Let's Sperg Let's plays awful, and or mediocre games. - There a ton of them out there. (Starting with Virus: It's aware)

[ChucklesTheJester]

Once Again the Evil Magic of Mediocre games has brought me back to life.

Countdown Vampires Part 7 :

This update's music recommendation another classic from when I was a child.

Spoiler: Videos

Spoiler: The LP

When we last left off. Something Something long backtracks something something vampires.

Ahh Yes we got a chainsaw. To cut a chain. Isn't that a bit too literal of a thing? Maybe it just a pun. Oh also fun fact. First chainsaw was made to help child birth.

This hunter a bit slow.

Look at that slow reaction time before it started moving.

This Ivan ooze taught me something new about this game. See I was as I am always super tired when doing the recording when I found out they can do this.

Mother fucker hugged me. Just call me Venkman because " HE SLIMED ME!"

Seriously after all the backtracking we had to do the game spawns more shit in our way. Sure Ivan oozes was not here before but this shit makes the padding worse then it already was.

Oh yeah hunters here now rather then vampires.

Now we can do something with this stupid thing here.

Now we have a puzzle to solve. Well more like "puzzle"

AN YOU MATCH THE COLORS KEITH?

Yes it's that simple. but what happens if we get it wrong?

Literally nothing bad happens other then telling us we got it wrong.

When we try to open this door.

Fucking stop following me you clinger.

It's outside of a dam. I was a bit confused at first as well.
Anyway we go in and

Fucking hell. No way back now.

This area a big old sqaure doesn't mater if you go up or left

That door doesn't open.

You get to here and to the top right is

A elevator.

So get this shit Suddenly the bugman are strong enough to BUST THE FLOOR OF A MOVING ELEVATOR.

and well this new found strength translates into nothing gameplay wise. One magnum shot and the mantis gives the average person reaction to reading the main story for Pokemon Reborn.

Thank god it busted the wall at the top floor for this elevator.

Seriously she hurt her ankle getting out of the elevator.

Thank god she listens this time.

Ignore the red light to the right that's end game related.

The game starts to give us a lot of items.

There weirdly a record keeping room in this dam.

Then again maybe it's just a office.

America moment where ammo is just laying around everywhere.

Also a vending machine.

What is semi important is this item here.

Here the thing I need to question. Why? This is far enough removed from the location we found the LMG that you have to question why is this here? Like if we found the LMG inside the dam, I could see who ever had this part left it here before putting it on the LMG. But now we got to assume they also lived in the village outside of the dam? God I really need to stop going on stupid nitpicky tangents.

This really doesn't make the gun useful. So uh enjoy a gun you likely wont use.

Pointless room but cool you can examine this and get a text. Bit of world building.

The Dam is I guess on backup power. That or only a few fuses in the box.

Anyone who has watched the AVGN video might remember this room.

or to be more exact this part.

As much as I dislike AVGN video on this game, he does bring up a few good points in the video. The weird backtracking and pointless padding like this section is very annoying.

God I love the railing. You know somewhere in this universe they had to make damn sure they was following OSHA guidelines to keep the whole secret evil lab shit hidden.

So I was thinking of something about the vampires. So you need to be sprayed with the evil black goop to be turned into one right? Do you think they infected the water supply and that's why the sprinklers was shooting out the stuff? or is this like a resident evil story and gameplay seperation deal. Where you the main chracter can be bit a million times over and never infected.

More of them also come from off screen here.

Going down!

Look how long this fucking hall was. There a point where it just feels unnesscary and padding.

We need to go down the stairs, but there also a locked door if we keep going downwards off screen.

The game has mostly run out of new ideas at this point and just throwing a bit of everyone at us now.

That bubble from a enemy that down a even longer hallway we don't need to go down quite yet but it's good to mention there like 2-3 more oozes that way.

While I don't need that item. Just uh watch keith's alzheimer act up while I try to grab it.

Also shout out to that ooze that sniped me.

Inside the door behind us.

God damn werewolfs.

Ton of em as well

Quite literally almost die here.

Door top will never open but we can go to the side here for.

A key.

But more importantly a cut scene.

I love how at this point if keith hears a shotgun rack behind him he knows who it is.

This is the first frame default pose for Buffy the Vampire humper here.

My god Keith, I am fucking autistic and I know the connection by this point.

METAL GEAR!

We call this a Eclipse and it just happened a couple months or so ago.

Where the hell did Vampire Hunter Dork get a picture of the earth from on the moons surface? What he bring out a projector or something and just displaying these images to Keith mid talk?

Just looks like a night day in a American city to me.

KIETH YOU DUMB MOTHER FUCKER. YOU ARE LITERALLY FIGHTING VAMPIRES, WEREWOLFS, BUG PEOPLE, GOD DAMN SLIME MONSTERS. Why are you asking like this is too far fetched?

Thank you.

To think hololive's Ayame was the vampire hunter this whole time.

He says as his shotgun snaps to his hand.

Same thing we do every update keith. Wander around aimlessly.

