- Joined
- Apr 10, 2021
Holy shit why is all this esoteric autistic coomerism in one mod and why haven't I heard about this earlier 
Let's Sperg Let's Play XCOM XPiratez Mod (ON SUMMER HIATUS) - Lethal amounts of autism ahead.
- Thread starter L50LasPak
- Start date
- Joined
- Apr 1, 2017
If I make the cut, I wanna be a nudist!
ARMOR IS FOR PUSSIES!
ARMOR IS FOR PUSSIES!
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2019
1. First Outings
Time to get this trainwreck on the road.
I've neglected to name the damn van. I guess I'll have to get to it next time. We intercept the target only to find another, identical van to ours flying around aimlessly. That means this vehicle almost certainly belongs to the faction we escaped from in the intro. Time for some payback.
Here we go...
Whoops, might night vision threshold is set too low.
Yeah I hope you like the color orange because that's the default for XPiratez. Our Gals have a bonus to night vision, kind of like Sectoids from the first game except not quite as overpowered. I could switch it to be something else but I'd rather keep the experience accurate.
Our first enemy!
Forever Sunrise draws first blood, decapitating a random enemy who had no idea what hit her.
A firefight ensues. Our pursuers open up with laser fire while we return with musket and cannon shot. You'll notice in the second screenshot that a unit flashes red when they are hit now, to distinguish from very close misses.
Witty Squid definitely takes out one with her Minicannon. Chuckles lands an excellent shot with the musket, then I believe NerdShamer is the one who snapshots the last enemy.
Forever Sunrise is wounded from laser fire, and NerdShamer receives the first promotion to Boss Gal, a rank roughly equivalent to Sergeant.
A new system this time around is Condemnations, because the original mod was named Commendations, get it? Most of these give minor bonuses and minor debuffs, something I find a little bit irritating as most of them drain a pirate's Freshness stat, which more or less determines how long they can stay in a battle. I suppose the idea for that is to prevent the player from relying too much on their best troops into the late game.
It's around this point I notice that I can neither purchase nor manufacture new ammunition. Uh, that's gonna be a problem.
Evidently our crew has finally agreed that they are pirates. I think you can see why I was really sad to lose my desk clerk captain headcanon.
I've decided I'm going to stick with the gimmick that I'm some unseen logistics manager anyway, because it fits my understanding of the game better and it'll be easier to write about than trying to roleplay as whoever the Hell happens to be highest rank at the moment.
Look at all of this bullshit we have to research now, and we've only completed one technology! I want proper uniforms for my crew, so I focus on that first, and assign someone to decode the documents those people looking for us were carrying.
This research reveals to us a key player, Captain Jack, and his wards the Lokk'Naars. The Lokk'Naars are presumably named after the Loc-Nar, the evil orb in every story in the anthology movie Heavy Metal. Captain Jack, judging by the difficulty menu, is named after captain Jack Sparrow of Pirates of the Caribbean.
In my opinion there's only one Captain Jack. RIP Franky Gee.
The upshot of all of this is that we can now purchase a bunch of junk, including ammunition for most of our black powder weapons.
There are so many techs in this game that I'm not going to include the Research Completed notifications for the rest of this LP. Pirate Style allows us to start manufacturing Pirate uniforms, though we currently lack a key resource, Rare Earth Elements (Magnets? Is that how the skimpy outfits don't fall off?), required to make them.
A random wanderer labeled as a Young Uber appears and we promptly throw her ass in jail for trespassing.
Radar picks up some civvies on a joyride in our airspace.
I've armed everyone with muskets at this point because those heavy weapons are just impractical and can't hit shit.
Chuckles attempts to peacefully subdue a civilian by clubbing her over the head with a lead pipe. I think someone should have told her that the lead pipe is a murder weapon in Clue for a reason. The last civilian is shot where he stands on a ridge somewhere.
Our score is technically negative for this mission but its so insignificant that there's no reason to give a fuck. Still, our benefactors generally look down upon the pointless murder of random civilians.
One of our Runts claims to speak for the rest of them now. They had better not be thinking about unionizing or I'll have my mistress tan their hides. We get research on the Extractor we already started with as well.
The game politely reminds me to do what I already know I should be doing by giving me a tip on a mechanic I actually wasn't aware of.
Another search party.
It's at this point I remember that you can club enemies with the back of the musket, thus meaning you don't actually have to waste any inventory space or carry weight on melee weapons.
These medic chicks really aren't up to much, especially compared to our Escaped Lunatics.
That's that.
With some research freed up I get the Brainers to work interrogating the Young Uber and working on recruitment methods.
