J.K. Rowling needs to stop messing with Harry Potter - A general STFU J.K. Rowling MegaThread <3

[Faggot Gift]

Not to mention his estate is hardcore conservative and militant about who and how his IP is presented. Although it will be a dark day indeed when the SJW's run out of shit to REE about and turn their focus on LOTR for it's Cis normative story that excludes trans hobbits.

Lol don't get too optimistic fucking Amazon is making a LOTR series. From the same luminaries as Transparent, the Man in the High Castle, and Mozart in the Jungle

 

[BScCollateral]

Never was a Potter fan, but "don't screw with your work after publication" is a very needed lesson.

 

[MembersSchoolPizza]

Another reason why Tolkien's work is infinitely superior in every way

He had the common courtesy to die before he thought of changing his works years after they were published

Actually he tinkered with his world constantly until he died, if you read his letters and such. But mostly in small, minor ways. And he didn't have Twitter to twoot his every thunk to his audience real-time, either.

*edit* Derp, was beaten to the punch. Curse, you, Judge Holden!

 

[Judge Holden]

Lol don't get too optimistic fucking Amazon is making a LOTR series. From the same luminaries as Transparent, the Man in the High Castle, and Mozart in the Jungle

We really should start a betting ring as to what characters get niggerfied/wammenized/faggoted

Gandalf : high probability of going black
Frodo : DEFINITELY made a faggot
Sam : see above....and probably black/brown which will stir some REEE outrage because hes Frodo's servant
Merry : if frodo/sam are not made gay, Merry and Pippin will definitely be
Pippin : see above...if not will be made a wammen
Aragorn: nigger. definitely made a nigger.
Boromir: will remain a FFFFFFFFUCKING WHITE MAAALE because he is the closest the fellowship has to a "bad" character. his antipathy for aragorn will be because muh racism
Legolas: brown bi womyn of color. this will be the character made specifically for tumblr
Gimli: will remain a FFFFUCKING WHITE MAAALE and his "lol silly comic sidekick" factor will be dialed up 1000% and all his competent and awesome moments will be given to brown womyn legolas

 

[neverendingmidi]

I wonder about J.K. Rowling as a young adult. All this desperate changing and tweaking makes it seem like she was always changing, trying to be the most popular. And she finally hit that point, she had bestselling books, multimillion dollar movies, a themepark attraction, everything... And yet it's not enough, she wants to stay at that peak forevermore, rather than enjoy what she's made.

If I had the stupid levels of money she's made I'd be touring the world, seeing new sights, resting up at my comfortable home, and occasionally (yet randomly) appearing at cons to enjoy the fame a bit before disappearing again.

 

[Positron]

Aragorn: nigger. definitely made a nigger.

Aragon is a ronin Jap. Fight me.
Saruman is a Chink addicted to Shire-imported opium.

Gandalf : high probability of going black

Gandalf is a bumbling white male returning as a sassy, empowered black woman.

 

[Absolutego]

Not to mention his estate is hardcore conservative and militant about who and how his IP is presented. Although it will be a dark day indeed when the SJW's run out of shit to REE about and turn their focus on LOTR for it's Cis normative story that excludes trans hobbits.

That was the case so long as his son Christopher was in charge of it. Now that he's out of the picture suddenly Amazon got the license to make a LOTR series. You will live to see Tolkein's world corrupted by modern politics, rest assured.

 

[MembersSchoolPizza]

Aragon is a ronin Jap. Fight me.

I read that fanfic. I believe it was called "The Wheel of Time", or something like that.

 

[BatNapalm]

Lol don't get too optimistic fucking Amazon is making a LOTR series. From the same luminaries as Transparent, the Man in the High Castle, and Mozart in the Jungle

And let us not forget that PKD Electric Dreams anthology that also sucked a cock.

At least someone at Amazon had the good sense to bin their idea for a Conan series, thank fuck.

 

[BScCollateral]

You will live to see Tolkein's world corrupted by modern politics, rest assured.

I hope they include Where There's a Whip There's a Way.

 

[MembersSchoolPizza]

I hope they include Where There's a Whip There's a Way.

Hey now. The Rankin-Bass musicals are basically the keystone of my childhood.

 

[HG 400]

Another reason why Tolkien's work is infinitely superior in every way

Yes because you're comparing it to Harry Potter but Tolkein is also shit and his books are garbage.

 

[Graffiti canvas]

Lol don't get too optimistic fucking Amazon is making a LOTR series. From the same luminaries as Transparent, the Man in the High Castle, and Mozart in the Jungle

Thankfully, this will take place outside of the cannon LOTR story. So hopefully any inclusive shoehorning will be forgotten and dismissed when the series shits the bed. The whole concept gives me a cringe feeling simply because at this point, Middle Earth is just getting milked for money.

