Let's Sperg Let's Run a Wrestling Fed! - I mean we can't be worse than Russo.

Who should we take?

  • TNA, and save them from themselves

    Votes: 3 60.0%
  • ROH, the safeish bet.

    Votes: 2 40.0%
  • NWA Smoky Mountain, the blind nostalgia choice.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    5
  • Poll closed .

Strelok

Perfectly Cromulent Poster
kiwifarms.net
Joined
May 30, 2014
As a note, the 2005 edition of it is now a freeware release to promote the game.

But Strelok, what happened to the HOI Let's Sperg? Well to put it simply, it's FUBAR, some of the mods didn't update, and even when I got it into a ramshackle existence, the underlying AI bugs caused the German AI to seize up and just sit there. HOI needs like another 6 months in the oven tbh. So instead we're going to go with a game that I know isn't going to shit on me, at least bug wise. TEW 2016.

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Total Extreme Wrestling is a every few years wrestling game created by Adam Ryland, that is essentially the wrestling world's Football Manager. It's about pulling back the curtain, taking kayfabe behind the shed and shooting it, and instead being in charge of making the show itself. By default it ships with the "Cornelverse", the no-copyrights-were-harmed fictional universe that has existed as long as the commercial version of the game has, but modders of course go and make the real world of wrestling, the most well know of which is Fleisch's, which is a crippling autisticlly detailed one where almost every of the 2000+ workers have detailed bios, 47 companies are modeled, and so on.

And so that's where we will step in, with a real world database set in July (Or August if the mod update comes out in time) 2016 going forward, with all of you helping make big decisions for who gets what belt, where to host shows, and so on, all with one simple goal, take down Vince McMahon's Empire of Evil.

The big question is of course with who? There are several ways to do this, but I've narrowed it down to three choices.

The obvious one is TNA. While never actually any good, TNA has always had the financial muscle and viewership to at least be a blip on Vince's radar, and at one point looked like it may have been the next WCW, but of course, being TNA, they completely fucked all of that up and threw it away. They still have a somewhat competent set of wrestlers, Jeff Hardy notwithstanding (And I will be running a betting pool for when he dies of a drug overdose ingame, which can totally happen), and as Booker we can make sure the biggest issues, Dixie appearing on camera, and a fetish for horrible nonsensical gimmicks, never ever happens again.

The next obvious choice is Ring of Honor. They recently got a TV deal, and are in Vince's backyard. They're still very much a company on the rise, and could be a future breakout star, if they are handled correctly. Within the last year they even moved to start having PPV events, whih means their star is firmly on the rise. Plus, unlike TNA, their office workers aren't living in a fucking warehouse right now, but instead in an actually office complex.

The third, and more obscure choice, is NWA Smoky Mountain. Yes, that NWA, or at least what little remains of it. The NWA never truly died, and many companies still held onto it's slowly decaying corpse, and Smoky Mountain is one of the new ones that have emerged from it's ashes carrying the brand name. While on it's own it's got almost nothing going for it, it does still have that sweet, sweet NWA membership which we could take advantage of by bringing in other smaller companies under our alliance umbrella.

So, what's it gonna be brothers?
 
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holy shit dude I wasted a majority of my life on the old school versions of extreme warfare damn near 18 years ago when ECW was still a thing. I had no idea"The Ryland Effect" was still at it! I would say TNA unless NWA Smokey Mountain has Cornette involved because his autism knows no bounds.
 
holy shit dude I wasted a majority of my life on the old school versions of extreme warfare damn near 18 years ago when ECW was still a thing. I had no idea"The Ryland Effect" was still at it! I would say TNA unless NWA Smokey Mountain has Cornette involved because his autism knows no bounds.

Nah Cornette is working for fucking Global Force Wrestling now, aka the thing Jeff Jarret went to after he got bored of fucking up at TNA.
 
Also I'm serious, I do want people to guess when Jeff Hardy's drug habit will fucking kill him.
 
I always liked going back in history in Extreme Wafare and trying to make ECW competitive back in 1998
 
I vote for ROHOWA.

But we're going to make our version. With hookers. And blow.
 
We're going with TNA looks like. So, let's look at how we're doing.

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As you can see, TNA isn't doing that great compared to other companies, and AAA, CMLL, DG, NJPW, and WWE are all considered more well known than us. We come in the night before the next Impact Wrestling! with crap for Prestige, crap for momentum, a bit of money in the bank (that will be sucked away over the rest of the year due to Panda Energy leaving), and as is usual for modded DBs, no actually active storylines, so it's a blank slate for us to work with. The fact that we have fallen from National to Cult is our one saving grace, as it means we aren't competing head to head with WWE anymore as far as the game is concerned. We still are competing insofar as competing for the same viewers, but we aren't in any threat of a "ratings war" situation.

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Our list of wrestlers meanwhile is below.

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Our financial projection, not even counting the money Panda will be sucking out of us, is equally dire, as we will need to make back a nearly $400,000 per month deficit in event and merchandising incomes.

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Next, we'll check out the creative meeting screen, which tells us about the current stars of our roster. Ethan Carter III is currently the best hope we have, especially considering our upcoming talent is.. yeah.

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Our schedule meanwhile, is nothing special, a weekly 2 hour show every Tuesday, and the garbage B show every Saturday. We can also see the corpse strewn field of formerly existing TNA events, like Victory Road. The important one is Slammiversary, which we have a scant 4 weeks to get ready for.