We got some items down here including a new map.

Despite that door being yellow at the bottom we can't open it. Interesting to note is it connects to the first room we came in.

Going down this way and

We can use the key to open this door.

Very nice room. Some more items and another map.

This maps a lot more useless.

While there is a door is where we go next, not quite yet.

I just love the way these windows look.

Up we go

To our next save room, but we aint stopping here we are going till the end.

Few items in here and only one is semi important.

This item is part of a side thing to make extra powerful bullets. We still lacking two other items to go with this.

Going out this door.

This is a real cool looking location. How often do you see a Dam at night in video games.

New type of ammo for a new gun we will find later.

Yup a whole hidden lab inside this dam.
We can go to the right here.

That there is ammo but to the right

Hidden in the corner on the floor is.

Now I know what you thinking. That description sounds a bit scary and annoying. This is the one thing this game does better then other games with Nitroglycerin in it (Re1 remake, and castlevina 64). THIS SHIT DOESN'T EXPLODE. Run all you want, shoot all you want, no tedious item escort quest here.

I know out of all things I didn't expect this game to get this shit right.

If we go this way down here.

Then go up

This is I assuming also a connection to the game they did before this.

I like to think that because the police are in on it, that 3 and 4 is the real reason why Keith was made a bodyguard.

A new human for a new century.

Before we go, a fun detail to spot is the picture here on the desk. We will be seeing her later so it is cool we get a sneak peak now.

On the other side of this giant ass room.

Also a computer that is turned on.

This is the locked door by the stairs I mentioned way earlier.

Look who is back the god damn bug people must have came from that door we just opened.

It was at this point I just started to use the magnum to oneshot all these freaks.

Real gangbang of em as well.

I go down, and then back up

(Yes these guys have re spawned which is why I only killed the one before)

To reset the bugman's position to make him a bit easier to try to bypass.

He still almost kills me and I end up killing him anyway whoops.

And I do mean almost killing me I am very much one or two hits away from biting it.

So of couse the next room has the one enemy I despise the most in it.
Have a listen.

I still kick his ass but fuck em.

We pop in that door there.

More bugs.

Seems to be the real holding cells for these monsters.

Inside we get our last of the 3 items needed for the special sided thing.

Silver bullet casein.

now we head this way

Down a hallway that could have been shortened.

To a corpse disposal room.

That item on the left over there is just more ammo.

Hmmmmm Getting a Keycard from a room where the Evil corp is disposing of bodies?

Don't boss fights in here, but makes you question with how much this game already references, and homages other horror movies, and games if this was a intentional nod to Re3, or purely a coincidence

With all 3 side quest items in hand we going to go

down

another

Overly

Long

hallway.

Bunch of items in here but on the table is our real goal.

But first let's examine the cases we picked up

We get a new limited type of ammo.
We only get one clip worth as well.

In the corner to the right is also a new gun.

TIME TO FIND OUT IF THE AMMO WAS WROTH IT.

So here a ooze.

He has 76 Hp.

Normal Magnum shot drops him to

While our new limited ammo drops him to

at full HP.

So doing the math the new ammo does double damage. Yeah not fucking worth it for the time wasted.

Another fun thing to mention is this

Found this by accident as well Also why I think the Gl might be a reskin of the Magnum with less damage but AOE(I have no idea if it has AOE, as I just stick with the magum as it already one shots bugmen).

Now with the card we can open this giant door

This is another one of those pointless rooms that could have been cut.


Now it is time for some Lore.

Oh No. NO NO NO. is she back?

Oh thank god, it's just some other random girl who says his name like her.

Is this a insult or a compliment, ah who cares we likely added another 100+ bodies to that count at this point from this game alone.

WE'RE STAR FOX!

So you are the games bootleg wesker then?

Wait but does this mean the "white water" is also artificial blood? Because it's the same black blood but lit on fire? Or would the fire alter it and it is no longer blood?

His coffin was under water next to a dam? Weird but sure.

I hope that not in the literal sense.

Little late on that one Keith .

I can get behind this girl.

YOU SEE SNAKE, YOU GOT ALL THE DOMINATE GENES, WHILE I GOT ALL THE RECESSIVE GENES.

You say that, but these monsters keep fucking respawning.

She then presses a button and we see this

Looks kind of normal-ish

OH MY GOD IT'S THE ALIEN HUMAN HYBRID FROM ALIENS RESURRECTION!
You all seen that movie right?

Anyway so this new monster, what do you think it could do?

What if I told you it was tiny white hunters that from afar look like they hugging you.

Well this does confirmed that GL has AOE. Good thing I tested it here.

After they all dead we can walk around the room and look the tubes. Thankfully none of these things pop out of the tube.

We need to head to this room.

We get yet another new gun.

Going down from the door we came in now.

Bunch of sleeper units I think. Cool.

Another containment room.

This opens the coffin room.

One of these is ammo for our new gun.

That's right we get more ammo of this new gun then the special ammo for the magnum.

I love this weapon.

Now for a boss fight.

