Joshua 'Null' Moon went to my Elementary School - Null back in first grade

[Space_Dandy]

Little Josh went to the same school as me in kindergarten and first grade. We didn't interact much, but he was pretty athletic back then and liked to hang around the other jocks (if you could call a first grader a jock), always playing basketball during recess. I was more of a loser with my two friends playing action figures and Power Rangers during recess.

One time I went to the bathroom and he followed in behind me. I'm not sure what got into him but he pushed me into the toilet and started trying to shove my head into the toilet. I pushed back with all my might but I found myself slipping down further. I had never heard of a 'swirlie' before but he had apparently. Another kid came in behind him and was trying to push my feet forward, so I was trying to kick my feet away from him at the same time. I guess he gave up because I never ended up getting that swirlie. I told the teachers about what happened, but there wasn't any evidence of it and I wasn't actually wet, so I don't think they did anything. Josh was the embodiment, the final boss, of bullies in my mind for years after that.

Unrelated, but I would change schools after that year.

I would next see him in 7th grade when I changed schools again. At first I almost didn't believe it, could it really be that same Josh who I vilified all those years ago? He seemed so nice now. Although we still didn't have much to do with each other, I never knew of him bullying anyone and was completely pleasant the few interactions we had. Eventually I asked him about the event in 1st grade. He said he didn't know why he did it but that he was sorry. The second boy was also in this school district and I would later ask him too. He simply said that he hadn't decided if he was going to pull me away from Josh, or push me further in. I guess my suspicion that he wasn't going to help me was likely true.

So I guess none of us know why I almost got a swirlie that day. No hard feelings though, that was a long time ago. Least you could do is unban my other account for what you almost did to me though. I mean what kind of asshole puts someone's head in the toilet? I didn't do a damn thing to you. Fuck you. Have a good day, I still love you, I guess, asshole.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

He was just trying to feed you toilet water.

 

[Johnny Salami]

He thought you were Indian

 

[HarveyMCR]

Fake. Josh Moon was home schooled and wasn’t privileged enough to see a toilet until he was a grown man

 

[MrTroll]

Nice try, but it's a well-known fact that Florida schools don't have running water.

 

[lemonsensei]

Jersh was just preparing you for the horrors of adulthood. He practically saved your life if you think about it.

 

[Rome's rightful successor]

Can you prove it?

 

[Dumb Bitch Smoothie]

People in Florida go to school? I thought the children got sent to FCAT labor camps.

 

[Jewthulhu]

I saw Null at a grocery store in Serbia yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

 

[20 Mule Team Lorax]

same thing happened to me

 

[CAPTAIN HAPPY]

I thought Null was black.

 

[Fascist Frederick]

Null called me a "dumb motherfucker" once, actual true story.

 

[Anal Eclipse]

I met Null at Bronycon. He was very friendly and gave me gas money and a hug.

 

[BridgeTroll]

I met null in Moscow. When I greeted him he kept saying senseless Russian words pretending to not speak English. He kicked a pigeon and ran away.

 

[The Cunting Death]

I saw Null at a grocery store in Serbia yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

will never not be funny

 

[Ted Kaczynski]

He was just trying to feed you toilet water.

Le feeder

OP did you jerk off while writing this?

 

[Manul Otocolobus]

We all know that Jersh is a myth meant to scare children. Like the Easter Bunny, & Rudy Giuliani.

 

[Tom Myers]

Joshua Connor Moon raped a killed a kid behind an Arby's in 1999. Source: we ate at the same Arby's in Pensacola.

He also ate an Arby's roast beef sandwich from the dumpster.

 

[Queen Elizabeth II]

I met Joshua Moon when he broke into my bedroom shortly after the birth of Christ.

He called me old and told me to git gud.

It still lubricates the sewers.

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

Null thought I was British, lol. But srsly, in general chat I made some passing comment that something in the UK at least wasn’t as bad as France. I did not know his seething hatred of the Eternal Anglo at the time. I guess me saying something in the UK is better than in France means I’m British. He made several rage posts, I diffused the situation (explaining I’m very much an Amerimutt), then mentioned this is the first time we interacted, and he said “hi”.