✨ Celebrity Madonna - elderly woman mired in existential crisis.

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While I've never read an account from Guy Ritchie himself, her son Rocco has stated living with her is hell with how hypocritical her parenting style is. Whether this is truth or not, one mustn't forget journos love to twist stories.

Here are two articles about Rocco's words about what living with her is like:



I'm inclined to believe it must be very difficult with her Cluster B personality traits, must feel like walking on eggshells all the time.
getting a court order to force your child to join you again,
if he wants to live with his father where he has stability, let him

shouldve been so hypocrytical to your kids, you can run around naked on stage but when ur kids want to watch some tv its out of the question breh
 
This is a good inventory of how much work Madge has gotten done. It is way more, and been happening for way longer than I knew. The youtuber believes the work she's gotten done is to look otherworldly, but I highly doubt that. She's as youth obsessed as they come
Madonna: Plastic Surgery (1985-2021) - Fillers or Photoshop?
For some reason I thought she would be above this shit because, in the words of Cher, "she's not beautiful", and never has been. I guess she hasn't accepted that after all.
 
For some reason I thought she would be above this shit because, in the words of Cher, "she's not beautiful"
Cher is on shaky ground.

She had movie-star looks and now she's the poster girl for plastic surgery. Not worth it in my eyes. Though I guess most septuagenarians would rather look like Cher.
 
Cher is on shaky ground.

She had movie-star looks and now she's the poster girl for plastic surgery. Not worth it in my eyes. Though I guess most septuagenarians would rather look like Cher.
Good point, I hadn't taken in Cher's altered looks. Here is the interview I was referring to in regards to that quote:

I guess I perceive the difference between the two as being that Cher, in my opinion, is (was) naturally good looking, while Madonna has always been average, yet distinct, but despite that she thrived due to sheer ambition.
 
This is a good inventory of how much work Madge has gotten done. It is way more, and been happening for way longer than I knew. The youtuber believes the work she's gotten done is to look otherworldly, but I highly doubt that. She's as youth obsessed as they come
Madonna: Plastic Surgery (1985-2021) - Fillers or Photoshop?
For some reason I thought she would be above this shit because, in the words of Cher, "she's not beautiful", and never has been. I guess she hasn't accepted that after all.
I actually think that Madonna looks gorgeous in the very first picture shown in the video, before she started getting work done.

She used to look like a silent film actress. Very pretty.
 
Ah grandma is getting creepy. I can’t up it but she was on Jimmy Kimmel basically being gross. And like anyone ever asked for yet another documentary on her life or lack thereof.
 
I actually think that Madonna looks gorgeous in the very first picture shown in the video, before she started getting work done.

She used to look like a silent film actress. Very pretty.
Yeah she was gorgeous. Ngl people are being too harsh in here, she didn't even start to look or feel 'old' until she was in her 50s (4 Minutes/Hard Candy album era). These pics are only 3 years apart

2004_ukhallfame.jpg
1-5.jpg
 
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Madge mockery from teh gayz who write for the Unsinkable Kimmy Schmidt.

“I humbled myself and joined the saddest gospel choir outside Madonna's tour bus, just like Jesus would have.”
 
"How many people can say they slept with Madonna?"

"Thousands, Murdoch. Possibly hundreds of thousands. And so many blacks..."
 
Never found her that hot, but she was already in her 40s when I was barely a teen
Yeah she was gorgeous. Ngl people are being too harsh in here, she didn't even start to look or feel 'old' until she was in her 50s (4 Minutes/Hard Candy album era). These pics are only 3 years apart

2004_ukhallfame.jpg
1-5.jpg
Hit the wall at Mach 3, or the botox stopped working
 
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Never found her that hot, but she was already in her 40s when I was barely a teen
People say she was the female MJ.

Gaga's Fame Monster, Miley's Bangerz, and Beyonce's self-titled and Lemonade; none of them can touch Madonna in her prime. ofc she didn't have much competition. Madonna practically ruled MTV for fifteen years.

The field is much wider today. It would be like comparing Ric Flair to the wrestlers of now.
Hit the wall at Mach 3, or the botox stopped working
Madonna looks like if Marilyn Monroe had a shellfish allergy.

To be fair, she was my first crush. Back then, she rarely failed a charisma check. (I don't normally go for that high Germanic look.)
 
