Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

It's not even light out and he's hitting the pipe and he's tired of the world cucking him.

View attachment 1691758
So HoC gave him an ultimatum if he wants to stay there. He interprets it as “cockblocking” because he’s Lucas.

His ability to fuck up every somewhat stable situation he has for his pursuit of a zoomer bae is astonishing. It’s the reason he got evicted from his fartbox. And now it will be the reason he ends up on the streets in a freezing Washington winter.

How does he not possesses even the most base instinctual level of self preservation? HoC is his last refuge against literally sleeping outside in the freezing cold and he is doing everything possible to sabotage it.
 
It's not even light out and he's hitting the pipe and he's tired of the world cucking him.

View attachment 1691758
How 'ppropriate:

Uh!
I can't help my feelings
I'll go out of my mind
These players out to get me
'Cause they like my behind
I can't love my business
If I can't get a trick
Down on Santa Monica where tricks aren't for kids
Whoa
Come on and kick me
Whoa
Come on and kick me
(Whoa-oh-oh)
Come on and kick me
(Whoa-oh-oh)
You've got your problems
(Whoa-oh-oh)
I got my eyes wide
(Whoa-oh-oh)
You got your big G's
I got my hash pipe
Uh!
I can't help my bookies
They get out of control
I know that you don't care
But I want you to know
The least likely flavor is the favorite treat
Of men that don't bother with the taste of a teat
Whoa
Come on and kick me
Whoa
Come on and kick me
(Whoa-oh-oh)
Come on and kick me
(Whoa-oh-oh)
You got your problems
(Whoa-oh-oh)
I got my…
 
Gotta also love how our boy is all about MAKING a baby, but not necessarily raising one. It ultimately just shows how his primary goal is to fuck a zoomer bae, not make a baby...or have a family. He wants to fuck, like the disgusting rutting animal he is.
 
Last edited:
Come on Gen Z ladies. Which one of you is going to volunteer to throw your life away/be abused/live in misery for a lobster meal.

1603906258629.png
 
Gotta also love how our boy is all about MAKING a baby, but not necessarily raising one. It ultimately just shows how his primary goal is to fuck a zoomer bae, not make a baby...or have a family. He wants to fuck, like the disgusting rutting animal he is.
Ironically, he'd probably have a better success rate (or even a single success) if he was upfront about just wanting to bang young chicks. I don't know Spokane from a hole in the ground but I'm willing to bet that its population of zoomer baes are not all constantly thinking about having babies and where they're gonna find their baby-daddy.
There's lots of sleazy dudes his age out there who are getting plenty of action with younger women without resorting to quasi-scientific propaganda. If he could keep his repugnant personality at bay for the length of an evening and just, you know, talk to women like a normal human, he might actually get to bag a bae. He can't/won't, though, obviously, so he'll remain unfuckable for the rest of his miserable existence.
 
So he's sheltered up in the lobby of the community college no doubt reeking of weed on top of his probably already offensive smell and filming periodic rants that showcase his mental illnesses and innate danger to young women. I can't believe he hasn't been told to move on already but this can only go on for so long.

More on that complete lack of self preservation thing, it's interesting how little he seems to be motivated to find actual residency with extreme temperatures not far away. Instead of that panic to buckle down and get your shit together impulse people would have in his position, he's still too busy mooing about "christian sluts" and getting too high to form a coherent sentence. You know that old saying when you hit rock bottom the only way to go is up, Lucas did that, got himself a pickaxe and is hell bent to keep digging until he reaches the other side of the planet. I don't think he even really cares anymore but he will when it's in the negatives and there's not enough room at the shelters and he finds himself sleeping on the sidewalk. Context clues make me think he's gonna try to get old King Roy to let him stay around his place for a while. I don't see that happening. This winter we might get to see Lucas at the actual lowest point he can possibly get.
 
More on that complete lack of self preservation thing, it's interesting how little he seems to be motivated to find actual residency with extreme temperatures not far away. Instead of that panic to buckle down and get your shit together impulse people would have in his position, he's still too busy mooing about "christian sluts" and getting too high to form a coherent sentence. You know that old saying when you hit rock bottom the only way to go is up, Lucas did that, got himself a pickaxe and is hell bent to keep digging until he reaches the other side of the planet. I don't think he even really cares anymore but he will when it's in the negatives and there's not enough room at the shelters and he finds himself sleeping on the sidewalk. Context clues make me think he's gonna try to get old King Roy to let him stay around his place for a while. I don't see that happening. This winter we might get to see Lucas at the actual lowest point he can possibly get.
That is one of the reasons he's desperate for a wife. The Freak thinks if he gets himself a wife, King Roy will let him move back in. Once entrenched in King Roy's house it's a matter of waiting till the King kicks the bucket (the sooner the better). He thinks because he's got a wife and child (children) the King will leave everything to him.
 
