Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

  • 🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.
Generic Retard said:
Some alcoholics even develop cancer in their esophagus, now that's real shitty.
Or they get varicose veins in the esophagus, that can rupture and bleed them out.
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I know a guy this happened to. Cancer of the esophagus. Eventually he had a feeding tube installed as he couldn't eat and swallow. Last time I saw him years ago he was injecting straight rubbing alcohol/ hand sanitizer into his feeding tube to get drunk. Can't imagine he lived much longer.

Imagine Josh doing feeding tube hacks. Yesssssh.
 
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PsychoNerd054 said:
That's a pretty big waste, considering just how much food he makes. In the video where he shows how he makes nachos, he uses 8 eggs, and like 4 layers of cheese and porkrinds. I'm more surprised that he hasn't eaten that.
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Doesn't go to waste. He'll eat his monstrous "food hacks" over the course of a few days. He made his "dragons breath romen noodles" on Sept 3rd and drunk streamed himself still eating on them four days later. This was the day he fell asleep on stream, but Lenin Lime's magic came in with the a reupload. 4 days old ramen with Mountain Dew, crushed doritos, and all sorts of garbage.

He's managed to stay slim because he spreads a single meal out but he use to ride bike (weather permitting) and walked quite a bit. He also didn't drink as much beer as he does now and was in his 20s. Things are changing obviously. He's in his 30s, never leaves the house, and his pay pigs keep him rolling in cheap beer and doordash.
 
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TheGooGooMuck said:
Doesn't go to waste. He'll eat his monstrous "food hacks" over the course of a few days. He made his "dragons breath romen noodles" on Sept 3rd and drunk streamed himself still eating on them four days later. This was the day he fell asleep on stream, but Lenin Lime's magic came in with the a reupload. 4 days old ramen with Mountain Dew, crushed doritos, and all sorts of garbage.

He's managed to stay slim because he spreads a single meal out but he use to ride bike (weather permitting) and walked quite a bit. He also didn't drink as much beer as he does now and was in his 20s. Things are changing obviously. He's in his 30s, never leaves the house, and his pay pigs keep him rolling in cheap beer and doordash.
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I guess fattening up is better than developing Korsakoff Syndrome. We should start to worry once the money for food dries up and the liquid diet starts...
Cobra really doesn't need to get more retarded.
 
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A lot of alcoholics don't eat much or just in random binges because the extreme amount of liquid calories turns off the hunger signals in your brain. What he 100% needs to worry about is a fatty swollen liver. No matter how thin or fit he could be, daily alcohol use is going to produce that engorged pot belly. I predict it will be fully developed by age 35.
 
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Rumply4Skyn said:
You can see that he is slowly gaining weight. When he gets up and does his toddler stomp, you can see his shirt now presses against his stomach and it's the same when he sits. Calories in booze are fucking insane. Used to drink heavily and there are like 200-300 calories a shot... and he drinks the sugary shit mixed with more sugary shit. I'm surprised we are not yet in the Diabetes Saga.


His lathe is throwing some serious sawdust. Going to fuck his computer up eventually. At least he doesn't smoke indoors anymore, at least that we know of

No clue why you would wanna watch his joke videos. They are shitty clips of something he either stole or thinks is clever but is dumb as fuck. I refuse to give him the views
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What??? No. No shot of liquor has 200-300 calories. What bullshit is this? Most liquor has 80-110 calories per shot.
 
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Help me out. What exactly is it about Cobes that makes him so distinctly odd looking? For some reason this thought has been on my mind today and Im trying to pinpoint which facial features are whats giving him him that unique look. The biggest thing that stands out to me is the very think upper lip and flat wide philtrum.
 
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SpiceyHuman said:
Help me out. What exactly is it about Cobes that makes him so distinctly odd looking? For some reason this thought has been on my mind today and Im trying to pinpoint which facial features are whats giving him him that unique look. The biggest thing that stands out to me is the very think upper lip and flat wide philtrum.
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Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. He has a huge head with spaced out, lizard-like facial features. Since balding, the odd, gourd-like shape of the head itself is more and more apparent. In addition, he carries his body, with his oddly proportioned limbs against a slightly elongated torso, incredibly strangely (most frequently compared to a toddler waddling), which makes his entire frame come across almost like Frankenstein.

Oh and the mouth. I don't know if that's also a FAS sympton, but it opens and closes like a hand puppet.
 
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Umaibae said:
What??? No. No shot of liquor has 200-300 calories. What bullshit is this? Most liquor has 80-110 calories per shot.
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Yeah, I was wrong. No idea where that number came from.

I think he looks odd because he is retarded. Also possibly of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome as he checks a shit load of the blocks and his mother may have been alcoholic or druggie — I don’t know much about her
 
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SpiceyHuman said:
Help me out. What exactly is it about Cobes that makes him so distinctly odd looking? For some reason this thought has been on my mind today and Im trying to pinpoint which facial features are whats giving him him that unique look. The biggest thing that stands out to me is the very think upper lip and flat wide philtrum.
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I mean which facial features aren't goofy as fuck? Upturned nose, fucked up eyes, chipmunk cheeks, his odd lip shape/movements where he resembles an old black man....need I go on?
 
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snort beg snort said:
I just discovered this guy and wow. This is the first stream I've watched

When he pulled a guitar out of nowhere and started shredding I fucking died. This dude is a disaster
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Welcome aboard. Only of age, not related, alive, cis gendered, human, sti free trolls allowed. Enjoy your stay, Because there's no turning back now.
 
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snort beg snort said:
I just discovered this guy and wow. This is the first stream I've watched

When he pulled a guitar out of nowhere and started shredding I fucking died. This dude is a disaster
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The first six months are fun. Just binge the compilations and highlight videos.

Ohhh and It's a common theme (and one I fell for myself) to wanna discuss how to save this fucker. You won't be the first one to wanna talk about a Clintervention or Group Homes or Guardianships. It won't happen. Cobes don't want help, Clint is too weak to force it on the drunk, and the state really can't kidnap him to a group home.

How did you find Cobes? Been a lot more people lately and I think it was TikTok? I hope he doesn't actually blow up on TikTok. I think more attention for him is the worst thing. I enjoy him getting more fucked up as paypigs pack his account but really don't want YouTube to look too closely at him. He is always riding the edge with his new retard talk about needing 'Lolis', followed by two-hour talks about children and killing 'Chimos'. I know you can get away with a lot but he is getting more sloppy and has started dropping 'faggot'. I don't give a fuck but Youtube would come after him for 'hate speech' -- whatever the fuck that is nowadays.
 
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