Let's Players originating from Something Awful - ft. VoidBurger, General Ironicus, Bob Kamoc

[BlueChan]

Another thing I found while checking old archives of her ask.fm: this bizarre saga regarding her opinions on dogs. (Like, as a whole.)

See, she doesn't like them. This wouldn't be a problem if she didn't originally explain her dislike of them in the most bizarre, inflammatory way possible:

what would I have to do to make you hug my beautiful dog and relish his dogness - ThatPazuzu
Turn him into a cat somehow. It is literally impossible for me to relish a thing I am genuinely uncomfortable being around lol. When confronted with dogs, I just try to ignore them. Or if they get up in my face (Which they do 95% of the time, because they KNOW I don't like them and they're the Jehovah's Witnesses of animals, just like their owners) I go "Yeah haha, woof woof, right? Wow, you're loud. You definitely are a dog, yep. Ooh great job sliming my hand or shoe or purse, that's definitely great that you did that and not gross. Good job doing dog stuff. Yes, nice. Please stop now." and I nervously pet them in a place they might not bite me in order to appease them so they might go away. Then I wash my hands because WHAT IS IT WITH DOGS?? They almost all fucking smell and make your hands smell disgusting and feel like... dusty?? Like there's dust on them?? It's like petting a horse except horses have an excuse because they're big, live mostly outside, and can't possibly clean themselves. Dogs COULD but choose not to because fuck you that's why. I don't see why dogs can't do the cat thing of cleaning themselves, they're pretty flexible from what I've seen. Also, you'd think cats would smell gross because they lick themselves all day and cat spit smells just as gross as dog spit, but somehow I can nuzzle my whole face in a cat tummy and it smells neutral and clean. But dogs just sit around in their own filth, with shit berries hanging off their ass and their owners just think they're angels from heaven blessing them with shit berries. Haha oh how cute, it's a shit berry, guess I'll clean that off the anus of my sweet precious baby that has the strength to kill me. Meanwhile let's look down on cats for pooping outside of the single litter box that gets cleaned once a week because ew um that's gross I'm way above that *pulls dingleberries off a dog's anus with papertowels because the entire species refuses to indulge in basic hygiene.* Oh haha my dog has destroyed his own expensive bedding and pissed on my bed, how darling! What a silly! Oh my god I can't believe that bitchy cat clawed my couch, what a horrible destructive animal, fuck all cats. Cats are the Hitler of animals and dogs are the Dalai Lama of animals
Anyway, people think I'm fucking weird as shit because I don't drop everything and worship these obnoxious, disgusting fucking animals that I hate. I have met a total of FOUR completely cool dogs that I actually wanted to hang out with (they all acted like cats and were small) in my life and I've met probably over fifty. I cannot relish dogness because dogness seems to comprise of everything I hate: filthiness, loudness, obnoxiousness, unknown strength and big teeth, impossible body language, combined with the brainwashedness of our whole culture to think those things are apparently awesome qualities and not gigantic dealbreakers. But I'm the crazy one, of course, to hate such unappealing creatures

TL;DR She hates how dogs are unsanitary in favor of cats, then states that dog owners are like Jehovah's Witnesses and declares that our culture is brainwashed into liking dogs, hence why people are baffled when she doesn't like them. (I'm not making this shit up.)

Naturally, people were upset:

For someone who hates dogs you sure do love acting like a bitch.
Ba-dum-tssssh!!

It's not about dogs, it's about you feeling the need to air your terrible opinions while not recognizing why people are angry so you retreat to your following that defends you. You're essentially TB with less followers, VB.
hhahahahahahahahahahahahaha I still don't like dogs and you're just going to have to deal with that. By all means, stop following me and block me if me not liking dogs is truly that important to you. I block gamergaters because that stuff is important to ME. If me hating dogs is a deal breaker, then bon voyage! Go hug a dog and be happy without me in your life! It's not hard!

