Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Fatal Walter]

I can only imagine that was from the same time period as this.

 

[WonderWino]

"One can be genetically The Incredible Hulk and live in a tiny one bedroom studio apartment looking for his anti-corporate queen and she still won’t reciprocate love because the guy doesn’t live in a big house on the hill, even if she admires his bulky, muscled green skinned rage at the villainies of Corporate American life in the 2 party dictatorship of 2019. "

Lucas is The Incredible Hulk

Lucas's version of himself as the hunk is probably alot like ben stiller in this, right down to getting pissy about being corrected:

Just replace spazzing out on top of a car with spazzing out on the sidewalk, and taking off in another car with getting hauled away by an ambulance afterwards

 

[Krathnami]

I can only imagine that was from the same time period as this.
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Conversations that didn’t happen

 

[Wernology]

"One can be genetically The Incredible Hulk and live in a tiny one bedroom studio apartment looking for his anti-corporate queen and she still won’t reciprocate love because the guy doesn’t live in a big house on the hill, even if she admires his bulky, muscled green skinned rage at the villainies of Corporate American life in the 2 party dictatorship of 2019. "

Lucas is The Incredible Hulk

He's gonna have to get to work at those PhDs...

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

He's gonna have to get to work at those PhDs...

All this down time he has in his new fart chambers and how slow the content has been, one can only assume Doctor Nigga must be making great strides on that 2000 page dissertation by now. Well, you know. In between preparing his platform for the next presidential election. He's a busy man.

 

[AnOminous]

Lucas is The Incredible Hulk

He isn't even an Amazing Bulk.

 

[MeganDodgedABullet]

View attachment 2953419
@Wernology inspired me to try and grab the best (worst?) possible stillframes of our boy Wern.

Look at that arrogance.

Look at that stringy mullet.

Even if Lucas never again produces any content on the order of what he's made in the past, his back catalogue is a veritable cornucopia of lolmilk.

Christ on a fucking bike. That face screams "I live in a town full of paroled nonces with no children allowed."

 

[Amewsed]

"One can be genetically The Incredible Hulk and live in a tiny one bedroom studio apartment looking for his anti-corporate queen and she still won’t reciprocate love because the guy doesn’t live in a big house on the hill, even if she admires his bulky, muscled green skinned rage at the villainies of Corporate American life in the 2 party dictatorship of 2019. "

Lucas is The Incredible Hulk

He's the incredible bulk; and the green skin is from the diabetes sores combined with poor hygiene.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Lucas actually posted this in earnest:

 

[WonderWino]

Lucas actually posted this in earnest:

View attachment 2957853

an odd thing to post from a guy who supposedly doesn't creep on little girls. It also comes off as a very manipulative attempt at trying to convince said little girls that 'i'm totally not like those other 40 year old creeps who leer at and follow little girls around! this is what you should do if any of them start doing stuff like that' like a literal walking stereotype of a predatory male feminist. Never mind that lucas is well aware of the fact he's known for following underage girls around, has taken creepy pictures of them, and for having inappropriate conversations with them that have ended with police involvement as well as having been literally caught on camera leering at them while trying to hide behind a garbage can

The more lucas tries to convince people he's not a predator the more of a predator he outs himself as

and holy shit - can you imagine lucas's response if the obvious highschool girl he was leering at in that picture of him skulking behind the dumpster had called out to some random woman a few feet a way, pointed at lucas and yelled 'mom! theres a creepy old guy staring at me and watching us from behind those garbage cans over there! call the police!' he'd have shit bricks and tried to waddle out of there as fast as his beetus feetus could carry him before the cops showed up

Also @Wernology definitely should bring this pic up the next time lucas gets wrangled into an outcast owls livestream. Lucas being put on the spot explaining why he posted that and having his history of creeping on underage girls as mentioned brought up would be fucking priceless

 

