🥝 Community Kiwi Space Station 13 Server (2024 edition) - Space Station 13

  • 🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.
I sense that since gecko will be late, he won't be able to post an announcement on Community Feature Submissions. Can somebody else do the needful in about 1-2 hours before the gayming session begins? Should attach one of the hilarious vids from the previous week to lure people in.
 
MAAAD said:
@geckogoy Normally I'd post bug report after the session, but since this is really urgent:
WOOP WOOP ANTAG AFK DETECTION ALWAYS DECLARES MALF AFK BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY AIs CAN'T MOVE
Malf also starts without objectives for some reason.
Click to expand...
Thats not how that works its last user input action, any click or anything does it. It must be something else like maybe it isn't calling its parent Life() proc or something. Anyhow driving right now so cant do anything about it today

MAAAD said:
I sense that since gecko will be late, he won't be able to post an announcement on Community Feature Submissions. Can somebody else do the needful in about 1-2 hours before the gayming session begins? Should attach one of the hilarious vids from the previous week to lure people in.
Click to expand...
True
 
I can't really make my mind up on the funniest video of the week, and besides I have no video editing skills and I usually do the announcement on /vm/ anyway so uhhhh... not gonna be me!
 
Gentlemen,
Islamic Turkroach jihad against SS13 coder tranny war when?
Another grimdark ERP server hits the dust, someone archived this per usual autism right before I did (archive)
Ive yet to check one out. Used to enjoy Lifeweb, despite its controversial features, so i really wanted a grimdark that isnt whitelisted or filled with dumb ERP mechanics.
So far, every other server ive heard of seems to have issues.
Click to expand...
 
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Merry said:
They're lame, simple as

A proper community events tab/header would be cool I was thinking though. Like how the movie nights get a lot of people via that
Click to expand...
Honestly, they put up 3 hour segments of cobes eating slop between movies and still get a decent turnout, if we got a weekly banner we would have like 50 players by now
 