I seriously don't get why you bother with this site. Either the questions are all hateful and idiotic or just plain idiotic. I would like to think you're better than this, but you felt the need to write 30 paragraphs about why you don't like dogs, so maybe not.
You don't know which questions I ignore/delete/block. But I'll set an example by blocking your followup hateful, idiotic, shitty nonquestion to prove that I *do* do such things, I guess. Bye~

Why say something that you know is going to make a lot of people upset? It's fine to not like an animal but to go into such gross detail about it just seems needlessly spiteful.
Because it's my real opinion and it shouldn't make people as upset as it does, and they should at least acknowledge the double standards. I'm not like, ~pretending~ to have this opinion to get people upset??
When I get upset that people ignore, talk shit about, and disown cats (like, literally dumping their cats on other people because they can't bring them with them somewhere) willy-nilly, I'm the weirdo. Do any of those things to a dog and you're a monster. Apparently, it's ok to get personally offended if I express why I hate dogs, that's normal. I'm not needlessly spiteful, my spite has been cultivated by years of double standards regarding dogs and cats, and augmented by even more years of encountering almost exclusively bad dogs and almost exclusively the sweetest cats. I have perfectly valid reasons to be spiteful, and dog owners coming out of the woodwork to do the *same thing they always do* instead of being cool about it or realizing that yeah, there IS a double standard and they COULD understand why I would be bothered by it and prefer cats, only confirms my beliefs.Loving dogs: Normal. Accepted. Expected. Taken for granted that you love dogs because who doesn't love dogs? Only unrelatable weirdos don't like dogs. If anyone ran across an abandoned dog on the streets, they wouldn't ignore it, they would call it in, try to find its owners, bring it to the vet, save it from the streets, etc! Because dogs! Running over a dog with a car would understandably ruin someone's YEAR.
Loving cats: Weird. Likened to "crazy cat lady," even if you only have ONE or TWO cats. Suggested that they have that one parasite that makes people like cats, because you'd have to be brain damaged somehow to like cats. Rescuing more than one from the streets is considered a problem, likened to an addiction, and looked down upon. Running over a cat with a car is something that should bum you out for a day maybe, but c'mon. They live outside, it's to be expected that they get run over sometimes.
Hating cats: Normal. Accepted. Expected. Taken for granted because, outside of gifs on the internet, who actually LIKES cats? They don't love you, they just like food! They are incapable of love. They're also better at surviving outside, so who cares if they're out there in the dead of winter, starving, living near a busy road, etc. They're roadkill. Why be bothered by them living outside? If they want to act more independent than dogs, I won't be bothered by them being independent outside where thy can freeze to death.
Hating dogs: Insane. How could you not like these animals? They do XYZ behaviors, which are all behaviors you don't like or are overrated. How could you not like that? Are you crazy?
I could actually keep going on about this, so everyone do yourself a favor and GET OVER IT. I hate dogs, I love cats, and there is a double standard of acceptable behavior here that you should really think about instead of trying to "convert" me or shame me like you always do.

(Yes, she really did claim there's a double standard re: cats vs. dogs)

And then shit started getting real:

You say you hate it when people dump cats on other people, but didn't you do that with your own cats?
Thanks for the super cool troll question to try to make me upset. People who hate dogs are obviously bigger monsters than people like you, who got so upset over me disliking dogs, that you decided to "white knight" (lol) the animals I dislike by taking it out on me, by bringing up something terrible that happened to me, which I had no control over, and manipulating it into a thing that's totally different and didn't happen. Makes total sense and isn't drastically more hateful than me having a rant about dogs.
Rest assured, you are a good person. All the dogs will think better of you for having dug up a painful memory of the Dog Hater's life and using it against her to defend dogkind from her evil ways. I hope the dogs throw you a parade. Good job representing dog-likers, that totally doesn't reconfirm any beliefs I previously held about dog likers being a little overly adamant about dogs.

(She's taking this one guy's statement as representative of everyone who likes dogs?)