So this is a witch

They and I kid you not makes a Kamahamaha motion and shoot a ball at light at Keith that puts him into a floating crucifix pose.

Fun thing about this line, if you listen to the audio they say "right" meaning this is a case of Japanese mixing L and R up.

Legends of Localization: The Problem with L, R, and Other Letters in Japanese Translation

There's actual logic behind all those Japanese game typos, and it goes beyond L and R.

legendsoflocalization.com

it's like a reverse gusher. Slurp.

What happen next makes me laugh every fucking time I see it.

The fucking M bison dive and the scream. God this game makes me flip flop between this game is trying to be serious but with cheesey voice acting story (like RE), or a parody of the then still fresh SH genre.

Notice there already a bit of blood there before.

Yeah he is 100% dead look at that gush of blood. That is that like 3 humans worth of blood?

Now we have to fight these 3 bitches.

Fuck this battle. No really Fuck it.

I hate this battle.

They just naturally like to zoom the fuck around.

And if you try to shoot them while they not in a attack animation they dodge your attack by zooming.


So these witches has 4 attacks (really 3 because 2 of them are the same attack with a different projectile)

They can

Ball

Ball but it's now a triangle

Legend of zelda puzzle chest block you.

or

They can M bison you as well.

If you happen to land enough hits on the same one to kill it.

They turn into the fire dancer from the LoZ OoT Fire Dungeon for a quick second.

Oh and the worst part of this whole fucking boss battle.

THEY NEVER STOP FUCKING LAUGHING.

I wont subject you to it if you don't watch the full minute long versions. But just know if you havn't already watched the full battle you are saving your ears from. "HEHEHEHHE" on loop FROM THREE DIFFERENT ENEMIES.

Btw during this battle and after you can pick up this object in the middle of the floor.

I think this implies Vampire The Masquerade Hunter had it before they died.

I have no idea if you can just leave after picking it up and not fight them.

Anyway let's keep going.

back over here past the pointless double ladder part.

We find out on the next screen is

one of the little bastards Kill it and move on.
Once we made it back to the room the fuse is used in this happens.

This time no timer starts. but yes THIS GAME HAS 2 FUCKING THE PLACE IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE MESSAGES said by a automated voice.


Look who comes in stage right

Let's go put the fuse in now with her following.

when we press the button

In side we find more little fuckers. and we are at a close enough angle this time that uh. The hug attack now looks like this.

Welcome to a parking lot with more of these guys.

This room was basically the breather room before the last boss.

Me and the boys when we lock eyes in a pokemon game.

There kind of a weird awkward pause here while the witch in the back looks like they talking.

Keith when asked what he thinks of the plot of Countdown Vampires.

Guess fucking what IT'S LITERALLY JUST THE SAME FIGHT AGAIN BUT THIS TIME WITH A 5 MINUTE TIMER.

Fuck that. I aint gonna show you this. There literally no difference aside from the timer.

And I beat them with over 3 minutes to spare.

It then pans down to show

It looks like they turned into boiling soup.

And get this shit the game turns to her and Misato says.

Literally the Good ending has a fake out fake out in it.

They share a passionate kiss as the camera pans up to the moon

ROLL CREDITS.

I will like to mention that I love to think that during the motion capture for this game. Someone had to do the doofy crouch walking the vampires do while in full git up. God I love motion capture.

And Yes we did infact do good enough to unlock the special mode and it's extra cut scenes.

I still have no idea what lucky coins even do.

Time to show off something.

So WHAT HAPPENS IF WE DON'T KILL THE BITCHES IN TIME?

It's not a game over, but the dam still explodes.

All the water rushes away.

revealing the coffin

Spoiler: Strobing light

Just fucking poofs.

And gells descends in a UFO of light.

The last what? Cop, Human? Vampire hunter?

Person willing to play this game?

Then he just erupts in a green fire as he transforms.

And we see gell's TRUE FORM

BHAHAHHA. Look at this fucking final fansty final boss looking ass reject.

Despite the looks he doesn't fuck around. he has 2 moves.

First one is a dash claw attack. The second one is.

SPAMS LIGHTING ALL OVER.

This is meant to be a unwinnable boss fight. You can beat him and get the good ending as if you just beat the witches normally. But losing to him and we get the bad end.

That's it for now.

NEXT TIME Will hopefully be a shorter update where I show off all the new cut scenes added that both expand the plot and some how make it baffling worse at the same time.

 

[Mary the Goldsmith]

So this is now over and I'm extremely confused I'm gonna have to reread the LP

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

So this is now over and I'm extremely confused I'm gonna have to reread the LP

It's not truly over We still have the extra even more confusing extra cutscenes from Special mode which INCLUDES THE TRUE ENDING.

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

Countdown Vampires Part 8(End): The plot goes completely off rails.

Spoiler: AltTitle

No Main Video as this will be extra few cutscenes, and other stuff I know about added in special mode. So I am going to also use cheats and gameshark codes for the first Disc just so I can do this fast. Most of the new content is in Disc 2 anyway.

