Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.


Here's his streams from yesterday:
Start:
- chillin with homeboy Alex Campbell
- making his not your fathers root beer float drink combo
- #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement
6:47:
- makes a float for himself
13:15:
- Kobes and Alex know what the stock market is they aren't stupid
16:30:
- $19 in his PayPal. Instant transfer TWU
- Talking about his root beer float
- Kobes Ozzy shirt is unisex
- Reading texts
- says he's ignoring his phone while doing streams
20:09:
- getting an Internet cable so he can play GTA5 online
- reads chat
- Keeps checking on Warlord because chat keeps saying he's stealing, picking his scabs and smoking crack
Start:
- Talking about the gamestop stock market shenanigans
- not your fathers root beer float drink combo
- Sydney Watson video response
6:38:
- explains what the stock market is
9:30:
- Don't forget the chocolate syrup garnish
- Fat kids dream in a cup
11:35:
- Starts the video
- Stops the video to compare himself to the devil and complain about trolls
- His big fish lips are good for sucking of age pussy
- He doesn't invest in the stock market because its like gambling
- Casino scenario
16:34:
- double standards in celebrity crushes
- double standards in being fat
- kobes feels like Dexter laboratory with his drink combinations
- Talks about Dexter laboratory
22:40:
- Back to the video
- Joe Biden is old jokes
- Republican rant
- Talks about his drink combo
26:34:
- Rant about Kamala Harris and immigrants
- Immigrants need to learn English
- Tranny in Dept of health
- Compares trannys to aliens
- Rant about lgbt
- people have a right to be grossed out by trannys
35:00:
- watching the ads on the video
37:30:
- rant about Redditors
- David and Goalie-oth
- Explains the stock market using reddit alcoholics Scenario
43:00:
- Re-occupy wallstreet 1% rant
- makes another drink
50:40:
- Googles hedge funds and read the definition. Doesn't understand it
- parrots whats said in the video
55:00:
- intense bottle cap pop
- making his drink combo
- might do a cooking video tomorrow
- might clip his toenails after the stream
- back to the video
1:00:54:
- 1% rant
- snooty fast food restaurant scenario
- compares stock market to body positivity movement
1:11:00:
- Trump rant
1:13:00:
- Obama and Clinton impressions
- Hilary Clinton jokes
- making fun of Sarah Palins down syndrome child
1:17:45:
- Back to the video
- That 70s show theme song vocal cover
- Trump rant
1:24:10:
- reads whats written on the screen
- Parrots whats said in the video
- rant about society and gender relations
134:48:
- coof conspiracy rant
- Valebtines day is shitty rant
1:39:40:
- Gives relationship advice
- Valentines day scenario
1:45:18:
- Back to the video
- reads whats written on the screen
- pretty sweet mlk jr got an interview with playboy
- MLK story
- racism
1:51:00:
- Hair is racist rant
- Hugh Heffner was a feminist
- Flicks through his Playboy
1:55:18:
- back to the video
- parrots whats said in the video
- rant about YouTube
2:00:00:
- reads whats written on the screen
- rant about YouTube
- Parrots whats said in the video
2:09:38:
- Trumps white dog wasn't racist
- reads Biden dog tweets
- Back to the video
2:14:48:
- parrots whats said in the video
- rant about politics in businesses
- Democrats are hypocrites
2:17:00:
- Stock market is stupid
- Google who the white house press Secretary is
2:21:10:
- rant about clean drinking water
- What Kobes would do if he was president
- legalise weed and use tax revenue to fund universal health care
- people can print guns at home
- gun control
- AR15s
 
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Biting from the sub. His pathetic hair is upsetting to look at. He looked horrendous as a bald man years ago but this reminds me of a sick person.

www.reddit.com

r/kingcobrajfs - HARDCORE!!!!!!!!!

159 votes and 70 comments so far on Reddit
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1612070504261.png


Even this looks much better, though it predates his significant increase in facial bloat so who knows if it'd be an improvement at this rate.
1612070614352.png
 
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KillThemCrackasBabies said:
Biting from the sub. His pathetic hair is upsetting to look at. He looked horrendous as a bald man years ago but this reminds me of a sick person.

www.reddit.com

r/kingcobrajfs - HARDCORE!!!!!!!!!

159 votes and 70 comments so far on Reddit
www.reddit.com www.reddit.com

View attachment 1884541

Even this looks much better, though it predates his significant increase in facial bloat so who knows if it'd be an improvement at this rate.
View attachment 1884545
Click to expand...
I feel like he would be able to at least clean himself up to the point where he can get himself a woman that's not a complete disaster. The pedo glasses, skullet, dog collar and billygoat beard do him no favors.
 
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Dick Pooman said:
I feel like he would be able to at least clean himself up to the point where he can get himself a woman that's not a complete disaster. The pedo glasses, skullet, dog collar and billygoat beard do him no favors.
Click to expand...
He's too much of an oldschool rockstar villain to ditch the dog collar and skullet. I mean, the dude got an on-stage shoutout from Ozzy himself, so maybe you should get on his level and stop changing your clothes for weeks on end hatur.

