Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[WonderWino]

While I know in my brain you're absolutely right, in my cold little black heart hope springs eternal at the thought of Lucas beat to shit in a ditch somewhere. Probably there after some 15 year old girl's older brother "cock blocked" him.

Or maybe he had a diabetic stroke and lost his entire left side's function.

Or maybe he got robbed of his eatin' out money.

And of course, the men with the butterfly nets.

Can you blame us for a little hope, in a world so utterly bleak right now?

This man's entire existence is a cosmic joke. Never before, anywhere in history, would a man this fucking retarded and predatory be able to survive this goddamn long.

Something will happen sooner or later, but probably not for awhile

....and when I read the stroke part it reminded me of vader dragging himself along the ground all burned to shit with his one functional arm. I can totally see lucas stroking out and using his one barely working arm to slowly drag his fat, half paralyzed ass up the road a few inches at a time toward the SCC, screeching in agony about bigots and how much he needs his puss puss. tbh if the force was actually a thing lucas would absolutely be one of those degenerate psychotic sith with weird obsessions that end up inevitably destroying him. In his case he would likely get himself killed trying to find some ancient holocron filled with sith secrets of getting pussy, made by some imperial PUA centuries earlier. 'Wheres the party at jedi? Stop hoarding all the younglings you bigots!'

.....Then again this is lucas we're talking about, he wouldn't last five minutes on korriban, let alone survive any trials to become a sith in the first place. Hell he would need an imperial officer to fill out the academy application for him, and even if he got that far he'd just sit in a corner of the academy cantina staring creepily at the 15 year old students, mumbling to himself about the correlation between age, midichlorians and long telomeres until he got thrown out on his ass for being a creep

 

[Da Dude123]

I wish we knew if Lucas has returned to the Cannon Street shelter. If he has lost his phone I bet he is miserable. I bet he is on it almost every waking second. Plus, that and his earbuds keep the voices on the wind at bay. I am sure the voices insult Lucas and tell him he isn't plenty good.

Like I said, if he got kicked out of Cannon, he may be living in an opium den. But yeah, his phone may be no more. And if he is not in the funny farm, then it most certainly is broke or gone. And Lucas has no way to go buy another budget android phone, till his tugboat returns to port. But he is ready to be a dad! He sooo is...

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Lucas could get a free Obama phone and plan, and those plans are Unlimited Wifi and Text as long as the Covid bullshit exists. But, it's best he keeps buying a new phone every few months like the dipshit he is.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

I don't know what's worse about Lucas' fatherhood delusion:
1) the fact that Lucas can't take care of himself, much less a child
2) the implied molestation of any future daughter
2) the idea of Lucas bearing little Wern Juniors who idolize and look up to their old man out onto to world

 

[ThomasAudley]

Lucas could get a free Obama phone and plan, and those plans are Unlimited Wifi and Text as long as the Covid bullshit exists. But, it's best he keeps buying a new phone every few months like the dipshit he is.

In a Golden USB episode he said he had one of those and just threw it away because it was hard to use.

I also don’t think his phone has CP on it. CP isn’t generally something that’s easy to find, and no porn website is gonna risk hosting it in the clear. Lucas is too stupid to figure out Tor or chan sites and he’s too fucking weird, even by pedo standards, to be in a pedo network himself where he’s paying to access it. Is his phone full of pics of underage girls from Instagram, absolutely, but is it full of actual illegal CP? I doubt it.

 

[Maxxicus Callahan]

Lucas if he claimed to be an anarcho-capitalist

Edit: Lucas has never mentioned terms like Hebephilia or Ephebophilia, doubt he knows what that those words are. But I’ve always thought it was funny that he justifies his attractions to underage girls based on “science” like that makes it right. I wonder how other nonces and pedos justify themselves they know it’s wrong maybe they don’t care. I feel if they did care they’d seek out treatment or some kind of therapy

 

[Josef Mengele]

Man I love making these photoshops of the Wern! I call this one The Greed of Generation Z, also this one has an easter egg in there if you are a To Catch A Predator fan.

 

[mothman96]

In a Golden USB episode he said he had one of those and just threw it away because it was hard to use.

I also don’t think his phone has CP on it. CP isn’t generally something that’s easy to find, and no porn website is gonna risk hosting it in the clear. Lucas is too stupid to figure out Tor or chan sites and he’s too fucking weird, even by pedo standards, to be in a pedo network himself where he’s paying to access it. Is his phone full of pics of underage girls from Instagram, absolutely, but is it full of actual illegal CP? I doubt it.

Back in Aug 2016 the Pedo Freak posted CP to his FB so he does know how/where to find it. Go down a few posts on pg 74.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/lucas-werner.17234/page-74

 

[Mother Fucker]

(To the beat of Summertime Sadness by Lana Del Rey)

I got my crusty coat on tonight
Gimpin' in the dark, no bed in the shelter tonight
Had a chimpout real big, pedo freak style
My heel flops, I'm barely alive!

