Wow, Lucas really sounds like a call from to catch a predator when he tries to talk sexy. He is very similar to Lorne Armstrong. But he doesn't even change what he's talking about. He just keeps rambling about telomeres and age gap love and flat bill hats.
I listened to those voicemails on my drive home from work in a shitty old car that has an unfortunately awesome Bose system that it inexplicably came with.
If you think he's creepy on headphones or over computer speakers, it's about a million times worse on a really nice Bose surround sound system in a car.
Slimy Creep in 360 degree, locked in horror.
Presented without comment.
So, in no particular order...he lost weight, gained most of it back and it's only not obvious because he learned how to use angles and Facetune, became homeless after trying to convince other people in his apartment building into "giving him a chick" for sex or he'd report them for drug dealing, flunked out of college, had three involuntary psych ward stays, got catfished about a dozen times, lured by a catfish from Olympia to Spokane, got trolled on a podcast for months, lost his mind over a Chris Hansen Cameo, got kicked out of every homeless shelter in Spokane, banned from several restaurants, a C&D from the scientist he idolized, got some old fashioned domestic violence on his record, managed to not get laid since the 450lb Edition Lucas photo, had multiple dick pics leaked because he keeps sending them to catfish, had multiple Facebook posts (that are still up) in which he admitted to being a pedophile go public, left multiple creepy voicemails to both catfish and just completely random women he found on IG that are from or living in Spokane, and became increasingly mentally unstable.
That's an
interesting definition of success and of "good man".
The bar isn't on the ground, it's straight up
gone.
#LucasLogic
