Prison Letters May 11, 2022 - Chris writes letter trying to shift blame to Barb

[The Dude]

@The Dude You're way overthinking things.
1. Chris got sent to the Nut Hut because his constant bullshit was making it impossible for him to meaningfully participate in his defense, and there was some question as to his competance to stand trial. Stop making everything about Chris's emotional state. The Jailers don't care is something like Chris is having a mental breakdown in the Medical cells. That's any day ending in Y for them. That's what hoses are for.
2. The Nut Hut pretty clearly worked because based on this latest letter Chrtis seems to have figured out that what he did was bad, and in true Chris fashion, is seeking to blame others, particularly the victim. "She was asking for it back on 2012!" This is what is known as Consciousness of Guilt. Which means he is competent enough to stand trial.
3. Chris does not want to admit he got sent to the Psyche Hospital because people might think he is crazy. And not a wise benevolent God/Jesus/Woman/PrettyPrettyPony. He has a sense of self and the ability to be embarrassed by things. Once again competent to stand trial. The staff at the psyche ward almost certainly saw right through Chris and his bullshit within minutes. Which is probably why he doesn't want to talk about it. Although at some point I do expect Chris to declare in open court that "He is perfectly sane and has the papers to prove it!"

I think Chris having a massive tantrum because he wasn't relased in time for his birthday like the script he'd written in his head said he should is a far simpler explanation than "Chris' Jesus Merge routine was making things difficult for his lawyer." Especially when you take into account evidence like the letters he had sent out to people insisting they recite the incantation he had written to get him out of jail. It's obvious being locked up in jail was beginning to negatively impact Chris' emotional/psychological state in a major way, so it really isn't a stretch to entertain the possibility that it finally came to a head and Chris threw a major tard tantrum.

And Chris always knew that what he did to Barb was wrong, even before the call got leaked and forwarded to the police. Chris was in communication with Null before his arrest and was bragging about his new girlfriend who was "and older woman". Chris knew that if he admitted he was shtupping his own geriatric mother that Null would be upset and would stop helping Chris fund his trip to the ponyfag convention. Even after Chris was arrested he continued to lie about everything, saying it was "soul bonding" to heal his mother and now telling people the leaked call was fake news and a faith test for his followers. Chris has known it was wrong and illegal the whole time. It certainly isn't just dawning on him now. The gravity of the situation maybe, but not the wrongness of it. He's been trying to weasel out of responsibility for his actions ever since he was forced to leave 14BC when the investigation first began.

Edit: I definitely agree with you that the staff at the psych facility knew that Chris was faking/not really crazy with his "Jesus bringing about the Toon Town Merge" delusions. It's their jobs to recognize genuine mental illness, and all of Chris' power fantasies have all been nothing but a coping mechanism for some Autistic loser to comfort himself with. But I'm also sure that they were better able to diagnose whatever else besides Autism is wrong with Chris that is the underlying contributor to his behavior and thought processes. He's not a Schizo or anything, but there's something more than simple Autism that's likely happening in Chris' head.

 

[A Grey Cat]

Not just that, but the entirety of the potential WWIII and the whole Ukraine conflict and everything is a direct result of Hasbro releasing MLP Gen 5 and discontinuing Gen 4 and Equestria Girls

Only Chris can see the apocalypse on the horizon and think; "but mah Pony show needs five more seasons!" fucking Christ if this is what a stay in a mental hospital did we need to bring back lobotomy and electroshock cause modern treatments do Jack shit on the dangerous retards.

 

[RodgerDodger]

I think Chris having a massive tantrum because he wasn't relased in time for his birthday like the script he'd written in his head said he should is a far simpler explanation than "Chris' Jesus Merge routine was making things difficult for his lawyer." Especially when you take into account evidence like the letters he had sent out to people insisting they recite the incantation he had written to get him out of jail. It's obvious being locked up in jail was beginning to negatively impact Chris' emotional/psychological state in a major way, so it really isn't a stretch to entertain the possibility that it finally came to a head and Chris threw a major tard tantrum.

