Lolcow Lee Goldson / Barneyfag / x86x2 / Revved - Barney Hatewatching Gigantic Autist & Aspiring 4chan Janitor

[Gensdupays]

I'm sure he'll find a way to live his extremely vicious and hateful crusade against the mentally disabled even after MLP slows down. That is if he doesn't end up in prison or dead.

 

[Meowthkip]

To be fair, I didn't even make the picture. I literally found that one on derpibooru. I don't view Star Trek as Barneyshit though, I never really cared that much for the series, except for TNG, which I discovered after finding out that Levar Burton from Reading Rainbow was on that show as well. That was only for a very brief period when I was young though.

You know, for somebody who professes his hatred of "Barney shit" at every given opportunity, you sure seem to mentally go back to a lot of public television shows made for young children.

So many shows for preschoolers and you only ever focus on one. Not a peep from you on, say, Sharon, Lois and Bram's Elephant Show, or Zoobilee Zoo or Eureka's Castle or Gulla Gulla Island or Teletubbies whatever other shit I can think of right now. It's all on Barney. No other show the special ed kids watched inspires even a fraction of the rage that Barney does.

So, what is it about Barney specifically that enrages you so? Is it him? His doofy voice? His catchphrases? The hammy kid actors? The admittedly eye-searing shade of violet of his skin? Are Baby Bop and BJ spared of your ire? What about Tomie De Paola, who appeared on Barney and Friends as himself to teach kids the joys of creating art?

Spoiler

I'm actually amazed I remembered this segment, as I'm pretty sure I was growing out of Barney at the time, but I liked his books, so I was glued to it.

Seriously, though, please articulate what it is about Barney himself that grinds your gears so much.

I think my endgame is probably when I go back to normal when MLP ends (hopefully with the full-length theatrical movie they announced). Then I'll consider my work complete.

You are aware that there will be an inevitable G5, right? And if they keep up the quality of the writing that there will possibly be more bronies in the future?

Face it, Sisyphus. That rock ain't stayin' on top of that hill.

That will be the end of the current generation of MLP, apparently. Not sure yet, but given its 2017 release date, it seems most likely. I think I started raging about Barney because of MLP to begin with.

Yeah, I still don't understand that association. Seriously, your mental connections between different shows are conspiracy theorist levels of convoluted.

 

[x86x2]

You know, for somebody who professes his hatred of "Barney shit" at every given opportunity, you sure seem to mentally go back to a lot of public television shows made for young children.

So many shows for preschoolers and you only ever focus on one. Not a peep from you on, say, Sharon, Lois and Bram's Elephant Show, or Zoobilee Zoo or Eureka's Castle or Gulla Gulla Island or Teletubbies whatever other shit I can think of right now. It's all on Barney. No other show the special ed kids watched inspires even a fraction of the rage that Barney does.

So, what is it about Barney specifically that enrages you so? Is it him? His doofy voice? His catchphrases? The hammy kid actors? The admittedly eye-searing shade of violet of his skin? Are Baby Bop and BJ spared of your ire? What about Tomie De Paola, who appeared on Barney and Friends as himself to teach kids the joys of creating art?

Spoiler

I'm actually amazed I remembered this segment, as I'm pretty sure I was growing out of Barney at the time, but I liked his books, so I was glued to it.

Seriously, though, please articulate what it is about Barney himself that grinds your gears so much.



You are aware that there will be an inevitable G5, right? And if they keep up the quality of the writing that there will possibly be more bronies in the future?

Face it, Sisyphus. That rock ain't stayin' on top of that hill.



Yeah, I still don't understand that association. Seriously, your mental connections between different shows are conspiracy theorist levels of convoluted.

Ok, just to be clear here, the only reason Barney instills so much rage in me is because of how much they watched of it and how the adults there were willing to defend the ones that liked it when they clearly shouldn't exist. I am aware that Teletubbies is an objectively worse show, that was played in special ed as well, but it was played quite a few times as well. Fuck that piece of shit show as well, and fuck the faggots who thought that getting it renewed was a good idea.