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Story time!
​
the sacred console.png
>shift begins
>be RD
>I'm the only person aboard
>grab the spare and an antique gun, set up the engine
>drag an ID console out of the Bridge and put a golden ticket inside for when others arrive
>fuck off to explore the nearest space sectors
>stumble into Asteroid
>grab a Syndie space suit from that xenomorph-ravaged ruin
>fly away back into deep space
>find an abandoned white ship
>explore, it's an old medical shuttle of sorts
>get its power back on, it comes to life after years of abandonment
>it has a mass driver aboard
>find a Syndicate space suit with a helmet, a suspicious toolbox and a cool retro laser gun
>loot the valuables, put the space suits inside of a toolbox
>set mass driver to 10-second timed launch and climb inside
>hmmm, didn't I forget to do something? Oh that's right, magboo-
>driver's blast door opens
>ZAS knocks me over and sucks me out
>drop the black toolbox
>mass driver launches my spess loot at supersonic speeds
>NOOOOOOOOOO
>it's never been more over
>at least I still have the retro pistol
>return to the station, it's already populated
>clown declares himself a new Captain
>apparently the crew now worships the ID console I relocated earlier this shift, believing it's magical and capable of teleportation
>debunk their newfound false faith with the help of Space Snopes™ Fact-Checking App on my PDA
>hand the antique gun over to clown cap since I now have a gun of my own
>launch myself from Chapel's mass driver back into space
>end up at a Derelict Station
>find a room with a drone fabricator, turn it on
>make a lap around the derelict
>find the lost toolbox with loot
>HOLY SHIT, WE ARE SO BACK
>return to the station, the Emergency Shuttle has already been called
>hand out the red space suits and deconstruct the toolbox in RnD
>do some research, get to the Illegal level 4
>shuttle arrives, board it
>it's Halloween month, don a carved pumpkin on my head like the rest of the crew
>somebody gets lynched for reasons unknown
>relax at the beach on CentCom
busy shift.png
>be Medical Doctor
>half of the crew is just Medical personnel
>pet Runtime for good luck and productive shift
>she's a black cat, my wish gets jinxed
>we get patients right away
>shuttle full of casualties docks in several minutes as well
>making an honest living fulfilling those medical contracts
>venture into the main hallways
>witness Todd the Security Officer get murdered by a bald man in white, wearing a gas mask and a fake ID
>the murdered runs away, Todd is in crit
>put him in a stasis bag and rush to Medbay
>the guy has an internal bleeding, bunch of broken bones and is generally in an awful condition
>keep him alive using cryo and try to perform surgery
>he dies on an operating table anyway
>put him into a cloner and let him cook
>meanwhile somebody poisons the air supply
>stand in Medbay Lobby
>SUDDENLY, a fire is coming out of the vents in Medical proper
>CMO cluelessly runs inside
>firelocks drop right behind him
>guess I can't access advanced body scanner or Operating Room now
>Todd still has brain damage after healing in Cryo
>explain that I can't cure it right now due to the recent fire
>he asks me to elaborate on his killer
>notice how he looked similar to that inexperienced medic Grant, point that out to Todd
>since Grant is right here in the lobby, Todd asks to search him real quick
>the traitorous medic pulls a gun on him, guns him down and runs away
>explain what just happened to the other secoffs that just arrived at the scene
>back on the wild ride Todd goes
>retrieve surgery tools and paramedic's unrevivable body from the contaminated area in the meantime
>after finishing patching Todd up, treat clown's brian damag on a table in cryo
>when I'm almost done with the surgery, Grant runs in and guns me down
>proceeds to murderbone the entire crew afterwards
>gets rightfully stomped on at CentCom by the power rangers
What an intense and busy shift, I could literally never get a break.
ripley rampage.png
>be Roboticist
>busy constructing a Ripley
>Nuke announcement appears
>everybody panics and rushes to the Brig for protection
>HoS hands me HMG-2 - a gun for non-combat exosuits from armory
>personally oversees me finishing construction
>attach all of the modules, climb in and he escorts me to Security
>learn that CE has the nuclear authentication disk on my way there
>guard him in the Brig while people run around with guns and fight the nukies off-screen
>one of the Cooks keeps shooting lasers at me in Brig Hallway and running outside of my view like a little shit he is
>the Ripley is an extremely fragile mecha, so I have to act
>lock direction to the left
>raise the gun...
>WROOOOOM
>RATATATATA
>the shitter chef goes down
>so do the nearest walls and windows
>a Janitor returns to the Brig wearing a trophy nukie hardsuit
>some people are tending to the wounded in Security Locker Room
>somehow, the CE is dead
>explain to Ben the Jewish HoP how to cut the CE's rig open in order to retrieve the disk
>NTD Intrepid announces that it's sending an ERT our way
>schlomo finally secures the disk
>orders me to protect him, obey like a good little goyim
>ERT arrive
>their commander asks who has the disk
>Ben responds, is requested to hand it over and refuses
>the team try to apprehend him, get in their way
>the jew screams bloody antisemitism
>they chase him to the northern maint
>try to keep up with them
>hear gunshots
>walk into the maints
>Ben is getting tardwrangled by one Sec squaddie and their team leader
>YOU HEKKIN' NAZIS!
>target_acquired.ogg
>WROOOOOM
>RATATATTATATATATATATATATATTAATATATATAT
>ATATATATATTATATATATTATATATA
>gun the fuckers down in a series of long full-auto bursts
>janny gets caught in a crossfire
>so does Ben, unfortunately
>two other squaddies come
>explain that their teammates had it coming, guard the dead jew while they're retrieving all of the casualties
>they secure the disk
>the evac shuttle is coming, we make our way there
>maintenance drone makes a comfy home for disky in Evac
>one of the squaddies straps a timeless C4 to it for the lulz
>we board the shuttle
>me and the squaddie in Firefighter use our ridiculously long exosuit drills to "redecorate" the shuttle
>Gods rightfully smite our mechs for it
>shuttle docks at CentCom
>I was the only crew member to survive
>final killcount: 5
>didn't see a single nuke op even once this shift
God dammit these new exosuit guns are so much pure and unfiltered FUN, I simply can't get enough!
hunting captain.png
>be Scientist
>THREE Shaft Miners on crew manifest
>feelsgoodman.png
>spend the entire shift completing RnD, buying materials and printing fun toys for me and the miners
>Grayson the Miner messages me on PDA that they want to overthrow Williamson the Captain
>ask them to come and elaborate
>miners and John the CE arrive
>explain that they want to get back at cap for selling their materials without consent and trying to arm the nuke at the Bridge
>I guess the argument about nuke is fair and besides, I'm on good terms with these guys
>"Yeah, I'm in"
>they have a plan to lure him in the Bar
>me and John arrive and sit in the ambush there
>apparently William sees right through the miners' plan, it fails
>split to look for the captain in various parts of the station
>suspect he might be off-station, go to the Teleporter Room
>the teleporter is active, suspicious
>leave my two BoHs there before entering
>it was set to Derelict, walk into the active teleporter in there
>wait, where will this one take m-
>OH GOD IT WAS SET TO TOXINS TEST SITE
>I LEFT MY EMERGENCY BOX IN THE BOH
>FUCK FUCK FUCK
>scream for help over the radio
>rush to the exit, rapidly dying to space
>o2 locker is there, thank god
>don a space suit, turn on internals...
>pass out right before equipping the helmet
>...
>wake up in cryo
>the CE and one of the miner tell me that I died
>ah shit
>the emergency shuttle is here
>gear up, retrieve my BoHs
>John drags me to evac
>hear gunshots as we approach it
>board the shuttle at the last moment
>it departs
>a gun fight continues, it's Cap vs us
>he's really quick, manages to bring one of the miners down
>i get badly shot
>run up to the captain
>put one BoH into another
>it malfunctions and... sizzles, then turns to dust
>nothing cool happens
>oh.
>we catch and finish Willy off anyway before docking at CentCom
BoHs currently are extremely fucking disappointing. Require diamonds and high research levels to craft, yet do nothing when put in each other; not to mention that you can't even put backpacks inside because they're "of a similar size" (nigga wut?) and bulky items still can't be put inside of it. They need some heavy buffs, that's for sure.