And Chris always knew that what he did to Barb was wrong, even before the call got leaked and forwarded to the police. Chris was in communication with Null before his arrest and was bragging about his new girlfriend who was "and older woman". Chris knew that if he admitted he was shtupping his own geriatric mother that Null would be upset and would stop helping Chris fund his trip to the ponyfag convention. Even after Chris was arrested he continued to lie about everything, saying it was "soul bonding" to heal his mother and now telling people the leaked call was fake news and a faith test for his followers. Chris has known it was wrong and illegal the whole time. It certainly isn't just dawning on him now. The gravity of the situation maybe, but not the wrongness of it. He's been trying to weasel out of responsibility for his actions ever since he was forced to leave 14BC when the investigation first began.

Edit: I definitely agree with you that the staff at the psych facility knew that Chris was faking/not really crazy with his "Jesus bringing about the Toon Town Merge" delusions. It's their jobs to recognize genuine mental illness, and all of Chris' power fantasies have all been nothing but a coping mechanism for some Autistic loser to comfort himself with. But I'm also sure that they were better able to diagnose whatever else besides Autism is wrong with Chris that is the underlying contributor to his behavior and thought processes. He's not a Schizo or anything, but there's something more than simple Autism that's likely happening in Chris' head.

The Jail can't ship Chris or Anyone off to the Nut Hut for months. What we saw happen here almost certainly stems from a request from Heilberg. Which the Prosecution and Judge would have no issue granting. But I guarantee it was initiated from Heilberg. "Your Honor can we talk? I am having problems working with the defendant. He keeps eating the paperwork I give him and shoving my pens up his own ass! He claims it's part of the Merge, and that he is Jesus Chris(t) the Sonichu, whatever the fuck that is. Can we sane him up a bit maybe? Or failing that electrofuck the bullshit out of him?"

 

[ToroidalBoat]

hey @The Dude (can't directly quote post)

Chris is also a simpleton with the mind of a literal child who has found himself in Big Boy jail because he couldn't keep his adult urges in check

Like I said, the 3 biggest trolls in the Life of Fail are ego, stupidity, and bent duck. Remove one and CWC could still be free.

 

[Tykan]

Chris reminds me a little of Benjy from "The Sound and the Fury". He is just incapable of perceiving anything outside of the "Now". For those of you who have never read "The Sound and the Fury"; Benjy is the mentally retarded youngest son of the Compton family who cannot perceive any differences from the past or present and frequently perceives past events as happening in the now. Chris is incapable of perceiving anything outside of the "Now". Even when trolls were asking him about his future plans the guy had no real answer and could not visualize anything outside of his current life at 14 Branchland Ct. Chris has to read the CWCki to remember major events in his life and his comic which is just utterly insane to me that he has to read a wiki making fun of hm to remember his own life and comic.

Chris's life really is the tale of an idiot that signifies nothing.


End of the day you wish to think that your tax dollars are going to a good cause like repairing the roads. A man with clear mental delusions was forcibly committed to a state mental hospital for 2-3 months and at the end of the day he is still babbling his "I'm Jesus and me fucking my Mom was justified" rhetoric. If that is what your tax dollars were going towards wouldn't you be pissed that your hard earned money wasn't doing anything to cure a manchild's delusions even if the state was paying to fix it? Wouldn't you be angry that the government taking your money was ultimately a waste of time and effort.

I mean because who Chris is, to get all these delusions out of his head is just not feasible. I somewhat believe that he isn't delusions at all. It might be a case of security blanket paradox.
Either way I believe that he was sent to a psychiatric institution just to understand the full extent of his charges.

 

[King Metalia]

I think Chris having a massive tantrum because he wasn't released in time for his birthday like the script he'd written in his head said he should is a far simpler explanation than "Chris' Jesus Merge routine was making things difficult for his lawyer."

I couldn't agree more. I don't have the words to properly convey how much I would have loved to witness said tantrum.

 

[Ophelia]

I think a tantrum is feasible (looking back on things like the rage he threw when he got blocked by pony people on twitter), though it may have taken the form of a shutdown. Maybe both. Two months seems like a long time for him to be learning how to assist in his defense, but I don’t know what the typical length of time is.

