Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

[Cougar Pump]

Okay seriously, I need a brewing autist to help me figure out this vinegar mead thing. I know that some mead can turn sour and come out tasting like vinegar because of bacteria, and I know certain acids can be added after fermentation process to balance it out, but what is going to happen with that much vinegar right from the start?

I'm expecting the yeast will simply die and the whole thing won't ferment. At the same time, I don't see anything that's going to restrict mold formation and a bunch of stuff in there that'll kick start it so expect that to bloom on the surface within about a week.
I'd be happy to be proved wrong, so lets see I guess. If it does go this way and there's a thick layer of mold on the surface, surely cobes will just pour it...

 

[barrow greeter]

cookie-yuck mead update 10/22

how thoughtful for cobes to leave that pizza out for a week so the chair bugs can get their 'za on

 

[Xenomorph]

I’d love to see Cobes take on a Bloody Mary. The things he’d do to ruin an otherwise enjoyable cocktail. I imagine it’d be tomato juice with three different kinds of ketchup added, maybe substitute the juice for a jar of ragu cos TWU. Crush up some Doritos and stir them through, but that goes without saying. Substitute Tabasco and Worcestershire sauce for ghost pepper sauce, jalapeños and franks red hot. Serve in a punch bowl with a full bottle of vodka.

Then sit back and wait for homeboy cheddar to be subject to a taste test.

It would be Roasted Garlic Pramashawn Prego and whatever hard shit he had on hand and a metric fuckton of hot sauce

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

How does he avoid food poisoning? I once was bed ridden for days after consuming some feta cheese that was kept at slightly too high a temprature, Cobe on the other hand drinks gallons of cultivated bacteria and shows no signs of nausea? I wonder if he shares a bloodline with that Tavarae guy from France that could eat a whole dead and festering cat etc....

All of the shit he dumps into his batches of jenkem are high in preservatives/salt, and even the raw fruit is being mixed with other food items that are. Raw fruit is pretty low risk to get you sick as well, especially stuff bought from a grocery store which is usually pre-washed/waxed/or contained in a peel.

Plus, bottom line is he doesn't let this stuff sit long enough. He can't help himself and drinks these foul concoctions mere hours later because his account is negative and he has no booze. He's far more likely to get sick from the food he leaves out on the counter for the roaches for days at a time. If he does get sick from his jenkem I would bet money it'll be because he sipped from it with his asshole of a mouth, or strained it with his shit smeared fingers. The stuff he's using as ingredients ironically gives him a good chance of avoiding getting sick.

 

[SpiceyHuman]

cookie-yuck mead update 10/22

View attachment 5437795

how thoughtful for cobes to leave that pizza out for a week so the chair bugs can get their 'za on

Im becoming so triggered when he shakes the yeast back in.

WHY is he doing that??? Thats not a thing. Thats not a step in brewing wine/beer/mead/ anything. No body does that. You let the yeast die, settle to the bottom, and the liquid becomes clear (in most case)

In Rome, wine was rationed out to everyone along with grain. It was considered a necessity, even to slaves.

The wine that was siphoned from the top had the highest clarity, and was given to the highest in society. As you got lower to the bottom where the yeast was, it was given to the lower levels of society.

The very, very bottom, the sludgy liquid siphoned just above the bottom of the jars contained tanins, dead yeast, and any residual junk. This was giving to slaves. It was still alcoholic, but allegedly was not palatable at all and was watered down and spiced.

Josh is literally drinking worst sludge than a Roman slave.

 

[Bogliacci]

cookie-yuck mead update 10/22

View attachment 5437795

how thoughtful for cobes to leave that pizza out for a week so the chair bugs can get their 'za on

Lmfao I love how he's already managed to wreck the the lid

 

[TMDWTFIU]

I almost brought this up in my last comment.

I can genuinely believe that some of his meads are legitimate attemps at home brew craft.

But some of these crazy off the wall boglim meads are just so nonsensical, I can't help but wonder if Josh is somehow clever enough to be doing them solely for the clickbait and views. I just don't know if he is that smart to be capable of such a thing.

Josh thinks there are 10 inches to a foot, as noted by him saying he's "Five foot nine, six feet.". So I think no.

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

But some of these crazy off the wall boglim meads are just so nonsensical, I can't help but wonder if Josh is somehow clever enough to be doing them solely for the clickbait and views. I just don't know if he is that smart to be capable of such a thing.

I think it may be his ego. He's an idiot, but he sees himself as a genius. "dood, I'm such a creative genius. No one would think adding jalapenos and cookies would mask such a tasty 'mead' toobz." He sees himself in such a bright light that he would believe his own piss would taste like ambrosa.

 

[Swamp_Donkey]

I'm expecting the yeast will simply die and the whole thing won't ferment. At the same time, I don't see anything that's going to restrict mold formation and a bunch of stuff in there that'll kick start it so expect that to bloom on the surface within about a week.
I'd be happy to be proved wrong, so lets see I guess. If it does go this way and there's a thick layer of mold on the surface, surely cobes will just pour it...

there is a strong possibility that he shakes it up before checking for mold….

 

[UncommonParlence]

Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
My attempt at the Boglim "Cookie Monster" Brew.

I followed the recipie exactly as Josh did, but by 1/4th the ingredients. I do not want a large batch of this vile concoction lingering in my home.

