Karl Jobst / karljobst / FAQ_GOD / simthreat / approachhernow.com - Albino autist, Spergy speed runner, Pickup predator and Bitch of Mitchell

  • 🐕 Maintenace complete. Database is on a new RAID. Everything should load faster. Will optimize more over time.
Screenshot_1011.webp ( X / A )
 
  • Like
  • DRINK!
  • Winner
Reactions: Pepper Jack, somevan712, deeman and 17 others
clever handle said:
karl jobst and billy mitchell are the gayest motherfuckers on the planet, no well-adjusted person spends this much time thinking about another man unless he really wants to know just how many directions his red ball-top joystick can simultaneously move in
Click to expand...
I mean, if I could get a fat court payout, paid for vacations and an explosion of sales for my family business, I too would obsess over an albino nigger.
 
  • Like
  • Agree
  • Feels
Reactions: somevan712, Frog The Dry Socket, OJ Simpson and 13 others
clever handle said:
karl jobst and billy mitchell are the gayest motherfuckers on the planet, no well-adjusted person spends this much time thinking about another man unless he really wants to know just how many directions his red ball-top joystick can simultaneously move in
Click to expand...
Billy is just practicing the golden rule. Karl spent years obsessed with Billy so now Billy is doing it right back. The difference is Billy is actually getting something out of it.
 
  • Like
  • Agree
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: somevan712, Frog The Dry Socket, deeman and 11 others
Yaks said:
At least Karl can add "set a substantial legal precedent in Australia" to his resume now instead of just speed running world records.
Click to expand...
I'd imagine if he grinds hard enough he could get the "Put The Fries In The Bag" any% world record, too. Although he would need to get the perfect Salt RNG.

Then the manager will come in and pat him for doing a great job while he's crying over his new WR.

(fucking autocorrect)
 
  • Like
  • Optimistic
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: Frog The Dry Socket, Nevar Evar, Catch The Rainbow and 2 others
Question Humanity said:
I'd imagine if he grinds hard enough he could get the "Put The Fries In The Bag" any% world record, too. Although he would need to get the perfect Salt RNG.

Then the manager will come in and pat him for doing a great job while he's crying over his new WR.

(fucking autocorrect)
Click to expand...
Happy Meal WR 100% Smile-assisted (Glitches used: toyselect, saltflick, bagfry-manip)
 
  • Like
  • Semper Fidelis
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Frog The Dry Socket, Maximum Girl, BoJiden69 and 3 others
clever handle said:
karl jobst and billy mitchell are the gayest motherfuckers on the planet, no well-adjusted person spends this much time thinking about another man unless he really wants to know just how many directions his red ball-top joystick can simultaneously move in
Click to expand...
in another world; lovers.
here; bitter rivals.
they'll never stop obsessing over eachother.
 
  • Like
  • Winner
  • Feels
Reactions: Digital Thunder, Frog The Dry Socket, ANF and 7 others
Spooky Dogwood said:
Judging from his last 2 videos I think it's safe to say that even his cheater expose videos are getting about half the views they used to. Still a big channel, but it's going to take twice as long for Billy to get his money at this rate.
Click to expand...
I would bet it is going to be a Jim Sterling bleed out than a mass unsub. His loss is not as explosive as say sex allegations, it is just everyone does not want the stink of a loser around them. He is just going to slowly lose viewers as more and more people back away slowly. Charlie and Pootahar i would bet have told him they wont publicly colab or shout him out anymore, but went full on asshurt hugbox with him in DMs.
He will just become less and less relevant until he is a ghost.
Ertaz_catz will move on to find another self righteous asshole he can rile up to go after Billy.
Karl will just be left with a family on the edge of destitution and a legal bill.
This whole case has made me realise how much of the internet has these self made rules, that has no real effect on real life and sound batshit to anyone in the real word.
To a normal person, ranting about how the color of a joystick matters and proves he murdered Apollo Legend via lawsuits. Seems so schizo to any normie.
Not just in a legal sense. But as a logical one that any normie could think of.
Perhaps they don't produce the parts for these machines, they were made in the 1980s and so have to be replaced with cheap chinessium knock offs.
It is a simple and good explanation. But no, according to the council of sped grand wizard Ertaz_catz here. Billy dragon clearly fitted up the machine himself to be a cheating cheater who cheats.
From Billy's own history as i have been able to read. He is not a hardware or software guy. He is just a player, who had the reaction speed to be good at DK.
Going by his livestreams, he clearly has speedrunner skills on DK.
But it is quite clear that no amount of evidence in Billy's favour, is enough to convince Ertaz_Catz, Karl or anyone on the losing side here. They are too emotionally entrenched.
It is why they having to pin body's on his name.
 
