Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Bassomatic]

I have my doubts skeletor didn't pay for lunch honestly. I mean we can't prove it but, as a long time Wern watcher and lolcow fan anyone who touches poop tends to grab a turd by the handful. Literally yanking a shit log outta the unflushed toilet that is the net.

Even those who smartly use a stick to poke the stool, often jump into the pile like they are trying to cover a grenade going off. It's quite common weens etc are just as fucked up and or go nutty staring into lol cow void.

In Re to doctor nigga Luke, he's scientifically wrong and if you enjoy spicy food you also know a few tricks to prevent spicy butt. One of them is hydrate! Basic bitch once that burn is gone and before you eat it, have water. Keeps the o ring in anal mucus (lol phone tried turning it into Lucas) vs turd of fire.

Now when you're doing hot for challenge etc it can't save you really. But as always ready to be a father posting about his shits on YT is wrong again with science he claims to be a fan/expert/worshipper of.

His rant on why that marketed for teens in all but name booze was nonsense. He just liked it because it was there kids love that shit and he has no pallete.

 

[Fatal Walter]

I love when Lucas gets posted to reddit. He's surprisingly notorious for how few people have talked about him.

 

[Amewsed]

He doesn't.

It just another excuse as to why he doesn't have a girlfriend that lets him avoid looking at the real reason: He's just gross, controlling, abusive, uninteresting, and overall off-putting and unpleasant.

Stings less to say, "Oh if I wore a BASEBALL CAP" (never mind that he did that for awhile last year and it didn't work, shocker) or "Wow, maybe the problem is me, I should really take a good look at myself and get into some therapy." and puts all the blame on literally everyone else.

Same reason it's someone else's fault his tubby ass can't walk up to a woman and say, "Hi, I'm Lucas", no no noooo, some zoomer guy H A S to introduce him.

Anyway, when youtube is done chewing on it here's his evening meltdowns all put together.

1930's/40's fascism = Aryan "purity", anti-semites, swastika, mass genocide, etc.

2020's fascism = wearing baseball caps, not being a complete and utter failure at all things in life, not dating a greasy, mrsa infected bumcel; at least according to Garbage pail Lucas.

 

[Maxxicus Callahan]

Women love seeing people barf at eating competitions. How would anyone conduct a poll for this information?

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Women love seeing people barf at eating competitions. How would anyone conduct a poll for this information?

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It's almost like people tell him obvious bullshit because he's so gullible he'll believe anything.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

Why don't the Gen Z baes want to date Lucas? It's obviously because of Daddy issues and not because Lucas is unattractive, and offers nothing of value for a woman:

Original:

Archive (1080p):
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He's starting to look more like a "granddad" than a "daddy"

 

[Jeremiah the Bullfrog]

It's almost like people tell him obvious bullshit because he's so gullible he'll believe anything.

Give him a minute and his new plan for picking up women will be to walk up to them, say "Hi, my name is Lucas" and promptly vomit on their shoes.

Women love seeing people barf at eating competitions. How would anyone conduct a poll for this information?

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Lucas has been really proud of his 2.5k subscribers lately. I'm not particularly active on youtube, but I don't get the impression that 2500 is a particularly high subscriber count, nor do I believe that screaming the N-word into a cellphone camera and ranting about how teenage girls won't fuck you requires a lot of talent, but what do I know?

I guess when you've been shunned by your family, your former friends and every eligible woman in an entire generation; you've gotta take the wins where you can get them. On some level, he has to know that he has nothing to offer and that his situation isn't going to improve. Living in a halfway house is as good as it will ever get for him again. It's this, living under a bridge or the funny farm (and when he loses this, there isn't anything else coming after it). He occasionally mentions that he's going to find a job, but you, I and most importantly he, know that's all bullshit.

This is it. This is the rest of his life and it looks pretty bleak.... but he does have 2500 people who follow his insane ramblings on the internet, so at least there's that.

 

[WonderWino]

He has reached the point of non ironically being on the wrong end of 'they're not laughing with you they're laughing at you'

He's also clearly got it in his head that he is somehow 'popular' because he got a few thousand people seeing what he is really like from the reddit cringe page, as if thats a good thing. You can practically hear him salivating over the crackpot belief that this will translate into people paying him to do videos. He really is stupider than a bag of rocks

 

[INeedUhChickUnder26]

Give him a minute and his new plan for picking up women will be to walk up to them, say "Hi, my name is Lucas" and promptly vomit on their shoes.




Lucas has been really proud of his 2.5k subscribers lately. I'm not particularly active on youtube, but I don't get the impression that 2500 is a particularly high subscriber count, nor do I believe that screaming the N-word into a cellphone camera and ranting about how teenage girls won't fuck you requires a lot of talent, but what do I know?

I guess when you've been shunned by your family, your former friends and every eligible woman in an entire generation; you've gotta take the wins where you can get them. On some level, he has to know that he has nothing to offer and that his situation isn't going to improve. Living in a halfway house is as good as it will ever get for him again. It's this, living under a bridge or the funny farm (and when he loses this, there isn't anything else coming after it). He occasionally mentions that he's going to find a job, but you, I and most importantly he, know that's all bullshit.

