How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

I'm extremely tired, like I never fully woke up. Another day inside today and tomorrow, too. Gonna get to work on a few projects tomorrow when I can think a bit more clearly
 
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Apart from slowly accepting the fact that I am going to be a NEET until this crisis is over, I'm okay. I get to do some freelance work at least, even if the guy running it is a slowfuck who is awful at explaining things. I mostly sleep or play games. Normally I'd be ashamed of being an unproductive lazyass but there's literally nothing I can do but wait it out. Might as well relax while I'm doing it.

On another note, I miss going out to eat. Like a LOT. I'm sheltering with my family currently and my dad is a hardass about me going out and about, even for fast food.
 
Tired.

Each week that goes on its another coworker or two opting to not work until this blows over. More slack for everyone else to pick up. The increase in hours is nice during a crunch and I shouldnt gripe about it, but man the fatigue is real. Very close to saying fuck it and cashing in on my sick time for April.
 
So bored. Thankfully I have The Orville to watch, but I'm so sick of being inside.

I finally realized today there isn't some green evil mist going around. So long as you're not around people, there's virtually zero risk. So I decided to take a walk today, not touching or coming across anything or anyone, and, it did a lot for me. Something so basic is like a release now.
Wish I still had my scooter, so I could go further and faster.
Bortus and Klyden getting addicted to Marlboros was the goddamn funniest thing, I would have introduced them to work o' day plug tobacco and partied with those space homos.
 
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I was making so much progress on my anxiety and depression. I had my life all in order, finally began to feel good about myself... and then the pandemic hit.

My mental health has been on an absolute downwards spiral since then; I haven't felt this horrible since middle school. If I had the methods, then I could become an hero, but I don't so I'll have to settle with self-destruction. Only things keeping me sane are Tiger King and video games. Breath of the Wild, while not as good as I remember when I first played it, is still a lotta fun.
 
My father moved in with me late last week before we got the stay and shelter. He's old, has a mess of health issues, and was renting in a house with 7 people. The purpose was to limit his exposure and keep him safe. I woke up yesterday to the sound of him hacking and after learning that he's been feeling sick for the past week, before he moved in, I told him if he has the wuflu and got me sick I would kill him before the virus does. He's always had this awfull habit of visiting while sick and while he claims it's a sinus infection I have him check his temperature every few hours just in case. Had my contact at HR inform me that not enough people took the early retirement package so there is going to be another round of layoffs in early April, also that the number is much steeper thanks to Covid. So either I lose my job or I get to keep it but I will be expected to do the job of 9 people instead of 4.

In summary seething in anger, apathetic about my job's future and I have bought all the required items to flush my father down the toilet if he gave me covid..

If it makes you feel any better, it's 99.9% likely he just has the plain ol' rhinovirus otherwise known as the common cold.

Even with the numbers rising, you still have a better chance of winning a lottery jackpot then you do of getting the Wu Flu. Should it actually be Covid-19, he's far more likely to die of it then you are from the sounds of him so that will be punishment enough don't you think?
 
Despite fucking up my sleep, I feel alright. Got some fresh air and I'll probably watch some shows today, not sure what yet. Maybe I'll watch Tiger King finally.
 
I'm far from socialist and I've watched Fight Club too many times but if all the bullshit about credit reports and landlord background checks and all the things that made my life harder went away because of the Coof it might have been worth it.
 
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Having severe waves of health anxiety since my throat developed a tickle a few days ago. No dry coughs unless I deliberately do so. However as I live in NY (not in NYC, but close), seeing the number of confirmed cases and deaths skyrocket each day is making me incredibly shook up.

I’m only 28 but people as young as 21 are dying out of nowhere; young adults who only displayed mild symptoms for 2-3 days before being unable to breathe, requiring emergency care and a ventilator, and then dying within 48 hours. Then we have the announcement that there are so many deaths that the city is setting up refrigerated trucks to act as mobile morgues. My breath has also been short from overthinking. I’ve also been taking more of my ADHD meds than I should be in order to help keep me focused on other shit to distract myself from the news. Which is definitely not helping my overall health due to a lack of decent sleep and overall restlessness.

After being strongly encouraged to wear masks and rubber gloves from statewide sources, I’ve only left my house once to go to the pharmacy. However I’ve been taking random food trips to the convenience store this past week before the virus really hit hard, and I’m worried that I might’ve gotten the virus. Symptoms can take anywhere from 7-14 days to manifest and I cannot keep myself calm.

Sorry for the blog. I just haven’t been this worried about anything in years. I don’t want to die young. Call me a faggot or whatever— I just want this entire pandemic to fade away.
 
Doing quite fine I think, even when now I have much lower income now due to the coronavirus. Glad I finished renovating my house just before the outbreak began in my country. Work from home sucks tho. I feel like teaching via online apps is such a chore and sometimes it makes classes feel awkward.

Last week I had this fucking neckache, presumably caused by too much lying down. It's fine now after I applied some ointments. As for boredom, I managed to ease it a bit with vidya, model kits, watching youtube, and doing exercises, but I really want to meet and hang out with my friends. I really hope this pandemic ends soon.
 
Throats finally feels much better from hurting it at work taking orders. Displeased dinner date was cancelled due to C-Chan popping up. Since i can't get started on doing some prop weapons for cosplay, I might just practice on MK11.
 
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Still looking for a new job, not helped with so many places such down due to corona. I'll find something eventually, plenty of places near me have openings, so it's just a matter of hanging in there until I hear back from someone.

In the meantime, I get to spend some extra time with my grandma and pets, so there's a silver lining there.
 
Generally less nervous about catching the plague now that the occupancy of the hotel has dropped to the single digits. Of course now I'm worried about the integrity of my job. All this corona shit hit just when I was really getting into the swing of going to the gym too. But I'm not going to let the world keep me a fatty any longer, so I'll probably start doing walks around town or some shit. Work up to jogging like a normal person eventually.
 
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