Bug & feature request report @geckogoy
  • Replace some red Syndie space suits in Nuke Armory with those of different fancy colours;
  • No sound for thrown objects hitting mobs;
  • Still no sound for dropping/raising airlock bolts;
  • Add "access denied" sound to windoors;
  • Cutting wired grilles with wirecutters should shock you if you're not wearing glubbz;
  • Beepsky does not retaliate if you attack him, freezes in one place instead like a cuck;
  • DNA system (or DNA scanner) is definetly broken - humans don't turn into monkeys and vice versa upon changing the last DNA block;
  • Add weneedvote.ogg and pretenddemoc.ogg sounds to votes;
  • Seeing as there's no bananium in the code (the sprite for it exists in the files though), make Honker mecha construction depend on platinum;
    • this gives it some actual uses besides just selling to CentCom for profit;
  • Add a construction pathway and parts for Phazon mecha (it's fully functional, just can't be crafted), make them require both platinum and diamonds to craft;
    • could maybe require platinum and metallic hydrogen instead, but you'd need to bring back passive mining first;
  • Exosuit Fabricator's part outlet in Drone Fabrication is obstructed, so it can't print anything - should either move the fab in the upper part of the room or turn its part outlet upwards if that's possible;
  • The small mining hidey-hole on Asteroid is either unpowered roundstart or runs out of power way too fast (see screenshot);
    Riviera Station 13 2024-10-06 040315.png
    • could it be that I'm just retarded and it's supposed to derelict?
  • Fix fake walls please;
  • Port GPS from /vg/ for easier space exploration;
  • This windoor in white ship is facing the wrong side (see screenshot);
    Riviera Station 13 2024-10-06 043116.png
  • You definetly should be able to re-attach normal limbs since you won't always have a Roboticist around;
    • alternatively you could port wheelchairs from /vg/ and add them to Medbay;
  • No in-hand sprites for carved pumpkins;
  • No unique in-hand sprite for BoH (steal from /vg/);
  • You should be able to construct machinery with RPED (steal behaviour from /vg/) - click the machine frame that has a circuit installed to transfer parts, only requiring using a screwdriver on it to finish construction;
    • RPED should be able to hold the following items required in construction of machinery that aren't stock parts: cable coils, beakers, power cells;
  • Queues for Autolathe, Protolathe and Circuit Imprinter (retrieve the code from closed pastelwoodchipper's PR);
    • ability to retrieve materials from Autolathe should be retrieved as well;
  • Buff BoH;
    • uncuck "put BoH into BoH" interaction - should either spawn a small singulo or create an explosion;
    • allow it to hold items of any size;
    • allow it to hold backpacks (I'm 100% sure cringe baycoders were behind this arbitrary restriction);
  • Sounds for punching Slobbermutt and for Slobbermutt attacking;
  • Add more contract scanners in Medbay's Secondary Storage;
    • can you even get more of them right now? Should add a Auto/Protolathe recipe for them or make them come in Supply Crates if you can't;
  • WOOP WOOP AIs CAN ONLY TALK IN BINARY CHANNEL REGARDLESS OF THE KEY YOU TYPE BEFORE THE MESSAGE;
  • Malf spawns without its objective;
  • Antag AFK detection might be broken for malf since AIs can't move;
    • I was declared AFK as malf once on localhost while testing antag jingles, so I suspect the AFK detection does not take into account AI's eye "movement", only machinery interaction and all that;
  • Floating camera and light at Toxins Test Area (see screenshot);
    Riviera Station 13 2024-10-06 100602.png
  • Hoverpods need a few buffs as well;
    • make them move a lot faster in space;
    • maybe reduce the price?
    • bring back passenger compartments so that hoverpods have a passenger seat again (merge my PR reeeeee!!1)
 
