Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

Oh he’s got to be mooing with rage. I’m against the neghole pozzing, but this one warms my heart.
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I like how he was so upbeat earlier calling people "friend" and "Have a day as pleasant as the sunshine" and all that fake shit then this happened and he's seething toward everyone now "fuck you, fuck this, fuck that." As Q-Bert recently pointed out with that story of the girl he (allegedly) talked to in the park becoming literal vermin in his eyes when he realized she wouldn't date him, you're only deserving of the charade of basic human decency when he can potentially benefit from you
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Isn't Mallon Place supposed to be monitoring his diet? If they are, how is he getting to eat all of this?

If a loved one of mine was in this place, and supposedly having their diet monitored, and I found out they were getting outside food brought in, I would have some severe words for the staff.
 
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Pink Freud said:
Oh he’s got to be mooing with rage. I’m against the neghole pozzing, but this one warms my heart.
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So.... it sounds like whoever was doing that was buttering him up just to cancel an order and tell him to convert to islam. I'm sure it pissed lucas off but he still got to gorge himself out of it

Bobby Worst said:
I like how he was so upbeat earlier calling people "friend" and "Have a day as pleasant as the sunshine" and all that fake shit then this happened and he's seething toward everyone now "fuck you, fuck this, fuck that." As Q-Bert recently pointed out with that story of the girl he (allegedly) talked to in the park becoming literal vermin in his eyes when he realized she wouldn't date him, you're only deserving of the charade of basic human decency when he can potentially benefit from you
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As with everything lucas does when he interacts with people, its all about him trying to manipulate others into doing what he wants and for his gain. He puts on whatever act he thinks will benefit him. Makes me wonder how he behaves when talking to doctors in the psych ward. You'd think they would have more than enough experience with lucas's type to recognize him for what he is

Cheesegirl78 said:
Isn't Mallon Place supposed to be monitoring his diet? If they are, how is he getting to eat all of this?

If a loved one of mine was in this place, and supposedly having their diet monitored, and I found out they were getting outside food brought in, I would have some severe words for the staff.
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Nursing homes are by law supposed to have an approved diet for the general population and for specific conditions like kidney issues and diabetes and they're supposed to ensure residents keep to those diets. They can get in serious trouble with the state licensing board for failing to do so and have liability if anything happens to the person as a result. As has been stated several times before, mallon place is a shit tier facility and has gotten into trouble in the past for not doing what they're supposed to. If lucas loses his feet over it he could go after them for it. Not that he will because he's incompetent and too stupid to know how but they're still liable. That said, as you said if I found out something like that was going on with a family member and they weren't doing their job it wouldn't be me having words with the staff it would be a lawyer. Not that I give a shit about what happens to lucas, but if they're not ensuring he's eating the way he's supposed to be it stands to reason that they're not taking proper care of the other residents either, and thats a perception they don't seem to care about as much as they should. a complaint against them for their odd handling of lucas's diet could easily open a can of worms in terms of other things they're fucking up on, so you'd think they'd be more concerned, if only out of fear of liability and getting fired

mothman96 said:
The fatso says "not bad" but I'm sure he really enjoyed the macaroni lunch.
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Yet again, he has three drinks with his meal. and what happened to lucas avoiding coffee in favor of hot chocolate like he always drank during the starbucks incident era. He used to claim the caffeine didn't agree with him. and why do I get the feeling he put that salad dressing on the pasta

and gee, I wonder why he is so thirsty as he pointed out in the comments. Must be the beetus acting up after pigging out for the last few days. and yet here he is oinking for more

Stinkyboy said:
His “one meal” is like when alcoholics say “one drink”, but that drink is a 2L bottle
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When I read that it reminded me of lucas trying to do something like this, but with his beetus glucose meter instead
 
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Cheesegirl78 said:
Does he have two cups of coffee?
He does know caffeine is a diuretic and will make him even more thirsty, right?

Shit, it's Lucas, of course he doesn't know. Or care...
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WonderWino said:
Yet again, he has three drinks with his meal. and what happened to lucas avoiding coffee in favor of hot chocolate like he always drank during the starbucks incident era. He used to claim the caffeine didn't agree with him. and why do I get the feeling he put that salad dressing on the pasta
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The coffee served at Mallon is decaf.
 
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Cheesegirl78 said:
Does he have two cups of coffee?
He does know caffeine is a diuretic and will make him even more thirsty, right?

Shit, it's Lucas, of course he doesn't know. Or care...
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You know what? The liquid in those two cups doesn't look like coffee, even coffee with milk. It may just be the color of the photo, but it looks like hot chocolate. And we know Lucas always used to get "cocoa" as he put it at starbucks, we all thought it was little strange that all of a sudden he was drinking so much coffee. Could he be drinking hot chocolate? With his dairy fixation that would make a lot more sense...
 
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GleamingTheQ-Bert said:
You know what? The liquid in those two cups doesn't look like coffee, even coffee with milk. It may just be the color of the photo, but it looks like hot chocolate. And we know Lucas always used to get "cocoa" as he put it at starbucks, we all thought it was little strange that all of a sudden he was drinking so much coffee. Could he be drinking hot chocolate? With his dairy fixation that would make a lot more sense...
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I thought it was just weak coffee.
 
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mothman96 said:
I thought it was just weak coffee.
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Im not sure. You must admit, two cups of hot cocoa would definitely be within the realm of possibility for Lucas. Also, I was looking at the amenities that Mallon place offers, apparently they have a free beauty salon, that means Lucas could get a haircut and a shave for free.
 
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i mean, he's been known to double fist milk before. he probably smells a bit curdled and sour if he's sweating without regular bathing or doing something to balance out the dairy, not to mention any GI issues he has with lactase and flatulence.

having meals at his nursing home on the taxpayer's dime while simultaneously begging for excessive food from the general public is disgusting behavior and absolute greed and gluttony. it's greedy to take from the public twice and contribute nothing (no work, no taxes or tithes, not even any creative or intellectual pursuits). it's gluttonous to make the fruits of that greed be food used to get so fat he's getting fat-man diseases like diabetes.

if he had money he would be equally as useless and crazy but also have gout.
 
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GleamingTheQ-Bert said:
Im not sure. You must admit, two cups of hot cocoa would definitely be within the realm of possibility for Lucas. Also, I was looking at the amenities that Mallon place offers, apparently they have a free beauty salon, that means Lucas could get a haircut and a shave for free.
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To be fair with what little hair lucas has left there isn't much they could do with it other than shave it. If he isn't willing to just shave it off he should just go full medieval tonsure instead in true catholic church fashion


It fits with his hairline and since he's pretty much cloistered and has defacto vows of poverty and chastity anyway, and peaches his pseudo science to the masses as his only 'job' he certainly has enough in common with a medieval monk to suit such a hairstyle perfectly. He could be the monk of mallon place
 
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The outcast owls are faggots nuff said.

I had a long catching up to do and planned on one of my (in)famous long posts but I saw these guys and just want to throw them all into a wood chipper. Lucas is too FAT to fit in one, but don't worry his feet will be lost one way or another ;)
 
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