View attachment 1691959
His current voice mail message.
You. Cannot. Make. This. Shit. Up.
Pahahaha imagine he actually manages to get a call back for a job he's applied for and his potential employer hears that mad spiel. The only thing this buffoon is good at is self sabotage on every front. He single handedly ensures he will never find gainful employment, shelter, or love in this lifetime. It's not the greybeards, the agephobes, the flatbills or the Covid sluts, Lucas. It's you.
 
Come on Gen Z ladies. Which one of you is going to volunteer to throw your life away/be abused/live in misery for a lobster meal.

View attachment 1692044


Thats a $150 meal? Jesus christ what a ripoff. Around here you can get a whole lobster for $10 - $15 and you could make that meal for $40 or less. I know restaurants have to make a profit but thats just absurd. Seeing stupid things like that just reminds me why I cook my own food and rarely bother with those sorts of restaurants

and just to prove he's an idiot even the keg, which has far better steak and lobster meals would be a hell of alot cheaper than that $150 for 2 people

Telomoron said:
So he's sheltered up in the lobby of the community college no doubt reeking of weed on top of his probably already offensive smell and filming periodic rants that showcase his mental illnesses and innate danger to young women. I can't believe he hasn't been told to move on already but this can only go on for so long.

More on that complete lack of self preservation thing, it's interesting how little he seems to be motivated to find actual residency with extreme temperatures not far away. Instead of that panic to buckle down and get your shit together impulse people would have in his position, he's still too busy mooing about "christian sluts" and getting too high to form a coherent sentence. You know that old saying when you hit rock bottom the only way to go is up, Lucas did that, got himself a pickaxe and is hell bent to keep digging until he reaches the other side of the planet. I don't think he even really cares anymore but he will when it's in the negatives and there's not enough room at the shelters and he finds himself sleeping on the sidewalk. Context clues make me think he's gonna try to get old King Roy to let him stay around his place for a while. I don't see that happening. This winter we might get to see Lucas at the actual lowest point he can possibly get.

When I read that I couldn't help but imagine lucas frozen to death on a street corner with a pipe in his hand and looking like he's frozen in mid rant, like he is one of those petrified scorched in fallout 76 that crumbles and goes radioactive if you touch it....except in his case he would just release an overpowering BO and weed odor when he shatters

But yeah, if he doesn't smarten up real quick winter could be really bad for him, and its already starting to cool down considerably. Other hobos prepare themselves for having to spend time outside in the winter, lucas doesn't have so much as a pair of gloves or a warm sweater, let alone warm footwear, those shitty sneakers he has won't do him much good in the winter if he is spending hours outside, especially if they get wet. As stupid as it may sound, many hobos who couldn't get anything else in vancouver used to hit up the second hand stores and buy a pair of ski boots for a few dollars and wear them around during the winter. Not the most pleasant things to walk around in but they're warm and insulated and will definitely keep you from getting frostbite if you have no other proper footwear. Lucas would be smart to see if he could find a cheap pair, especially with his diabetes. It may make him look even stupider than usual - trying to wonder scc and the streets with ski boots on ranting about sperm but if its a bad winter they could save him a trip to the hospital

Rogowski said:
He’s reached the Chris Chan level of desperation by posting his own phone number online.

Not to mention hes offering lamb ribs. I'm shocked they even sell that there. Lamb legs, roasts and racks are good but i've never seen anybody, restaurant or otherwise manage to make lamb ribs that weren't awful. Either way too dry or way too fatty, and there is rarely much meat on them in the first place. Not to mention any bbq put on them just ruins it. bbq sauce doesn't go well with lamb at all

But of course this is lucas, the guy who puts pepper on questionably safe to eat caviar and thinks its a good thing. It shouldn't surprise me he offers something that shitty. That said, most younger people don't even really like lamb that much in my experience. Unless they're from europe or the middle east. Its not really an american thing these days. Its also usually very fatty, which the zoomer baes he wants probably would avoid anyway to stay in shape

Krathnami said:
I put the phone number into Google and brought up no businesses. Is Lucas so desperate that he’s doxxing himself?

'the fineness of delicious things'

ffs that is the sloppiest put together sushi i've ever seen. Look at how the seaweed has a bit piece just hanging off the salmon roe pieces. Thats a big no no presentation wise and is very easy to fix with a tab of rice wine vinegar to get it to stick down. The amount of eggs is very inconsistent from piece to piece and the quality of the rest of it is just weird. The rest of the fish is cut weirdly and badly placed on the rice. Is some mexican with no experience responsible for making that plate or something? Thats an embarrassing presentation that would make a japanese sushi chef cringe and be ashamed that it was seen in his restaurant

and this is 'quality' and 'fineness' to lucas. I've seen better sushi out of gas stations and supermarkets

Stilgar of Troon said:
He put his phone number out there? Oh, I am sure that'll end well...

Just wait until someone gets a $30 burner phone, registers it under the name of lucas's mother so thats what comes up on call display and when he answers tells him its not in the cards. Even better if its goldy's gf that does it
 
Back