[Cheesegirl78]

an odd thing to post from a guy who supposedly doesn't creep on little girls. It also comes off as a very manipulative attempt at trying to convince said little girls that 'i'm totally not like those other 40 year old creeps who leer at and follow little girls around! this is what you should do if any of them start doing stuff like that' like a literal walking stereotype of a predatory male feminist. Never mind that lucas is well aware of the fact he's known for following underage girls around, has taken creepy pictures of them, and for having inappropriate conversations with them that have ended with police involvement as well as having been literally caught on camera leering at them while trying to hide behind a garbage can

The more lucas tries to convince people he's not a predator the more of a predator he outs himself as

and holy shit - can you imagine lucas's response if the obvious highschool girl he was leering at in that picture of him skulking behind the dumpster had called out to some random woman a few feet a way, pointed at lucas and yelled 'mom! theres a creepy old guy staring at me and watching us from behind those garbage cans over there! call the police!' he'd have shit bricks and tried to waddle out of there as fast as his beetus feetus could carry him before the cops showed up

Also @Wernology definitely should bring this pic up the next time lucas gets wrangled into an outcast owls livestream. Lucas being put on the spot explaining why he posted that and having his history of creeping on underage girls as mentioned brought up would be fucking priceless

Or the video where he was filming the two teenage girls walking down the street, and he was going on about how they were his ideal. I think a friend of one of the girls even came on here and said how creeped out the two young ladies were when they found out about it.

 

[mothman96]

Lucas actually posted this in earnest:

View attachment 2957853

an odd thing to post from a guy who supposedly doesn't creep on little girls. It also comes off as a very manipulative attempt at trying to convince said little girls that 'i'm totally not like those other 40 year old creeps who leer at and follow little girls around! this is what you should do if any of them start doing stuff like that' like a literal walking stereotype of a predatory male feminist. Never mind that lucas is well aware of the fact he's known for following underage girls around, has taken creepy pictures of them, and for having inappropriate conversations with them that have ended with police involvement as well as having been literally caught on camera leering at them while trying to hide behind a garbage can

The more lucas tries to convince people he's not a predator the more of a predator he outs himself as

and holy shit - can you imagine lucas's response if the obvious highschool girl he was leering at in that picture of him skulking behind the dumpster had called out to some random woman a few feet a way, pointed at lucas and yelled 'mom! theres a creepy old guy staring at me and watching us from behind those garbage cans over there! call the police!' he'd have shit bricks and tried to waddle out of there as fast as his beetus feetus could carry him before the cops showed up

Also @Wernology definitely should bring this pic up the next time lucas gets wrangled into an outcast owls livestream. Lucas being put on the spot explaining why he posted that and having his history of creeping on underage girls as mentioned brought up would be fucking priceless

@Wernology should include what he posted along with the picture of the Pedo standing behind the dumpster eye raping the group of teen girls. Also the videos he took of 2 teens walking downtown calling them "mommy material" and of the girls getting on the bus at the bus plaza.

ETA:
Also the screen shot where the Pedo says he followed a girl off the bus and stalked her for several blocks.

 

[Wernology]

@Wernology should include what he posted along with the picture of the Pedo standing behind the dumpster eye raping the group of teen girls. Also the videos he took of 2 teens walking downtown calling them "mommy material" and of the girls getting on the bus at the bus plaza.

ETA:
Also the screen shot where the Pedo says he followed a girl off the bus and stalked her for several blocks.

I always mean to save the garbage can lurking pic and forget every time.

That aside, I made the unholy mistake of searching the word "sex" on Lucas' facebook profile and there's a decent amount of trash in that that I haven't seen before so I'll probably go on a live and laugh about it later.

 

[ManfromtheMoon]

I can only imagine that was from the same time period as this.
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This is akin to chris chan viewing his daily chores as incredible feats of strength.

 

[Wernology]

Here, have some old insanity of Wern shit even I hadn't really looked at from mostly 2015 where he's talking about 16 "plus or minus 4 years" in his notes.

"Remember that time I watched y'all gang rape a 15 year old then went, 'no thanks' when it was my turn? I'M A GOOD PERSON!"

Also, some copy pasted text insanity, including a really, really specific fantasy that involves dead children, vomit, and ass & balls being shaken in his face.

