How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

Been feeling pretty frustrated over a lot of things.

Work has been stressful, especially since yesterday they pulled my midday partner over to another department because the guy who's supposed to be in that department apparently keeps leaving hours early, leaving me all by myself on the floor. Thankfully, my supervisors are pretty forgiving so long as I'm actually working, but it bugs me that I couldn't do everything I was normally supposed to do because of something I can't control.

Also just been getting frustrated over the direction my country is going and feeling like there's nothing I can do about it. I want to have kids someday, but I'm scared that they too will get swept up under our current political zeitgeist. Thankfully, I live in Texas where people have been pushing back against that sort of thing, but I don't know how long that will last or what it will be like years down the line. My workplace practically bent the knee right after the whole George Floyd incident and corporate went almost full woke.

Also been trying to get over my fear of driving. I have my license and I just got my first actual car, but I found myself terrified to leave my apartment complex in it. I've only ever drove with my old man or a driving instructor.

What seems to keep me going however is spite. I saw an ad from I think the Wall Street Journal online through YouTube about how ride sharing will eliminate the need for cars or something like that, and at the end of the ad they ask, "Is it time to give up your car?"

Fuck you! I just got my car! I've spent years getting over my stupid fears and insecurities to become independent and now you're trying to pressure me into giving that up? I want to be able to have kids and take them to school! (Unless Texas schools go in that direction as well)

I recognize that worrying over the future doesn't help much. It's out of my control as well as what other people do and say. I'm just so exhausted.

Other than that, gotta keep trucking I guess. : /
Oh, the whole woke shit and great reset stuff is horrible. If I was less pain averse I would have just done the rational thing long ago because IRL is doomed.
 
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Oh, the whole woke shit and great reset stuff is horrible. If I was less pain averse I would have just done the rational thing long ago because IRL is doomed.
That is not even close to rational. That’s the coward’s way out.

Nothing is doomed so long as you stay alive and keep striving for your dreams. Cheesy, I know, but it’s kept me alive.
 
Most fruits aren't the best thing if you diet without exercising. Also, for real? Just about EVERY?


No one says you should exercise. Walk, work around the house, beat the shit out of someone, etc. Exercises are good since muscle mass consumes energy, so you will have harder time getting fat again.


Well, that requires more willpower than dieting+exercises. You just need to change some things in your diet and move a little more.
First, thank you!
As for my allergies, I may be exaggerating, but, a lot of vegetables and stuff I've had have given me reactions and there's no real way of telling which ones I'm allergic too. After I ate some celery and almost died, I figured maybe it's not worth the risk.
 
After I ate some celery and almost died, I figured maybe it's not worth the risk.
Oh, shit, this is serious.

and there's no real way of telling which ones I'm allergic too
I think, medical professionals has something like a template with marked holes that they put on your back and put different allergic agents and look which causes a reaction. I am not sure if it works for all allergies though.
 
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Oh, shit, this is serious.


I think, medical professionals has something like a template with marked holes that they put on your back and put different allergic agents and look which causes a reaction. I am not sure if it works for all allergies though.
Yea, I've had those tests. They give you general readings for like, pollens and such, but they don't get down to super specifics. I'm the same with dogs, but not deathly. I'm allergic to some dogs but not all, not that it has ever stopped me from petting a good dog. So I'm not sure what the exact factors on my allergies are that make them tick, especially since it's not food exclusive.
 
Been having a good period the past month or so. My part time temp job promoted me to full time permanent so I've been adjusting to that. It's the first positive job experience I've had in awhile. Been dealing with bog standard lockdown depression this year and this has been enough to get my head in the right place for personal projects again.
 
The package I told about earlier today. The mail service decided to not bother driving it to the usual shop I go get packages at. I guess it's fine, since I had to get another package, which I didn't even think would be here today. Since the tracking stopped at the terminal in my city, on Monday. Got the notification on the gym.
Don't really like getting more than one package at a time though, especially since the other one is expensive and fragile.

And packages you order is like Xmas, expect it's items you actually want.
 
That is not even close to rational. That’s the coward’s way out.

Nothing is doomed so long as you stay alive and keep striving for your dreams. Cheesy, I know, but it’s kept me alive.

Cheesy boomer-tier platitude? Sure, but thoughts and feelings like this has kept me, family, and friends alive.

Keep breathing frens. You never know what the tide will bring in. ❤️
 
I’m getting used to the summer heat. I like to go fishing as soon as the sun starts to set. It’s not so bad when you go out and it’s like 94, but then it progressively drops to the mid or low 80s. I bought a new baitcaster reel and I’m dying to test it out Saturday.
 
"Your smart and you know you shouldn't eat two ice creams in a day."
Me who could literally give less of a shit because I've had no emotions for a long ass time
And got screamed at for trying to take a powernap. Shit's getting harder by the day even with me getting out more
Oh shit I know those blues, too. Shit sucks fam, but it's the little things; rejoice at the fact we live in an era that being the occasional fatkid has thousands of indulgences just in ice cream alone and so many of the "lite" ones taste better and that means you can actually do it on occasion.
 
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Three weeks today since the surgery. Doing a little more every day, without pushing things. Rest some but not as much as when returning from the hospital. Walked some outside today without a cane or walker. Felt pretty good. Grateful for the progress, and triply grateful not to live with the constant pain. Still have some random, minor things come up, but believe when nerves have been involved recovery isn't linear at all. Just go for a little improvement each day, let things build on themselves. 👍
 
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