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Grace Jones and Lennox had major talent and are real artists. Madonna was more of a great marketer and was very wise in choosing talented people to make her look and sound better. Madonna had a good eye for talent in others and latching onto to ppl who could keep her up on the latest trends and what was hip.

The two kids, a husband, then a bunch of adopted kids and a divorce took her focus elsewhere. She took her focus off the pulse of pop music for fifteen years - which was fine. A fifty year old shouldn’t be trying to be a sexy hip young pop star. But at some point Madonna decided that exactly what she should be doing and it’s awful.

She seems lost without being top of the charts pop star in the limelight. She tried having and adopting a bunch of kids to fill the void but that didn’t work, so now she’s trying to work with pop stars her daughters age. I do wonder what the hell Lourdes thinks of her.

Grace Jones is interesting but in her own way was a bit pretentious (releasing an entire album of the same song done in different styles with interview audio talking about how great she was between them anyone?). Annie Lennox was great but there is a MASSIVE divide between Lennox in Eurhythmics and her solo stuff. Her Eurhythmics stuff was varied and all of her hits were different styles so you could tell she was having fun experimenting. But her solo stuff was ("Walking On Broken Glass" aside) pretty much the same old stuff, endless dreary ballads and it makes one glad Shirley Manson told David Geffin to get bent when he tried his best to bribe Manson with a big push as a solo artist if she would just cut her hair and basically become a Lennox clone because Geffin got tired waiting for Annie to make another album of dreary ballads.

That said, the exact moment Madonna's career went into the toilet was when she cut the deal she made with Missy Elliot to let Elliot use some of her songs for sampling in exchange for remixing some of her new work and Madonna churning out a cash grab album (American Life) to make new music for Elliot to remix.

The album's title track did unspeakable damage to Madonna; not just it's garbage rap section but also because it was an anti-war song and that the video was anti-Bush and got her officially blackballed from radio via Clear Channel. It sold badly, and she no longer had MTV to pimp her shit like they did up until that point as MTV officially was out of the business playing music videos at that point and the blacklisting continued when she rebounded with her last great album Confessions on the Dance Floor.

Confessions underperformed in spite of positive reviews and Madonna was forced to go on a massive touring campaign (complete with bringing songs like Material Girl out of retirement) to keep her coffers full and then came Lady Gaga, who did what not even Brittany Spears could do and dethrone Madonna. Everything since then has bene Madonna DESPERATELY trying to stay relevant and her desperation is blatant in her last couple of albums.

Does anyone else remember that rumor back in the 80's that she was fucking Chris from that band Enuff zNuff and he was so trashed he passed out during and ended up pissing inside her? That was a huge rumor back when I was a wee lil Madonna fan.
The main Madonna rumor I remember from the 80s was that she got knocked up by Sean Penn in 1985 and rather than take a year or two off and have the kid, she had an abortion which led to her becoming estranged from her father over her putting her career over her unborn child. And that she promptly wrote "Papa Don't Preach" as a "fuck you dad" response with the song being her accusing her father of hypocrisy since if she got pregnant as a teenager, he'd be screaming "get me a coat hanger!" and made her get the abortion.

I know we're here to make fun of her, but let me defend Madonna a little bit:
Madge was never an amazing singer, but in her glory days (pre-1995) she had a real artistic presence. She isn't, and never was, an immense talent, but in her early years I seriously contend that she had an artistic genius rarely seen - in the same vein as Michael Jackson. Her songs and especially her music videos were, at the time, very transgressive - especially since anti-sex feminism was rife in the early 90s. She projected a sensual, dangerous and glamorous persona in an era where women were deliberately trying to make themselves ugly as a feminist statement (yes, this really happened). She had a true sense of mischief and transgression - she was a Catholic schoolgirl, and nobody knows naughty subjects better. This is exemplified in a famous clip of her performance of Vogue at the 1990 MTV Awards, posted below. Her stage presence, glamour, daring and rich, sumptuous feminine energy are in full display:


Then, in the mid-90s, she had a kind of artistic menopause, when her creative fertility withered. She was no longer dangerous or glamorous, her music wasn't as good, and wasn't as revolutionary, and she just sorted of faded into crazy old rich lady territory. I think it was because her immense fame (and although most of us Kiwis are too young to remember, it was immense fame) divorced her from reality. She became too insulated and isolated to know what transgression was, and entered the cold, solipsistic, artless world of a rich narcissist - where she remains to this day. It's eerie that the famous clip above shows her dressed cheekily as Marie Antoinette, because that is exactly who she became.