We have the option to raid an alien-worshiping Temple of Sirius. This is a bit early in the game to attempt this, and two of our Gals are still wounded.
Who am I kidding? I can't resist.
We end up landing just behind the temple, which means a long walk to the entrance but at least there's some cover.
These assholes in blue are almost always bad news; they tend to be armed with shotguns, lasers, and the occasional flamethrower.
Here we see one of the circumstances where everyone being half naked is a serious disadvantage. Our mutant Gals can survive in a variety of climates but they still get cold when the weather is nippy. This has the effect of draining Energy every turn, down to I think 50%.
You're supposed to capture these unarmed civilians wandering around out here doing nothing, but they trigger reaction fire in the mean time so I just plug them on my turn.
Fuck. One of those assholes definitely has a shotgun. The other has a decent pistol I think.
Excellent shot Witty. I think that was just the guy with the pistol though.
Yeah it was. Chuckles catches some buckshot.
Witty and Moths are too far away to hit the guy armed with the shotgun so I have them take out two of the other enemies milling around. This is apparently sufficient to get the asshole with the shotgun to retreat, where Chuckles manages to ventilate him despite having half her guts hanging out. Niggermancer gets Chuckles patched up and I have her advance up to the corpse since she's just gonna pass out if she stands around anyway.
I have Chuckles ditch her musket.
That shotty comes in handy as we advance.
In order to make the game more realistic, a wounded soldier that ceases bleeding will continue to suffer Stun damage over time until they eventually pass out, unless you keep them going with stimmies (which we don't have) in the mean time. This can get dangerous too as if they suffer Stun damage in excess of 200% of their current Health, they die. Its now a race against time to clear this building out before Chuckles freezes to death on the ground.
One unequivocally great feature of XPiratez that I dunno if other mods do is Bug Hunt Mode, which activates in a battle after a given amount of time has passed to ease the difficulty of needing to track down the last enemy. Its particularly important in XPiratez because your squads start out smaller and the maps can get quite complicated and byzantine as time goes on. The scanner indicates only one enemy remains on the map, the prick in the blue robe. I guess the last cultist who ran off armed with a pistol bled to death in the woods somewhere.
I have Niggermancer pry the shotty from Chuckles's cold but not quite dead hands and lead the way inside. The Priest bursts out of the backroom unexpectedly, hitting Niggermancer with buckshot and sending her tumbling down the stairs. To my surprise, Witty snipes the guy with her last musket round, killing him.
We got a lot of junk from that Temple Raid. It hurt, but it was worth it.
New Condemnations and their Bootypedia entries.
Shit, one of our sisters in in trouble. And about to be sold into prostitution! We've got to do-
-nothing. Because everyone is fucking wounded from the last fight. NerdShamer will recover in three days, but is the mission really gonna stay active for that long?
While we wait for NerdShamer to get stitched up, some research completes.
This particular tech unlocks our first branching path research. Which is labeled ?Gals Are Superior? and ?We Need Male Touch?, both of which boil down to whether or not we can recruit more of our amazon Gals or male Slave Soldiers. Technically, you don't need to research either of these to actually gain access to a pool of either recruit, but we're not quite there yet. I might consider putting some of these branching paths up to a vote sometimes, but for now I go with ?Gals Are Superior? because their stat bonuses just unquestionably are. Fear not though, we'll have Slave Soldiers eventually. Just not the easy way.
(Ryukibass - Once Upon A Time In The West Cover)
To my surprise the mission to save our captured sister is still on the map by the time NerdShamer is healed up, so I arm her with the shotty we picked up from the Temple Raid, a knife, all the extra ammo we've got and a handful of bombs. She's going to have to earn her rank this time by soloing this whole mission, and I'm not actually sure what she's going to be up against.
I dunno what this empty building was supposed to be, I know what it is now: cover.
The good news is, its only bandits. The bad new is, most of them are armed with conventional weaponry. NerdShamer can tank maybe one or two hits, but with nobody to heal her she's basically done for if she catches one.
Buckshot isn't exactly the most effective thing at range either. She nails one of the bastards, but is almost on her second batch of shells before she's even hit the second guy.
It takes two shells to wipe out the second guy, and she ventilates a hooker for good measure.
Some faggot with a knife eats buckshot for breakfast. Who the Hell wears a bright purple hoodie in the middle of a warzone? Two shells left, let's see what that other guy had on him.
Three guys just tried to rush a lone traveler who just wasted them all, and one of those dudes had a mare's leg on him? I think I know what song I'm putting over this section of the post.