Then she rapidly approaches peak insufferable:

No, it wasn't a "troll question". I seriously wanted to know. I wanted to know why you brought it up. I wanted to know why my friend of 15 years who recently died in front of me is just an attention seeking beast people are tricked into liking.
HEY where did I say shit about YOUR dog? "This particular anon's dog is terrible" is something you got out of "I don't GET dogs, the majority of them have been fucking weird to me and has shaped my opinion of them. They're gross and scary and I don't like them and people are WEIRD AS SHIT about defending them" The latter part of which you are TOTALLY PROVING CORRECT, lol. Fuck off.
Also, that's NOT the way you ask that question. "Why is my dog bad to you?" somehow got translated into basically "You're a hypocrite because you dumped your own cats on someone in my imaginary fantasy scarecrow land." That non-question is all about springing a hurtful memory upon me as revenge for your dog, who I have nothing to do with, didn't kill, never met, etc.
Also I'm legitimately sorry for your loss. But wow, stop being a colossal shithead. How would you like it if I said something hurtful about your dog's passing, about how that has something to do with how YOU act on the internet? That would be a huge asshole thing to do. Fuck you. Hope your dog is in dog-heaven, but fuck you. You're allowed to like whatever shitty animal you like and I'm allowed to like whatever shitty animal that I like, and it's nobody's business to force liking an animal on someone else.

Here she characterizes her initial statement as merely "I don't like dogs or understand why people like them" when it was really more "people are wrong to like dogs because I think they're gross".

You go around blocking and calling out people on their shitty opinions but expect people to be accepting of yours? Saying you hate the entire species of canine because cats are more marginalized only fuels the idea that cat lovers are awful.
(a) I don't do that. I don't follow people, discover I dislike their opinions, then block them. I *don't* follow people, they come to me, spew absurd stuff, and I decide I don't want them around me, which means I kinda have to block them because I'm *already* not following them.
(b) Fuck you
(c) I can't believe we're still talking about dogs
(d) Learn to read. I didn't say that the ONLY reason I don't like dogs is because cats are "marginalized." Learn to read. I wrote a huge rant about dogs and the only point you got out of it is that I dislike them because cats have it harder? Learn to read. Try that last sentence first, there's only three words in it, so it's probably a pretty good starting point in learning how to read.

Also, it's strange that someone who loves Silent Hill so much could hate dogs, considering

 

[Cyber Bowling]

We should rescue Alison Rapp's dogs and give them to Chip. He strikes me as being a good dog owner.

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

I'm just curious why people keep asking her opinions on things.

 

[Lackadaisy]

I'm just curious why people keep asking her opinions on things.

My guess is 50% her sending herself questions and 50% people trying to get her to reee

 

[BlueChan]

I'm just curious why people keep asking her opinions on things.

I'm not entirely sure myself. I guess curiosity?

I'll probably dump some more stuff later but for now here's an extremely telling ask:

 

[Emperor Julian]

Im honestly at a loss in how you could funnel so much distaste into dogs/doglovers without some sort of phobia. Im not a dog person in that i wouldnt get one but It's like getting assmad that some people prefer chicken over beef.

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

Im honestly at a loss in how you could funnel so much distaste into dogs/doglovers without some sort of phobia. Im not a dog person in that i wouldnt get one but It's like getting assmad that some people prefer chicken over beef.

I don't even think it's that she feels that strongly about it. I think it's just that her gotis has trained her to never stop rambling because everyone wants to hang on her every word obviously.

Makes me wonder what a resume would look like if she wrote one but I doubt that'll ever come up.

 

[NotAWeeb]

I'm just curious why people keep asking her opinions on things.

I don't think anybody really cares, they just want to see a grown adult sperg out with essays of vitriolic rage over the most inconsequential things.

 

[DuckSucker]

Dogs represent the patriarchy, obviously. "MAN'S Best friend?!" Are you fucking kidding?!

Actually if you look at her summary of why she doesnt like them, a lot of it does have to do with common fears of strange men. Their "filthiness, loudness, obnoxiousness, unknown strength, impossible body language", like, a kind of boorish rudeness where they're too invasive and unaware of your personal space. It's like stranger danger applied to dogs.

But bringing up the "double standard of cats" is so fucking hilarious too. That's literally, like at the level of a stand up act of George Carlin making fun of someone who's taking life too seriously and hung up on PC Culture and social justice.