Link

We know he took those at one time, but is it a continuing thing?

Say hello to the autistic LGBTQ overweight victim that also suffers from emotional thwauma and get's bullied, so he needs more safespace and cash he can spend on toys to cope with his fate.

Add him to the pile, I guess.

If he was under psychiatric care to determine if he was fit to stand trial,

He’s obviously fit to stand trial.

If a patient comes in with symptoms that are congruent with having a psychotic break or long-term mental illness such as schizophrenia like Chris' claiming to be God and pretending to see portals that aren't there, they're going to give them anti-psychotics. There's a good chance they have him something for anxiety as well.

They know the difference between actual delusions and coping fantasies. The key word is “pretending.” You don’t give antipsychotics to someone who is playing.

 

[Nasty Habits]

Thank god, I was worried the mental health facility might've actually fixed him. Good to hear he's still being good 'ol Chris!

 

[Lol4loko]

Hope we'll get some spicy details from Barbie-chan's life.

Also good god that signature is terrible

Says you. I can finally read his handwriting.

 

[Hopkinsville Goblin]

When Chris paid Mia Hamm $150 for sex, Barb was 70 years old. I have noticed older generations have a problem understanding inflation. Old people often think you can buy a nice house for $15,000 and pay for things like college and rent and a car with a part time job. During the last recession my own stepdad once asked me why I don't go out partying all the time and why I worked five days a week for only $31,000 a year. A lot of people were doing far worse than I was. He thought I should just get a job where I worked two days a week for $200,000 a year. He is and was unemployed and depends on my mom.

Also, Barb grew up poor, that's part of what likely lead to her hoarding tendencies.

I put the numbers into an inflation calculator, assuming Barb's value of money crystallized when she was 20 years old and Chris paid $150 in 2012. The adjusted value came out to $1,152. I can imagine Barb hearing $150 dollars for an hour and saying "For that kind of money even I would have sex with you!" For her, $150 is what a lot of people here likely pay for monthly rent. Chris, with the help of mental health professionals, has rationalized this into sexual consent.

 

[Clownery]

Thank god, I was worried the mental health facility might've actually fixed him. Good to hear he's still being good 'ol Chris!

i feel absolutely retarded for thinking he might have wised up.

 

[Ophelia]

I can imagine Barb hearing $150 dollars for an hour and saying "For that kind of money even I would have sex with you!"

I can see it, but I just wonder why Chris never said anything about it before. Occam says he’s just making it up.

i feel absolutely retarded for thinking he might have wised up.

Hope is a beautiful thing in a scummy messed up world.

 

[RainwaterDrop]

Thank god, I was worried the mental health facility might've actually fixed him. Good to hear he's still being good 'ol Chris!

Chris will be Chris until he dies. He was raised like this, spent decades being the World's Village Idiot and fucking none of that inspired him to change for the better. When he leaves the Jail, he will be the same narcissistic, delusional fucker he was before incarceration. Guy spent almost a year in jail, two months in mental care and is still the same he was before being jailed, if this didn't change Chris, fucking nothing will!

i feel absolutely retarded for thinking he might have wised up.

Don't feel bad for yourself, this is an unprecedent situation and pretty much everyone expected something would happen. At least him being medicated to shit and unable to rely on his coping mechanism of pretending to be Jesus and all the shit in CWCVille. Fuck, he looked the part, you could clearly think something was going on with his gloomy look at the latest mugshot, but fuckall happened!

Some people pointed this out, but the one thing that might have happened behind the scenes is him getting more and more desperate knowing this is real, that he fucked his own life over. That would explain the gloomy look, his sudden shift to blaming Barb and him leaning hard on his coping mechanism, harder than before to the point of blaming Sockness for the coof despite never mentioning this before in any other related contexts. Just see how much of a jumbled fucking mess his reasoning for blaming Barb is, no woman is impressed with the knowledge that you fucked a hooker, Barb was absurdly casual with this, which goes against her manipulative nature, she would slowly groom Chris into doing that if it was truly her idea. Chris is fucked, and he knows it!