Looks like its just the hookers left to defend their whorehouse with pocket pistols.
I don't think actual mare's legs had this kind of accuracy in real life, but NerdShamer is certainly a crackshot with her new one.
The third hooker was just winged though and has to be chased down and clubbed out.
Looks like the last guard was hiding like a bitch and letting the women do all the work.
The last enemy, some punk, actually has the balls to charge NerdShamer and somehow avoid taking a bullet in the process. He's knocked on his ass for his trouble, but taken alive.
A ton of fucking loot. You can see our wayward sister there at the bottom, listed as Castaway Gal.
I guess NerdShamer did enough damage with that shotty to get the Psycho condemnation. The game might also count the mare's leg as a shotgun too though.
As you've probably guessed, Young Ubers are younger members of our mutant species, which are called Ubers. The game hasn't named them in our research yet, except for here, which I think is something of an oversight but whatever. Point is we can now recruit any Young Ubers we rescue/imprison, except our original unfortunately as you always end up spending an object to research it.
A certain kind of freebie research takes the form of tips, advice or occasionally riddles. I don't know if you can tell by my face or not, but I'm the kind of man who hates riddles. This does remind me though that there is an entire category of Bootypedia entries I forgot to include in the first post, which are essentially a tips menu combined with manual entries to help new players get a grip on the mod's eccentricities.
I'm forced to wonder what Dioxine's KF username is now.
The fuck was I doing again?
Oh yeah, since NerdShamer did so well against those bandits, I figure she can handle a bus full of nurses.
What a hilariously broken early game weapon.
These missions are becoming pedestrian already.
Our Brainers end up destroying a bag of cash trying to figure out what it is. They're lucky most of our Gals are laid up right now otherwise there'd probably be a brawl over it.
Meanwhile, NerdShamer sets out for a hat trick on her solo career.
That takes care of the guards. The briefing said something about a robot lookout?
It doesn't even move around or interact with you in any way. Also I missed the frame of it exploding.
The rest of the personnel are about as useful as the robot door greeter honestly.
I missed the Condemnations screen somehow, but there were two new ones.
It may not look it, but this is one of the most important items in the game, because it allows our troops to self-heal instead of needing to be treated by an ally.
I notice there a bunch of tech in the Bootypedia that has been unlocked by incidental research, so it looks like its time for another exposition dump. These are shitty craft weaponry I have zero plans to ever use.
Some random weapons, most of which have unconventional effects.
An entry for our Armored Vaults facility that wasn't unlocked right away for some reason.
Two Condemnations that we haven't really seen yet. The Escaped Lunatic one is redundant with the other Bootypedia entry and I suppose Condemned just fires the first time a Gal gets a Condemnation.
An entry for the damn near useless parrot weapon that seems to have replaced the damn near useless parrot pet that would always get instantly shot the minute you sent it into battle.
Some slightly less tasteless clothing for our Gals to wear when I can afford the annoying Rare Earth Resources used in its construction.
A random couple wanders into our hideout. Maybe we should work on actually camouflaging the door better.
We've got the opportunity to pick up another Castaway Gal here and Witty Squid is finally back on her feet, so I send her and NerdShamer out.
Oh fuck, that's a werewolf.
I remember when these things were first added to the game and they were fucking vicious. They didn't bleed because the game treated them like drones, and on top of that they were resistant to anything weaker than a shotgun. In terms of speed and movement they act a lot like a pumped up Chryssalid, just without the reproduction part obviously.
Oh Jesus.
WHAT
I have no idea how she did it, but Witty actually managed to knock a werewolf unconscious, as a reaction no less. Granted it had already taken three musket shots, but come on man, they're only musket rounds. Unfortunately its not the only one on the map, but if there's only two its possible the Gals can outfox it somehow before the first one wakes up. I have Witty get the other one to panic by setting it on fire.
I try a couple of different things but all I can do is really keep the fucking thing at a distance temporarily.
Its in the way of our lost sister too so there's no way we can just grab her and get the Hell out of Dodge. Out of ideas I fall back to the van. There's not really any good weapons in here, just all the melee shit we started out with. Wait a minute.
Groovy.
Fuck yeah.
Who needs silver?
This is what we get from interrogating one of those useless Researchers NerdShamer captured at that watchtower.
We also get a free tip from a random event. I personally always ignored the charts in XCOM as I'm not enough of a math nerd or powergamer to utilize them properly, so its nice to know that this is prescribed "prescribed" in XPiratez.
Some more random events and research.
Finally.
I'm not sure why exactly my mistress is the one with the most cleavage on display despite wearing the exact same outfit as the other Gals. Maybe she's making fun of my prudish nature.