I actually love dogs and hate cats, but her meltdown over it is hilarious because it's such a common, inconsequential question and nobody really cares about anybody else's preference for dogs or cats. All you have to do is say dogs or cats and move on. She must have ADD because shes got a lot of common traits, like letting her brain run wild and come up with ridiculous theses.

 

[BlueChan]

Makes me wonder what a resume would look like if she wrote one but I doubt that'll ever come up.

I remember one of the old blogs that came up earlier had a resume, but it didn't get archived. The closest thing we have is this short part of her old BrandYourself profile:

 

[proteus4994]

I remember one of the old blogs that came up earlier had a resume, but it didn't get archived. The closest thing we have is this short part of her old BrandYourself profile:

Event Caricaturist for one day, huh? I'm sure companies will be drooling over that experience.

Apparently nobody ever told her that when you pad a resume* you pad it with things that look good, not 1 day jobs.

*Edit: it's not technically a resume but she clearly treated it like one

 

[Galaxy Harasser]

Hey I don't see any mention of that diamond industry job her aunt gave her. Maybe because on a resume it'll be like:

"Auntie's Diamond Co.
New York City
Sep 201x-Nov201x
Quit after 2 months because I ain't no NYC Ratrace fucker!"

 

[BlueSpark]

That dog post was seriously neurotic.

And lol at listing those video editing programs and video editing as a hobby/interest; she's moaned on twitter many times about not being able to do things in Premiere.

Apparently nobody ever told her that when you pad a resume* you pad it with things that look good, not 1 day jobs.

Not to mention that all of the art things she listed are basically redundant other than "hand drawing". Especially "pen" and "ink" being separate.

 

[BlueChan]

Apparently nobody ever told her that when you pad a resume* you pad it with things that look good, not 1 day jobs.

*Edit: it's not technically a resume but she clearly treated it like one

What's funny is that she doesn't even do freelance artwork anymore:

I noticed you are a bit of an artist. Is drawing something you're into, or is it just a mild interest? - Gar Ma-Nar-Nar‎
I studied it in school. It's something I used to be very into, but the cutthroat competition of the industry (and the INSISTENCE of clients and other artists that your time isn't worth any real money) sucked all my enjoyment out of it. The business side of it killed my interest. Depression may have contributed to my lack of interest, too. I don't draw for fun anymore and barely draw for "work" like Patreon buttons. I don't seek out commissions because I'm afraid I don't have the motivation to complete them. My work is here: http://voidburger.deviantart.com/

 

[RisingPhoenix]

What's funny is that she doesn't even do freelance artwork anymore:

In fairness the art market is tricky to break into, but unless she cleaned her DA up a lot, she didn't post very much to attract attention. It's a shame because she can draw half decent (though I suppose if you go to art college then that should be expected) - but also hella lazy.

 

[TiggerNits]

I'm just curious why people keep asking her opinions on things.

Seeing how much rope is "just enough rope", I think

 

[BlueChan]

In fairness the art market is tricky to break into, but unless she cleaned her DA up a lot, she didn't post very much to attract attention. It's a shame because she can draw half decent (though I suppose if you go to art college then that should be expected) - but also hella lazy.

Frankly, even considering how much depression and her interest in Let's Plays factors into killing her desire to draw, I get the feeling her tendency to get into Internet slapfights played a larger part than she'd like to admit.

Semi-related, a while back I found an argument she had with a random Twitter user back in late 2014 (again, during the height of her crusade against GamerGate). I initially brushed it off as not that interesting, but then I happened upon an archived /v/ thread that unexpectedly gave some background information:

Spoiler: Further discussion from that /v/ thread

 

[Pointless Pedant]

I'd be surprised if VoidSperger knew many black people. They'd tell her to calm down on the social justice issues.

 

[RJ MacReady]

It's amusing how intimidated she is by that guy just because he's black. Really took the wind out of her sails.

 

[Pointless Pedant]

It's amusing how intimidated she is by that guy just because he's black. Really took the wind out of her sails.

It's shockingly racist of her.