I have a niece who wants to transition, how do I talk her down from it?

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wtfNeedSignUp said:
Pretty sure that's a jailable offense. Or at least I think, I never had the courage to watch it.
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It's not illegal since it doesn't involve kids. It's gross as hell but it gets the point across why these surgeries are horrifying. Shame that Jim was never able to make this and furry pandemonium regular series because of the cancer.
 
So... the next time I get to talk to that side of the family is during a Christmas get together. That's another thing that bugs me is this feels like the wrong time to bring it up. One thing I might be able to do though is show her the thread with all the anti-trans memes though. My niece has a sense of humor (she legit likes to LARP as a Hitler fan sometimes) so maybe that will reach her.

Rudolf's Friend said:
It's not illegal since it doesn't involve kids. It's gross as hell but it gets the point across why these surgeries are horrifying. Shame that Jim was never able to make this and furry pandemonium regular series because of the cancer.
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Sorry, I don't keep up, but... Metokur has cancer? I thought he was just a former youtuber who got shunted off because their rules changed. I still have an offline copy of his "LGBSCP" video.

Smashed & Slamed said:
It's one throw away sentence dude. I know your autistic you don't also need ADD.
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Having ADD is better than having 5th Edition, being honest. I just wish I had some Ravenloft modules.
 
I would say something like the following, which is my opinion. And I would try not to take an adversarial tone.

"I find the trans movement very regressive. In my day, feminism and progress was about breaking down gender stereotypes which restricted people. Like a girl is fascinated by engines and wants to be a mechanic? She should be allowed to be a mechanic - so long as she can do it. It was about allowing individuality. And we made huge strides with that. The trans movement to me feels like it's taking away from what we achieved. You get a young girl who's interested in cars now saying she has "a boy brain". As if a girl shouldn't be interested in cars and if she is it's a sign she's not fully a girl. That's basically a return to the 1950s. I don't like that."

That's a good start because it's 100% true and it might introduce her to the idea that people can disagree with the trans ideology for reasons other than "we are old / ignorant". Which is the default for how teenagers view anyone over 30.

On the specifics of the boy vs girl brain, it's never been (a) credibly shown and (b) shown as significant. Keep the tone friendly but to prepare you a couple of the things you sometimes get with some responses are as follows:
  • There are differences between a cis brain and a trans brain. If this were so, they'd develop the ability to test which brain you had. Would you be happy if there were a test that could tell you if you were trans or not? And if it came back negative?
  • There are differences between male and female brains. Yes, and they're developmental not intrinsic. The brains develop slightly differently because they are washed in different hormones as they grow. Take any brain and develop it in a female or male growing body and it develops in accord with the sex of the body it grows in. Male brains are larger on average for example. Why? Because men have bigger heads and the brain grows to fill the available space.
  • You can tell the difference between male and female brain cells. Well sure, you can tell the difference between male and female cells in the human eye or in musclefibres, by looking at the chromosomes. But is that a significant difference?
But this is a taster. I would visit https://www.transgendertrend.com/ which is one of the best sites for material on this subject and read a couple of their information packs for schools or other resources. It'll prepare you for a lot of the common misconceptions.

But I would also emphasise something else which is very important. See if you can identify why she wants to be "trans". The motivation for young women is very different to that of the adult autogynephile males. Often it is a discomfort with developing as a woman and male attention and being a "boy" is thought to be a way to avoid that. It can also simply be a way of seeking societal approval for being gender-nonconforming. It's okay to be into the boy stuff if you're trans - nobody will criticise, right? Or it can be as simple as a desire to be special - which all teenagers crave as they are forced to transition from childhood where they are the centre of the universe to adulthood where they realise they're not.

Don't interrogate her on the above. But listen to her and see if you can work out why.

You might also tell her it can be very lonely being a boy. We don't support each other in the same ways and the ways we do support each other can be rough. She could be very lonely as a trans male. Much of the validation and attention you get for it will vanish once you leave school. Leaving you feeling very much the odd one out without anyone giving any allowances for it.

I hope this helps. Remember, listen as well as talk. Don't be ashamed of talking to her about it - especially from her - kids are tough, I'm sure she can handle an adult questioning her beliefs. But also listen and try to understand what drives her on this.
 
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Not sure if this can be reasoned out of her. I’m not sure that’s how people, especially young people, work.

Probably just try to be there for her and avoid giving her attention (positive or negative) for wanting to poon. On the positive side, most girls will eventually desist without hormones or surgery.
 