Anyway, on to the next-
There goes my smile.
Time to get this trainwreck on the road.
I've neglected to name the damn van. I guess I'll have to get to it next time. We intercept the target only to find another, identical van to ours flying around aimlessly. That means this vehicle almost certainly belongs to the faction we escaped from in the intro. Time for some payback.
Here we go...
Whoops, might night vision threshold is set too low.
Yeah I hope you like the color orange because that's the default for XPiratez. Our Gals have a bonus to night vision, kind of like Sectoids from the first game except not quite as overpowered. I could switch it to be something else but I'd rather keep the experience accurate.
Our first enemy!
Forever Sunrise draws first blood, decapitating a random enemy who had no idea what hit her.
A firefight ensues. Our pursuers open up with laser fire while we return with musket and cannon shot. You'll notice in the second screenshot that a unit flashes red when they are hit now, to distinguish from very close misses.
Witty Squid definitely takes out one with her Minicannon. Chuckles lands an excellent shot with the musket, then I believe NerdShamer is the one who snapshots the last enemy.
Forever Sunrise is wounded from laser fire, and NerdShamer receives the first promotion to Boss Gal, a rank roughly equivalent to Sergeant.
A new system this time around is Condemnations, because the original mod was named Commendations, get it? Most of these give minor bonuses and minor debuffs, something I find a little bit irritating as most of them drain a pirate's Freshness stat, which more or less determines how long they can stay in a battle. I suppose the idea for that is to prevent the player from relying too much on their best troops into the late game.
It used to be even worse somehow. A year or two ago the changelog mentioned that a lot of the background and Bootypedia images had been swapped out, mostly to get rid of the 3D ones, though some remain.
It's around this point I notice that I can neither purchase nor manufacture new ammunition. Uh, that's gonna be a problem.
Evidently our crew has finally agreed that they are pirates. I think you can see why I was really sad to lose my desk clerk captain headcanon.
I've decided I'm going to stick with the gimmick that I'm some unseen logistics manager anyway, because it fits my understanding of the game better and it'll be easier to write about than trying to roleplay as whoever the Hell happens to be highest rank at the moment.
Look at all of this bullshit we have to research now, and we've only completed one technology! I want proper uniforms for my crew, so I focus on that first, and assign someone to decode the documents those people looking for us were carrying.
This research reveals to us a key player, Captain Jack, and his wards the Lokk'Naars. The Lokk'Naars are presumably named after the Loc-Nar, the evil orb in every story in the anthology movie Heavy Metal. Captain Jack, judging by the difficulty menu, is named after captain Jack Sparrow of Pirates of the Caribbean.
In my opinion there's only one Captain Jack. RIP Franky Gee.
The upshot of all of this is that we can now purchase a bunch of junk, including ammunition for most of our black powder weapons.
There are so many techs in this game that I'm not going to include the Research Completed notifications for the rest of this LP. Pirate Style allows us to start manufacturing Pirate uniforms, though we currently lack a key resource, Rare Earth Elements (Magnets? Is that how the skimpy outfits don't fall off?), required to make them.
A random wanderer labeled as a Young Uber appears and we promptly throw her ass in jail for trespassing.
Radar picks up some civvies on a joyride in our airspace.
I've armed everyone with muskets at this point because those heavy weapons are just impractical and can't hit shit.
Chuckles attempts to peacefully subdue a civilian by clubbing her over the head with a lead pipe. I think someone should have told her that the lead pipe is a murder weapon in Clue for a reason. The last civilian is shot where he stands on a ridge somewhere.
Our score is technically negative for this mission but its so insignificant that there's no reason to give a fuck. Still, our benefactors generally look down upon the pointless murder of random civilians.
One of our Runts claims to speak for the rest of them now. They had better not be thinking about unionizing or I'll have my mistress tan their hides. We get research on the Extractor we already started with as well.
The game politely reminds me to do what I already know I should be doing by giving me a tip on a mechanic I actually wasn't aware of.
Another search party.
It's at this point I remember that you can club enemies with the back of the musket, thus meaning you don't actually have to waste any inventory space or carry weight on melee weapons.
These medic chicks really aren't up to much, especially compared to our Escaped Lunatics.
That's that.
With some research freed up I get the Brainers to work interrogating the Young Uber and working on recruitment methods.
We have the option to raid an alien-worshiping Temple of Sirius. This is a bit early in the game to attempt this, and two of our Gals are still wounded.
Who am I kidding? I can't resist.
