I want just ONE normie hobby!!!! - Why can’t I be just a normal man

[Dicksmash Turbofist]

I can’t tell people 8 years of gamer gate history to someone in a reasonable amount of time to explain why a fat barred out rage pig squealing in Mexico is actually the funniest thing ever damn it!

Try painting warhammer. Normies think you're really artistic and talented because you're painting a very small model. As long as you don't talk too much about the lore, they don't seem to get too weirded out about it.

 

[Shart Attack]

I don't buy that you're an agreeable, sociable person. You come off as a cynical dickhead. You're doing that thing cynical dickheads do where they break a mundane thing down into smaller components and describe those in an unappealing way to make the thing sound worse than it is. "Gardening? You're just feeding cow shit to roots and leaves that will rot in a few weeks." "Sportsball? It's just overgrown, overpaid mutants touching each other in weird places between commercial breaks." Shit like that. This is something teenagers do because they think it makes them sound smart, like they can see through the bullshit everyone else is too blind to see, when really it just makes them sound like miserable idiots. People probably hate being around you because you're a miserable cunt, but you're too autistic to pick up on that, so you think you're a well-liked people person.

You're never going to find a "normie hobby" you enjoy, because you're a cynical, joyless dickhead. You also think "normies" are worthy of disdain:

Normies are midwits and their fascinations are simpler.

Even using the word "normie" instead of "normal" signals your disdain for them. Hobbies that would appeal to "normies" would never appeal to you, because despite being a triple-posting sped, you call them "midwits" as if you're better than them. At the same time, you're weirdly preoccupied with finding a hobby that makes it easier to fit in with them instead of just pursuing your own interests.

Basically, you need an attitude adjustment more than you need a hobby.

 

[Señora Airi]

I try grilling. Wow grilling these burgers feels a like like inhaling smoke while standing still for 30 minutes while someone else leans over my shoulder and tells me how he could do it better

Maybe try smoking meats. It's a lovely way to spend a day just at home, occasionally checking wood, and you end up with a delicious product.

Wow hunting feels like I took off time from work to wait in place for a defenseless creature to be defenseless before I kill it.

Most people who hunt are going to be using the animals for food and fur. It's more humane than what a lot of factory farmers do to the meats in the grocery stores.

 

[Agamemnon Busmalis]

Maybe try smoking meats. It's a lovely way to spend a day just at home, occasionally checking wood, and you end up with a delicious product.

Same with barbecue, low and slow means you don't need to hover over it.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

Does anyone else feel this way or have any stories. Or hell, dare I say, advice?

Get a creative hobby like playing guitar, drawing, writing, or making stuff (e.g. whittling).

All of the hobbies you listed have practical applications. You need something to do for shits and giggles.

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole 2]

Have you tried drinking beer while listening to rock? When I meet up with old, old friends that's always our favorite part of the day.

 

[Key the Metal Shitposter]

Have you ever tried trap shooting? In my experience the engagement is far higher than your standard range shooting.