This updates music Recommendation gonna be a bit weirder then normal. Rather then just A song. I recommend this whole album.
The Wozard of Iz

Spoiler: Beware Ye who enters, for the rest of the plot has come.

First thing to note. In special mode Stun Glove(globe) does like double damage. But like who cares I have cooler range weapons to mention.

So because this is the special episode I have cheated in the inf ammo guns unlocked from the hidden Prince of Darkness mode I will get into later. The third gun is just a INF ammo LMG I cheated in that isn't unlocked from that mode, I just wanted to test it during this second play though. Even with inf ammo it sucked.

The other two weapons are.

Literally A machine gun version of the Grenade launcher It's pretty broken as fuck able to end enemies and some bosses in seconds.

This is the inf ammo shotgun. It says extra strength shots but in testing sometimes I could oneshot werewolf and hunters, sometimes I couldn't.

Still a pretty good weapon.

And with that out of the way the first new cut scene comes really quick. AND IT'S PEOPLE WHO WE SAW IN THE INTRO.

I wont completely go though each cutscene like I normally do, but I will highlight parts of them.

First frame models never get old showing off.

I also made sure to equip the biggest gun I had to make this look more funny.

We also learn the name of our VIP, who died.

I wanted to high light this because. Wouldn't SWAT team have some idea who the police officers are and vice verse. Part of the same police force right?

The line reading on this one. help US OUT!

Next thing to note is We can now get lucky coins from these machines there 5 of them in total. Getting all 5 and a S rank unlocks the PRINCE OF DARKNESS mode.

These are the other 2 lucky coin machines in Disc 1.

I like how I can't even tell what he screaming moon coin says.

Anyway ALL THE WAY AT THE END OF DISC 1 RIGHT BEFORE THE BOSS.

There is a new note.

Just placed at the door. There might be more hidden notes in disc 1 but I don't know where. I know there is one I do show off in Disc 2.

This is legitimately my reaction to reading this for the first time.

It starts out okay, but as soon as it mentions Gells. I feel like I suddenly have a stroke, or jules had one. Like it makes it sound like GELLs (The fucking vampire) IS A WANTED CRIMINAL, and the van being out of gas is because of gells, or it is gells. Then it says Our resident VanHellsing stand is gells. AND HE TELLS US OUT OF NOWHERE MIND YOU, THAT HE(jules in this case) HAS QUITE LITTERALLY KILLED A TON OF PEOPLE.
AND THEN SAYS THE VAN HAS A SPARE TANK OF GAS NOW AND HIM AND SCHRECK GONNA USE THE POLICE HELICOPTER. THAT A THING NOW I GUESS.

Am I going insane? Is my austism somehow effecting how I read a normal ass letter?

Anyway, there a new disc 1 boss. Remember how I mention the green bug likely was that one H name in that one letter many updates back, and how it also mentioned a mutant called "Big shot".

It starts out normal, but then the giant ass metal door in the parking room.

Starts to get punched by something.

If the orginal boss was a Mutated Mantis man, this fucker is a mutant Werewolf.

and his chest hole opens up TO A MOUTH THING.

Hey wanna know why this boss fight was hidden away?

It also unleashes it's inner deviantart artists and vores you with it's chest mouth.

BigShot: I LOVE YOU THIS MUCH.

When we beat him it's mostly the normal end of disc 1 cutscene but there a added part. Right after they get out of the area, This plays.

The look on his face and hand movesments. While he doesn't say anything you can easily imagine he saying. " Did he really just leave us?"

Oh and encase you guys don't remembers what happens at the end of disc one. Here a refresher.

They have to be dead right? The whole place exploded.

Anyway onto disk 2.

The first time we enter the diner we meet.

FF7 Arith if she was in ada's cocktail dress. She is also from the intro. Shocking I know. Her first name is Mira.

How Normal people talk.

They are still treating gells like a normal person. One you can arrest.

Anyway Mira will follow us around this room like a second clinger on. There also our 4th lucky coin here

Nothing new happens untill we get inside the dam.

But before that also inside the dam I came across a weird bug with the enemy AI.

You could say it's a real ZOMBIE JAMBOREE

Press X to JULES!

SHAUN! SHAAAAAAAAUN!

Also HOW THE FUCK DID HE SURIVE THAT EXPLOSION?

Are you guys ready for Mira's tragic backstory?

That's right Gells (Or I guess in this case VanDorkSing who everyone is calling gells now) killed her sister?


Onto the next cutscene.

Man I wonder who it is given what we know of the first play though story.

Me when my brain is leaking out my ears towards the end of this update.

KEITH YOU ARE MAKING IT WORSE, EVERY TIME YOU FUCKING TALK OF GELLS IT GETS MORE CONFUSING.

They also look at the photo on the deck I pointed out before.

Well enough of this one We are getting closer and closer to the juicy one that turns this game into a mediocre

We have one before this game goes off the fucking rails.

This is the room we got that 50. sniper in on Special mode the other new note I know about spawns here.

This is far better then the other note.