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Technically this is Barotrauma but it's got a comment chain related to spacemen.
"Technical debt" (Archive)
- Yes the wzhzhzhzhzh proc is a hilarious code decision that nobody has bothered to change.
Hearing the SS13 clown honk as you said the words "exact game I want to play" was quite the jumpscare, despite the fact that I was thinking about SS13 for the entire video. I spent many years as the maintainer for tgstation's atmospheric simulation subsystem, which is a truly beautiful example of technical debt. I had a refactor PR with 800k lines changed. I fixed bugs that had been introduced when I was 3 years old. I pushed code that made the game completely unplayable to the production server... several times. I was raised in the fires of technical debt and sometimes I fear that I don't know anything else, even after all these years
Goddamn, massive respect for doing that though. I can't even imagine the stress of managing something like that.
Frankly, it was a lot less stressful than some other projects (volunteer or paid) I've managed lmao
Have to give massive kudos for working on SS13 code. I'm not a programmer, but I know enough to know that it's a flaming ball of spaghetti rolling downhill that in some eldritch manner functions as a Ford pickup with a cappuccino machine and a constantly running microwave oven as integral parts of the engine.
Thank you. It's so much worse than you've been led to believe. For the record, the microwave is running a function called wzhzhzhzhzh() and I'm not even joking about that
. . . Is the function named after the sound a microwave makes?
Yep. That's the name of the function that runs when you operate a microwave oven in-game.
On the one hand, that's incredibly stupid. On the other hand, it's perfectly on brand for SS13.
Oh my god, where YOU the guy that fixed how rounding in scrubbers piping would just delete small amounts of gasses?
hat doesn't actually ring a bell. I know in 2021 LemonInTheDark/TheFinalPotato made a change that allowed trace amounts of gases to be removed instead of sticking around forever, and that was related to rounding errors. That change wasn't my work as I was pretty much retired from SS13 at that point but I did consult on it to make sure it wouldn't break things too fundamentally. Is that what you're thinking of?
As a former longtime tgstation player who once sort-of coded two items, I was thinking of it during the entire video and I'm glad to see it already talked about in the comments. SS13 and the BYOND engine... there's Spaghetti Code, and there's entire mythical Italian provinces where tiny villages that have existed for millennia barely a few miles from each other are in constant siege of each other due to ideological differences on what herbs their spaghetti code should be garnished with. It was a complex leviathan before the first great leak, but to see it barely a few years afterwards was to look into the abyss. Sometimes I miss that game.
Could be the ongoing scrubbers issue where it would suck in the co2, but the vents would still push out the 79/21 mix, slowly suffocating someone in a 2x2 room? But fixing that one will never be easy. Thanks for the rework. Its MUCH better now that most of it is converted to modules. Only PR I made was trying to fix the paper code when it was found out the old way to make letters would crash the server if you put more than 10k letters in the windows style text box. I know my code was garbage as I never did javascript coding seriously till that point and I had to rewrite some of the window handlers just so you can format text properly. That said, even with all the latter PR's for it, I am glad they atleast kept fields. That was my whole goal hah.
 
