, 7, 8 pm after work on weekdays, any time of day sat/sun, in warmer/lighter months; some people bike 20 miles to work, year-round [and some of them are insane, but they seem to like it]); maybe next week it's a half-hour (or 3-hour) walk or hike on a Sunday, or maybe a drive to a nice view and watch a sunset. Whatever is nice to you.
Saying, why bother if I can't do it everyday is silly, especially if you're not doing it at all.
How exactly does that light up the rest of the week and improve life?
Biologically, exercise tends to lift mood, as does getting outside, changing your scenery, etc., but
that aside, anything you enjoy and actually do improves life...unless you're focused on how much you can't do it, thereby a) robbing yourself of the enjoyment of what you do have/have available, and b) likely squelching any possibility of getting creative about how to do it more.
But that focus is a choice (putting aside clinical-grade situations). Deciding not to bother because it just won't make everything 24/7 butterflies and rainbows or turn the world upside-down is just eeyore-ing. And rejecting all of the world's offerings because "something something we're doomed" is a choice - a choice of perspective and a choice not to try.
These tiny rare pinpricks of sunrays in the darkness do nothing to make the 99% darkness bearable.
Wouldn't it be weird if pinpricks led to more pinpricks, and more, and more, until it's more light than dark?
And today found fresh cherries at Costco, just when I didn't expect to see any. Packed on 30 January and flown up here. $11 for a two-pound package, got a couple of packages. Hope there will be more next week. We'll start getting local cherries here in May.
Cherries at Costco already? Hot damn! I make myself ill eating too many at a time when they're available. No ragerts.
I'm glad the VA is good for your hearing needs. And hope the other tests come back all good.