So anyway after we get the project sin key which leads to the coffin fight and get back into that room we first saw the baby cock sucking hunters in this happens.

We find shnek in a cyro tube and we wake him up.

HUH DIDN'T YOU GET CAUGHT IN THE EXPLOSION AT THE END OF DISC ONE?

VAMPIRE CENTER? THE FUCK IS THAT? I must have missed some note or something.

WHY DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HIS FAMILY?

Yeah man get going.

Is it just me or does his head slightly tilt down when he walks away? Like he disappointed he couldn't come with us?

I hope you are fucking ready Because this next one which I am hyping up GOES OFF THE FUCKING RAILS. This one plays when we try to leave the coffin room after killing the 3 family members.

I implore if you don't watch any of the video clips WATCH THIS ONE, PLEASE WATCH IT.

Btw if you listen closely he says "Game over, Death God".

What

And all 3 of them get put into a Iron maiden minus the spikes coffin on the wall.

That's right the person who we first thought might have been this games bootleg wesker isn't.
No it's fucking jules of all people that is the wesker of this game.

Sure it's hammy and a weird plot twist but it isn't that bad so far.

Food? What?

Mind you he laughing and hamming it up this whole time saying this insane plot twist backstory shit. We are not even at the tip of the insanity yet.

THAT'S RIGHT THIS WHOLE TIME, THE GUY KEPT HOLDING US AT GUN POINT WAS IN REALITY KIETH'S TWIN SISTER.

It really is funny in a unintentional way.

WHAT? FUCKING WHAT HOW DID THIS LEAD TO HIM WANTING TO BECOME THE PRESIDENT? ALL THESE PLOT TWISTS AND REVEALS AND SUDDENLY HE WANTS TO BE THE PRESIDENT?

Thank god he back to talking sense. Wait GOD DAMN IT.

Thankfully Mira comes to save the day by putting a end to the inmates running the asylum known as the writers room.

The look he gives him says it all. " Did that really just happen?, and shneks shrug.

Dead.

Wow Keith saying something smart for once. This cut scene (Btw this cutscene is over 5 minutes) has it fucking all.

WHAT? FUCKING WHAT KIETH? THAT NOT HOW BRAINWASHING WORKS.

The coffin then shuts.

And that's the end of this cutscene.

Next stuff happens during the final boss.
I only showed screenshots last time of what happens when the countdown reaches 0 in the second boss fight so here the full video video of it.

Anyway we have to lost to gells now rather then get the bad ending we get.

Despite now being a vampire. We still use guns, and the boss fight is basically the same, and not worth showing off.

Beating gells we get the TRUE ENDING.

Because I got all 5 lucky coins and got a S rank we unlock prince of darkness mode where we play as a alt timeline vampire keith who has a new melee attack, and we have 20 minutes to kill a bunch of civs, swats team members and even ending with us killing Jane.

Here the full mode with me using Hp cheats just to beat it. It's basically a worse version of mercenaries from RE3

Next time I will give my full thoughts and a rateing on COUNTDOWN VAMPIRES. I hope the insanity that is this game was worth it.

 

[Tari]

Didn't know that you had an LP thread. What the hell am i even reading, and how do i get more?

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

Didn't know that you had an LP thread. What the hell am i even reading, and how do i get more?

Just a side hobby of mine. Bad, awful, mediocre games. When a game tries to reach heights and fails it can at times be more enjoyable then a good game. Be it from any another of reasons. Low Budget, over ambition, mismanagement, Baffling game design decisions, what ever the cause. Good games tend to be a bit too polished, the faults filed off just enough that they don't give you the same enjoyment as a game that is rough. You get to see things you likely would never see in a game that is considered good, because these games try to break the mold and then faceplant.

The worst thing a game can be is boring. Which is one reason I dislike walking sims. If I wanted to do nothing, but sometimes read a story, I would play a visual novel.

 

[Tari]

You get to see things you likely would never see in a game that is considered good, because these games try to break the mold and then faceplant.

I couldn't agree more. Even though they're both bad, terrible games are more enjoyable than goyslop in an ironic sense.

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

I couldn't agree more. Even though they're both bad, terrible games are more enjoyable than goyslop in an ironic sense.

If anyone was interested there are wiki's dedicated type of thing. The now gone Crappy games wiki(RIP) was one of them .

A Japanese wiki has both Good, bad, and in between. https://w-atwiki-jp.translate.goog/...l=auto&_x_tr_tl=en&_x_tr_hl=en&_x_tr_pto=wapp

There also the youtube channel/website BadGameHallOfFame Which also covered bad games, sometimes with background history, and at a way faster rate then I do.

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

Countdown Vampires: Closing statement.

I Feel I need to give a separate rating for the First and second play though because the extra story does change it a lot.

Spoiler: Gameplay in General

I think game play wise, CDV is a fine for survivor horror standards of the time. If you was a fan of the genre it's worth a shake if you have are on a classic SH kick.
As someone who enjoys tank controls and classic SH, I find it very hard to fuck up the basics. The closest so far was Evil Dead HtTK but even then it was bearable.
One gripe I do have is some items can be a real pain to pick up, as I did show case before. The first boss is rather fun when you get down what he does, but god damn does the other bosses not work well for SH.