Some notes: I did it exactly as cobra did. This means I did not first dilute the honey in warm water in order to ensure an even mixture. I simply stires vigorously as he did. As a result, the honey just kept sinking back to the bottom.

Within about 5 minutes, everything began to curdle and seperate. I beleive this has to do with either the vinigar from the peppers, or the carbonation from the monster.

I used a hydrometer to calculate the potential alcobol, however, I was unable to get a true reading due to the carbonation from the monster causing the hydrometer to float up higher than it probably should have. It's stating there should be a 12% potential alcohol, but I doubt thats accurate. I think i should have used a flat Monster to gauge this accurately.

I WILL NOT BE TASTING THIS. I AM JUST SEEING IF THIS WILL YEILD ALCOHOL.

God help me.

Dude! I cannot believe how lucky we are to have you. Now when he drinks it and pretends to be drunk we'll have proof. Kiwis all over salute you, BOY!

 

[Steve Harwell's ghost]

Dude! I cannot believe how lucky we are to have you. Now when he drinks it and pretends to be drunk we'll have proof. Kiwis all over salute you, BOY!

Ackshully troll, she's an of age, alive, human cis female. That's the thing of it you *sexist trols didn't watch enough gender relashions videos buuuuuut, had you went back just one page you would see she says she has a bun in the oven. This would imply that she meets all of the requirements, I'm not trying anything just tellin it like it is.

I have a bun in the oven and can't risk the consumption of alcohol or giving my bebe a case of Bogulism. I will see if my husband is willing to volunteer as tribute and sacrifice for the curiosity of the Kiwis.

On a side note, right after making the Boglim Mead, I started a batch of proper hard cider. It should have the potential to be as high as 16% ABV but I'll rack it before then so it will retain more sweetness.

I think it will be intresting to see and compare how both batches do in terms of when the airlocks start bubbling, when they stop, and how the charity of the liquids look.

Congrats to you and yours on the not yet alive or of age child to be, fuck sicko. Circle of protection for your growing family TWU.

edit *sexist

 

[Eyesore City]

I have a bun in the oven and can't risk the consumption of alcohol or giving my bebe a case of Bogulism. I will see if my husband is willing to volunteer as tribute and sacrifice for the curiosity of the Kiwis.

Someone call the media.

Kiwifarms is about to have another death on its hands.

 

[RollingRock2]

Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!
My attempt at the Boglim "Cookie Monster" Brew.

I followed the recipie exactly as Josh did, but by 1/4th the ingredients. I do not want a large batch of this vile concoction lingering in my home.

Some notes: I did it exactly as cobra did. This means I did not first dilute the honey in warm water in order to ensure an even mixture. I simply stires vigorously as he did. As a result, the honey just kept sinking back to the bottom.

Within about 5 minutes, everything began to curdle and seperate. I beleive this has to do with either the vinigar from the peppers, or the carbonation from the monster.

I used a hydrometer to calculate the potential alcobol, however, I was unable to get a true reading due to the carbonation from the monster causing the hydrometer to float up higher than it probably should have. It's stating there should be a 12% potential alcohol, but I doubt thats accurate. I think i should have used a flat Monster to gauge this accurately.

I WILL NOT BE TASTING THIS. I AM JUST SEEING IF THIS WILL YEILD ALCOHOL.

God help me.

If it produces alcohol you could distill it into a Cobra Spirit

 

[NoodleFucker3000]

Dancing With The Stars of Casper 2023 the clint bogaloo
View attachment 5436593

All of this and Clint is probably silently seething that his retarded drunk boglim son is way more famous for doing nothing well and being a fuck up than Clint will ever be with a degree he worked for.

 

[Ponzo]

I wonder if he got a strike and can't stream because reddit fags reported his recent livestream

 

[UncommonParlence]

Ackshully troll, she's an of age, alive, human cis female. That's the thing of it you *sexist trols didn't watch enough gender relashions videos buuuuuut, had you went back just one page you would see she says she has a bun in the oven. This would imply that she meets all of the requirements, I'm not trying anything just tellin it like it is.


Congrats to you and yours on the not yet alive or of age child to be, fuck sicko. Circle of protection for your growing family TWU.

edit *sexist

Listen, trolle, you gate keeping gendered language is actual violence. When it comes to the boglim, to tell the truth, all trolles get the BOY. Better not whiteknight, BOY! Slaying trolles coming in nicely. Twu

 

[Yamamura]

Dude! I cannot believe how lucky we are to have you. Now when he drinks it and pretends to be drunk we'll have proof. Kiwis all over salute you, BOY!

I'm just thinking, what if he legitimately placebos himself into thinking that he's actually drunk and is just too stupid to realize that he's not really hammered.

 

[eaglesfan665]

I'm just thinking, what if he legitimately placebos himself into thinking that he's actually drunk and is just too stupid to realize that he's not really hammered.

someone should send him bottles of vodka filled with water

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

someone should send him bottles of vodka filled with water

One thing I found recently is when they make "Stage Booze" they have a few recipes apparently the one for Vodka is either just water on it's own and if they want to get a natural reaction they make it 50/50 water and white wine vinegar.

That would be interesting to see, josh try and get fucked off Water an Vinegar.

 

[Ran-chan]

Man that fucking cookie mead is unreal. I'm surprised he got an airlock too. I thought he was enjoying huffing the co2 out of the balloons. Anyway, godspeed Cobes, fuck the trolls, and keep on brewin'.