Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Wernology]

I know I shouldn't be the least bit surprised, but after doxxing himself twice in the past few years by posting his own phone number, why would he do it a third time by not using a google voice number that forwards to his phone or something Jesus Tapdancing Christ, man.

That's rhetorical, we all know that he's a little dim.

Goddamn though, if he's this frustrating to watch without having to live with him could you just imagine the shitshow of having The Wern living in your house?

At least if you have a really stupid dog you can employ things like belly bands, crate training, muzzles, and bark collars, all of which make a hilarious and terrifying mental picture of someone trying to use them on Lucas but his dumb ass would probably think being made to wear diapers, sleep in a crate, wear a mask, and being put in a shock collar that went off any time he raised his voice is all flirting.

 

[teleméres69]

I love angry manic Lucas. But the mask kinda ruined his new video by not seeing his seething incel face. He's definitely not improved his behavior since being committed. Not that it was in any doubt. I see he's gone back to the making Chris Chan level noises when mad

 

[NattyDaddy]

Just talked to the man himself, He spit out the same shit verbatim for about 2 minutes. It's interesting to hear him live- he talks to people like he does when he is recording a video. My guy living in the Werner Show.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

Just talked to the man himself, He spit out the same shit verbatim for about 2 minutes. It's interesting to hear him live- he talks to people like he does when he is recording a video. My guy living in the Werner Show.

Did you at least wear a glove when you pozloaded my negholep?

 

[Wernology]

Just talked to the man himself, He spit out the same shit verbatim for about 2 minutes. It's interesting to hear him live- he talks to people like he does when he is recording a video. My guy living in the Werner Show.

Almost a shame that Washington is a two party state when it comes to recording phone conversations.

 

[wenttobermuda]

I have long commented on the fact that Lucas explicitly attributes his atheism to the failure of God, and to a lesser extent Christians, to satisfy his sexual desires. It delights me, especially considering how central atheism is to his identity, and how much time and injury he invested in angry, Facebook atheism in years past. I wish Goldie would've asked him how he can take him seriously as an atheist when his atheism is a by product of his lack of sexual success. But this is a small, cruel wish.

Lucas's latest video has taken this tendency to triumphantly declare he doesn't believe in God because his dick is dry to its logical, ridiculous conclusion. A transcript:

I want a girlfriend, Gen Z. I want to date you. (pause) Listen Christians! You’re the reason why I’m an atheist! It’s your two-time bullshit with these guys. Its like two girls friends to a guy out there! Man I see it all the time. It’s like you didn’t even read a bible, you hypocrites. Which is against Mark:23, against hypocrisy. Luke 12:15 says to be wary of GREED IN ALL FORMS. And you’re GREEDY. Uhhm. Uhh. John 13:34 says to love one another. Mathew 6:24 says don’t worship money. Alright Gen Z Christians? Then stop being the problem! And drop a chick! (roars pathetically)! See this is why people don’t believe in God! Religion is in our way! (furious retard roar).

Lucas thinks people are as invested in this as he is. He believes that he is personally injuring Christians everywhere when he declares his atheism. It calls to mind an adolescent thumbing his nose at his mother by proclaiming his lack of faith, which I’m sure is also something he’s done.

And, as always, when the subject of atheism and Lucas is raised, I remind myself that: a) Lucas has claimed that his knowledge of the Bible increases his chances of getting laid; 2) Lucas has stated that the Bible is an instructional booklet for controlling women who believe in all that nonsense; 3) Lucas admits that he is terrified of atheist women, and may feel more comfortable around Christian women, because they are less "assertive" and atheist men (like him) tend to be very shy.

Christianity, atheism, for Lucas its all the same and all about fucking and eating, or even better, being observed by jealous rival males as you fuck and eat.

 

[IceQueen]

I have long commented on the fact that Lucas explicitly attributes his atheism to the failure of God, and to a lesser extent Christians, to satisfy his sexual desires. It delights me, especially considering how central atheism is to his identity, and how much time and injury he invested in angry, Facebook atheism in years past. I wish Goldie would've asked him how he can take him seriously as an atheist when his atheism is a by product of his lack of sexual success. But this is a small, cruel wish.

Lucas's latest video has taken this tendency to triumphantly declare he doesn't believe in God because his dick is dry to its logical, ridiculous conclusion. A transcript:


Lucas thinks people are as invested in this as he is. He believes that he is personally injuring Christians everywhere when he declares his atheism. It calls to mind an adolescent thumbing his nose at his mother by proclaiming his lack of faith, which I’m sure is also something he’s done.