Madonna didn't quite fall in the 90s but her Sex period pretty much damaged her career mightily and rendered her a punchline to a lot of people. "Bedtime Stories" was an attempt at a comeback but "Take A Bow" and "Evita" was Madonna trying to course correct and reformat her public person as having "grown up" and being "more mature". Getting pregnant/having a kid and finding Kabalahism was part of that rebranding an Ray of Light and Music was Madonna doing what she did years later with Confessions on the Dance Floor: put out timeless dance music with an affirmative message to show she still has it.

But Madonna's fall came when she didn't have MTV to prop her up and promote her work/status as a major figure. She got fucked over by Clear Channel but Confessions still got rave reviews. But without MTV to run promotion for her, Madonna lost a lot of her connectivity with her audience and that was where her disconnect REALLY sank in.

The rise of Gaga was the final straw, since Gaga did what Beyonce, Spears, Aguillera, Lauper, Houston, etc could not do and pretty much replace her as the resident female pop culture chameleon.

ironically, going the Lennox route (all ballads, all the time) could have saved her but she doubled down on trying DESPERATELY to be the young hip "it" girl while producing some of the most god-awful narcisistic crap (Bitch I'm Madonna is so god-awful that it makes me embarassed to be a fan of hers) ever released.

And I think that even Madonna knows it, since it's been speculated that her Covid breakdown videos were all about her dealing with how fall she fell, especially since she was fully expecting to have long overdue hip replacement surgery spring 2020 then spend the rest of the year recoverying/rehabbing and not only was the surgery canceled but she had to finally start using painkillers because her hip pain had reached the point that her longstanding "no pain pills" pledge could no longer be held due to her being in utter agony and it and the liquor she was drinking and her realization that her new album was underperforming just like the last couple of ones, and the existentialism of COVID (she was stuck in a mansion without a fully stocked grocery supply because she was utterly caught unprepared for lockdown) caused her to have a complete breakdown.
 
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Madonna DID court a lot of negativity with her shock antics and, let’s be honest, good-at-best singing skill. She was better at marketing herself than standing behind a microphone.

However people like Beyonce have fan bases that are probably 80% women and gay lads and that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s because all the straight men think she’s a bad singer. It’s just not their thing personally. I think it was your quoting this kind of figure that made me think you were saying she wasn’t as big a star as most because she didn’t garner enough straight male fans.

I think Prince did better because he had mass appeal and didn’t lean too hard into one demographic. It’s also generally harder for female singers overall to garner appeal over both male and female listeners, especially decades ago, the same way women are fine with going to action movies but most men won’t sit through anything advertised as a “chick flick.” Male media is considered the acceptable neutral norm and “women’s media” is assumed to be only for women’s consumption.

Michael Jackson, otoh, was a feckin freakshow all the time and it’s no wonder he unsettled people so much.

Edit: but to be clear I agree with you, I found/find her an annoying tryhard much of the time, even before Mags started becoming Granny Cougar.

Prince's war with his label and his decision to wholesale reject the mainstream afterwards pretty much decimated his fanbase down to the most hardcore of hardcore fans. Prince stopped being relevant after Diamonds and Pearls (though if you want to be generous, you could argue Gold Experience though by that point even MTV stopped playing his music). And Prince knew it and it was a massive fucking issue because a lot of fans wanted the older raunchier Prince and had no time for born again Christian Prince who became the embodiment of the longtime act who only plays new stuff in concert and you're lucky if you get a classic hit during the encore. And the Crystal Ball debacle did him no favors either in terms of pissing off even his die-hards.

Same thing in a way happened to Cindy Lauper: she had two albums people care about (three if you want to be generous and charitable relating "Hole In My Heart" and "I Drove All Night") and while she's still around, her live performances are an inane attempt to get her fans to accept her new stuff while still trotting out her old stuff her fans want to hear.

Ironically both Madonna and Jackson managed to avoid this trap
 
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