Just everything about Barney that you mentioned is fucking terrible, and only served as a guideline that you could put as little effort into such a show as possible and it would sell. This is many shows aimed at its demographic aren't worth watching, unlike say Sesame Street, given how it was a landmark in terms of education and childrens' television in many aspects. Basically for all the shit I see of Barney, none of it adds up as to why there's so much of it. For some reason, the franchise still isn't dead yet. There's still DVDs being released every few months, most likely just to satisfy the adult autists that still latch onto this shit.

As for Tomie DiPaola, I was disappointed because I was watching a few episodes of Reading Rainbow a couple of years back out of nostalgia and remembered his name in some of the books he was featured in. As you can imagine, I was quite disappointed when I saw he was in an actual episode of Barney, so I decided to review that one for my DeviantArt.

And yes, I'm aware that there will most likely be a G5, but I'll try to be hopeful that by then nothing Barney-related will come my way then.

 

[Trans Fat 41g]

 

[Adamska]

Ok, just to be clear here, the only reason Barney instills so much rage in me is because of how much they watched of it and how the adults there were willing to defend the ones that liked it when they clearly shouldn't exist. I am aware that Teletubbies is an objectively worse show, that was played in special ed as well, but it was played quite a few times as well. Fuck that piece of shit show as well, and fuck the faggots who thought that getting it renewed was a good idea.

Brah, you just now implied you loved watching Teletubbies too. Doubly so considering that you could literally drown it out by listening to Iced Earth while watching some NG shit for all your edgy needs. No one mandated that you had to look in. The fact you try to hammer it home is why I assume you anally masturbate and orgasm when you hear Barney.

I'd comment on this idiocy more, but I'm typing ony phone at the moment. Last thing Imma say at the moment is it takes a certain person to expound on why a show is shit to this degree, and it's the same reason why so many homophobes turn out to be fegs.

 

[Meowthkip]

Ok, just to be clear here, the only reason Barney instills so much rage in me is because of how much they watched of it and how the adults there were willing to defend the ones that liked it when they clearly shouldn't exist. I am aware that Teletubbies is an objectively worse show, that was played in special ed as well, but it was played quite a few times as well. Fuck that piece of shit show as well, and fuck the faggots who thought that getting it renewed was a good idea.

Just everything about Barney that you mentioned is fucking terrible, and only served as a guideline that you could put as little effort into such a show as possible and it would sell. This is many shows aimed at its demographic aren't worth watching, unlike say Sesame Street, given how it was a landmark in terms of education and childrens' television in many aspects. Basically for all the shit I see of Barney, none of it adds up as to why there's so much of it. For some reason, the franchise still isn't dead yet. There's still DVDs being released every few months, most likely just to satisfy the adult autists that still latch onto this shit.

As for Tomie DiPaola, I was disappointed because I was watching a few episodes of Reading Rainbow a couple of years back out of nostalgia and remembered his name in some of the books he was featured in. As you can imagine, I was quite disappointed when I saw he was in an actual episode of Barney, so I decided to review that one for my DeviantArt.

And yes, I'm aware that there will most likely be a G5, but I'll try to be hopeful that by then nothing Barney-related will come my way then.

You only bring up Teletubbies after I mention it, and add barely anything to my specific annoyances I had with Barney as I turned seven that I had not even thought about until my youngest sister had outgrown him. I throw you bones and all you got to add is "it was cheap and Sesame Street was better." Can you articulate why Teletubbies was bad? I'm not going to throw out any suggestions. Please give some actual criticism, and keep in mind Teletubbies was aimed at babies and toddlers and unlike Barney, seemed to be tolerated by the same stoner college kids that whipped up anti-Barney sentiment in the first place. Teletubbies makes more sense when you're fucking blazed, I guess,

Also, wait, you reviewed the episode Tomie de Paola showed up in? Of course you did. Jesus Christ, the man was spreading his love of drawing on a show guaranteed to attract young eyeballs. You're disappointed in him doing something that's enriching children's lives, somebody who puts out quality children's books and develops children's love of reading and art? All because he showed up on Barney instead of Sesame Street? Jesus Christ, how incredibly petty.

