How do you deal with fear of death?

[Maurice Caine]

Here's my secret, I don't. Hopefully whatever bezos does to extend his lifetime indefinitely gets into my hands but that's a snowball's chance in hell.

 

[HandsomeDan]

I'm Christian, I don't fear death.

I certainly do what I can to avoid death though as we all should.

 

[LaxerBRO]

I wasn't afraid of the time before my birth so why should I fear the time after I exist?

All I fear is suffering and agony that comes with a painful or violent death. If I knew I was going to die in my sleep when I am reasonably healthy, I would kind of welcome it.

Better than dying of cancer or dying slowly of the effects of Alzheimer's.

 

[Fek]

Being religious sounds like it would help. Hasn't helped me.

Well, can you identify what it is about your faith that's leaving you lacking the type of answer that would grant you peace? There are plenty of answers out there, but there isn't another soul in this world who can do the work of finding it for you.

As an example, my own journey started from a completely different angle and with a very simple question: "What does it mean to love thy neighbor?"
In my efforts to answer that question (and I mean really deeply thoroughly answer it), I ended up taking quite a journey (one that I'm still on, frankly). Along the way, I found my answer for why death is truly not to be feared.

Your mileage may vary.

It seems that there's some way to conquer that fear. I just wish I knew what it was.

Try poking at the borders you've constructed with your beliefs. Fear (in this context) usually comes from a place of ignorance, so you may wish to test those borders and see how they might be strengthened. In doing so, perhaps your fear of death will also be alleviated.

Spoiler: And now for something completely different

You're just confused.

I might be.

I'm atheist at this point but i'm not afraid of death.

Nice, how'd you accomplish that?

I just pray

>atheist
>pray

You're right, I am a little confused.

 

[Moderna]

I was four when I learned that I and everyone I know will eventually die but didn't fully realize the weight of that until seven or eight. Weirdly, the idea of my parents dying always bothered me more than the idea of me dying. I used to stay up at night crying about the idea of living in a world without them and watching them get older has been difficult for me. To this day I have no idea how people are able to function after losing a parent.

I've never been religious but have heard stories about dying people seeing loved ones who have already passed and talking to them as if they were actually there in the room and hell, the universe is already bizarre beyond anything we could possibly imagine so there may very well be something resembling an afterlife. My personal theory, though, is that being dead feels like not having been born yet. I find comfort in the fact that I've experienced that before and it wasn't so bad.

 

[AMHOLIO]

I take it one day at a time. I think about actions to do to make my life easier and focus on my goals. I do my best to help and be nice to people because it brings me genuine happiness and I like the idea of making other's lives here on this planet marginally nicer even for five seconds. I figure if I do whatever is my best in life, I'll be more at peace with death. I'll be more pissed, panicked, and fearful for dying early or due to something unavoidable, but I have to occupy myself with my actual goals on this earthly plane until that happens. And if it happens, I did my best to make me and my social circle's lives better, even though I'd be devastated like anyone else. But until then, my fear of death should not drive me, my love for the pleasures and joys of life should. Studying, friends, family, hobbies, exploring small and large towns, driving through countrysides, eating a tasty blackberry, meeting nice animal friends... there's a lot of things to focus on that will help me and others. You'll always come up short in life, but it is how it is.

I also agree with @Kari Kamiya . That mothrafucker has the right ideas. I've met old folks with the same sentiment and I understand the more I learn about aging, and try not to begrudge it, just make sure their time until then is marginally less sucky.

 

[Suburban Bastard]

Idk man, browsing this site kinda makes me wanna die

 

[Vingle]

Things aren't going to get better you are obsessing of it. I'm aware of it, and the fact that I'm most likely to be one of those cases were an elderly person dies alone. And only gets found when the neighbours complain about the foul smell.

It's sad, but hey. What can you do.