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I wanna answer this.

Ask her if she feels like she belongs in this special group of unique people. Then explain what a cult is and then show her how women would sometimes have their breasts burned off and men would get their genitalia cut. Show her how they all look the same and the cult leader is the only one who gets fancy stuff and goes and converts others while the rest of the followers never reach such heights. Best would be to start from ancient times to modern times and show her how nothing is new under the sun.

Show her people going from humans to blobs of flesh in real time, she'll catch on something is "off" she's designed to catch lies as a human being. Kids love morbid things, she can handle this.

Finally show her the song by Mindless Self Indulgence called, "You'll rebel to anything" and go over the lyrics of the song with her. It's about how someone thinks their pain is unique and special and tries to be cool by conforming to a group and by doing that they actually lose their identity, making them a loser. Children are edgy and cruel and she can handle this, this song always knocked sense back into me as a teenager whenever I felt like some special little butterfly flapping in the breeze.

And I saw you have an issue with porn, rule 34 bullshit. This is very simple. You walk in hell with them. You hold their hands and you walk through the flames and you keep a poker face so they always show you their interests and you praise the heterosexual pairings and you shame and question any fetish content they show you. I have helped raise children and they all have this porn phase, and you just have to socially condition them away from the trash. Yes they will see it but you have to be their filter, keep a straight face, and only shame for the poop and fart stuff, the feet, weird pregnancy and things like that.

EDIT: I just wanted to add, you shame with jokes. Keep it light but point out the absurdity gently.
 
Show her a picture of one of those hotdog neo-dicks.

Tell her Jews in the media have falsely elevated trans people into a celebrated, special class of people, but in reality everything hates them and they smell like poop.

Tell her each child transed by the medical establishment is a $4 million lifetime income stream to the gender clinics. It's not an organic movement, it's a profit-maxxing campaign for big pharma.

Tell her the drugs will ruin her brain.

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Its a phase it will pass, teens just want to be part of a club than they grow out of it when the next trend hits

But if you must, Passive implications (not targeted at her but just say out in the air) that being a man is incredibly lonely and lousy, or just go full “TAHKSICC MASCULINITY” male feminist mode
 
I think this is hard to answer because it depends on many factors.
General notes:
Being consistently trustworthy may be handy.
It's ultimately a belief of hers that she has socially committed to. Don't try to argue or manipulate because it'll likely backfire. "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."
If she likes science, street epistemology might be helpful.

I suppose a thing for the parents could be trying to find solid evidence that some stuff isn't safe and reversible. For example, I saw an ad on youtube from Planned Parenthood saying that puberty blockers were. They may be able to limit it to haircuts and clothes and names, the safer stuff, if it's just a phase.

Just to state the obvious, if you are this girl's uncle, I suggest you keep clear boundaries and avoid mentions of sex (some people here give weird advice).

I was a Teenage “JA”-man said:
But if you must, Passive implications (not targeted at her but just say out in the air) that being a man is incredibly lonely and lousy, or just go full “TAHKSICC MASCULINITY” male feminist mode
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It might backfire. I have met 3 pooners and they tend to give the vibe of wimpy, nonthreatening, polite men. I tried to get one to grow a backbone and work out before I found out it wasn't a base-model guy. They basically fit the male feminist role to a T.
 
I'm going through this at the moment with a young, male, close family member (although young, a legal adult, so they can do what they want) who wants to start on the female hormone path.

Over the years I've learned on here that specific responses tend to shut down communication. I don't want them ever turning to preddit for advice. I don't ever comment on whether I think they are or aren't trans (personally, I think they are probably either gay or bi and enjoy cross dressing occasionally). I keep discussions about it factual and make sure that they're accessing information that is accurate. We've discussed fertility issues, what changes will be irreversible if they go down the cross sex hormone path, and lighter stuff like why you never change your legal name immediately and why green eyeshadow is an appalling choice.

By not opposing him, I've established myself as a neutral, safe source of information and someone to whom he can express concerns. If you're not the parent, I think that's the most powerful and influential position you can establish.
 
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Encourage her to do things (anything) she finds joy in, and embrace that activity. Help her nurture her sense of self and her own unique identity apart from gender.
Encourage her to be the best whatever-her-name-is she can be, and fuck everything else.

I honestly think this whole trans debacle, for real girls, is mostly a lack of solid personal identity, sense of self, and pressure to confirm to what they are surrounded by.

Build up her self worth, and she'll realize being a pooner is fucking retarded.
 
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