Every single time you respond you just make yourself look worse somehow.

 

[Conrix]

Brah, you just now implied you loved watching Teletubbies too. Doubly so considering that you could literally drown it out by listening to Iced Earth while watching some NG shit for all your edgy needs. No one mandated that you had to look in. The fact you try to hammer it home is why I assume you anally masturbate and orgasm when you hear Barney.

I'd comment on this idiocy more, but I'm typing ony phone at the moment. Last thing Imma say at the moment is it takes a certain person to expound on why a show is shit to this degree, and it's the same reason why so many homophobes turn out to be fegs.

And then Barneyfag will eventually deny his sexually confused feelings for Barney yet again, and then wonder why we keep insisting that Barney is his gay senpai despite insisting that he hates Barney, while listening to Dismember or something equally edgy to drown out his confused feelings.

 

[x86x2]

You only bring up Teletubbies after I mention it, and add barely anything to my specific annoyances I had with Barney as I turned seven that I had not even thought about until my youngest sister had outgrown him. I throw you bones and all you got to add is "it was cheap and Sesame Street was better." Can you articulate why Teletubbies was bad? I'm not going to throw out any suggestions. Please give some actual criticism, and keep in mind Teletubbies was aimed at babies and toddlers and unlike Barney, seemed to be tolerated by the same stoner college kids that whipped up anti-Barney sentiment in the first place. Teletubbies makes more sense when you're fucking blazed, I guess,

Also, wait, you reviewed the episode Tomie de Paola showed up in? Of course you did. Jesus Christ, the man was spreading his love of drawing on a show guaranteed to attract young eyeballs. You're disappointed in him doing something that's enriching children's lives, somebody who puts out quality children's books and develops children's love of reading and art? All because he showed up on Barney instead of Sesame Street? Jesus Christ, how incredibly petty.

Every single time you respond you just make yourself look worse somehow.

Where do I begin with Teletubbies? Ok, first off, there's just a lot of shit that doesn't make fucking sense, like the goddamn sunbaby or the fucking TVs in their goddamn bellies. All I get is that their shit is all powered by wind energy or some shit, but I'm not sure how they can project images onto their goddamn stomachs unless it's shown that they have electrical components inside of them, in which case, why the fuck are they eating custard? Isn't food supposed to be bad for circuit chips? And for some reason, whenever they do the segments with the TV bellies, they decide to watch it again. Why? It's literally the same shit you just watched, why would you want to watch the same thing twice in a row. Whatever bullshit lore they're to establish in this piece of shit, they fail because they don't explain it well enough.
It's bad enough that this repetitive, monotonous series went on for 365 episodes, but they're making more apparently, and they look just as horribly disfigured as they did in the past. This was a thing that did not deserve to exist. It deserves to be erased.

Oh, and apparently Tomie didn't appear in just one episode of Barney, he appeared in 3, one of them centering around a conflict, which many people claim the show lacks, but unfortunately, they didn't even handle THAT properly.
Anyways, I don't outright hate him, because I know the guy is clearly capable of doing better, given the fact that he had a few books that showed up before on Reading Rainbow, definitely one of my favourite PBS series as a kid, so I'm merely disappointed instead of hating him outright.

 

[Ruin]

Where do I begin with Teletubbies? Ok, first off, there's just a lot of shit that doesn't make fucking sense, like the goddamn sunbaby or the fucking TVs in their goddamn bellies. All I get is that their shit is all powered by wind energy or some shit, but I'm not sure how they can project images onto their goddamn stomachs unless it's shown that they have electrical components inside of them, in which case, why the fuck are they eating custard? Isn't food supposed to be bad for circuit chips? And for some reason, whenever they do the segments with the TV bellies, they decide to watch it again. Why? It's literally the same shit you just watched, why would you want to watch the same thing twice in a row. Whatever bullshit lore they're to establish in this piece of shit, they fail because they don't explain it well enough.
It's bad enough that this repetitive, monotonous series went on for 365 episodes, but they're making more apparently, and they look just as horribly disfigured as they did in the past. This was a thing that did not deserve to exist. It deserves to be erased.

