How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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Walking around the neighborhood, & found what seems to be an exploded pidgeon with half its insides just sprayed everywhere and a twisted leg lying next to its head. :cringe:

Hope this is not a sign
 
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Reactions: Mesh Gear Fox
Just got a new job I will have to work at for the foreseeable future. God I missed being unemployed and having free time.
Free time is great until all your hobbies start feeling boring because you have no purpose.

Turns out Frank Herbert was right: "Seek discipline and find your liberty” wasn’t just clean-your-room nonsense.
 
Not that I ever take weather dot com's constant predictions of doom all that seriously, but fuck me.
1750373713202.webp
 
I was chilling in bed and I noticed a spider on the ceiling, the idiot must've tripped and fell down and now I have no idea where he landed.

It's a mystery...!
 
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Reactions: Captain Syrup
I honestly don't know. I feel pretty burned out on a lot of things, and after going to a concert with some friends I've realized that I've been like this for a couple of years now. I was able to get some PTO for the next couple of days, but I don't know if that will help.
 
I've had insomnia due to completing all the artworks I needed to do. I was dipped heavily, and I started having demonic nightmares about my family, started hearing unknown voices and facing crazy inner demons based from my "creativity". I've been seriously doubting myself as an artist, and why did I pick this passion in the first place, and why did I choose the worst niche. I've been suffering amnesia for 4 years, and my memory is somehow all-over-the-place. I was in a deep dark spot where my demons want to overcome me and my inner turmoils enduring "smiling depression".

I fumbled inside for a year now, I didn't have the confidence to tell how anxious, nervous, fatigued and how much I deeply hated myself, both choices and following my passion. I kept telling myself that I am useless, I am a worthless Gook, I am ugly out and inside, I am retarded, I never take proper meds if I didn't do 6 dosages in a day to alleviate my fears. I wanted to be happy, but I can't and I am always nervous and pessimistic, burnt out and stressed out to no end, and venting on how much I want to kill myself because I follow my passion and that I was literally retarded and mentally unstable, and constantly ripping off my scars to make them bleed because of immense self-doubt and hatred towards myself and my ego.

I wish I never really was an artist and a bother and not born being mentally ill. God, how I loved my low self-esteem and lack of self-awareness as a person. Fucking hell.
 
Did my first assignment for my new job. I got asked if I had to travel back to the East Coast to move all my shit immediately or if I could do a field assignment immediately. I thought "fuck it...sure".

Pretty much the last 24 hours or so, I've been fielding frantics calls on whether or not I'm alive. I wasn't at the Massey Pad when the rocket blew up during testing (I've been working on the launch pad).

Based on the fittings, workmanship, the lack of any concept of project planning and QA, along with the whole "OSHA is evil" mindset, I'm not surprised at all that this company is blowing shit up left and right.

I can literally watch a concrete pad get poured, cured, and start crumbling in real time here. It's amazing. They don't run any testing or sampling on materials that they are using.

And all the engineers are idiot zoomers. I had a kid tell me to commissioning a piece of equipment while a fucking panel was open less than six inches from me and they were doing a high pot test on power cables.

"Yeah...why don't you fuck off instead"

I made good money. Easily over 160 hours in two weeks. But for 90% if it, I was sitting in a chair, surfing my phone.

At one point, I pointed out to the kid "You have me here at 7am. But you guys are never ready for me until around 5pm. Why not have me show up at 3pm. I'll shift my sleep. It will cost you a lot less as I won't be doing overtime."

"No. You need to be here in the morning in case we are ready in the morning".

"Okay. Well in a related note, you need to sign this updated PO because I blew through the entire month long budget for hours in a week."

Fucking unreal.
 
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