Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[WonderWino]

Does anyone know, has Lucas not been mooing lately? He privatized his FB posts to friends only. He hasn't posted in IG in like a week. Also, the troll pages on FB haven't posted any new content from him. Has anyone heard from the lolcow, Lucas Werner? He is probably due for another stint in the hospital since he immediately returned to his horrible diet after he got out with his earlier bout of renal failure? Anyone know anything?

Its a week until his birthday, so if he hasn't posted something regarding it by then i'd say its a sign something is up with him, probably health related. He never misses an opportunity to ree about his birthday

 

[Spunt]

Last time he let slip that he was on dialysis he went quiet for 2 weeks. Dialysis is exhausting, it puts you into a sort of metabolic shock, especially if you're overweight and generally unhealthy like Lucas.

 

[BowlOfDick]

Its a week until his birthday, so if he hasn't posted something regarding it by then i'd say its a sign something is up with him, probably health related. He never misses an opportunity to ree about his birthday

Ah yes the birthday the birthday…

Whilst obviously reminding Luke of his mortality, I also feel like this is another way to keep track of and indeed mark the anniversary of his dry spell with women. This will be what… the 12th year since he last had sex?

Board game book or a cookbook from mommy, if she remembers..
A small gesture from his roommate (who Lukey has no doubt tipped off in advance in the hopes of a nice prezzie)….

And that’s probably it. Lucas is extremely materialistic and views a birthday as a chance to hoard more things. Whilst the small collection of loser orbiters may wish him ‘happy birthday king’, he will be raging at the lack of material gain from this event.

On a psychological level, narcissists prize their birthday above all things; it’s a celebration of their own personal god… themselves. Also if I remember (wernographers and wernologists alike correct me if I’m wrong) that this might evoke painful memories of when mommy threw him a party in seventh grade and nobody came?

I pray to the cow gods that this will shift him back into his good ole angry self, although I fear we have a little time to wait yet.

 

[Al from Dadeville]

I just checked his page and he hasn’t posted anything friends-only since Nov 13. It does seem like something’s up even if he just got his phone stolen again

 

[WonderWino]

I just checked his page and he hasn’t posted anything friends-only since Nov 13. It does seem like something’s up even if he just got his phone stolen again

Probably not his phone getting lost, he seems to spend alot of times indoors this time of year. Makes me think its another dialysis treatment like @BowlOfDick mentioned. It certainly would fit. Usually he puts a few pre birthday hints out there to try to encourage people to give him something for his birthday but he hasn't done that with less than a week to go. Its out of character for him not to do this, so like you said something is definitely up

That said, these disappearances have happened several times since his dialysis announcement and seem to show something of a pattern of disappearing without warning and suddenly coming back without explanation and acting like nothing happened. Thats wern behavior for 'something is going on I don't want to talk about because it looks bad for me' which makes me think he's doing fairly regular dialysis treatments. Though it says alot he's eating the way he is if thats the case. The shit he's put out lately food wise is exactly the kind of shit a dialysis patient shouldn't be touching

 

[Al from Dadeville]

Probably not his phone getting lost, he seems to spend alot of times indoors this time of year. Makes me think its another dialysis treatment like @BowlOfDick mentioned. It certainly would fit. Usually he puts a few pre birthday hints out there to try to encourage people to give him something for his birthday but he hasn't done that with less than a week to go. Its out of character for him not to do this, so like you said something is definitely up

That said, these disappearances have happened several times since his dialysis announcement and seem to show something of a pattern of disappearing without warning and suddenly coming back without explanation and acting like nothing happened. Thats wern behavior for 'something is going on I don't want to talk about because it looks bad for me' which makes me think he's doing fairly regular dialysis treatments. Though it says alot he's eating the way he is if thats the case. The shit he's put out lately food wise is exactly the kind of shit a dialysis patient shouldn't be touching

That’s a good point. We should start noting the days he’s missing, if he has dialysis I think he should fall into a MWF or Tuesday/Thursday/possibly Saturday schedule. He could even be inpatient right now to get his port or fistula installed and his kidneys straightened out.
The shaking shit was awful too, maybe he’s somewhere having that taken care of

 

[WonderWino]

Wait a minute....

Has anyone noticed how much lucas looks like one of the danes from the troll trace episode of south park?