Oh, and apparently Tomie didn't appear in just one episode of Barney, he appeared in 3, one of them centering around a conflict, which many people claim the show lacks, but unfortunately, they didn't even handle THAT properly.
Anyways, I don't outright hate him, because I know the guy is clearly capable of doing better, given the fact that he had a few books that showed up before on Reading Rainbow, definitely one of my favourite PBS series as a kid, so I'm merely disappointed instead of hating him outright.

Do you put this much energy into your studies?

 

[Trombonista]

They're called Teletubbies because of the TVs (tellies) in their bellies.

You're not that bright, @x86x2 .

 

[Rin]

Where do I begin with Teletubbies? Ok, first off, there's just a lot of shit that doesn't make fucking sense, like the goddamn sunbaby or the fucking TVs in their goddamn bellies. All I get is that their shit is all powered by wind energy or some shit, but I'm not sure how they can project images onto their goddamn stomachs unless it's shown that they have electrical components inside of them, in which case, why the fuck are they eating custard? Isn't food supposed to be bad for circuit chips? And for some reason, whenever they do the segments with the TV bellies, they decide to watch it again. Why? It's literally the same shit you just watched, why would you want to watch the same thing twice in a row. Whatever bullshit lore they're to establish in this piece of shit, they fail because they don't explain it well enough.

Please tell me you don't expect Teletubbies to actually have "lore." It's for literal babies (and stoners), they don't realize that if you put your hands over your face, your face is still there.

 

[MegasHant]

Where do I begin with Teletubbies? Ok, first off, there's just a lot of shit that doesn't make fucking sense, like the goddamn sunbaby or the fucking TVs in their goddamn bellies.

It's a show meant for toddlers, why does it have to make sense? Also, you're a grown man, why are you caring about this?

 

[Sanae Kochiya]

Where do I begin with Teletubbies? Ok, first off, there's just a lot of shit that doesn't make fucking sense, like the goddamn sunbaby or the fucking TVs in their goddamn bellies. All I get is that their shit is all powered by wind energy or some shit, but I'm not sure how they can project images onto their goddamn stomachs unless it's shown that they have electrical components inside of them, in which case, why the fuck are they eating custard? Isn't food supposed to be bad for circuit chips? And for some reason, whenever they do the segments with the TV bellies, they decide to watch it again. Why? It's literally the same shit you just watched, why would you want to watch the same thing twice in a row. Whatever bullshit lore they're to establish in this piece of shit, they fail because they don't explain it well enough.
It's bad enough that this repetitive, monotonous series went on for 365 episodes, but they're making more apparently, and they look just as horribly disfigured as they did in the past. This was a thing that did not deserve to exist. It deserves to be erased.

Oh, and apparently Tomie didn't appear in just one episode of Barney, he appeared in 3, one of them centering around a conflict, which many people claim the show lacks, but unfortunately, they didn't even handle THAT properly.
Anyways, I don't outright hate him, because I know the guy is clearly capable of doing better, given the fact that he had a few books that showed up before on Reading Rainbow, definitely one of my favourite PBS series as a kid, so I'm merely disappointed instead of hating him outright.

Are you seriously asking for the lore and logic behind the babyface of a sun and four colored living beanie babies?

Tell me, are you going to talk to us next about how the engines in Thomas the Tank Engine reproduce? Maybe talk about the civil rights of Muppets in Sesame Street?

This is a show aimed for motherfucking 3-year-olds. THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE WORD LORE MEANS.

 

[x86x2]

They're called Teletubbies because of the TVs (tellies) in their bellies.
You're not that bright, @x86x2 .