 

[Butter Keks]

I was in a car accident and hit my head, rendering me comatose for longer than two weeks. Looking back on it, being "off" (so to speak) was not a bad thing. The lost time never bothered me and not having a recollection of anything good or bad happening is oddly comforting. If I never woke up from it I wouldn't even know. The worst part about death is the leadup to it. Just hope you don't see it coming.

Also imagine that death is a smoking hot titty waifu that desperately wants you.

 

[Dutch Courage]

Funny, I was also 23 when I finally got it too. 23 seems to be when you realize shit's real, with all that portends. Later in life, I came to the realization that I was far more upset about the fact that loved ones get old and die more than about my own death.

But cowering from death is a 'tarded way to live, in the literal sense of the word. If nothing else, it offers a compelling reason to grow up; it sucks to die without accepting life first.

Just fit as much as you can into life while you are still young enough to do so, and not only will you be too busy to dwell on mortality, you'll accrue memories that will enable you to say "I'm glad I did that in my life". And try not to fuck too many people over in life, because they will haunt you in later years.

And religious or not, just assume that we understand nothing about death really, or time itself. So, at least you embark on a great mystery voyage at the end. It it happens to be to oblivion, you'll never know it. If it goes anywhere else, you are already winning.

 

[Afinepickle]

I struggle with this a lot personally. It's not the idea of pain or suffering or even dying slowly that gets to me so much though I personally find the idea of Alzheimer's specifically horrifying.

It's more the existential fear of the nihil, of the cessation of all experience.

To date nothing has really eased that fear and unease I have for that all that much, not even religion/spirituality. That nagging fear of the complete cessation of the state of existence.

So I guess for me the answer is that I mostly don't and whenever the thought of it creeps into my head I have little internal panic attacks that last until the thought leaves my head.

 

[Disheveled Human]

I remember getting a bad flu one year and I felt so sick I didn't care if I died so the mind can embrace death. As for a quick and sudden death like an accident you get flooded with adrenaline and feel less pain. Just don't get tortured to death and its probably not that bad. Personally the more and more I get older I fear people I love dying around me more then myself dying.

 

[Chaos Theorist]

I'm not scared of death just of the pain before death.

Death would be a release from this flesh prison.

 

[PaulBearer]

By accepting that it must happen, as it has happened to billions before me.

 

[Battlecruiser3000ad]

I used to stress about it but after a near-death experience it went away
I'm still a big coward and afraid of agony tho

 

[Doctor Ivo Robotnik Sr.]

I was less fearful of death as an atheist than as an agnostic. I think the uncertainty scares me more then anything else.

Read arguments outside of the 20th century about it.

 

[ARghEAT]

It could be because of your attachment to life and living. As humans, we are programmed to avoid loss and our body itself makes us feel pain when we lose something that we value a lot - a loved one, a big opportunity, etc - the most valued usually being your own life. By realising this, you might see things differently.

Also, what happens after death may as well be completely arbitrary (as long as it satisfies certain conditions) so there's no use in worrying about what will happen in death because you'll have no way to predict what will happen or plan for it - for all you know, the god presiding over the universe punishes people for not eating spaghetti or something.

 

[PaleTay]

I just hate most people and it would be something new, in most afterlifes I won't have to commute or work. I'll get everything interesting done before I die, besides ridiculous things like finding mythical items or creatures.

 

[Golly]

I don't want to die and I take steps to avoid an untimely demise, so I fear death to that capacity. Beyond that though, at least while I'm reasonably young, I'm comfortable with knowing I have little to no control of my moment of death because the actual experience of dying is short and trippy. In the meantime, all I can do is find balance between living a life that is authentic to my desires, and doing my best to not be a net drain on humanity. That way, whatever happens after, whether it's oblivion or some kind of afterlife, I can be at peace knowing I've at least tried.

The death of those I love is what upsets me far more as a concept. I don't handle grieving well. The only answer I have at the moment is to try not to dwell on it.

 

[RollerGator]

Italian gravediggers during the plague had a saying: Those who live in fear die!