We end up landing just behind the temple, which means a long walk to the entrance but at least there's some cover.
These assholes in blue are almost always bad news; they tend to be armed with shotguns, lasers, and the occasional flamethrower.
Here we see one of the circumstances where everyone being half naked is a serious disadvantage. Our mutant Gals can survive in a variety of climates but they still get cold when the weather is nippy. This has the effect of draining Energy every turn, down to I think 50%.
You're supposed to capture these unarmed civilians wandering around out here doing nothing, but they trigger reaction fire in the mean time so I just plug them on my turn.
Fuck. One of those assholes definitely has a shotgun. The other has a decent pistol I think.
Excellent shot Witty. I think that was just the guy with the pistol though.
Yeah it was. Chuckles catches some buckshot.
Witty and Moths are too far away to hit the guy armed with the shotgun so I have them take out two of the other enemies milling around. This is apparently sufficient to get the asshole with the shotgun to retreat, where Chuckles manages to ventilate him despite having half her guts hanging out. Niggermancer gets Chuckles patched up and I have her advance up to the corpse since she's just gonna pass out if she stands around anyway.
I have Chuckles ditch her musket.
That shotty comes in handy as we advance.
In order to make the game more realistic, a wounded soldier that ceases bleeding will continue to suffer Stun damage over time until they eventually pass out, unless you keep them going with stimmies (which we don't have) in the mean time. This can get dangerous too as if they suffer Stun damage in excess of 200% of their current Health, they die. Its now a race against time to clear this building out before Chuckles freezes to death on the ground.
One unequivocally great feature of XPiratez that I dunno if other mods do is Bug Hunt Mode, which activates in a battle after a given amount of time has passed to ease the difficulty of needing to track down the last enemy. Its particularly important in XPiratez because your squads start out smaller and the maps can get quite complicated and byzantine as time goes on. The scanner indicates only one enemy remains on the map, the prick in the blue robe. I guess the last cultist who ran off armed with a pistol bled to death in the woods somewhere.
I have Niggermancer pry the shotty from Chuckles's cold but not quite dead hands and lead the way inside. The Priest bursts out of the backroom unexpectedly, hitting Niggermancer with buckshot and sending her tumbling down the stairs. To my surprise, Witty snipes the guy with her last musket round, killing him.
We got a lot of junk from that Temple Raid. It hurt, but it was worth it.
New Condemnations and their Bootypedia entries.
Shit, one of our sisters in in trouble. And about to be sold into prostitution! We've got to do-
-nothing. Because everyone is fucking wounded from the last fight. NerdShamer will recover in three days, but is the mission really gonna stay active for that long?
While we wait for NerdShamer to get stitched up, some research completes.
This particular tech unlocks our first branching path research. Which is labeled ?Gals Are Superior? and ?We Need Male Touch?, both of which boil down to whether or not we can recruit more of our amazon Gals or male Slave Soldiers. Technically, you don't need to research either of these to actually gain access to a pool of either recruit, but we're not quite there yet. I might consider putting some of these branching paths up to a vote sometimes, but for now I go with ?Gals Are Superior? because their stat bonuses just unquestionably are. Fear not though, we'll have Slave Soldiers eventually. Just not the easy way.
(Ryukibass - Once Upon A Time In The West Cover)
To my surprise the mission to save our captured sister is still on the map by the time NerdShamer is healed up, so I arm her with the shotty we picked up from the Temple Raid, a knife, all the extra ammo we've got and a handful of bombs. She's going to have to earn her rank this time by soloing this whole mission, and I'm not actually sure what she's going to be up against.
I dunno what this empty building was supposed to be, I know what it is now: cover.
The good news is, its only bandits. The bad new is, most of them are armed with conventional weaponry. NerdShamer can tank maybe one or two hits, but with nobody to heal her she's basically done for if she catches one.
Buckshot isn't exactly the most effective thing at range either. She nails one of the bastards, but is almost on her second batch of shells before she's even hit the second guy.
It takes two shells to wipe out the second guy, and she ventilates a hooker for good measure.
Some faggot with a knife eats buckshot for breakfast. Who the Hell wears a bright purple hoodie in the middle of a warzone? Two shells left, let's see what that other guy had on him.
Three guys just tried to rush a lone traveler who just wasted them all, and one of those dudes had a mare's leg on him? I think I know what song I'm putting over this section of the post.
Looks like its just the hookers left to defend their whorehouse with pocket pistols.
I don't think actual mare's legs had this kind of accuracy in real life, but NerdShamer is certainly a crackshot with her new one.
The third hooker was just winged though and has to be chased down and clubbed out.