Spoiler: It's very detailed and specific.

Lucas Werner
dec 2014 ·
I think I'd be a pretty good guy for a gal. I'm at home all the time. I don't do drugs. I don't drink very often. I don't smoke pot or tobacco very often. I cook most of my own food. I'm a pretty good roommate. They like me. I've lost a lot of weight since I last had sex 3 years ago. I exercise. I walk a lot.

I give food to the homeless and college kids. I'm smart. I'm funny. I'm interesting. I shower often. My hygiene has been consistent lately. I'm good with cats and dogs. I'm 420 friendly. I know I don't have a lot of money, but I'm responsible with what I do have and I try to use my time wisely.

I hang out a lot. I don't really do anything exciting, but I have my hobbies. I've really gotten into quantum physics. I'm mostly into something I call temporal physics. It's a discipline I created myself dedicated to the study of time, anti-time, space-time warpatures, blackholes, wormholes, time travel, cogency between temporal and anti-temporal system.
I'm slowly working on a book. I wrote an equation. I designed a shirt. I'm clever. I'm definitely clever. I'm really looking forward to an Elizabeth Warren Presidency because she's anti-corporate. I'm also looking forward to Mars One. Atheist men are better in bed than God because we actually exist.

From my experience, Christian dudes are both greedy and lazy, not to mention, violent and deceptive. If I was a chick, I wouldn't want to date a religious dude. It'd be like dating Lex Luther when there are so many Supermen out there. Well, I'm single. Younger women only. Thanks. I have my reasons. Those reasons being, I've never dated a younger women. When all else fails, you have to take the road untraveled.
Enjoy the snacks!

Questions? Comments?

rageconversation.weebly.com
~The Broke Atheist


August 9 2014.

All I hear in my head is "No one likes you." I'm a human being and a man on Earth. It feels like it's true. No one likes me. All I do. All I've accomplished. The man and person I try to be. The denial, hate and ignorance my closest family and friends assure me is not there.

It feels like those who love me are protecting me from the truth and the fact of the matter is, the love I seek isn't there. No one likes me. I don't want to die alone. I feel sick to my stomach like it will never be enough to find true true. If it happens when you least expect it, why do I feel compelled to seek it almost as if it were an animal instinct? Why do I feel empty?

It must be happening all around me and if "They don't like me" you, as a friend, would at least have the courage to lie to me and prove the lie to be true. Don't tell me they don't me. This is not what a friend would do.

I need to find a girl. I don't think you heard me. I said girl. Not a bunch of taunting. Seems a little gay, your taunts. Gay people don't bother me. Seeing gay people romantic with their partners doesn't gross me out.

You... shaking your ass and balls at me and asking if you can suck my dick makes me sick. I need some pussy. Your physical retort with your ass shaking ball shaking and request to suck my dick upon saying "I need pussy" makes my stomach acid bubble and my throat tighten. The rapey-gay actions of some upon the mere mention of the word VAGINA make me vomit.

Your balls and asshole are not for me. PUSSY ONLY. Oh, I see you think trying to give me a lap dance is funny, guy. I'm going to throw up if you're a guy and you act like a stripper around me when I requested you to stop acting like a female at a club.

I want the word "Hurl" to enter your mind as I say PUSSY and you interpret it as COCK. My throat is starting to tighten up. I really do love you guys, but we're all here on Earth and I am a man and a human being. You're a guy. You're gyrating your body anywhere near me or on me.
I feel like you want me to expel waste product from my stomach. When I say I need a girlfriend... does is it turn you into a rapey-homo, dude? Keep it away from me. Much love, but here comes the contraction of the inside of my mouth.

That feeling a dog gets when the dog is drawn to mow the lawn without a lawn mower. The feeling of a swollen tongue and visions of Walt Witman having a Lemon Party with dueling jean-swords as Tubgirl diarrheas Full Monty all over a mutilated child defecating it's brain from a fully opened cracked skull. I say I need pussy and there's you. Are you a male? Are you asking to suck my dick? Are you bringing your COCK ANYWHERE NEAR ME?

