Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Jeep1971]

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Sorry for the shitty screengrab.
Yes Lucas it is totally the left's fault you don't have a teen gf. It isn't due to you being a lazy fucker and having no drive to make your own money.

We need a laugh react.

 

[mothman96]

View attachment 3128054
Sorry for the shitty screengrab.
Yes Lucas it is totally the left's fault you don't have a teen gf. It isn't due to you being a lazy fucker and having no drive to make your own money.

A Gonzaga chick. Gonzaga is a private university associated with the Catholic Church. The Creep is probably thinking a girl graduating from a university would be in a better position to provide for him.

 

[Pink Freud]

He certainly knows a thing or #2 about pooping his pants. “Everyone does it! … Right, guys?”

 

[WonderWino]

He certainly knows a thing or #2 about pooping his pants. “Everyone does it! … Right, guys?”
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Facebook isn't a dating site, and trying to use it as one usually gets people thinking you're a creep. Not to mention if hes trying to use it as one he's going to end up getting permanently banned just like he has been from every other dating site

Whats that saying - when everyone else is the problem the problem is you

 

[mothman96]

Well, this I didn't know. Apparently there is separate part of FB for dating. Those interested in finding a date(s) create a dating profile. Lucas instead is using his own page to look for a date/wanting for someone to hook him up. Will the Creep be making a dating profile too.

ETA:
It looks like all the walking he says he is doing is to eyeball the young women in various places.
Oh and he is still sweeping under the rug that he ended up in Spokane because he was catfished.

ETA2:
Wonder, is he creeping outside Incrediburger or is he inside feeding his gluttony while he eyeballs the girls.

ETA3:
Yea, feeds his gluttony while eyeballing the girls.

 

[ShadowBorg]

Facebook isn't a dating site, and trying to use it as one usually gets people thinking you're a creep. Not to mention if hes trying to use it as one he's going to end up getting permanently banned just like he has been from every other dating site

Whats that saying - when everyone else is the problem the problem is you

 

[Cow-Lovin' Fool]

And he did yoga with an 18 yr old in a mental hospital and almost kissed her

but then she broke out a can of pepper spray

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

but then she broke out a can of pepper spray....which he grabbed and sprayed on his burger, topping it off with cottage cheese and Sriracha Mayo. Lucas replaced the top bun, patting it down an uncomfortable amount of times with his black-nailed goblin hand, muttering "...muthafukkas...make fun of MY pics of food..." while simultaneously using portrait orientation to film a short video of himself smekking and belching as he wolfed down the capsaicin-soaked burger, only remembering to take a photo when halfway done with his 1/2 lb. "snack", dripping sauce and spicy tears from his wattle all the while, a flushed euphoria giving his egg-shaped head the appearance of a spicy canned ham.

Ah, yes. Success was imminent. Baby Z would soon be his. He farted painfully, grimacing with the effort of raising one massive asscheek off the bench, a strangled oboe whine filling the booth with the noxious bouquet of undigested dairy and grease. He giggled with a strange sense of pride at the toxic effluvium of his flatulence. Dude, when that cute waitress walked back here to bring him his sixth refill of milk, she's not gonna know what hit her! Bitch's hair would positively CURL! He was momentarily distracted by a ineffectual spasm in the front of his jeans, the idea of a blonde, curly-haired teenager bringing back a rush of memories of his gorgeous niece. The front of his jeans strained briefly, then collapsed as yet another thunderous, rubbery fart ripped out of his girlish butt. He grinned his unhinged grin, looking for all the world like an obese Jack Torrance from The Shining with down syndrome. He was going to rattle the windows of Mallon Place tonight! That morning, one of the orderlies had complained about the "disgusting mess" Lucas had left in his sheets. Well, he wasn't there to take their orders. They were gonna push darkness on him, he'd GIVE them something to clean up!

 

[WonderWino]

but then she broke out a can of pepper spray....which he grabbed and sprayed on his burger, topping it off with cottage cheese and Sriracha Mayo. Lucas replaced the top bun, patting it down an uncomfortable amount of times with his black-nailed goblin hand, muttering "...muthafukkas...make fun of MY pics of food..." while simultaneously using portrait orientation to film a short video of himself smekking and belching as he wolfed down the capsaicin-soaked burger, only remembering to take a photo when halfway done with his 1/2 lb. "snack", dripping sauce and spicy tears from his wattle all the while, a flushed euphoria giving his egg-shaped head the appearance of a spicy canned ham.

