Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

My impression is that Myrna copes with the anguish you mention by totally being in denial about it and her friend circle, seeking her well-being, are indulging that denial. What else would one do for a friend in that situation?

I agree that she definitely tries to cope through denial, but I also think she just straight up tries to cover up reality for her own narcissistic reasons.

That being said, I don’t think that she’s leading Lucas on by engaging with him in the way she does. His dad has fully cut off Lucas but Lucas still claims the elk kingdom. There’s evidence that Lucas’s dad has even told Lucas that he isn’t welcome. Yet he still tries to offer hot tubbing.

Lucas will continue to taut his parents wealth even if his mom cut him off more or wasn’t speaking to him. I think short of both parent making their own videos disowning and disinheriting him, he will keep doing what he’s doing. He has no choice really. He has nothing to offer so he offers the things his parents earned.

I don’t think I’d be willing to publicly disown Lucas if he was family just because of how much that would likely trigger him. And maybe they hope he will get his shit together.
 
Is anyone surprised by the fact that fatty can't shave without tearing up his face? Also, absent the beard, it reveals the recent fat-growth lumpiness and potatoish quality of his head...even more.

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Is anyone surprised by the fact that fatty can't shave without tearing up his face? Also, absent the beard, it reveals the recent fat-growth lumpiness and potatoish quality of his head...even more.

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42 in 2 days and can't even shave without cutting himself multiple times. Given its a nursing home you'd think there would be electric razors involved given that its usually a safety issue in those places to allow anybody unsupervised access to actual razors in case a dementia patient wanders in and steals it

That said i'm mildly surprised he hasn't demanded that the staff shave him. Thats a thing they do in places like that pretty often. It would be eerily similar to what suzanne did for him
 
Begging for money because he says he is broke yet the Freak ordered Squonk and now he is going to order another game he "designed".

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When did Squonk turn from "Squonk Turds" into just Squonk?

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Did Fatty decide that a game where the goal is to occuy turf with feces might be unappealing to the general public?
 
Begging for money because he says he is broke yet the Freak ordered Squonk and now he is going to order another game he "designed".

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wtf is 'north river?' it says 'rules to the game squonk' and then 'rules to north river' and then this:

North River is a tile laying game where you lay down tiles to represent terrain, make food products from animals and plants and try to enclose those tiles in road to capture and lock those terrains for points.
I get the feeling he copy/pasted rules from something else

and the 'I totally legit got on english honor role in college!' wrote this gem:
Once roaded in

and what the hell is with making bread and alcohol from 'herbs'

That entire list of rules is just outright insane gibberish
 
42 in 2 days and can't even shave without cutting himself multiple times. Given its a nursing home you'd think there would be electric razors involved given that its usually a safety issue in those places to allow anybody unsupervised access to actual razors in case a dementia patient wanders in and steals it

That said i'm mildly surprised he hasn't demanded that the staff shave him. Thats a thing they do in places like that pretty often. It would be eerily similar to what suzanne did for him
Real razors are a bacterial nightmare, especially for the MSRA prone Wern. He's the type who would use the same rusty ass dirty Disposable razors for weeks,rather than once or twice.

Yeah that food is straight out of the US Foods or Sysco truck but it beats cold oyster stew.
 
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When did Squonk turn from "Squonk Turds" into just Squonk?

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Did Fatty decide that a game where the goal is to occuy turf with feces might be unappealing to the general public?

Are we just going to ignore that Squonk is scribbled out and the working title here is not even Squonk Turds but "Turds of the Squonk".

Settle down with your scat fetish there, tubby, goddamn.
 
Are we just going to ignore that Squonk is scribbled out and the working title here is not even Squonk Turds but "Turds of the Squonk".

Settle down with your scat fetish there, tubby, goddamn.
Agreed.

Also, his love for baby nonsense words (Squonk, that other game he made where every aspect of it was a made-up word? I think it was supposed to be set in outer space? This is when he was living in the fart closet. I don't remember the name of that "game") is a window into his insanity.

His brain has terminal logorrhea.
 
He finally admits he’s in a group home.

That butternut squash looks nasty btw probably straight out of the can same with the brussel slaw on the side. Looks like Squonk turds whatever that green stuff is.
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He's admitted from the start that he was in a group home/boarding house/dorm setting, but always tried to hide that it was assisted living/nursing home.
 
Is anyone surprised by the fact that fatty can't shave without tearing up his face? Also, absent the beard, it reveals the recent fat-growth lumpiness and potatoish quality of his head...even more.