This is it. This is the rest of his life and it looks pretty bleak.... but he does have 2500 people who follow his insane ramblings on the internet, so at least there's that.

Yeah. He says he's gained 500 followers. He's gained 50-60 actually. He went from 2.51k followers to 2.57k.

Breaking news...Lucas is an absolute retarded sperg.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Yeah. He says he's gained 500 followers. He's gained 50-60 actually. He went from 2.51k followers to 2.57k.

Breaking news...Lucas is an absolute retarded sperg.

He says he won't take any money to do anything racist. Yeah, because he does the racist videos for free, right?

 

[Twrx]

All he fucking does is lie, and spout off rascit and homophobic shit. I honestly believe he has never told the truth once in the near 50 years he's been alive.

 

[Wernology]

It's almost like people tell him obvious bullshit because he's so gullible he'll believe anything.

That's honestly one of the most entertaining things about him.

All you have to do is put an idea you know he'll find 'intelligent' or 'deep' into his swiss cheese brain, make it sound plausible enough, and he'll just fall for it no questions asked.

 

[Mister Uno]

Women love seeing people barf at eating competitions. How would anyone conduct a poll for this information?

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>sperm is ripest at age 45
I am 99% sure that is completley false. Correct me if wrong, but doesn't the chances of autism or some other mental problems increase for the baby if the Dad is around that age during conception?

 

[INeedUhChickUnder26]

>sperm is ripest at age 45
I am 99% sure that is completley false. Correct me if wrong, but doesn't the chances of autism or some other mental problems increase for the baby if the Dad is around that age during conception?

You can bump that up to 100%. And that's for supposed non-retarded fathers. Luke is both extremely retarded and extremely mentally ill.

 

[mothman96]

The Freak is so proud of the views he's advertising himself on @klickitat terrible memes video.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

Give him a minute and his new plan for picking up women will be to walk up to them, say "Hi, my name is Lucas" and promptly vomit on their shoes.




Lucas has been really proud of his 2.5k subscribers lately. I'm not particularly active on youtube, but I don't get the impression that 2500 is a particularly high subscriber count, nor do I believe that screaming the N-word into a cellphone camera and ranting about how teenage girls won't fuck you requires a lot of talent, but what do I know?

I guess when you've been shunned by your family, your former friends and every eligible woman in an entire generation; you've gotta take the wins where you can get them. On some level, he has to know that he has nothing to offer and that his situation isn't going to improve. Living in a halfway house is as good as it will ever get for him again. It's this, living under a bridge or the funny farm (and when he loses this, there isn't anything else coming after it). He occasionally mentions that he's going to find a job, but you, I and most importantly he, know that's all bullshit.

This is it. This is the rest of his life and it looks pretty bleak.... but he does have 2500 people who follow his insane ramblings on the internet, so at least there's that.

If Lucas's hasn't changed by 41, he's likely not going to change.

I think who people are is pretty set in stone by the time you reach your 40's.

 

[Maxxicus Callahan]

 

[Club Sandwich]

pic: citric acid dumbassery

citric acid binds to the same receptors for pain and heat on the tongue as capsaicin does. it doesn't neutralize anything because capsaicin isn't especially acidic or basic - it's purely an ion-channel receptor thing similar to vanilla extract. it's also why very large molecules, especially ones that have a relatively weak cell membrane like lipids (milk fat for example but also juicy hambugers or high fat cheeses or nuts) or anything that can act as a flushing agent (water, juice, literally anything that can flush away capsaicin-bearing oils or flakes) can alleviate the spicy taste.

it's almost like he's never passed high school biochem, and is a total spice wuss that probably can't handle anything "hotter" than a bell pepper.

 

[Wernology]

The Freak is so proud of the views he's advertising himself on @klickitat terrible memes video.

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Have a few more. He's in that same 'head swelled' phase he was after the LA Catfish Saga, which is funny because this time Reddit is involved.

Edit: I'm gonna use Lucas Style counting for this one:

1. How do you typo 40 as 500?
B. Clearly he keeps up to date on this thread because someone here called out the "500 new followers" thing.
C. When you start with 1, Lucas, the next number is 2. Not B.

 

[INeedUhChickUnder26]

Have a few more. He's in that same 'head swelled' phase he was after the LA Catfish Saga, which is funny because this time Reddit is involved.

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Edit: I'm gonna use Lucas Style counting for this one:

1. How do you typo 40 as 500?
B. Clearly he keeps up to date on this thread because someone here called out the "500 new followers" thing.
C. When you start with 1, Lucas, the next number is 2. Not B.

INeedUhChickUnder26 said:
Yeah. He says he's gained 500 followers. He's gained 50-60 actually. He went from 2.51k followers to 2.57k.

Breaking news...Lucas is an absolute retarded sperg.

Lucas references the 500 followers AND uses the word sperg, which was also in the post. He doesn't use that term often if at all. He's clearly reading the thread. LOL fuck off Lucas.

Also, a typo? It was a verbal statement...