Looks like the last guard was hiding like a bitch and letting the women do all the work.
The last enemy, some punk, actually has the balls to charge NerdShamer and somehow avoid taking a bullet in the process. He's knocked on his ass for his trouble, but taken alive.
A ton of fucking loot. You can see our wayward sister there at the bottom, listed as Castaway Gal.
I guess NerdShamer did enough damage with that shotty to get the Psycho condemnation. The game might also count the mare's leg as a shotgun too though.
As you've probably guessed, Young Ubers are younger members of our mutant species, which are called Ubers. The game hasn't named them in our research yet, except for here, which I think is something of an oversight but whatever. Point is we can now recruit any Young Ubers we rescue/imprison, except our original unfortunately as you always end up spending an object to research it.
A certain kind of freebie research takes the form of tips, advice or occasionally riddles. I don't know if you can tell by my face or not, but I'm the kind of man who hates riddles. This does remind me though that there is an entire category of Bootypedia entries I forgot to include in the first post, which are essentially a tips menu combined with manual entries to help new players get a grip on the mod's eccentricities.
I'm forced to wonder what Dioxine's KF username is now.
The fuck was I doing again?
Oh yeah, since NerdShamer did so well against those bandits, I figure she can handle a bus full of nurses.
What a hilariously broken early game weapon.
These missions are becoming pedestrian already.
Our Brainers end up destroying a bag of cash trying to figure out what it is. They're lucky most of our Gals are laid up right now otherwise there'd probably be a brawl over it.
Meanwhile, NerdShamer sets out for a hat trick on her solo career.
That takes care of the guards. The briefing said something about a robot lookout?
It doesn't even move around or interact with you in any way. Also I missed the frame of it exploding.
The rest of the personnel are about as useful as the robot door greeter honestly.
I missed the Condemnations screen somehow, but there were two new ones.
It may not look it, but this is one of the most important items in the game, because it allows our troops to self-heal instead of needing to be treated by an ally.
I notice there a bunch of tech in the Bootypedia that has been unlocked by incidental research, so it looks like its time for another exposition dump. These are shitty craft weaponry I have zero plans to ever use.
Some random weapons, most of which have unconventional effects.
An entry for our Armored Vaults facility that wasn't unlocked right away for some reason.
Two Condemnations that we haven't really seen yet. The Escaped Lunatic one is redundant with the other Bootypedia entry and I suppose Condemned just fires the first time a Gal gets a Condemnation.
An entry for the damn near useless parrot weapon that seems to have replaced the damn near useless parrot pet that would always get instantly shot the minute you sent it into battle.
Some slightly less tasteless clothing for our Gals to wear when I can afford the annoying Rare Earth Resources used in its construction.
A random couple wanders into our hideout. Maybe we should work on actually camouflaging the door better.
We've got the opportunity to pick up another Castaway Gal here and Witty Squid is finally back on her feet, so I send her and NerdShamer out.
Oh fuck, that's a werewolf.
I remember when these things were first added to the game and they were fucking vicious. They didn't bleed because the game treated them like drones, and on top of that they were resistant to anything weaker than a shotgun. In terms of speed and movement they act a lot like a pumped up Chryssalid, just without the reproduction part obviously.
Oh Jesus.
WHAT
I have no idea how she did it, but Witty actually managed to knock a werewolf unconscious, as a reaction no less. Granted it had already taken three musket shots, but come on man, they're only musket rounds. Unfortunately its not the only one on the map, but if there's only two its possible the Gals can outfox it somehow before the first one wakes up. I have Witty get the other one to panic by setting it on fire.
I try a couple of different things but all I can do is really keep the fucking thing at a distance temporarily.
Its in the way of our lost sister too so there's no way we can just grab her and get the Hell out of Dodge. Out of ideas I fall back to the van. There's not really any good weapons in here, just all the melee shit we started out with. Wait a minute.
Groovy.
Fuck yeah.
Who needs silver?
This is what we get from interrogating one of those useless Researchers NerdShamer captured at that watchtower.
We also get a free tip from a random event. I personally always ignored the charts in XCOM as I'm not enough of a math nerd or powergamer to utilize them properly, so its nice to know that this is prescribed "prescribed" in XPiratez.
Some more random events and research.
Finally.
I'm not sure why exactly my mistress is the one with the most cleavage on display despite wearing the exact same outfit as the other Gals. Maybe she's making fun of my prudish nature.
Anyway, on to the next-
There goes my smile.
Attachments
Last edited:
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2019
Random idea: can you name the ship after me, rather than a crewmate?