And, as always, when the subject of atheism and Lucas is raised, I remind myself that: a) Lucas has claimed that his knowledge of the Bible increases his chances of getting laid; 2) Lucas has stated that the Bible is an instructional booklet for controlling women who believe in all that nonsense; 3) Lucas admits that he is terrified of atheist women, and may feel more comfortable around Christian women, because they are less "assertive" and atheist men (like him) tend to be very shy.

Christianity, atheism, for Lucas its all the same and all about fucking and eating, or even better, being observed by jealous rival males as you fuck and eat.

Another thing that makes his atheism completely irrelevant is the fact that Lucas clearly isn’t an atheist. He either believes in a God or thinks a God MIGHT exist, and he is absolutely LIVID at that God. I always think it’s so dumb when atheists make atheism their whole personality, but then make it abundantly clear that it isn’t that they don’t believe in God, it’s that God isn’t giving them every single thing they want and they are mad about it. Yet another thing on the list of batshit ridiculous Wernisms.

 

[wenttobermuda]

Another thing that makes his atheism completely irrelevant is the fact that Lucas clearly isn’t an atheist. He either believes in a God or thinks a God MIGHT exist, and he is absolutely LIVID at that God. I always think it’s so dumb when atheists make atheism their whole personality, but then make it abundantly clear that it isn’t that they don’t believe in God, it’s that God isn’t giving them every single thing they want and they are mad about it. Yet another thing on the list of batshit ridiculous Wernisms.

I don't take Lucas's atheism seriously, or Lucas seriously for that matter, and like how you described it as "irrelevant." That's a great Lucas adjective. Irrelevant. A surplus person, needed nowhere, wanted by no one, good for nothing, with "convictions" based on desires that matter to no one. Who believes he had the world's attention. That he has mine is to my discredit.

You recall, what, 2007, 2010, when Hitchens and Dawkins stalked the earth, and snide, prosletyzing atheists had their moment on YouTube? Many lolcows came out of this scene. Lucas lurked on the periphery of this scene, and it's plainly marked him in ways that are increasingly dated and silly in this faggot current year.

In some sense, he is mimicking behavior that other, less crazy and helpless assholes had success with a decade or more ago. The world has moved on. Lucas hasn't.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Did Lucas just make his IG private?

 

[Wernology]

Another thing that makes his atheism completely irrelevant is the fact that Lucas clearly isn’t an atheist. He either believes in a God or thinks a God MIGHT exist, and he is absolutely LIVID at that God. I always think it’s so dumb when atheists make atheism their whole personality, but then make it abundantly clear that it isn’t that they don’t believe in God, it’s that God isn’t giving them every single thing they want and they are mad about it. Yet another thing on the list of batshit ridiculous Wernisms.

I'm not saying if I were some sort of deity that I would go about trying to prove my existence by making sure Lucas specifically never got laid again, but I'm also not saying I wouldn't do it either.

Honestly, I'd say it proves that there's some kind of driving cosmic forces at play that are keeping this genetic cul-du-sac from reproducing, like maybe he is being cockblocked by the universe and it's absolutely intentional on the universe's part.

"This one slipped past QA, boss, should we recall it?"
"Nah, it's fine; just don't let it reproduce."
"Strong desire to reproduce is an innate instinct in most of that model, though..."
"That's why it's funny."

Did Lucas just make his IG private?

Don't think so, I can still view it both logged out and from an account I don't follow him on (and vice versa).

 

[IceQueen]

I'm not saying if I were some sort of deity that I would go about trying to prove my existence by making sure Lucas specifically never got laid again, but I'm also not saying I wouldn't do it either.

Honestly, I'd say it proves that there's some kind of driving cosmic forces at play that are keeping this genetic cul-du-sac from reproducing, like maybe he is being cockblocked by the universe and it's absolutely intentional on the universe's part.

"This one slipped past QA, boss, should we recall it?"
"Nah, it's fine; just don't let it reproduce."
"Strong desire to reproduce is an innate instinct in most of that model, though..."
"That's why it's funny."



Don't think so, I can still view it both logged out and from an account I don't follow him on (and vice versa).

Not only is this hilarious, it is such an apt description. Lucas 100% is a faulty product for which recall was discussed but ultimately it was determined that he doesn’t have enough power to do anything bad enough to really warrant the recall.