You're making my stomach acid problem worse.

 

[cuddle striker]

@Wernology that's the third-strangest thing I've read today. what in hell.

 

[Fatal Walter]

I like how he was using the word bae back in 2015 but it still didn't stop him from acting like it was the newest zoomer slang more recently.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

All this down time he has in his new fart chambers and how slow the content has been, one can only assume Doctor Nigga must be making great strides on that 2000 page dissertation by now. Well, you know. In between preparing his platform for the next presidential election. He's a busy man.

Either that or he's just eating all day and brainstorming insane and unplayable boardgames.
And then getting beat by literal speds at his own games.

Lucas actually posted this in earnest:

View attachment 2957853

"Every one of us has been there"
I mean you have been there in that scenario, Lucas.
You were the creeper.

Also @Wernology definitely should bring this pic up the next time lucas gets wrangled into an outcast owls livestream. Lucas being put on the spot explaining why he posted that and having his history of creeping on underage girls as mentioned brought up would be fucking priceless

Especially if @Wernology can manage to screen-share the pic with Mrz Parker present.
Could you imagine her reaction?

 

[Wernology]

I like how he was using the word bae back in 2015 but it still didn't stop him from acting like it was the newest zoomer slang more recently.

It was kind of interesting to find out he's been using the "my parents are rich and I'll inherit millions when they die" thing since 2015, I could've sworn that was a new tactic.

Especially if @Wernology can manage to screen-share the pic with Mrz Parker present.
Could you imagine her reaction?

if I had to guess, Lucas is going to start making it a thing that I'm not allowed as a guest, surprise or otherwise, on any podcasts or streams he's invited to.


This will be edited when I grab the pics I'm looking for but have some old facebook selfies.

From August 2015:

I couldn't figure out what this one was at first and I can't figure out if he just fucked up a Star of David because he drew stick Bernie Sanders with a Star of David for a face in another one but this is supposed to be about mixing religions/atheism in dating.

25 million and he's not going to believe in your "chubacabras" or "Krampas". Also 2015.

Just because the repeated 16 year old shit is gross.

More "$25 million, also I want a 16 year old!"

ARE U NOT HEARING ME I'M SAYING 25 MILLION!

Unrelated but this looks like a giant pile of actual shit.

...these were cookies. Cookies. Possibly one of the easiest things to NOT FUCK UP.

This was the million dollar shirt idea, it says "conversation".

25 MILLION WOMAN!

I'll just leave these here as I'm looking for his flowchart of Stick Bernie Sanders and the flatbill.

...peas and raisins inside of squash...

FINALLY! Here's the bizarre stick figure flow chart comic that makes no more sense in the morning. Just look at Nice Guy Stick Lucas on one knee with the rose saying, "I'm like Bernie" while the flatbill tells him to kill himself. This was also peak "Bernie Sanders is poor, he only has $350k!"
This one also shows that he knew age of consent was only 16 if you were within 48 months in age but is still using it to justify aiming for 16. This one is also from 2015.

I like how he was using the word bae back in 2015 but it still didn't stop him from acting like it was the newest zoomer slang more recently.

Lucas will be 80 (I know, I know, optimistic...) and still saying shit like, "Yeet me down a bae!"

 

[WonderWino]

I see lucas has a bright future ahead of him in IT technical writing with stickman flowcharts like that

and nothing says the note you're leaving is totally not creepy like going out of your way to literally write 'not creepy' in it. and its interesting that in that one note he pointed out that 16 is totally legal in WA '+48 months' which aside from the fact its 60 months aka 5 years, its also admitting, as far back as 2015 before the starbucks incident even happened that he knew creeping on 16 year olds was illegal. and for years afterwards claimed his obsession with 16 year olds was legal. He literally outed himself as a pedo doing pedo shit in writing. He sure is lucky none of the local news stations came across that picture when they were doing the starbucks story on him. That would have made the report on him alot worse and could easily have ended up with the cops showing up looking for him. No wonder he keeps trying to retcon it as 'she was totally 23!' these days