Its fine if not, but the former seems to last longer.And I can think of worse things than having dozens of gals riding me at once.
Its fine if not, but the former seems to last longer.
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2020
Arr ye ship should have a noble (entertaining) name befitting any crew of insane amazon pirates
Another interesting mechanic to note is that most human enemies once they have been knocked out once are added to the surrender list (this doesnt apply to enemies with inherent weapons like warewolves), so if you knock out every enemy once they all surrender and you get free prisoners.
However I cant remember whether they still requip items they're sleeping on so if paranoid you can drop their weapons one tile away so they are just wandering the map unarmed until you clean everybody else up.
Also keep in mind there is a relatively recent (added a year or so back who even knows) concept of overstunning which will happen when your gal/prisoner is stunned the fuck out by a stun weapon/wounds/damage to double their health where they will start taking hp damage per turn. Its indicated by a ghost icon above a stunned unit
Also gals can punch people with their bare hands (empty hand slot), may be less accurate when one hand is occupied but if your stuck in melee range with an unwieldy cannon its probably a better option against light enemies
Also also if a hostile is in melee range they cause severe accuracy penalties to range attack and have a chance based on reactions to cause shooters to guarantee miss and fire randomly (when they try to fire) which can be a way to neutralise people with big guns but small fists in a desperation moment
And yes rocks suck shit but there is opportunities later to be rid of them using methods other than hard earned dosh
Another interesting mechanic to note is that most human enemies once they have been knocked out once are added to the surrender list (this doesnt apply to enemies with inherent weapons like warewolves), so if you knock out every enemy once they all surrender and you get free prisoners.
However I cant remember whether they still requip items they're sleeping on so if paranoid you can drop their weapons one tile away so they are just wandering the map unarmed until you clean everybody else up.
Also keep in mind there is a relatively recent (added a year or so back who even knows) concept of overstunning which will happen when your gal/prisoner is stunned the fuck out by a stun weapon/wounds/damage to double their health where they will start taking hp damage per turn. Its indicated by a ghost icon above a stunned unit
Also gals can punch people with their bare hands (empty hand slot), may be less accurate when one hand is occupied but if your stuck in melee range with an unwieldy cannon its probably a better option against light enemies
Also also if a hostile is in melee range they cause severe accuracy penalties to range attack and have a chance based on reactions to cause shooters to guarantee miss and fire randomly (when they try to fire) which can be a way to neutralise people with big guns but small fists in a desperation moment
And yes rocks suck shit but there is opportunities later to be rid of them using methods other than hard earned dosh
- Joined
- Dec 23, 2020
I couldn't recall whether I'd played this mod and wow nope I woulda remembered this shit.
Anyway kill everyone asap and put me in bro
Anyway kill everyone asap and put me in bro
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2018
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2020
GOOOOOOOOOO LEFT GO RIGHT GO PICKUP THE STEP, GO LEFT GO RIGHT GO LEFT!
And here we go again, clubbing people in the face for fun and profit. I'll gladly volunteer for some skullduggery once you have a free chassis to load up with Mooger Ma'am.
I say we name it the Booty Call.
Uncle Johnny, get back in the house and take your meds. We don't want the cops to get involved again.
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2019
You do not fuck around with the size of those updates. And the amount of titties per screen is way higher than I've expected, this mod is a hilarious blend of interesting ideas, clever game design, and absolutely unabashed coomerism. I want you to research the Academy Nurse, just to confirm that no female below a D cup survived the apocalypse.
Also, if there's a vote on gals only vs mixed squads - cast my vote into the big titty lesbian pirate hat, the style of this mod needs to be respected.
I love working with professionals.
Also, if there's a vote on gals only vs mixed squads - cast my vote into the big titty lesbian pirate hat, the style of this mod needs to be respected.
I love working with professionals.
Seconded.
ANF
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 14, 2017
I've played the mod for a few hours yesterday and I feel like you're meant to do the opposite of what "Great Advice" says
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2018
I don't know the meme Death Realms are from.
I like the Fallout approach to references, which seems to be in effect here. "If someone doesn't know the reference, it should fit in so naturally that no one knows it's a reference." eg. The slayer perk in Fallout being a reference to Buffy.
I guess my gal could be called "Lady Dredd", or name her as a reference to something.
I like the Fallout approach to references, which seems to be in effect here. "If someone doesn't know the reference, it should fit in so naturally that no one knows it's a reference." eg. The slayer perk in Fallout being a reference to Buffy.