 

[ToroidalBoat]

What a controlling bastard.

#BananasForBarb

(What is it with Chris and bananas for Barb anyway?)

 

[Son of Liberty]

#BananasForBarb

(What is it with Chris and bananas for Barb anyway?)

Simple. They are bent just like his duck.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Simple. They are bent just like his duck.

All those BS circumstances coming together to make the Life of Fail, with the bent duck like the cherry on top.

Chris didn't exactly get dealt a good hand to start with.

 

[Ultrapenguin]

I swear video evidence of Barb ravenously yanking Chris' pants off and pouncing on him with alacrity unbefitting a woman her age could surface and the naysayers would still try to hold on to their petty delusions of Chris being a perpetrator.

It all makes so much sense now. When Barb learned her little boy had done something as gritty and masculine as fucking a drug abusing hooker, she came (4 cwc) to see him as a real man with a real sex drive that's to be taken seriously. Perhaps she even justified it to herself as being to protect him; if he's going to have sex, why should it be with these dirty street walkers? He's too precious and naive, they'll take advantage of him, rob him, he could get an STD, who knows what could happen! She'd technically only be fulfilling her role as a mother by protecting Chris and addressing his (completely natural) urges. After all, he'd expressed interest in the past, and with him growing up and becoming the new man of the house...

Now realistically it was probably more out of a sense of possessiveness and a desire to control him and his attention fully, which is the kind of thing normally experienced by, like, your girlfriend or wife, but again, the boundaries here are clearly pretty ill defined.

I've held fast from the beginning no matter how much the mob tried to silence the truth; there was no rape. Barb was a major driving force in this event. She screwed Chris because she was knowingly, fully, organically, and without mitigating factor, thirsting for the bent duck. Chris needed only make the first move.

No Chris, I didn't say you have aspergers, I said you should "give me your a-sperm-ers". Austism? More like ooooohtism, am I right?

 

[TheLastJoestar]

I'd hoped the jail would have helped stop the letters but nope.

Problem is, after Chris accused Megan of conspiracy, he will never sound like anything other than a salty liar. Strange how that works isn't it? Maybe there's a bit of truth to the claim - Barb was really intimate with him, but even if she was, we'll never know if she tried to get him to sex her up (unless she admits it later), What I do know is this. If Jesus returned, it sure as hell wouldn't be from some guy who's mommy wants to sex him up.

 

[Apocalyptic Apopheniac]

After all, he'd expressed interest in the past, and with him growing up and becoming the new man of the house...

...

No Chris, I didn't say you have aspergers, I said you should "give me your a-sperm-ers". Austism? More like ooooohtism, am I right?

Organically? moarlike orgasmically amirite

Non-clusterBs have trouble following your reasoning because their social programming tells them the (biological) woman is always the victim in sex crimes and the more physically-imposing, testosterone-driven male is always the aggressor. It doesn't matter that she has repeatedly been labelled manipulative by those closest to her, or that she wields unfathomable control over a mind she has shaped from birth.

Chris doesn't need the threat of impending r@pe charges for him to be salty. In his mind (retconning aside) he was in a consensual relationship but he's the only one in trouble. His biblical understanding is that justice should be eye for eye, tooth for tooth, tit for tit. What's good for the (silly) goose is good for the gander.

i'm convinced mia hamm pt2 was barb.

I think you're onto something, especially in light of recent revelations. I'd even take it one step further and propose the sex dream wasn't a dream at all. He was spooning with her (often against his will) and boners have a mind of their own. He certainly had a lot to say in favor of motherfucking in its aftermath.

 

[Spangled Drongo]

Adding on, something I'm curious about, if hypothetically Chris was still in the troon saga and raped Barbara, what would his excuse be instead of this spiritual/Jesus bullshit?

But isn't he still a troon? He signs the letters with his female name and calls himself a goddess, and hasn't said anything about identifying as male again, so it's safe to assume the trans identity has just taken a backseat to make way for his newest delusion. And knowing Chris' poor track record when it comes to learning from his mistakes, detransition seems unlikely.