- Joined
- Jul 21, 2015
Agreed.
One notable thing from this essay of Lucas's that we've all pored over, is that Lucas was certainly more Lucid, more honest with himself, and more able to admit his own faults back when he wrote this.
Time, stress, isolation, and mania has filed his self defense mechanism to a razor sharp point that would cut any criticisms that came near him into ribbons.
Nowadays I have no doubt that if you told Lucas the very same things that he had admitted about himself when he wrote this, he would deny them and call you a troll.
But that's the sort of fluidity that his mental disorder creates within his brain: Lucas loves to say something that he pulled straight out of his ass, and repeat it until it becomes a fact.
For example in his most recent video, he's decided that the superior DNA that old men give to their children when they reproduce with girls ages 18 to 24, (yes we've heard it all before), but the new edition is that the children of this Union are six times healthier! 6 times!
Now of course Lucas doesn't say how he quantifies six times healthier; did someone live to be 420 years old? No? Can their blood be distilled to cure cancer in other people?
But again similar to how Lucas had earlier said that people with covid-19 die 40% faster than people with AIDS, or some such nonsense, it's obviously a complete fabrication.
It's important to remember that Luke is all alone by himself for the vast majority of the day. He doesn't seem to have any interest in using the Nintendo DS that Goldaor gave him, he never talks about it, he never mentions any progress he's making in the games.
But he will trickle out, every few hours,a new short vid where he repeats his talking points dujour and the ideas that get fomented with this repetition eventually become part of his internal monologue, they become part of his reality.
This is how Lucas is so facile and fluid with these complete Fabrications that he repeats over and over again, like this idea that the estrogen in women can somehow pass, osmosis-defying, through the air and affect the testosterone in men.
He Keeps repeating these things so much that to him, they're old hat. They're facts!
And he gets quite irritated when other people ask for proof and evidence of these self-created facts.
It's one of the reasons why I think therapy would Lucas would be so difficult. He has such an advanced, deeply ingrained denial and self-Comfort reflex inside of him.
It would be an enormous hurdle to get Lucas to admit that this reality he's created for himself it's simply a comfortable lie, so that he avoids having to face up to responsibility for the life he has.
But getting him to face this would be crucial for any therapy that went beyond simply drugging him into a stupor.
And I think the inability to successfully enact this sort of Revelatory therapy is one of the reasons why it seems that every treatment Lucas has received (that we've been witness to) Simply amounts to filling him with benzodiazepines until he becomes a fat inert slug.
Someone obviously made a calculation that "fat inert slug Lucas" dying of diabetes was preferable to sober semi-functional Lucas being a threat to the world.
And you know what? I have to say I agree.
He still has all those horrible thoughts in his head, like when he came out of the nuthouse last time and he was a big soft-spoken ball of blubber talking about his five watches and all his board games, and for a little while I thought, "wow, Lucas has made some real progress! He's not talking about little girls anymore!"
But then bit by bit it started to creep out.
He stopped taking his medication and I realized that those thoughts never went away, they were simply tamped down by huge amounts of sedatives.
For Lucas, that's the best-case scenario.
That or jail.