When I played, there were ground units that move for a long time. This is where you used cars to follow them, since aircraft would run out of fuel long before they set up camp and can be attacked. If you see a contact with speed 100 or less, that's how you could tell it was a ground party.
I like this version better.
There were rare male heroes when I played.
I guess my gal could be called "Lady Dredd", or name her as a reference to something.
- Joined
- Aug 31, 2019
Ahhh Yes werewolfs. I remember those from other mods.
Expect the one I remember most is when there was like 6+ of the on a mission ,and they all resistance to bullets to the point they taking 20+ sniper rounds to kill each.
Expect the one I remember most is when there was like 6+ of the on a mission ,and they all resistance to bullets to the point they taking 20+ sniper rounds to kill each.
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2020
Oh come on
You know the people who made this will fap to anything.
You know the people who made this will fap to anything.
Just Some Other Guy
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 25, 2018
I like how the images all feature buxom women in varying states of nudity, yet the in-game character profiles look like super built She Hulks.
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2019
What you see in game are troon goons hopped up on steroids and psychodelics, and the bootypedia items are how they see themselves.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
Those Werewolves are a thing in Xcomfiles as well, though there they're simply called 'Wolfmen'. They are the toughest of the animal-human hybrids you can face early on so taking them out with shitty weapons like that is quite a solid showing. It also shows how powerful our starting Gals are in this case.
Just for funzies the other two animal-human hybrids I know of are Catmen which are faster but less tough and Owlmen who have fantastic vision but are the most fragile of the lot. I think they've lower damage too but I'm no expert, its unclear if these variants will appear in XPiratez since they've got a very clear 'Fucking with Post-apoc authority' bend to things in comparison.
I'm growing to hate the person who writes this stuff, this sounds like shitty writing made for a female presenter at a Sony panel. 'Dat <x>', 'Lady Boner' and the like. I'm not expecting high quality writing from prompts that were probably intentionally typed one-handed but I'd rather see the chintzy pirate speak than this. I guess its a mercy it isn't using that stilted ass 3D porn for the icon.
Just for funzies the other two animal-human hybrids I know of are Catmen which are faster but less tough and Owlmen who have fantastic vision but are the most fragile of the lot. I think they've lower damage too but I'm no expert, its unclear if these variants will appear in XPiratez since they've got a very clear 'Fucking with Post-apoc authority' bend to things in comparison.
Throwing a third behind this, good spirit to take with this game so far.
I'm growing to hate the person who writes this stuff, this sounds like shitty writing made for a female presenter at a Sony panel. 'Dat <x>', 'Lady Boner' and the like. I'm not expecting high quality writing from prompts that were probably intentionally typed one-handed but I'd rather see the chintzy pirate speak than this. I guess its a mercy it isn't using that stilted ass 3D porn for the icon.
Honka Honka Burning Love
In Clown World, the only god is the one who Honks.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2019
At least it is a bunch of poorly written deviancy about Hot Chicks, it could be worse..it could be a bunch of poorly written deviancy about Trannies.Those Werewolves are a thing in Xcomfiles as well, though there they're simply called 'Wolfmen'. They are the toughest of the animal-human hybrids you can face early on so taking them out with shitty weapons like that is quite a solid showing. It also shows how powerful our starting Gals are in this case.
Just for funzies the other two animal-human hybrids I know of are Catmen which are faster but less tough and Owlmen who have fantastic vision but are the most fragile of the lot. I think they've lower damage too but I'm no expert, its unclear if these variants will appear in XPiratez since they've got a very clear 'Fucking with Post-apoc authority' bend to things in comparison.
Throwing a third behind this, good spirit to take with this game so far.
I'm growing to hate the person who writes this stuff, this sounds like shitty writing made for a female presenter at a Sony panel. 'Dat <x>', 'Lady Boner' and the like. I'm not expecting high quality writing from prompts that were probably intentionally typed one-handed but I'd rather see the chintzy pirate speak than this. I guess its a mercy it isn't using that stilted ass 3D porn for the icon.
- Joined
- Aug 21, 2018
Peasant
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2019
It's pretty unreal seeing a lone pirate handle multiple missions solo after how the last two LPs went. I guess with all the content in this mod, they've never really done a fine balance pass.
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2013
The idea of a “What If” sequel of XCOM where XCOM failed and humanity was sent back to Zero and having to claw their way back up from using rocks and spears is honestly an awesome concept. A story of the strength of the human spirit.
So, of course it’s gonna be overshadowed by lewd images and fan service.
Not that I mind. Looking forward to where we all end up.
So, of course it’s gonna be overshadowed by lewd images and fan service.
Not that I mind. Looking forward to where we all end up.