LOTR was told on screen and it was done masterfully. The Hobbit was told on screen, and it was hamfisted and pale in comparison, even to the original 1977 animated version. I've no reason to believe this downward spiral won't continue.

Aragorn: nigger. definitely made a nigger.

I hear Chadwick Bosemen is available.

 

[ZehnBoat]

Another reason why Tolkien's work is infinitely superior in every way

He had the common courtesy to die before he thought of changing his works years after they were published

tolkien had the smart idea of expanding with more stories instead of just sitting around and making up shit on stuff he already made then farting over to some public forum to announce shit no one cares about

If she can include a tutorial on how to pronounce “Hermione”

lol stupid bitch, i already knew how to say by the time the first book was out for a month. word spread really quickly about that.

 

[Edgeworth]

Telling Rowling that she needs to stop messing with Harry Potter is like telling a flea-bitten dog not to scratch; it looks like almost a compulsion at this rate because she's constantly backtracking and changing up the canon to please whatever loud group is bitching about it. She's gooootta stay relevant or else she'll be rich and people will like her books as they are and everyone will be happy-- wait, I'm confused, what are we talking about, again?

Sad Kotaku writer, if you want all this inclusive stuff, just pay attention to Fantastic Beasts (which to be fair, was released and touched up on after this whole "Oh JK Rowling is sooo progressive now you guys" stuff)

:autism: You want Jewish? In Fantastic Beasts, Tina and Queenie are implied to be Jewish(if only through their last name) and they have to hide their identities from the population under penalty of discovery and punishment. There, WWII symbolism acknowledged and moving on. Newt is autistic or something because eye contact is hard and animals are so much nicer than people, Credence is a triple whammy dealing with all the poor abuse survivors, encapsulating teen angst (and how SUPER POWERFUL teen angst can be) AND people thinking the Obscurus is symbolism for being gay and having to hide your gayness. Jacob, I dunno, can be an allegory for the developmentally disabled because he's out of his element. ...that last one's a stretch but you get the point. :autism:

OR... you could just be someone who acknowledges that the books were something you grew up with and enjoyed and remember them as such instead of getting mad about shit that doesn't matter. JK Rowling is stupid (yes, actually, Hermione's skin tone WAS directly mentioned in the third book but ahhh who's keeping track), let's all know this and move on.

Also it's no one else's fault that you got a tattoo that you regret. Don't try to pin that on someone else because you retroactively realise that the person that made the damn symbol's a whacko.

 

[BScCollateral]

Hey now. The Rankin-Bass musicals are basically the keystone of my childhood.

They were a generation's Fall of the Berlin Wall.

 

[frozenrunner]

Lol don't get too optimistic fucking Amazon is making a LOTR series. From the same luminaries as Transparent, the Man in the High Castle, and Mozart in the Jungle

What's wrong with The Man in the High Castle? I haven't seen the third season yet, but the first two were pretty damn good. And I didn't notice any progressive faggotry.

And let us not forget that PKD Electric Dreams anthology that also sucked a cock

Aww, come on now. There were some solid episodes in the season.

 

[Judge Holden]

I hope they include Where There's a Whip There's a Way.

Oh goddamn it you reminded me this song exists now its stuck in my head once again

Fucking hell imma have to listen to a bunch of animeee music to get this shit out of my skull

 

[Safir]

Seriously, though, I'm starting to feel like I was the only one reading non-fiction stuff growing up and/or fiction like the Chronicles of Prydain -- which regrettably I've forgotten a great deal about.

Good for you. I read Prydain as an adult. It sucked.

But that's the point. Children's literature is not all-ages and it shouldn't try to be. Timelessness can't be forced. Harry Potter is serviceable lowbrow children's entertainment. It should not be a theme for tattoos because you have to grow out of it by the time you can get inked. It should not be a lens through which to view modern politics. It should not be a vehicle for incel Catholics in bathrobes to get over their estranged wives' gay porn fetish.

 

[Duncan Hills Coffee]

As someone else who grew up reading the books too, it bothers me somewhat that people just will not let the series go well into adulthood. I loved the books too, but when I was finished with them I moved onto something else. You know what the first book I got into was after I finished Harry Potter? Lord of the Rings. Which was then followed by Game of Thrones. I moved on to other stuff, and some of that stuff, namely Lord of the Rings, I maintained an appreciation for even after I became an adult.

To this Kotaku writer's credit, they are talking about all the pointless additions that add absolutely nothing. I don't remember Grindewald at all in the original books, and I don't understand why the new stuff focuses so much on a character that, in the grand scheme of things, affects nothing in the overall story. And they also acknowledge the pointlessly tacked on diversity that adds nothing to the characters. It still bothers me though that they admit to be approaching their 30s and are still a Harry Potter fan, and that it seems likely that there hasn't been any other book that struck their fancy in all that time,