Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

Fanatical Pragmatist said:
It doesn't matter that his dick isn't plenty good, because he is willing to fist any prospective lady!


Popcorn Santa Wern was a short-lived but hilarious version of Wern.
Just imaging the fat pedofreak walking the streets and under-bridges of Spokane with a 9lb sack of stale popcorn made me chuckle hard and long.
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No joke, this post had me laughing all the way down the street.
 
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Maxxicus Callahan said:
Pennyweight sounds like a term from the turn of the century.
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it is. it was used to measure precious metals as a smaller division of the troy ounce. i have an old scale that measures gold foil and one of the measures on it is in "dwt" which is pennyweight.

also, that "socialism/communism infographic" has some misleading points and is flat out wrong on others. i doubt Lucas made it up but now i'm wondering if he's trying to get into online lefty social media to try and score dates. been a while since he tried online dating, iirc after he was laughed off some fetish site.
 
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Twrx said:
Did his parents use food as a comfort for him? like if he was throwing a temper tantrum (which I'm sure was an hourly thing), would they give him a cookie to shut him the fuck up. I have never seen anyone so hyper focused on sex.
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They absolutely did. Lucas learned this coping mechanism in childhood and still uses it today. We've all seen him get upset or angry and gorge himself on all kinds of things. He has a very unhealthy relationship with food.

He's just going to continue to stuff himself with food because no woman (or young girl, which it seems this pedo is after) is going to submit to him. Luckily he's too inept to lure a young teen in. I remember being that age (like 13), and I'm pretty sure I would have recoiled and run for the hills after taking one look at this freak.
 
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Says the guy who uses slurs when his cries for Gen Z go unheard. The only curves Lucas will ever know are his rolls of fat.
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Maxxicus Callahan said:
Says the guy who uses slurs when his cries for Gen Z go unheard. The only curves Lucas will ever know are his rolls of fat.
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I'm noticing that a lot of his FB memes feature these delusional, blatantly untrue statements like "I know all your curves", "Suddenly I have a hot Gen Z girlfriend", "I love you too Gen Z", etc. It's like by typing out his fantasies he gets to inhabit them a little longer, immerse himself a little more. Then he just posts the shit without apparently caring at all how soul-destroyingly embarrassing it is for someone who's primarily known for being sexless to post his thirsty fantasies in the present tense, stated as fact.

Same thing with the sex poem. That one really got me because it says absolutely nothing. What is it about? It's about sex. What about sex, what does it have to say about sex? Uhh the man get hard and the lady get wet durr. It just excited Lucas to type sex words and superimpose them over a medical drawing of a vagina. He was just horny, and making sex words kind of rhyme and then sharing it under his real name on social media made him hornier. Then in some sort of bizarre brain malfunction or minor stroke event he used the word "kek" improperly and for no reason.

It's really amazing how solipsistic his internet posts are. As if he doesn't consider for a second how someone who's not Lucas Werner will feel about what he publishes, or how it makes him look. They're supposed to feel how he feels. It makes him feel good to write a gross, stupid sex poem, so you're supposed to like it. It makes him feel good to flatter himself with delusional bullshit about how Gen Z is secretly in love with him, so you're supposed to think that's true and extremely cool. Anyone who doesn't accept at face value his opinion of himself or how the world works is just a malicious bigot. This is all well-covered territory on this thread but damn, sometimes it really hits me how deeply, deeply stupid and crazy our boy really is.
 
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Gaear Grimsrud said:
Does Lucas think that zoomers are unable to acquire pizza without his help?
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Depends on what he's mad about that day.

If he's not bumcelraging, he's nonsensically altruistic in his eyes. "See the life I can provide?"

If he's bumcelraging, he'll nonsensically accuse his love interests of a variety of things. " You are a socialist generation. You don't love me because I'm poor. Despite my magical super semen, you choose flatbill capitalists with cars. My parents are about to croak. We can hunt elk and stew in a hot tub. We'll inherit (an ever increasing sum of wealth the wern supposedly despises) millions. Worship micro penis to have x-men babies. My mrsa will build their immunity. Come on gen z , provide me a female baby. Did I say that part out loud?"

- the wern, probably
 
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Maxxicus Callahan said:
His ideas here are just farts from eating an entire pizza to himself.

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there are only a handful of actual communist states left in the world because it's failed everywhere else with varying degrees of horror. i will happily volunteer to pull some strings and put him on a one-way flight to either mainland China or Vietnam. i'm sure, as a hardcore communist that hates capitalism, he'd love it there.
 
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Maxxicus Callahan said:
Says the guy who uses slurs when his cries for Gen Z go unheard. The only curves Lucas will ever know are his rolls of fat.
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I'm going to assume he has no idea how completely creepy that sounds and that no woman ever would find the fact that a homeless, balding freak has been staring at her so long he "knows all of her curves" romantic.
 
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Club Sandwich said:
there are only a handful of actual communist states left in the world because it's failed everywhere else with varying degrees of horror. i will happily volunteer to pull some strings and put him on a one-way flight to either mainland China or Vietnam. i'm sure, as a hardcore communist that hates capitalism, he'd love it there.
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Perhaps he should defect to north korea. Lucas could be like that american defector that was in the crossing the line documentary and boasted about how even when north koreans were starving to death in massive numbers they still fed him and how the state would feed and take care of him until his dying day

I can see him playing that part to a T, and being used by the government to show how capitalism and the US are evil because lucas is a literal walking definition of a lazy, incompetent, insane, morbidly obese american yet he still supports their ideology.....at least until the news of his defection dies down and he quickly gets thrown into a camp and left to starve/be worked to death all while screeching about how north korea isn't truly communist for not giving him a little asian girl to fuck.....which they wouldn't, they would at best just kidnap someone from some european country like they did with the other defectors

I mean isn't north korea exactly what lucas claims to want? Being treated as a celebrity, provided with free food, medical care and housing even when everyone else around him is starving to death because he's super important and even being provided a state mandated wife?

Though somehow I doubt posting his attraction signs in pyongyang would go over nearly as well as it does in spokane
 
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