The family is just a ADHD person's nightmare having to keep track of 3 separate bosses and hope the auto aim locks onto the right one at the right time, so it doesn't just auto dodges your attacks.

Gells is just no, just no. He suffers from the same problem the last boss of ED:HtTK did, and ends up just as a spam all your healing items. He also very cheap boss. Coming right out of the gate with a dash attack before the screen fully fades in. If I wasn't using inf HP cheats I would have to taken all my healing items and even buy out the venders to beat him. His lighting while random doesn't hit all that often outside of standing still, which can be frustrating. And his super rare third attack, I see it so rarely I don't know the gimmick behind it outside of it being hellzone grenade from DBZ.

BigShot(The werewolf boss) just suffers from too big of hitboxs for his arm attack. He should be called Big Slap with the wave he slaps you all over the place like a three stooges gag.

The enemies are fine, and there enough of them that by disc two the games does try switching up encounters sometimes.

Vampires: Depending on the moon they act like classic extremely slow zombies,Resident Evil Zombies, 28 days later fast zombies, or Drunk people that shit themselfs and are slight hopping at you, while trying to stay in a hunched over posture so the rest doesn't leak out. If anything the 4th version is the closest to a real vampire because of Chinese Jiangshi(Hopping Vampire).

Mantis: They a nice mix up from Vampires, giving them a real long hop so they can close the distance unlike vampires.

Bat: FUCK THESE ENEMIES, FUCK EM. Annoying I don't like them.

Werewolf: Just slow walk at you big hunky roadblock.



Slime(Ivan ooze): Neat idea to have a enemy that basically acts like a turret. Sadly also means you don't see them often.

Hunter: Two dashes RE hunter, One dash seasonal flu. First time you fight one doesn't really showcase it's power.

Baby Hunters:

Human: Unquie enemy to prince of darkness mode. Comes in two types. No attack, run away, and Second Amendment User which has 4 sub types.(Traq, handgun, Shotgun, Rifle).

The Type with the gun basically attacks like the witches do when it comes to dodges, but has a cool dodge roll animation. Real shame YOU ARE FORCED TO MELEE THEM IN THIS MODE.


Most of the weapons are fine, if not redundant towards the end.

You get the grenade launcher so late you replace it in less then a hour with something better.

The only two weapons I think suck outright is Stun Glove(Globe), and the LMG. Melee is useless and unlike in RE even fails as a last ditch weapon because of how much ammo the game gives you. And the LMG just sucks even after the upgrade. The only thing LMG has going for it, is no ammo cap so it's always 1 space while other weapons are 2 spaces.

The Rare Crafted ammo for the magnum while cool is also pointless, you have no need in using it outside of reaping what you sowed.

Spoiler: First Play though Story

The story you get when playing the first go around is fine. It's stupid, and when you first see all the enemies you do question if this game is serious or a parody of resident evil. We have Van HellDork I still think is a highlight just the voice changer, and so many quotable lines. Misato aside from being a reference to the game before this one, really doesn't do much. I am kind of glad the devs don't like escort quests so keep her from being annoying, or ran out of time(I will get more into why I think this later) so left her as just location based follower.

Hell you don't even get to see like half of the cast from the intro so you are left questioning what was the point. The puzzles the few and far between end up being brain dead easy, or mental gymnastics, or a bit of trial and error. There a maybe like one I think off the top of my head I really liked, and that would be the cell door puzzle. It's not too hard you would be stuck questioning why you play this game, but not too easy I would call it braindead. I would say I fucking despise the whole puzzle(s) related to opening the evil house.

Like with Resident evil they later retconned the whole Spenser mansion as designed with all the puzzles as traps and shit by a mad genius designer hired by Spenser , with the traps being there to contain the outbreak or stop people who shouldn't be in those areas. Also something something Wesker, something something combat data. It's all stupid, but there some disbelief you can suspend, the game is meant to be super campy like a cheesy horror movie.

it's harder to do with Countdown vampires. Like sure a puzzle to the hidden underground lab, okay what ever, but WHY THE FUCK DO I NEED TO DO A TON OF FUCKING BULLSHIT TO OPEN THE EVIL HOUSE. First you need a key to unlock both the table with giant cards , and the clock puzzles behind the painting in a room not even related to the evil house. I need to get a keno card with a very certain numbers somewhere else also unrelated to the evil house. That unlock a safe with giant card halfs that are used in the clock puzzle, that give me clock hands, I must then do math with the giant cards on the table to get the time I must set clock hands to in the entrance to the evil house. Also the Entrance to the evil house also was locked with a key you had to find. It's just a drawn out convoluted puzzle that wouldn't make sense in the setting the game takes place. The Evil house is a Hotel PEOPLE ARE MEANT TO STAY IN, WHY WAS IT LOCKED LIKE THIS WHEN THE OUTBREAK HAPPEN? Like you later learn the whole event was a trap to test the synthetic vampire blood, but like WHY WOULD THEY THEN DESIGN A WAY TO UNLOCK EVERYTHING ANYWAY.