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MAAAD said:
>somehow, the CE is dead
Click to expand...
>Shift start
>Check manifest to see who else is on command for today
>My nigga Jared Ramirez as HOS and some jew Ben Winsonstein (lol) as HOP
>Check in over command channel to see who's securing captains stuff given we don't have one
>No response
>Book it up to the captains office to secure important shit
>Disc and spare obtained
>Back down to the bay to start setup
>Crew is full of spergs, some spastic starts stabbing the monkey in the bar according to radio chatter
>Ignite engine
>Takes a bit longer than usual to get power flowing due to grabbing captain shinies
>Brig APC cell carks it because it chews through power like a bottomless pit
>Jared comes down wondering wtf is going on
>Allgood.png
>Crew bitching about not being given free for all gun access
>Talking about sacrificing Jared if islamists do rock up
>Lolno
>Announcement comes in from central command that they're tracking a ship incoming right to us with no transponder
>Fuck
>Everyone immediately smartens up and starts kinda working together
>Herd the crew up to the brig
>Confirm over command I've secured the disc and spare
>Stop to chuck on the rig suit in my office given it's got a few more tools than standard hardsuits
>Leg it to the brig
>Grab a pistol and extra mag, rest of the crew are armed to the teeth
>People milling around fucking everywhere in the brig
>Jared is down in robotics ensuring they get a mech done so we can stick the big fuck off gun in the armory onto it and have a fighting chance
>Keep an eye on everything at sec while waiting for them to finish up
>Have to remind the crew multiple times to stay put in security because the retards keep wandering off
>Hear an explosion ring out across the station
>It's go time boys
>Mech is ready literally in the nick of time
>Get most of the crew back up to the brig for the final time
>Mech is standing guard out the front, Jared and I flanking while the rest of the crew remain closer to the armory
>A few of the crew are starting to doubt there's even boarders
>Remind them we haven't seen them YET
>The last few stragglers finally show up
>Deploy my helmet, can feel shit is close to going down
>...
>...
>where the fuck are these retards
>Start to get a bit uneasy, keep the pistol in my grip
>Make a comment it's too quiet
>One of the late arrivals, a medic, has been keeping sort of close to me since shortly after he showed up
>Pay it no mind, everyones milling around in here, we're all on edge
>HOP Ben suggests we send a volunteer out to try locate the boarders
>Medic gets right behind me
>Typical terrible jewish idea HOP
>Medic draws his gun
>Tell the HOP no
>Medic opens fire straight into my back
>Have no time to turn around and shoot at him
>Collapse and bleed out almost immediately in the sec lobby while Jared immediately opens fire on the infiltrator
>Nukie number 1 dies about 5 seconds after
:^)
489789149.png

Also lol
blasma =DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.png
 
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I haven't had time to green, but I can summarize the last round of last week (which was apparently two entire hours long, but such is Extended)
>extended
>decide to go captain, Washington Washington
>trade away my captain's lazor to a miner for $500 right away (only to be executed with it later)
>set up cryo and fix a greyshit's eyes because no-one else is in medical
>some engineer got blown the fuck up, take his brain to robotics
>go hack into the vault for that sweet moolah (it's okay I'm the captain)
>take the nuke out and deploy it in bridge, disky inside
>try 800815 for code
>nada, oh well
>order some shit from cargo, including a hoverpod
>go take it out for a spin
>it's a slow piece of shit, the only advantage being that it's a space-capable (shit) mech that doesn't need assembly
>go outside, return, get foiled by the fucking airlocks not working
>almost suffocate, require babying
>learn my lesson, don space suit and visit armory for some Greater Gun (including a mech HMG)
>clone the janitor
>murder a spider in central atmospherics, but not before getting sleepytox'd
>chef helps me by handing me antitox
>continue to be on antitox vaxx for the next 30 fucking minutes before it fully wears out
>so I prepare in chemistry; mix up a pill bottle of the shit along with some other Fun Meds™
>random event takes the powernet out; I go restart it; CE complains like a ninny that "we can just wait" for it to restart itself
>do his job for him, restarted ahead of time
>get accused of sending precious minerals back on the cargo shuttle, when I had no hand in doing so
>visit robotics, queue a ripley to be built because why not, drop off HMG
>"Captain, bar?"
>THE GLOWIES ARE ONTO ME
>immediately run to the teleporter to fuck off to the derelict station, only returning for more antitox for my spider-borne neoliver
>return via derelict teleporter set to the bomb range
>skulk around the outside of the station, now positive that the glowies have taken their hold of the station's crew
>paranoia-struck, carefully extract the comms board from secure storage and build it in the abandoned pirate ship in old atmos
>call the shuttle
>"Captian did that"
>you bet your bippy
>make the mistake of not asking Central Command for assistance with mutiny, do it alone
>change dress into a less obvious medical hardsuit (another mistake)
>apparently another guy was dying, go investigate via the bomb test range where I spot a longass streak of blood leading into maintenance behind medical
>nothing
>go finish the mech, shuttle arriving soon
>mount the HMG
>board shuttle, school shootout SS13 intro playing globally


I did nothing wrong.
 
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