I wasn't questioning why they were called Teletubbies, I was questioning why they had the TVs in their bellies, like how the fuck they had them to begin with. And to people saying that "oh it's made for 3-year-olds", yeah, I know that, but that still doesn't explain the adult autists that like this shit as well. I haven't run into as many of them as I have Barneyfags, but they still exist, considering how I came across maybe 3 of them in high school, 2 of them also being Barneyfags. There is literally no reason for these people to be watching this shit. I'm gonna dissect this shit at the high school mindset I had when I saw this shit being played. If that was what was meant, then I have every right to criticize it the way I am doing right now.

 

[Trombonista]

Like I said, not that bright.

 

[Sanae Kochiya]

I wasn't questioning why they were called Teletubbies, I was questioning why they had the TVs in their bellies, like how the fuck they had them to begin with. And to people saying that "oh it's made for 3-year-olds", yeah, I know that, but that still doesn't explain the adult autists that like this shit as well. I haven't run into as many of them as I have Barneyfags, but they still exist, considering how I came across maybe 3 of them in high school, 2 of them also being Barneyfags. There is literally no reason for these people to be watching this shit. I'm gonna dissect this shit at the high school mindset I had when I saw this shit being played. If that was what was meant, then I have every right to criticize it the way I am doing right now.

There is literally no reason for you to be complaining about people watching that shit.

Do you see the issue here? They're autistic, but you're similarly autistic for complaining about the autistic.

 

[Conrix]

There is literally no reason for you to be complaining about people watching that shit.

Do you see the issue here? They're autistic, but you're even more autistic for complaining about the autistic.

ftfy.

 

[MysticMisty]

So...a guy appears not once, not twice, but three times, three actual times, on Barney, and it's a "disappointment". My Little Pony aired in a time slot next to Barney, and it's some sort of super secret Barney conspiracy and that's what makes it horrible? I'm sorry but I can't wrap my mind around your extreme stupidity.

Do you see the issue here? They're autistic, but you're similarly autistic for complaining about the autistic.

Autisception.

 

[AnOminous]

Where do I begin with Teletubbies? Ok, first off, there's just a lot of shit that doesn't make fucking sense, like the goddamn sunbaby or the fucking TVs in their goddamn bellies. All I get is that their shit is all powered by wind energy or some shit, but I'm not sure how they can project images onto their goddamn stomachs unless it's shown that they have electrical components inside of them, in which case, why the fuck are they eating custard? Isn't food supposed to be bad for circuit chips? And for some reason, whenever they do the segments with the TV bellies, they decide to watch it again. Why? It's literally the same shit you just watched, why would you want to watch the same thing twice in a row. Whatever bullshit lore they're to establish in this piece of shit, they fail because they don't explain it well enough.

That is some hardcore fucking autism. You must have watched a lot of it to even know this shit. I never knew any of this shit because I never watched it. Because I didn't like it. Sort of like I've never watched an episode of Barney. Because I didn't like it.

I'm not surprised you were a huge fan of Teletubbies. Which one was your waifu? Tinky Winky?

 

[Conrix]

I wasn't questioning why they were called Teletubbies, I was questioning why they had the TVs in their bellies, like how the fuck they had them to begin with. And to people saying that "oh it's made for 3-year-olds", yeah, I know that, but that still doesn't explain the adult autists that like this shit as well. I haven't run into as many of them as I have Barneyfags, but they still exist, considering how I came across maybe 3 of them in high school, 2 of them also being Barneyfags. There is literally no reason for these people to be watching this shit. I'm gonna dissect this shit at the high school mindset I had when I saw this shit being played. If that was what was meant, then I have every right to criticize it the way I am doing right now.

How about because they're autistic and possibly literal retards, so toddlers' shows are at the comprehension level they understand? Maybe Sanae was right about you being just as autistic, or maybe it was me about you being even more autistic; you've seriously got to be some kind of heartless parasite to consider a crusade against a kid's show just because some mentally deficient adults enjoy it and it personally annoys you.

Oh and may I help expand your music tastes a bit?