There's, no God, just voices in the air
Telomeres, below, are sizzlin' in my pair
Honey, I'm on fire, I got MRSA down there
Parents don't call me anymore
(One, two, three, four)

Fist me hard before you go
Spokane Sperg sadness
I just want your fecund womb
But baby, you're a bigot

 

[ThomasAudley]

(To the beat of Summertime Sadness by Lana Del Rey)

I got my crusty coat on tonight
Gimpin' in the dark, no bed in the shelter tonight
Had a chimpout real big, pedo freak style
My heel flops, I'm barely alive!

There's, no God, just voices in the air
Telomeres, below, are sizzlin' in my pair
Honey, I'm on fire, I got MRSA down there
Parents don't call me anymore
(One, two, three, four)

Fist me hard before you go
Spokane Sperg sadness
I just want your fecund womb
But baby, you're a bigot

I like this idea, here's my Lucas version of Driver's License by Olivia Rodrigo:

I got my tard disbursement last week
Just in time to end my pussy drought
'Cause you're ready for me gen Z
To finally make you my spouse
But today I walked through the suburbs
Crying and ranting in my phone

And you're probably with that young guy
Whose short telomeres make me shout
He's so more misogynistic than me
He's everything I scream about
Yeah today I walked through the suburbs
Cause I can't go to Riverfront or else

And I know you're not perfect but I still need my gen z hun
And I just can't imagine how you ignore the signs I've drawn
Guess you didn't mean what you said about Bernie, gen Z
Cause you said you're leftist now I rant alone in the street

All the hobos are tired
Of hearing how much I love you but
I kinda feel sorry for them
'Cause they'll never know agegap love the way I do
Yeah, today I walked through the suburbs
And pictured I was in an alley fisting you

And I know you're not perfect but I still need my gen z hun
And I just can't imagine how you ignore the signs I've drawn
Guess you didn't mean what you said about Bernie, gen Z
Cause you said you're leftist now I rant alone in the street

Red lights, stop signs
I still feel your mace
When I ignore them
Can't walk past the places
I used to
Go to
'Cause I'm still fucking banned from them

Sidewalks,
I eat off
I still hear the voices
On the wind
They're laughing
Over all the noise
God, you're not there
Know it's true
But I still pray for my queefy bae

 

[AbraCadaver]

People are falling into the age-old trap of thinking that an absence of Lucas content = something cool has happened.

He’s lost his phone. I put 50,000 telomeres and a $2m elk inheritance on it.

Do not speak so lightly of the Elk Kingdom, sir. It is not yours with which to barter or trade.

I always imagine the Elk Kingdom to be that elven kingdom in Mirkwood in the first hobbit movie. Just a bunch of snobby elves who won’t let Lucas crash with them, plus a fucktonne of magnificent elk running about.

Lucas’ stepdad sits on that big tree throne and demands that if Lucas wishes to rejoin the clan, first he must swear fealty and stop talking about wanting to fist young girls.

Lucas, wearing the fur tunic and cloak of many a beast slaughtered by his hands to roast upon the communal toaster oven, glares at King Roy, raises his arms and bellows to the heavens. “I WOULD NOT CEASE WANTING TO FIST YOUNG GIRLS, SHOULD THE END OF ALL DAYS BE UPON US!”

 

[moseph.jartelli]

Lucas, wearing the fur tunic and cloak of many a beast slaughtered by his hands to roast upon the communal toaster oven

I imagine the cloak to be more lunatic attraction signs and raw, limp bacon.

 

[WonderWino]

Back in Aug 2016 the Pedo Freak posted CP to his FB so he does know how/where to find it. Go down a few posts on pg 74.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/lucas-werner.17234/page-74

Its worth mentioning he has been temp banned from fb for doing that several times at this point. I still find it odd they only temp ban him for it, let alone that they don't report it to the cops like companies are supposed to when things like that happen

But yeah, he definitely knows where to find it. More to the point, if he is posting pics of it then it stands to reason he has pics from such sites he hasn't posted and has a history of visiting said sites. That isn't something you'd just randomly find on the internet when looking for meme making material, he had to go looking for it and you can bet he had it bookmarked

 

[Josef Mengele]

Its worth mentioning he has been temp banned from fb for doing that several times at this point. I still find it odd they only temp ban him for it, let alone that they don't report it to the cops like companies are supposed to when things like that happen

But yeah, he definitely knows where to find it. More to the point, if he is posting pics of it then it stands to reason he has pics from such sites he hasn't posted and has a history of visiting said sites. That isn't something you'd just randomly find on the internet when looking for meme making material, he had to go looking for it and you can bet he had it bookmarked

The problem with FB is that they are inundated with CP groups, tons of private groups that share it (Insider article). Why would they go after the Wern posting a single photo (not that meant to demean or downplay the severity of the offense) when they have large abuse rings. The Wern is also probably on the feds radar, but since there are tons of people running servers and mass downloading it most likely means Lucas is somewhere on the bottom of that list. Most likely they haven't had time to dedicate a full investigation into Lucas' posting and they just hit him with a boilerplate: you broke the rules sit in FB jail sentence. But you would hope that the Feds could be able to slap Dr. Luke with an investigation, it would be great to see him with a felony and be unable to receive SSI benefits.