View attachment 2751235
"Looking like I fought off a bear"
No, Lucas, it looks like you cut and/or burnt your lips on a crack pipe.
wtf is 'north river?' it says 'rules to the game squonk' and then 'rules to north river' and then this:


I get the feeling he copy/pasted rules from something else

and the 'I totally legit got on english honor role in college!' wrote this gem:

and what the hell is with making bread and alcohol from 'herbs'

That entire list of rules is just outright insane gibberish
Rules to North River
North River is a tile laying game where you lay down tiles to represent terrain, make food products from animals and plants and try to enclose those tiles in road to capture and lock those terrains for points. Once a tile is roaded in you'll get 2 points for that tile. The roads and the animals within that can move from tile to tile and are both worth 1 point per enclosed tile.

Once roaded in, you can make your products: cheese, bread, sausage and alcohol by combining items in a prescribed way.

Each player starts with 5 gold coins, but the game has 100 coins total to use.

The object is to enclose as many tiles as you can while garnering the most points you can from those enclosures.

Each tile is worth 2 points.
Each road around a tile is worth 1 point.
Each livestock within is worth 1 point.

Cheese is 2 different milks on a tile. 3 points.
Bread is 2 different herbs. 3 points.
Sausage is 1 herb and 2 different meats. 4 points.
2 different eggs are pickled eggs. 3 points.
Alcohol is 3 different herbs. 5 points.

Items on their own are counted and counted again if they can be combined to form a product. Products must use items independent of one another and not repurposed. For instance, your herbs, if you only have 2 in the enclosure for your bread cannot be used in your alcohol if already being used. Roads can be counted multiple times because they are counted each time they, the roads, enclose a tile.

Once a parcel (tile) is enclosed by road, points are tallied and rewarded to the player who enclosed the parcel. All players can work any one tile per turn. Each turn consists of flipping over a face down tile face up from the stack onto the table and one move: laying 1 road around 1 perimeter or moving an animal from tile to tile for 1 coin per tile traversed or making 1 product by grouping the items together or grouping the items differently until the area is enclosed.

The meats all match to different terrains:

Milk animals (Mammals)

Goats from hills. Purple.
Cattle from fields. Yellow.
Pigs from forest. Green.

Egg animals (Birds)

Chickens from oases. Red.
Ducks from rivers. Blue.
Geese from marshes. Orange.

Eggs are white. Herbs are black.

Every color is a cube representative of the 6 animals, eggs and herbs. There are 8 colors of cubes.

Herbs come from every tile and are simply named for their terrain; hill herbs, field herbs, etc. Each tile automatically gets one herb and 1 animal once the tile is played on the table. An additional animal of the same type may be placed as well for them to mate for 1 coin to the bank and a new animal comes along through birthing on the next turn if noticed without a calf. Each tile can have 3 animals of a kind.

Enclosing an area also wins you 5 coins, which are useful because moving an item costs 1 coin per tile of crossing. Coins are worth 1 point each at the end of the game. Tiles can only be placed beside other tiles where they can combine to form a secondary color or divided into a primary color. In other words, every color, but the color opposite can lie adjacent to your placed tile:

Red and green cannot touch.
Yellow and purple cannot touch.
Blue and orange cannot touch.

You can draw a tile or use a tile you already have. Each tile you still have counts as -1 at the end of the game.

Points are tallied on a score track.

Components:

72 tiles
200 roads
400 cubes in 8 colors
1 score track
6 scoring meeples, 1 per possible player
1 box
Not that notable.
Nothing that will be recorded in the Wernology like Meeple Toss and Dance of the Telomeres.

It seems Lucas is in a resource game rut. I wonder if someone at the shelter (or just the shelter itself) has a box of Catan or some similar game in the common room that a few of the residents play which inspires Lucas to begrudgingly write his own knock-off version in the corner by himself.
 
"Wanna know how I got these scars? Well girly I got them from shoving a potato chip in my mouth the wrong way, now let me tell you about my magical sperm"

His face is so damn rounded now he looks like the fat conductor from Thomas the tank engine. Dude hadn't a jaw line before but now the whole damn thing is gone.
I wonder if he'll eventually reach "storing fat In the forehead " size eventually?

I'm pretty sure that he's heard about "dad bod" and thinks it means fat.
 
"Wanna know how I got these scars? Well girly I got them from shoving a potato chip in my mouth the wrong way, now let me tell you about my magical sperm"

His face is so damn rounded now he looks like the fat conductor from Thomas the tank engine. Dude hadn't a jaw line before but now the whole damn thing is gone.
I wonder if he'll eventually reach "storing fat In the forehead " size eventually?

I'm pretty sure that he's heard about "dad bod" and thinks it means fat.
He has claimed he has a “dad bod” on multiple occasions, it’s pretty clear he just thinks it means “fat.”
 
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