How could Chris get into (better) shape?

[QI 541]

If he decides to go swimming, he'll probably wear a bikini to the pool. And I'm not even sure if he can swim.

 

[teheviltwin]

Yoga.

This. Chris has shown that, like many other autists, he has poor co-ordination and balance as well as being unfit. Although I'd probably recommend this rather than DDP:

Mostly because Sara Ivanhoe is a very calm and softly spoken woman and DDP is, well, FUCKING AWESOME!... sorry... I mean't a more military style motivator.

I would say swimming as moving through a different medium does wonderful things to the brain. Even if you just walk around the shallow end the water resistance is great for toning. But that would mean people swimming in water OPL has been in...

 

[snowkitten91]

I would say swimming as moving through a different medium does wonderful things to the brain. Even if you just walk around the shallow end the water resistance is great for toning. But that would mean people swimming in water OPL has been in...

 

[Very Honest Content]

Yoga.

This. Chris has shown that, like many other autists, he has poor co-ordination and balance as well as being unfit. Although I'd probably recommend this rather than DDP:

Mostly because Sara Ivanhoe is a very calm and softly spoken woman and DDP is, well, FUCKING AWESOME!... sorry... I mean't a more military style motivator.

Well, DDP is a JERK who, luckily, is now 51+ years of age so while Chrissy wouldn't wish him death or aging, but you're right, he does exhibit some very brute male characteristics that might cause and .

Meanwhile this Sara Ivanhoe, she appears to possibly match the requirements for the search for an 18-(his current age), smoke-free, non-black, average to high income, potential Sweetheart from the Ground-Up! If only can overcome his NOIOPHOBIA then the possibility of is in play!

 

[teheviltwin]

Perfectly put.

Oh, and the problem with yoga is that even though you only really need a mat to do it you do also need space...

 

[Very Honest Content]

He takes his sex doll outside for a date with Jackie in full gear but can't use the spacious grounds of 14BC to streatch with a potential Sweetheart from the Ground-Up to, at worst, potential gal-pal, like Siri, in this Sara woman? I mean, he's lazy and but come on!

 

[teheviltwin]

He takes his sex doll outside for a date with Jackie in full gear but can't use the spacious grounds of 14BC to streatch with a potential Sweetheart from the Ground-Up to, at worst, potential gal-pal, like Siri, in this Sara woman? I mean, he's lazy and but come on!

He'd need to be able to watch the dvd out there too...

 

[Zim]

If it aint vidya related he's not going to do it. That being said, my cousin lost about 40lbs when he got addicted to DDR back in the day. Then he gained it back when he got addicted to WoW.

Anyway, it's a moot point. Losing weight takes exactly everything that Chris doesn't have. Changing habits and self discipline? Not on his watch!

 

[Very Honest Content]

There's not something in the iDeabook that can call up this;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qV6hyDqMFJE

and play it for him to be able to see between practice bathrooms sessions at McDonalds with whatever piece of blow up plastic he's using as a partner?

Again, and lazy, but doable even for autists.

 

[teheviltwin]

There's not something in the iDeabook that can call up this;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qV6hyDqMFJE

and play it for him to be able to see between practice bathrooms sessions at McDonalds with whatever piece of blow up plastic he's using as a partner?

Again, and lazy, but doable even for autists.

That's awesome. I did not realise it was on youtube. Although he'd want the beginner one not the intermediate.

Ahhhh, all the hypothetical things Chris could do... If he wasn't Chris.

 

[Caddchef]

He could stand up more.

So more Guitar Hero then?

 

[CatParty]

maybe he can begin the pro-ana saga.

 

[NobleGreyHorse]

I should think that Prancercise (how the hell do you even spell that?) would be ideal for him. You just dance around like an idiot while thinking of ponies. We know he can do those things...

 

[CatParty]

I should think that Prancercise (how the hell do you even spell that?) would be ideal for him. You just dance around like an idiot while thinking of ponies. We know he can do those things...

sashayercise

 

[pickleniggo]

maybe he can begin the pro-ana saga.

It takes too much will power. Also, considering he'd be his own THINspiration, I can't see him getting anywhere with it.

 

[Great Unclean Chris]

Escaping barb forever would be good exercise, i guess....

 

[Sexual Stallone]

Chris its in one of the toughest situations a person can be in as a starting point towards being more fit, the only thing I can think of which could be worse is him being morbidly obese, like 350-400 pounds. Why is he in such a bad situation? If you look at the "whale watch" video, the scale displays something like 220 pounds, something that made a lot of people skeptical, thinking he adjusted the scale to make it display a smaller number (You can do it with almost any scale) But that may very well be true, I mean, if you look at his arms and legs, you'll be surprised how scrawny they are compared to his torso, that's because he's so sedentary, his muscle mass It's very low, so those 220 pounds are almost entirely fat.

Thats why he's in such bad health and getting him fit would be a very difficult task. He needs small, incremental changes in his diet and exercise routine, you just can't put someone who weights 220 pounds of pure fat to run 10 miles, It's not feasible. In order for him to get in shape is something that would take a lot of time and will power, but as we all know, this TRUE and HONEST high-functioning STRAIGHT autistic individual it's not the one to blame, WE, the SLANDEROUS TROLLS are the culprits, we haven't rushed to 14 Branchland Court to help him exercise and diet, also, we haven't fixed his life for him. Shame on us! ]P

 

[Cwckifan]

Yoga.

Counting calories is the first step like posted before, personally I use Calorific and since he's and not good at math that would be ideal for him getting a decent estimate of intake and more importantly taking advantage of the fact that just the act of monitoring your intake daily means you make better decisions naturally about what you put in your body.

The lifestyle change would then really begin to show results if he'd do about 30 minutes of yoga every other day as well to start and gradually increased it to an hour or an hour and a half five to seven days of the week. Personally I've been playing the Hulkster's buddy, Dallas Page's, DDP Yoga workouts these last few weeks and his big gimmick during the yoga positions is to add in dynamic resistance exercises in pushups to not only raise your heart-rate to a fat burning pace but to help get muscle tone built while still performing low impact exercises. Just as an example of the kind of transformation that is possible from this kind of lifestyle change I'll provide this link of one of the more exceptional personal cases who have achieved results we would consider 'miraculous' for Chris if he were to take responsibility for his physical well being by dedicating himself to a physical wellness regiment instead of whining on facebook about his chest pains;

http://www.ddpyoga.com/site/index.php/en/results/83-arthur

But assuming he'll be too lazy for any of that, start walking at his brisk pace around the neighborhood for an hour and a half a day, if he can't make that, start with an hour, or 30 minutes, and gradually increase the duration. He's already at an age and point now I'd suspect that he's choosing consciously or otherwise how close to forty five he'll end up living or falling short of with each and every bite he sinks his autistic fangs into.

While I agree with the walking and watching his food, counting calories is a waste of time, and yoga can be quite lame (and painful) for someone who's not physically well conditioned. As such, he should really watch (not count) his macronutrients (fat, protein, and carbs) instead, and do a little bit of resistance training each day (one set of however many pushups, pullups, chinups, plank, and squats he can do as a beginner is fine). Really, that is not hard for anyone to do

 

[Kosher Dill]

I would remind him that Barb is imprisoning him, and he swore never to eat prison food.

 

[CatParty]

I would remind him that Barb is imprisoning him, and he swore never to eat prison food.

she quit making food after the spaghetti incident