Would she beat you for individualizing?
Would she dig her fingernails into your cheeks when you questioned her words?
Did you ever need to call the police to restrain her and have yourself removed from the house?
Would she strangle you with the phone cord when you called the police on her?
Did you ever think if you didn't kill her, she would kill you?
No down the board? Newsflash: My mother was immensely worse than yours; bear in mind, I skipped the emotional abuse that she doled out to everybody.
And you know something? That still hasn't stopped me from growing beyond it. Between her and the female teachers who ignored all the signs of abuse - like me telling them my mother beats me and pointing out all my fresh bruises - I had a massive distrust of women, romance, and marriage for a long time, and the abuse even left me catatonic for a while, but it's my past. I dig this up in therapy and when special little snowflakes like you think your mothers were abusive for being disciplinarians or not being involved enough, but otherwise it's just shit that used to happen and doesn't anymore. I'm still a work in progress, but I'm allowed in an out-patient program now and can interact with the world again. I'm still no social butterfly and I refuse to speak to my mother, but there's interaction between me and the world that doesn't involve me shooting nasty looks and being apathetic about the world.
Your mother yelled a lot. Compared to a narcissist with a middle child complex, I'd trade mothers with you in a heartbeat.