You have to jump to so many conclusions that you lose any suspension of disbelief. Feels too video gamey.

The game also double dips on it's main influence RE with not one but two fucking countdowns to things exploding. With a automated voice telling you things about to explode and to escape. Speaking of the countdowns, The ones where everything doesn't explode, Kieth just has a random heart attack if the countdown reaches 0 and dies. Like what the hell.

Gells is very much as a whole a nothing burger of a villain. The whole time you hear GELLS THIS, GELLS THAT, like he some big threat. But when you meet gells he says " Looks like you are the last one" and transforms into his final fantasy final boss OC cosplay. It's just a cheap boss, not intimidating, the "family" as Jane calls them is just the same 3 characters but copy and pasted and serve more as a annoyance. Like I SURE HOPE YOU LIKE THE FIRST TIME YOU HAD TO FIGHT THEM BECAUSE THEY THE FINAL BOSS FOR THE GOOD ENDING, OR IF YOU WANTED TO CHECK OUT GELLS, YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE BULLSHIT FOR 5 FUCKING MINUTES. I swear I am gonna have Nam flash backs if I hear the witch crackle again.

The only part of the whole normal story that stands out to me accidentally funny is when Alicia starts talking about the synthetic vampire blood and how it was a failure, and how they will take Gells blood to make new humans. She Believes in the power of DNA, but not silly myths, after all, a dead person is dead. Like it feels like it was meant to be a plot twist like how in RE wesker turns out to be evil.

A lot of the notes you find give background info on places you visit in the second disk, they fine. A bit of world building, doesn't really help much when the story is already as piss poor as it is, but it does something.

If you can ignore the story, and are a fan of classic RE, or classic SH style in general and looking for a game to wet your whistle Countdown vampires works.

With that I say it's a 3 out of 5 dead VIPs.

Spoiler: Special Story mode

What the fuck happen to this games story? The new stuff you learn turns it from stupid and meh into. FUCKING STUPID AND INSANE.

We finally get to meet the characters we saw in the intro for like one cut scene in the first CD, and then next time we see them Kieth Straight up even forget they exist and we get the loony toons punchline when they look at each other and the building explodes. And this somehow DOESN'T KILL THEM. Not even mentioning the Note before the Boss room at the end where I swear to god, It feels like Jules had a stroke writing it, or I am reading it. It feels like these just got cut and added in a separate mode because they don't add to the story ,but take away from it, and it only gets worse in disk two.

We get to meet Mira(Kind of a funny thing to note when in a later RE Game we get a character named Moira, who is the daughter of berry.) another detective, who is looking for her lost sister and was also failed to protect her VIP like Keith. How did she survive the explosion and get out? Good question, game never answers, the only one I think has any real plausible way to survive/get out is Jane Dark. Later when we meet her again this time in the dam, we learn more about her tragic backstory who don't care about, and also gells was into Child murdering. At this point we might as well just Recolor Gells to purple, OLD SPORT.

Then we later find out from her about the CEO of the company that owns the dam. Blah Blah nothing new happens until after the family boss fight where the new story loses it's fucking shit. Jules turns out to be the games real wesker has a whole three minute fucking monologueing . While Keith Alicia and shenck(the swat partner to jules) are in Iron Maiden coffins on the wall of a room with a giant floor coffin. What he says is just off the fucking rocker nuts. Literally says he behind the attack on Shncek's wife that keith stopped, and he going to kill his family after this is over. He also spills the beans that The Masked man is really Keith's twin sister who killed his partner because she thought he was a vampire. And THEN GOES ON A SPEECH ABOUT HOW HE GOING TO ARREST HER PIN ALL THE MURDERS ON HER, GET PROMOTED, GET INTO POLITICS AND BECOME THE PRESIDENT. BUT BEFORE HE DOES ALL THIS HE GOING TO TAKE THE BLOOD OF GELLS AND INJECT IT INTO HIS VEINS BECAUSE THAT'S HOW MAGIC POWERFUL BLOOD WORKS .

First time I saw it my jaw dropped and I had to watch it a second time. This and when you see how disjointed the true ending feels and is put together clicked in my head. I figured out the real reason why this was all put into it's own mode you had to beat the game with a S rank to unlock. It's unfinished. And being unfinsihed is likely why I flip flopped back to this game isn't a parody IT'S DEAD SERIOUS. It just needed more time in the oven, time and money they likely didn't have, and so they cut what they could to make a semi understandable plot and made that the first thing you see.

I give this mode a 2 out of 5 BECOMING THE PRESIDENT.

Over all if you ever do end up playing Countdown vampires, just do one playthough It's not worth the second, it's far better just to watch someone else play it at that point for the few new cutscenes.

