Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

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bonified retard said:
I tried to recreate this pizza on pizza hut's website, and it got to $41.79 before fees (using his location), and it wouldn't let me add the last 2 toppings (slow roasted ham, seasoned pork) because it maxes out at 10. This pizza probably cost him around 60-70 bucks once the other toppings, delivery fee, and doordash upcharges were added. TWU single liiiiiiife.


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They tried to tell him but he's too stupid to see it!
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The boy is flaunting his wealth for a future mate already
 
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So I fed Cobes's current situation into a songwriting AI...
[Verse]
In the shadows late at night
Gothic cowboy wizard’s fight
Bog hag whispers in the air
But he’s a spellcaster rare

[Verse 2]
Hat pulled low his wand held tight
Moonlit way he brings the light
Swirling magic sparks ignite
Chasing shadows taking flight

[Chorus]
Banished her back
To the tub where she’s trapped
Waves of water
Magic slaughter

[Verse 3]
Ancient words he spoke aloud
Thunder rumbled clear and proud
Bog hag’s cackle turned to scream
Nightmare faded like a dream

[Verse 4]
Outlaw in a mystic coat
Words that edged like a sharpened moat
Stars reflected in his gaze
Casting out the witch’s haze

[Bridge]
Whispered winds carry his name
In legend and song his claim
Gothic cowboy magic bound
Banishing evil unseen found.
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:story:
 
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Xenomorph said:
I dont care how optimistic you are you don't come out of a breakup with someone with BPD and come out clean...she's not gonna stop till she either gets him back or sees him destroyed.
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'Eh, she tried to pull out the whole physical and sexual abuse big guns and she's failed. What else is she gonna do? She showed her hand too soon. This is a lesson on why maintaining a healthy lifestyle and healing your mental health is so important: If ya don't, you turn less creditable because you're just a crazy, lying fucking cunt that no one wants to help.
 
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Xenomorph said:
I dont care how optimistic you are you don't come out of a breakup with someone with BPD and come out clean...she's not gonna stop till she either gets him back or sees him destroyed.
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yeah but most men are not able to pull from the Chad Spirits like the boy is. Remember Summer? drop kicked that bitch to the streets, didnt even flinch when she begged him to not make her homeless.

She can say what she likes, the Dark Lord has a cult of fans that will protect him. TMDWU!
 
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whogoesthere said:
yeah but most men are not able to pull from the Chad Spirits like the boy is. Remember Summer? drop kicked that bitch to the streets, didnt even flinch when she begged him to not make her homeless.

She can say what she likes, the Dark Lord has a cult of fans that will protect him. TMDWU!
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That wasn’t Summer, that was Amy. Your point still stands though, the BOY can be quite the chad.
 
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Xenomorph said:
I dont care how optimistic you are you don't come out of a breakup with someone with BPD and come out clean...she's not gonna stop till she either gets him back or sees him destroyed.
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They are not broken up until she decides it’s over. That or it was really her idea all along. I feel bad for Josh cause she is blasting private messages between them online. She is messy.
 
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Xenomorph said:
I dont care how optimistic you are you don't come out of a breakup with someone with BPD and come out clean...she's not gonna stop till she either gets him back or sees him destroyed.
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Him celebrating his freedom yesterday feels like the calm before the storm. Only this storm wasn't one he conjured with his wand.
 
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Takoyaki.86 said:
That wasn’t Summer, that was Amy. Your point still stands though, the BOY can be quite the chad.
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Amy was the one who said "maybe i should just kill myself" via text only for Josh to agree with her.
In fairness, Amy was also a single mom with meth mouth. Should've kept her teeth, she might've gotten a discount on exorcisms.
 
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bonified retard said:
She kind of implied it already.
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Yea, that's fake as fuck. Josh has made some fucked up comments in the past, but nothing leads me to believe anything from her story. It's also rich coming from an actual BPDemon who in all likelihood has laid hands on the boy, and at the very least has made documented threats already. That being said, the chatterbait story is 100% real lmfao.
 
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UncommonParlence said:
Are we talking about Saunders? You say SAUNDERS is too proud? If you'd said bog hag's hubris would destroy her I'd agree. But Josh Saunders, based King, DESERVES to be proud after destroying hagraven. Don't presume to criticize our BOY! on this blessed hag free day. Good day sir or madam. I said GOOD DAY!
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You're right, I was irrationally angry at something else. I was briefly MATI, I apologize and concede, good sir. I think the massive change from the protection of a cave-like apartment to a white-walled trailer with windows all over is activating my autism.
 
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Mushroom King said:
The hubris of this creature compels me to see it's demise. I am so tired of arrogant, dirty finger, sweaty Josh. I see now why Bitesize quit because Josh has become so filthy inside and out, but I also see now why he came back, a crow circling a corpse, nothing to be mad about. It's just nature taking it's course. I hope Bitesize squeezes a few more dozens of thousands out of this grease ball, he is so fucking vile.
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Bitesized didn't quit he now does longform documentary videos instead of highlights.
 
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