Same hat, same glasses, same hatred of 'online trolls' and desire to root them out

 

[Da Dude123]

It's Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving, my dudes. Do you all remember when that fat cow, Lucas Werner went and had Thanksgiving dinner at the homeless shelter? This was when he was still in the fart box. Remember how he had a to go box and filmed himself leaving the food next to some sleeping hobo out on the streets of Spokane? I do! I still think after he cut the camera that he got the box back for himself.

I sure would be thankful if Lucas would start moooing again. He has been radio silent for about a week.

 

[Twrx]

It's Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving, my dudes. Do you all remember when that fat cow, Lucas Werner went and had Thanksgiving dinner at the homeless shelter? This was when he was still in the fart box. Remember how he had a to go box and filmed himself leaving the food next to some sleeping hobo out on the streets of Spokane? I do! I still think after he cut the camera that he got the box back for himself.

I sure would be thankful if Lucas would start moooing again. He has been radio silent for about a week.

I'm not a gambler, but I would bet that he did yank the box back immediately.

 

[SteveGoatman]

I'm not a gambler, but I would bet that he did yank the box back immediately.

Agreed, and I'll also add this is another example of Lucas wanting to feel better/more important/more special/"apart" from other poor and homeless people. No matter how much he claims to be about solidarity and the empowerment of the poor/homeless, the very instant he has even the tiniest scintilla of elevation, real or imagined, over them he rubs it in their faces (his numerous rants after first getting a fartbox or other temporary housing) and/or carries out this kind of performative nonsense.

 

[Twrx]

Agreed, and I'll also add this is another example of Lucas wanting to feel better/more important/more special/"apart" from other poor and homeless people. No matter how much he claims to be about solidarity and the empowerment of the poor/homeless, the very instant he has even the tiniest scintilla of elevation, real or imagined, over them he rubs it in their faces (his numerous rants after first getting a fartbox or other temporary housing) and/or carries out this kind of performative nonsense.

He has always been the exact person/Boogeyman he has spent his life screaming about and railing against. And he knows it, it's why he loses his shit when he's called a creep and greedy.

 

[BowlOfDick]

I put ‘board game incel’ into an AI art generator and wasn’t disappointed..

 

[WonderWino]

I put ‘board game incel’ into an AI art generator and wasn’t disappointed..

View attachment 3924153View attachment 3924153

- Far more hair than lucas has
- Nowhere near as obese as lucas
- Clearly showers far more than lucas has in his entire life
- Actually removed the pieces from the box and set the game up to play. Something lucas never does with the expensive shit he buys to 'study' (i'm still wondering how exactly you study a game without playing it - does lucas just look at the box and its contents and listen to what the voices on the wind tell him about it?)

I sure would be thankful if Lucas would start moooing again. He has been radio silent for about a week.

The fact its been this long and theres less than 4 days until his birthday and he's not mooing and dropping hints for people to give him something says alot. He never misses an opportunity to get shit on his birthday like this. There is definitely something up. We should start keeping track of these 'random disappearances' and seeing if there is a pattern to them. The longer and more often this happens the more convinced I am its dialysis related. I'll laugh my ass off if those meals he was posting about fucked him up and put him back in the hospital. The timing is certainly right for it

As for thanksgiving, he is exactly the type of greedy obese hobo to go from shelter to shelter to get a special thanksgiving meal from each one to stuff himself with, and then goes home and makes another big meal of his own. He's pathologically food obsessed and if he had the money for it he'd be at least as obese as those people on those 700lb reality shows. I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if he eventually goes full tarrare and ends up back in the looney bin for good

 

[Stinkyboy]

Anyone checking obits?

 

[Da Dude123]

Anyone checking obits?

You know, I am not sure anyone would care enough to write an obituary on Lucas if he did die. The only thing his mom would do would make a pitty post on FB and talk about what a victim her bovine son was. But there likely would be no funeral and he almost certainly would be buried in a pauper's grave.

That is the thing, unless we had some inside person who worked in the social services field and deals directly with Lucas, we may not know if he did end up dying. If there is a public way to look up death records, I don't know about it. I know there are special restricted databases where authorized individuals can pull death certificates but those are not available to the public. You have to work in law enforcement, or be an attorney or a court clerk or work for the county clerk's office to have access to death certificates.

I did check the state of Washington Vinelink yesterday and he did not show up in the database as being incarcerated in the state of Washington. So, not in jail.