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

Lucas clearly isn’t an atheist. He either believes in a God or thinks a God MIGHT exist,

Honestly, I'd say it proves that there's some kind of driving cosmic forces at play that are keeping this genetic cul-du-sac from reproducing, like maybe he is being cockblocked by the universe and it's absolutely intentional on the universe's part.

In hindsight I've never really paid attention to context clues closely enough to consider if Lucas is actually an atheist or an agnostic or if he even knows the difference between the two. Whatever your stance on religion or existence is, it seems insignificant to consider any divine intervention keeping Lucas from getting the things he wants. Nothing has to intervene, he's completely incapable by his own means.

 

[themotherflippin480]

Just talked to the man himself, He spit out the same shit verbatim for about 2 minutes. It's interesting to hear him live- he talks to people like he does when he is recording a video. My guy living in the Werner Show.

In hindsight I've never really paid attention to context clues closely enough to consider if Lucas is actually an atheist or an agnostic or if he even knows the difference between the two. Whatever your stance on religion or existenc

This would be his number (509) 715-5449...
Goldaor can confirm?

Wow, from spokane to airway heights, memory serves me right, thats a bit of an expensive trip for soneine with little money...

 

[Krathnami]

Wow, from spokane to airway heights, memory serves me right, thats a bit of an expensive trip for soneine with little money...

It’s over an hour on at least two different buses from Airway Heights to SCC. I don’t know how he thinks he’s going to do that every day.

 

[WonderWino]

It’s over an hour on at least two different buses from Airway Heights to SCC. I don’t know how he thinks he’s going to do that every day.

Best not to assume he actually thought that far ahead and considered that problem

That said, around here we call the creepy guys who sit around on busses like him gawking at young women 'bus buzzards' with bonus points if they offer said women questionable, half empty bottles of booze from a brown paper bag during the bus ride

I think that describes lucas rather well. I can totally see him spending hours on a bus every day offering blue colored MD 20/20 and shit quality weed to random teen girls sitting nearby when he thinks the driver isn't paying attention to him

 

[dirtydeanna96]

He either believes in a God or thinks a God MIGHT exist, and he is absolutely LIVID at that God

Yeah, Lucas is a classic misotheist.
He decides not to believe in God because he isn't showered with wealth and health

 

[Wernology]

My internet is trash tonight and uploading has failed twice; maybe third time's the charm. Anyway it's still uploading, it's 2am, and I'm going to bed. If it fails I'll try again in the morning with hopefully not Lucas level stability for internet service.

Edit: Ah good, still "processing" hours later.

Thanks youtube, for also being trash.

Uploading again.

 

[Goldaor]

He's roaming the streets at 11PM and it's 33 degree, I wonder what the hell he's doing. (Beside of course scream at his phone)

 

[boner_alert]

This is absolutely revolting. I know that effect is coming from the moisture from his breathing, which is making those areas of the mask see-through but it looks like he's spewing literal shit from his mouth. But it does warm my heart to see that it appears he has not been able to secure a place to sleep for the night, and it seems really cold

 

[WonderWino]

He's roaming the streets at 11PM and it's 33 degree, I wonder what the hell he's doing. (Beside of course scream at his phone)

Aside from freezing his ass off probably screeching internally at being stuck outside in freezing weather late at night and blaming it on the nurse or HOC for being bigots. Yet at the same time clearly not taking the time to consider that his situation could have easily been avoided by not going out of his way to do stupid things that put him there in the first place, not to mention failing to realize that he would have money for a warm place to stay and a hot meal if he had only taken the time to save a little money from his tardbux each month for exactly these kinds of situations. and since its only the 23rd and hes still banned from HOC for awhile yet its going to be a very rough few days waiting for his money to come in. and its only just starting to shift over to winter. He has months of such weather ahead of him

It really amazes me, even for lucas that he doesn't even have the common sense to have a pair of warm socks, some gloves and a blanket in his backpack for such situations, even if nothing else. Hell even for just being outside in the winter without having to worry about where hes sleeping and getting food from. For someone who has spent literally months wandering the streets in all weather for hours every day he really doesn't clue in enough to take even the most fundamental steps to stay alive. One would be hard pressed to find a person more of a walking stereotype of the kind of person for whom the old institutional system existed for. Its not hyperbolic to say that without the christian charities and government welfare he would literally be dead by now from his own inability to take care of even the most basic needs he has