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Now let's look at the power structure, our leader and booker is me, Strelok, and as you'll note I have no skills at all besides being a booker. This means we aren't going to be Vince McMahoning it up and being King Bastard of Arsehole Mountain on screen.

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Our previous head, and now near complete owner, is the... wonderful... Dixie Carter.
Oh and btw the stats confirm my main plan. Keep Dixie away from literally everything.

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Now, onto our title holders, we still have Eli Drake holding the King of the Mountain, Sienna holding the Knockouts, Lashley holding the TNA Heavyweight, The Decay the tag belt, and Eddie Edwards holding the X Division belt.

We also do not have, and this is a new feature this edition, a figurehead. This is someone who is the focus of literally everything in the buisness, the man we build our empire and merchandising around. Our Hulkimania if you will, or as the WWE has right now John Cena. We don't have that, and frankly I don't see anyone we'd WANT to have as that, but if someone has a suggestion I'm all ears.

We also have our goals from Dixie. And as expected, she has already been a bit of a dipshit, telling us we can't hire any Cruiserweights, which means only Light Heavyweights remain for the X Division. Or we can tell her to fuck off and do it anyway. Which we probably will.

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Lastly, before we held our show, WWE Raw held theirs, and it went over fairly well it looks like, they also made Del Rio do a face turn.

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Anyway, we start with a few key questions.

Who should we build up for the title belt match at our event at the end of this month?

Are there any wrestelrs we should fire or bring on?

Should we give the entire roster a drug test just to see how many people we can flag?
 
Mini update, our first thing is a large drug battery for the entire roster, which costs us around $160,000 when all is said and done. We get 4 positive results back.

Gregory Helms: Steroids
Mike Bennet: Steroids
Jeff Hardy: Hard Drugs
Matt Hardy: Hard Drugs

For the record, there are 8 lifestyle issues, rated on a scale of 0-100. It should be noted that an occasional habit is still 0%, so if you say, have a beer at the game on the weekends, you don't rank. The 8 lifestyle choices are Smoking, Drinking, Soft Drugs, Hard Drugs, Roids, Pain Killers, Law Problems, and Religiousness, although the last one isn't usually a negative and is often a positive, excluding occasional scheduling issues. Needless to say Hard Drug use and Law Problems are the worst, as both can result in death or your wrestler going away for essentially forever.

And here are our choices for what we can do, although keep in mind firing a worker under a guaranteed contract runs the risk of a lawsuit, and of course can cause knock-on effects from morale. Note that roid users can't be sent to rehab. It should also be noted because this was all in house, there is no risk of prestige damage to the company from this, so we can very much just do a WWE style cover-up and pretend nothing is wrong.

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can you post a list of free agents? I haven't played EW since it was free, but you used to be able to sign guys to "open" contracts so they could work up to three different feds. Reform the Forever Hooligans and make them the tag champs

 
Yeah here's the list of unemployed male wrestlers who can work in the USA at the moment. Remember what I said about this DB being autisticially detailed?

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People I think would be good signings:
Charlie Haas
Jimmy Yang
Jensei Shiznaki
LA Park
Necro Butcher
Nick Dinsmore
Raven
Scott Steiner
Super Calo
Great Sasuke
Dupree and Grenier
 
People I think would be good signings:
Charlie Haas
Jimmy Yang
Jensei Shiznaki
LA Park
Necro Butcher
Nick Dinsmore
Raven
Scott Steiner
Super Calo
Great Sasuke
Dupree and Grenier

If we're trying to keep TNA clean, I'm not sure Big Poppa Pump is a wise decision. Also those disciplinary actions will take place after the broadcast of Impact!
 
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If we're trying to keep TNA clean, I'm not sure Big Poppa Pump is a wise decision.


aaron stevens (sandow)
kendrick
carly colon (carlito)
homicide
jarrett
la parka
low-ki
doug basham
nick aldis (magnus)
raven
scott steiner
blue meanie
stevie richards
trevor murdoch
 
Ok so for now we've offered a contract to Scott Stiener for $2150 per apperance, with a guaranteed $1750 a month, LA Park took a deal for $1300 an appearance with $1100 guaranteed. Sasuke took $1700 PA with $1300 guaranteed.

Jeff Jarrett played hardball and wouldn't take anything less than $3000 PA and $2250 guaranteed per month.

All of the above are only available for the "A" show and events due to their age and declining physical condition, but TNA is so garbage that's all we have anyway.

Nick Aldis drove a hard bargain, but we managed to secure him for $1800/1300, and unlike the above who we are hiring more for name recognition than actual talent, can actually still wrestle arguably, while having some on screen charm.

On the younger, and far cheaper side, we managed to preliminarily secure Dupree for $1100/800, and the Blue Meanie for $750/600.

None of these are exclusive contracts, and we won't be giving any of those untill we get a better feel for how this representation of TNA's finances are. We won't know if we get these finalized untill a few days from now, so we're going to have to make our first night with what we have. We also need to figure out a fued to start, because not having any storylines is going to hurt our ratings.

Edit: To clarify, the guaranteed money is only if we don't use them. It's not Appearances + Guaranteed money. So if we used Scott once in a month, he'd be earning $2150, not $3900.
 
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