 

[Spunt]

We found out about his kidney trouble in August iirc. Median life expectancy once you are in diabetic kidney failure is 7 months, which gave him until next March, but that's just a Median figure and Lucas is in worse than average health, morbidly obese and completely non-compliant. Plus August was when we found out he was on dialysis, not necessarily when he started.

There's a pretty reasonable chance he's dead.

 

[WonderWino]

While I won't be surprised if lucas doesn't have much time left, short of a sudden heart attack I think its too early to expect him to die. If he had his mother would be broadcasting it all over her social media for pity points by now. As for obits we'll only see one for him if someone goes out of their way to write one, its not an automatic thing. He'd better hope no kiwi decides to do a last fuck you for everything he has done and publish an obit going into detail about his pedo escapades. That isn't the legacy he wants to leave on the internet for eternity

That said I came across this:

https://lowincomerelief.com/ebt/

It shows the kind of shit lucas can get with his EBT card and for being a hobo in different states. His mother better watch out, he could get some stuff in arizona he'd like:

Arizona​

Arizona has some sweet discounts! They offer the Double Up Food Bucks program for SNAP recipients when they use their EBT cards at participating Farmer’s Market locations. $1 spent with the EBT Quest card gains an extra $1 to spend on SNAP eligible fresh food and produce at the market.

Arizona also allows disabled, elderly, and homeless SNAP recipients to participate in the Restaurant Meals Program. These customers can use their EBT cards to purchase prepared meals at participating restaurants and retailers. It is important to note that only specific restaurants in specific locations participate in the Restaurant Meals Program, but don’t worry. We’ve got you covered.

As of June 31, 20221, eligible clients can use your SNAP benefits at over 300 fast food restaurants in Arizona. Only certain locations participate, so it’s important to check this list to make sure the location near you is participating.

You can visit the Phoenix Zoo, i.d.e.a. Museum, Arizona Science Center and so many other places for $5 or less per person with your EBT card! Get the details on this and Arizona’s other amazing EBT discounts here!

https://lowincomerelief.com/arizona-ebt/

Just think of all that extra food he could gorge himself with, and be close to his mother to mooch off of, without all those cold winters. Though being arizona he couldn't just go off and live in the woods when he got run out of shelters or fartboxes, he'd die out in the desert pretty fast. and probably piss off the wrong snake or scorpion

and in his home state of washington just look at what an EBT card can get him:

https://lowincomerelief.com/did-you-know-your-ebt-card-could-do-this/

The microwaved pizzas from 7-11 sound exactly like something lucas would jump on top of and claim he got it from some gourmet restaurant

....Though the thought of him showing up at the childrens museum and paying $2 with his EBT card to creep on little girls is more than a little concerning

 

[Monkey Shoulder]

unless we had some inside person who worked in the social services field

I swear there used to be someone in the thread who worked social services in Washington.

Median life expectancy once you are in diabetic kidney failure is 7 months

Where did you get that from?
Everything I've read says you can pretty much go on for years and years if you're on dialysis.

Do we know that his kidneys are completly shot, or are they just failing?

 

[Spunt]

Where did you get that from?
Everything I've read says you can pretty much go on for years and years if you're on dialysis.

Do we know that his kidneys are completly shot, or are they just failing?

It was a medical kiwi in this thread. Diabetic renal failure is much worse than regular renal failure (which as you say can be mitigated for years by dialysis if the patient is otherwise healthy). Dialysis absolutely wrecks your metabolism and blood chemistry in ways that diabetes makes much worse, reducing the effectiveness of the dialysis and making the shock it inflicts on the body much worse, hence the poor prognosis.

I'll see if I can find the post.

Edit: Post in thread 'Lucas Werner' https://kiwifarms.net/threads/lucas-werner.17234/post-12631402

 

[Monkey Shoulder]

It was a medical kiwi in this thread. Diabetic renal failure is much worse than regular renal failure (which as you say can be mitigated for years by dialysis if the patient is otherwise healthy). Dialysis absolutely wrecks your metabolism and blood chemistry in ways that diabetes makes much worse, reducing the effectiveness of the dialysis and making the shock it inflicts on the body much worse, hence the poor prognosis.

I'll see if I can find the post.

Edit: Post in thread 'Lucas Werner' https://kiwifarms.net/threads/lucas-werner.17234/post-12631402

Huh. Genuinely can't find a damn thing about this in my country's health publications.
Anyway, the original article does sseemingly spell doom for Lucas.

Still don't think he's dead yet though. Roach that he is.