 

[AnOminous]

Why would they go after the Wern posting a single photo (not that meant to demean or downplay the severity of the offense) when they have large abuse rings.

Because they look like absolute shit when they sit there with their thumbs up their asses while someone literally posts CP publicly? Remember the last guy like this who publicly did shit like this was Nathan Larson who went on to kidnap a 12 year old, quite possibly with the intention of raping and then murdering her.

 

[WonderWino]

Because they look like absolute shit when they sit there with their thumbs up their asses while someone literally posts CP publicly? Remember the last guy like this who publicly did shit like this was Nathan Larson who went on to kidnap a 12 year old, quite possibly with the intention of raping and then murdering her.

This, plus the fact they're technically legally required to report such things. Technically they risk losing their CDA immunity and potential charges for failing to do so. There are all kinds of legal obligations that are a part of running a website on the part of the owner

Also, as AnOminous pointed out, people that post stuff like that are much more likely to do other illegal shit involving kids, such as kidnapping. Not that lucas has the brains or ability to do so, given his current circumstances, but if lucas were to graduate from posting stuff like that to trying to grab some little girl in the park or whatever, it would be an utter shitshow for fb's PR and legal department if it ever got out that he had a history of posting CP for years prior to it and never got more than a temp ban. That would lead to quite a few questions getting asked and fingers getting pointed, especially given his history and how known he is publicly. Its not like people haven't reported him to alot of organizations over the years, including fb. I suspect his case manager would have some difficult questions to answer as well in such a situation, as either he isn't doing his job keeping at least a general eye on his behavior and actions, or he is, knew about lucas's 'interests' and didn't do anything about it

Its also not fb's job to do the investigation. They just confirm the user details and that it was CP and send it off to the cops. The investigation side of things is their job

That said, i'm surprised he hasn't been catfished into sending that microdick pic of his to someone he believed to be 16 year old at this point. I doubt he would think twice about doing so if asked by one, still clinging to his '16 is legal bigots!' nonsense and completely unaware that even if that were true, its still illegal to send that stuff to anybody under 18 and that its covered by a different law entirely. If he ever does something like that and gets caught he's fucked. Even if he somehow avoided a serious sentence and got off lightly he'd still lose his SSI and all that, and with that on his record would be virtually unemployable by anybody but the companies that take the seediest people like junkyards

 

[Da Dude123]

Even if he somehow avoided a serious sentence and got off lightly he'd still lose his SSI.[/QUOTE]

I don't think Lucas has a case manager anymore. I think outside his payee he is not seeing anyone regularly for help, besides the poor people who run the shelter. Since he believes he is plenty good anyways. And furthermore, they weren't helping him find a Gen Z girlfriend, so what use are they anyways?

Also, power level, I used to work in the corrections system and there are tons of convicted felons who get tardbux. In fact, that is the goal of many of them. It's unreal. You will get guys on disability for something like asthma who smoke pot everyday. And guys who can't work but still can break into buildings repeatedly. But our government is happy to give them our tax dollars, so long as they are not locked up.

 

[Mother Fucker]

I still find it odd they only temp ban him for it, let alone that they don't report it to the cops like companies are supposed to when things like that happen

The Zucc is scared to cross Lucas. Remember, he's going to sue Facebook, Cloud Flare, Chris Hansen, and Starbucks for millions of dollars for slander and libel.

His lawyer is just having a hard time building a case cause, you know. One of the elements of libel is that the statement is untrue, and every bad thing anyone has ever said about Lucas is undeniably true. That, and it's hard to damage someone's reputation when they're already a homeless, jobless bum with virtually no professional work history and have already openly admitted to various pedophile shit.

 

[Wernology]

The Zucc is scared to cross Lucas. Remember, he's going to sue Facebook, Cloud Flare, Chris Hansen, and Starbucks for millions of dollars for slander and libel.

His lawyer is just having a hard time building a case cause, you know. One of the elements of libel is that the statement is untrue, and every bad thing anyone has ever said about Lucas is undeniably true. That, and it's hard to damage someone's reputation when they're already a homeless, jobless bum with virtually no professional work history and have already openly admitted to various pedophile shit.

I'd forgotten about the, "I'm gonna sue Facebook, Cloud Flare, Kiwi Farms, and Chris Hansen!" recent nonsense.

Pretty sure he was trying to find a pro bono attorney in Spokane to help him and 100% sure if he did manage to call any they laughed and hung up.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

A jail sentence would only delay his SSI, the only way I've seen that anyone loses SSI is if they screw up having too many assets. In the US, once you get on SSI, which is lengthy and can be difficult, you're golden once you got it. Other countries are much better in handling this.