The simpsons really does have a clip for literally everything it seems

. He grinned his unhinged grin, looking for all the world like an obese Jack Torrance from The Shining with down syndrome. He was going to rattle the windows of Mallon Place tonight! That morning, one of the orderlies had complained about the "disgusting mess" Lucas had left in his sheets. Well, he wasn't there to take their orders. They were gonna push darkness on him, he'd GIVE them something to clean up!

Fits that image perfectly

 

[Visibly Disgusted]

He's really been hyper fixated back on the getting a girlfriend grind lately. Sounds like he's out in public stalking young women again. Cue the regular flatbill rants as he sees a zoomer girl somewhere in the proximity of any guy that isn't him. Sounds like it's about time for him to start getting banned from more places.

 

[Jeep1971]

JFC, you've got a Pulitzer in you in the future if you write. That was fan fiction perfection.

Now that warm weather is approaching, I think we will see Lucas starting to unravel. More women out and about on nice days,in warm weather clothing. It will send him into a fuck-frenzy. Then you'll see police contacts, public mooings,etc.

 

[ManfromtheMoon]

'I don't want to watch sweaty half naked men play sports! I want to watch sweaty half naked troons play sports instead' - lucas werner

He didn't think that one through

lets be honest, one big reason why lucas wants to diddle kids is that he can overpower them

 

[mothman96]

Yea, he sees fathers with their daughters. His scrambled egg rutting animal brain makes them out to be a "couple". Like when he was at the restaurant with Suzanne and blew a fuse when he saw a man with a young girl(s). Girls he wanted for himself. He did finally come out and say they could have been a father with his daughter(s).

ETA:
Well let us see, what can Lucas use to bring in the hot baes. Suggestions?

ETA2:
Right, any of those suggestions will work for the nursing home POS.

 

[Pink Freud]

That’s a lot of caffeine for someone who threw a glass at a wall when he had a couple of soda pops.

 

[WhiskerBiscuit]

That’s a lot of caffeine for someone who threw a glass at a wall when he had a couple of soda pops.View attachment 3129500

Oh good. Eating deodorant again.

 

[Niggasaurus Rex]

He's so damn socially awkward it's just painful to witness. I like how he just casually drops "I used to eat my cousin's chapstick" in there. Why your cousin's tho?...using her chapstick is the closest his lips ever got to a girl's as an adolescent and it was his fucking cousin, and ofcourse he ate it too because it's Lucas we're talking about here. What an unbelievable sped. He was definitely that kid who always got in trouble for eating glue in the classroom.

 

[Trainwreck]

Oh for fuck's sake, the last thing that fat faggot needs is two cans of Bang, and we know he will drink them both in one sitting. That's 600mgs of caffeine.

 

[Da Dude123]

That’s a lot of caffeine for someone who threw a glass at a wall when he had a couple of soda pops.View attachment 3129500

Where did he get this stuff? Did he get his gubmint check this week? Or did some ween doordash him that stuff from 7/11?

I had thought he was basically stuck in the nursing home, but it is sort of sounding like he is out and about. He hasn't posted any photos or videos that show him outside the nursing home.

To him, eating chapstick is a normal thing. And I wish someone would comment on the caffeine content and how it supposedly makes him violent. He would moooo and chimpout and delet that comment! What a cow!

 

[mothman96]

Where did he get this stuff? Did he get his gubmint check this week? Or did some ween doordash him that stuff from 7/11?

I had thought he was basically stuck in the nursing home, but it is sort of sounding like he is out and about. He hasn't posted any photos or videos that show him outside the nursing home.

To him, eating chapstick is a normal thing. And I wish someone would comment on the caffeine content and how it supposedly makes him violent. He would moooo and chimpout and delet that comment! What a cow!

His SSI comes in on the 1st of every mo. It'll be tomorrow and he'll be getting his $70 Personal Needs Allowance. Looks to me he may not be without money as he claims to be.
I'd say since he deleted his youtube channels he is holding back from making/posting videos when he is out creeping.

 

[Trainwreck]

I bet he's walking to Bong's Grocery and Deli rather than 7-11. It's only 3.5 blocks from the nursing home.