Spoiler: The rateing system

1 is for bland games, they just have nothing that interesting about them. They come and go, and you likely forget about them by tomorrow. Example: Any number of the mid to late 2000's Mud Brown, and Earthy colored military shooters. They not as bad as stuff like Virus:It's aware, but god damn you rather be playing or watching someone play Virus and laugh at the game then fall asleep out of boredom.

Walking simulators that take themselves too seriously go here as well. Look if you want to tell a story with out giving the player any action, write a real novel, or make a visual novel. Don't subject players to utter boredom of what it feels like to play Skyrim,FO3/NV/FO4/ES4 if you take out all the enemies.

Sidenote: Walking sims are just lazyer, lower effort, point and click adventure games IMO. I have respect for Point and Click adventures games, but not for Walking sims.

2 Is a game that I personally can not recommend to everyone who wants to play a game that isn't considered good. Be it just bad design, horrendous bugs, or any of the other number of ways a game might shit the bed. You can still get joy out playing/watching these games going in wanting to laugh at goofy stuff happening. Example: Virus: It's aware.

3 is a game that while not as bad as a game under 2 rating, I can only reasonably recommend to people who are interested in the genre, or if it's a licensed title, what it was based on. Stuff like Evil Dead Hail to the King. You could easily see a game like this could be way better if made at a later date, had more time in the oven, or by a different team.

4 is a game I can recommend to everyone in this thread to go out and play. It's not a 10/10 coom all over the walls of your room game, but I think anyone who picked it up could have a reasonably fun time with it if you play with a open mind. Stuff like Halo 1, The first FNAF game. House of the dead games.

5 is only for the super rare game that despite all it's flaws bad design, or else has endeared me so hard I can't help but love it.

Not sure when I am going to start deep fear, I might go back to playing Wack a bit, or a Ao Oni Game I missed like 2. I don't really know fully what my plans are right now. I hope you enjoyed this shit show of a game.

 

[Dysnomia]

There's a fan translation of R?MJ: The Mystery Hospital out now. I played it in Japanese since it doesn't really requite any reading to complete. But I want to play it in English so I understand the plot better and that bizarre ending. I don't understand what happens with Misato at all.

If you try it you'll love the one guy in the game that speaks English.

​

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

Now I haven't started deep fear yet. I need some opinions on this before I do.

The game doesn't look that good raw like even for 1998 this is rough.

Didn't know minecraft steve became a life guard.

Anyway The emulator I am using (Kronos core for Retro arch) let's me upscale it so it looks like this.

Far better.

And next I will have 4 videos of the same cutscene (all of them the up scaled version) but 1 with no shader, and 3 with different shaders. And I want your honest opinions which one I should go with when I do get down and dirty and make this LP.

(no Filter)

(RetroArch CRT TV Shader/Filter) (Side Note this one while I think looks best, might be too taxing for the emulator while recording causing the weird sound issues )

(CRT Royal)

(A simple Composite scanlines filter)

So Tell me which one of these do you think I should go with, or if you want me to do the wacky option of No Filter, No Up scaling, and deal with MineCraft Steve looking ass life guard. (Consider option 5 here as Raw Dogging the game)

 

[Mary the Goldsmith]

I'm torn between option 2 and 4, Option 2 for the retro feel, but option 4 looks pretty good I think, I'm gonna say go with 4 so we don't have weird sound bugs

 

[Farmer9876]

Option 3, becouse it will be really funny if you complete entire game with those black lines blocking screen. Extra difficultly so to speak.

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

I'll give it a another day or two before I I am sure which filter I will be going with.

On top of that I will like to ask you guys another question.

Do you think I should nab one of these audio filters?

I was thinking of using Composite Clean Stereo As I personally think that sounds best with older games.

Or Would you prefer I do a funny and go for RF Dirty for that Old TV feeling. Or none of them for pure raw audio As I have been doing with the games before this.

Thank God Retro Crisis exists and puts so much work into things like this.

 

[Pepe Cortisona]

I don't remember audio on RF being that muffled. I'll say that for clarity sake go with the clean stereo option. Let's experience the top notch soundtrack with the so bad it's so good dub as best as possible.

 

[ChucklesTheJester]

I don't remember audio on RF being that muffled. I'll say that for clarity sake go with the clean stereo option. Let's experience the top notch soundtrack with the so bad it's so good dub as best as possible.

The best dub ever.

Just hear DuBois voice.

One might even say dis dub is TERRIBLE, oh what are we gonna do!

You aint finding gay rep like this now a days.

 

[Pepe Cortisona]

Deep Fear, being more incluse than modern games since 199X.

 

[Pepe Cortisona]

@ChucklesTheJester where art thou?

Don't tell me that you went on vacation aboard a cruiser and it got hit by a missile from a submarine.

(I know that they're called torpedoes, but in deep fear they call them missiles somehow)

 

[Tari]

@ChucklesTheJester where art thou?

Don't tell me that you went on vacation aboard a cruiser and it got hit by a missile from a submarine.

(I know that they're called torpedoes, but in deep fear they call them missiles somehow)

Last seen: November 6 2024