Serious question though, how many people in the world live like this but don't feel the need to archive their lives for us on the internet? It seems like everybody Josh knows is a literal waste of a person. I guess if they are happy fuck it, who am I to judge I just find it interesting.
 
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Here's Kobes' streams from yesterday:
Start:
- reviewing gatorade bolt 24
- Googles to see if it contains caffeine
- answers a call
- going to do a cooking video today
- reads troll texts
- owns trolls by blocking them
- puts his phone on airplane mode
- rant about sex
5:50:
- shills his PayPal #youdon'thavetodonatebutdonationsaregreatlyappreciated
- Reading chat
- he's heard of a couple of hot of age chicks around town who would end his dry spell
8:07:
- tries his gatorade
- he likes it
10:09:
- recording vocals
- he got GTA5 working online because homedad Clint dropped off an Internet cable
13:30:
- recording vocals
17:19:
- explains his lyrics are a metaphor for waiting patiently on the dating scene
- his dry spell is karma for cheating on Stephanie
- recording vocals
34:00:
- Kobes will find his perfect of age goth chicken to end his dry spell he just needs to be patient
- recording vocals
36:30:
- product placement Lucky Strikes
- Shows off his Lucky Strikes coupons
- recording vocals
41:19:
- Tries to light a cigarette with a chi ball
- Doesn't work. He'll try with the next cigarette
- recording vocals
44:50:
- taking a break to watch a YouTube video
47:50:
- everything in the universe has energy
- back to watching the video
52:17:
- Don't read while driving get a book on tape
- back to the video
56:54:
- puts on another video about clocks
- sits in silence
1:06:30:
- reincarnation is real
- puts on another video
- sits in silence
1:13:00:
- Someone put money in his PayPal. Instant transfer
- might make more root beer floats
- 2nd drink review. NOS mango
1:17:00:
- recording vocals
- #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement
- His album is black metal and power metal combined
- recording vocals
1:22:37:
- Someone sent money to his PayPal. Instant transfer
- Doesn't need money bad enough to do Streamlabs.
- He doesn't do it for the money he does it for the fans
- talking about the symbolism of his album cover
- dating scene rant
1:26:50:
- Talking about his dry spell
- Talks about getting called a creep in high school for checking out a girls tits. Says years later he ran into her and she said she regretted rejecting him in high-school
1:30:00:
- women are sneaky
- Ordering mountain dew at a bar scenario
1:33:28:
- recording vocals
- gender relations rant
1:36:00:
- Kobes likes girls who fart
- looks up a video about elevator farts
- I've never seen him enjoy a video so much
1:43:00:
- Guitar shredding
- Troll rant
- back to shredding
1:47:00:
- His pinky isn't broken thats just how he shreds
- Back to shredding
1:52:00:
- He doesn't know chords or scales he just plays
- guitar shredding
1:55:00:
- Doesn't care that he's going bald
- if Kobes won the lottery he would get hair plugs
- head banging and guitar shredding
1:59:00:
- Kobes would get BCRich to make him a custom guitar if he got famous enough
- recording vocals
The sound isn't as bad as usual in this food video
Start:
- making a bacon noodle cheese burger
- Texas toast
3:50:
- making noodles in the microwave
6:57:
- seasoning his burger
8:06:
- butter in the pan
- burger in the pan
- more seasoning
- more butter
- drains noodles kind of
13:09:
- eats some noodles
- gonna make a patty out of egg and noodles
16:19:
- burger on texas toast
- cooks bacon
20:36:
- seasoning on bacon
24:37:
- bacon is cooked
- bacon into noodles
- beats eggs
27:27:
- egg into noodles and bacon
- microwaves egg noodles and bacon
29:14:
- Sarrano gouda #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement
32:08:
- bacon and cheese on burger
- more cheese
- noodles egg bacon on burger
- more cheese
- doritos on burger
- shootout to food youtube channels
- more cheese
37:28:
- nukes burger in microwave
40:00:
- ranch on bun
40:32:
- finished burger
- flips burger
43:40:
- has a cigarette before eating
-lucky strike red 100 #notasponsorjustfreeadvertisement
47:00:
- eats burger like an apple
48:00:
- Cross section action
50:55:
- cheese pull action
- saving the rest for later
He was uploading his cooking video while streaming this so the quality is so much worse than usua. It's short so I did a summary instead of timestamps.
- finishing off his burger
- eats burger like an apple
- pixilated Cross section action
- he's uploading his cooking video while streaming
- youtube age restricted his video because he was smoking
- Kobes prefers cage free eggs
- reads a fan text
- too late to work on his vocals he'll work on them tomorrow
- reads chat
- fan made a coin with a wand on it for him
- when he figures out how to stream GTA5 he will let us know
 
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ShiningBrightly said:
WHY DOES HE ALWAYS SAVE HALF A BURGER FOR LATER? i'm sure he's just sticking it in the fridge and not in a container or anything either. why make it so fucking huge if you're not gonna eat the whole thing? his mind is truly a mystery...
Click to expand...
Probably something to do with his ED maybe instead of purging or beating himself up over bingeing he thinks eating half at a time is better.
 
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