Incredibly Dumb and Annoying Suggestions Thread

[Acceptable]

We need a good pink theme. Background pink. Text pink. Links pink. I want this to feel like 2006 MySpace

 

[Table Country]

Ban Null

 

[trailcamwhore]

When you're thread-banned from a thread you've never posted in, the janny who did it should get a statistically deadly but not definitely deadly electric shock.

 

[Stabmaster Arson]

When you're thread-banned from a thread you've never posted in, the janny who did it should get a statistically deadly but not definitely deadly electric shock.

>being banned
>ever caring
>not ban evading.

This seems like more of a you problem.

 

[Enig]

A theme that stretches everything to your monitor's width limit as a stress test for ultrawide screens and a way to fuck with phone users on occasion

 

[Neko GF]

Kiwi Farms should capitalize on Roe V. Wade getting destroyed by starting an illegal abortionist ring.

 

[Info Neutral Agency]

A voice chat option should be created but only opened for a specific hour and with a time limit. If users access this voice chat between 3-4 AM in the morning in their timezone, they'll be met with the most ear-piercing, demonically autistic, and soul-corrupting entities known to man. After the time limit has broken, they get a 7-day ban for recovering from the auditory-induced trauma they went through.

Imagine it as Ghost from True Capitalist Radio tuning into his Capitalist Army Discord, but it sounds like a room full of tormented souls and demons. Both tell you to join them and break the last parts of your rational mind. If somehow a user who tuned in didn't break from the psychological torture, they'll still get the 7-day ban but come back as any other user on the Farms like it was Tuesday.

 

[Piss Bear]

I’m tired of reading people say “Imagine the smell” as a joke, it’s so overused. I suggest a text replacement whenever that string of words is used. Up to Null/community what the replacement would be.

 

[SPhobos]

Let us thumbs-up our own posts

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

Make Tommy A&N tranny janny.

 

[æsthetic fœticide]

Change "Null" to "My Gay Lover" so every time a hilarious and original kiwi posts to Q&A it will say:

Why is My Gay Lover such a Nazi?
My Gay Lover should be banned from this site!
etc

 

[cheese burger69]

I beg of you, please implement a better draft saving system into Sneedforo.

 

[5t3n0g0ph3r]

Have Twerking Crewmate as a "Smily."

 

[Lichen Bark]

There should be a 1 in 10 million chance that anything with a hyperlink will instead direct the unlucky user to a screamer lolcow image, with sound. Every sub-forum has an original themed screamer that would have a very tiny chance of playing depending on where the user is browsing.

 

[Alligator Alcatraz]

A reaction sticker of a baby bottle for users with severe Mommy/Daddy issues.

 

[StrawberryDouche]

There should be a counter of all black posts, and whitey should not be allowed to post until an equal post has been made by a black man. In fact, in the name of racial equality and reparations, it should be two black posts per one whitey post.

Disagree. A black man's sticker should only be worth 3⁄5 a white man's.

 

[Microlab]

A soundclip of Chris screaming plays across the whole site every time a post is made to the CWC subforum.

Open A&H to guest users, except their IPs are publicly visible.

Every 6 months, randomly swap the usernames of every account on the site, for MAXIMUM INFOSEC.

Anonymously disperse fliers in middleschools.

 

[AnOminous]

We should have an entire new row of reacts entirely based on Pokemon memes. And new rows for train memes, Sonic memes, pony memes, Bionicle memes, and every other imaginable form of autism.

 

[Doji]

Nitro for kiwifarms, you pay to use your own custom stickers.

Call it Autistro.

 

[Mountain Gorilla]

please no more apes on the board.. this is not hard to implement and will save lives