  • Like
  • DRINK!
  • Winner
Reactions: Frog The Dry Socket, Beardless Lenin, schwrz and 4 others
For Scorn and Three Birds said:
He will just become less and less relevant until he is a ghost.
Click to expand...
He is literally one already.
But yes, I imagine his social life also took a hit. He can't stand showing his face in his videos anymore, admitted to mostly lying around and being sorry for himself during his free time so even less incentive for him to go outside, can't even post his usual creepy shit in a public Discord anymore because he knows he is gonna get laughed at. Hard times ahead for him and his wife and child who are unfortunate enough to be around him all the time.
 
  • Like
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: I_Lurk_Here and demicolon
DerelictOnion said:
But yes, I imagine his social life also took a hit.
Click to expand...
What social life? He made it clear in one of his videos that he thinks playing a single level of a video game 70,000 times to grind out the RNG needed to save a few frames and clench a new world record is a great way to spend your time. (And by "playing" he means starting the level, playing until bad RNG and small errors put you far enough behind world-record pace that you can't hope to make up enough time to recover, and then restarting the level to try again. Repeat hundreds of times per day until you become an Absolute Legend™ and/or AN HERO.)
 
  • Like
  • Feels
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: Frog The Dry Socket, Marketable Bootleg, I_Lurk_Here and 1 other person
Unimaginative Username said:
playing until bad RNG and small errors put you far enough behind world-record pace that you can't hope to make up enough time to recover
Click to expand...
This sort of shit is what gets my goat most of all in speedrunning. Putting aside the value or lack thereof of speedrunning and its lack of meaningful commitment to the GDP, nothing is more pathetic to me than speedruns that are high on RNG. I absolutely cannot imagine what the brainspace must be of people who are willing to throw half hours or more at a chance to see a computer to run a in-in-4096 dice roll to determine whether or not your run is even viable.

There's zero skill expression in that, and communities not just agreeing to automatically seed the RNG in those cases is basically just several hundred people agreeing that their time has less than no value. These people are doing nothing but playing slots and seeing who has the most free time. In the face of that, I completely understand why the Minecraft speedrunners Jobst makes his career off the back from feel compelled to cheat with static worlds and shit like that.
 
  • Like
  • Agree
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: Sped Bundy, somevan712, Frog The Dry Socket and 7 others
clever handle said:
This sort of shit is what gets my goat most of all in speedrunning. Putting aside the value or lack thereof of speedrunning and its lack of meaningful commitment to the GDP, nothing is more pathetic to me than speedruns that are high on RNG. I absolutely cannot imagine what the brainspace must be of people who are willing to throw half hours or more at a chance to see a computer to run a in-in-4096 dice roll to determine whether or not your run is even viable.
Click to expand...
That's why this is easily one of the best parodies of speedrunning: The strategy evolves from using skill and knowledge of obscure mechanics to cheese a faster time, to just taking the shortest path and hoping for good RNG that makes the enemies move out of your way, to finally just using an exploit to instantly win.

 
  • Winner
  • Like
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: SenseDemons, Digital Thunder, Perverted Monk and 16 others
Unimaginative Username said:
That's why this is easily one of the best parodies of speedrunning: The strategy evolves from using skill and knowledge of obscure mechanics to cheese a faster time, to just taking the shortest path and hoping for good RNG that makes the enemies move out of your way, to finally just using an exploit to instantly win.

Click to expand...
Those speedurunning names area terrific! KingFuckHead back on top!
 
  • Agree
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: Frog The Dry Socket and demicolon
Unimaginative Username said:
What social life? He made it clear in one of his videos that he thinks playing a single level of a video game 70,000 times to grind out the RNG needed to save a few frames and clench a new world record is a great way to spend your time. (And by "playing" he means starting the level, playing until bad RNG and small errors put you far enough behind world-record pace that you can't hope to make up enough time to recover, and then restarting the level to try again. Repeat hundreds of times per day until you become an Absolute Legend™ and/or AN HERO.)
Click to expand...
It's funny how a few public statements is the difference between "I live a simple life with my wife, child, and appreciate the fans who enable me to stream and make content" and "I have NO bitches NO hot sauce NO rizz and I am BROKE!". There's plenty of wealthy people who have nothing in life but work, sleep and family, and that's fine cause they're not trying to start a career towards millions of followers.

Had he not been such a loudmouth, he could probably just keep making videos and not take much of a hit.
 
  • Like
  • Semper Fidelis
Reactions: Frog The Dry Socket, demicolon and I_Lurk_Here
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back