Mental Illness Thread

Goddamn, what sick fucks. I'm sorry you had to go through all that. I've been on the receiving end of numerous sexual assaults, but I've never actually been raped. D: But while I've never dealt with exactly the same trauma, one thing I do know is that while those nightmares may never go away, they do become less frequent with time (& intensive counseling). & I think the hardest thing is having to relive those memories over & over in therapy. Not even just in therapy---in everyday life. I can't even watch Law & Order anymore, because depictions of sex crimes or child abuse of any sort makes me flip my fucking shit. & certain situations just exacerbate these flashbacks. My dad was super abusive, & even after being away from him for years, shit my mom or siblings would do would send me into an episode.

Was the paralysis due to physical trauma, or something else, if you don't mind me asking?

I know how frustrating it can be to deal with mental illness, & trauma on top of that. I actually had to stop working & drop out of school because I would start experiencing anxiety-induced psychotic episodes. So you're not alone, trust me. But everything will be okay. Stay strong. Seek help, take your meds (if applicable), & keep doing what you're doing. You've managed to make it this far already! It takes amazing strength & courage to deal with what you've gone through, & to tell your story as well! You can only keep getting better. No one can control you---they will only if you let them. You're in charge of your life. Take it back, one step at a time. Everyone else can go fuck off or choke on a dick. :left:

Hang in there! You've got DING DANG DIRTY TROLLS in your corner, rooting for you! :heart-full:

Sorry for quoting the whole message, I have no idea how to make it quote what I want.

But thank you, I know what you mean about TV, I actually don't watch it anymore because everything seems to have abuse in it of some kind. The question about the paralysis, was due to the physical trauma, my therapist said that it was my minds way of getting me to actually deal with things, kind of like a mini breakdown he called it.

I'm sorry to hear about you, and I hope you get better too. I hope everything is okay with you.

Also thank you everybody for your support, even if you are all Dang Dirty Trolls. It's been nice to get things off my chest. :D
 
Sorry for quoting the whole message, I have no idea how to make it quote what I want.

But thank you, I know what you mean about TV, I actually don't watch it anymore because everything seems to have abuse in it of some kind. The question about the paralysis, was due to the physical trauma, my therapist said that it was my minds way of getting me to actually deal with things, kind of like a mini breakdown he called it.

I'm sorry to hear about you, and I hope you get better too. I hope everything is okay with you.

Also thank you everybody for your support, even if you are all Dang Dirty Trolls. It's been nice to get things off my chest. :biggrin:

OH, okay, I know what you're talking about. I think that's called "sleep paralysis?" I think? & that sounds about right---it's pretty weird how mental disorders start manifesting themselves in physical symptoms (e.g., anxiety attacks, body aches associated with depression, etc.).

I'm doing better, though. I hope you are, too. <3
 
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I know these will never fully go away, but I am working on controlling them.

Again I am sorry if this has upset anybody.

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Wow, reading about all that you guys went through, I'm glad that I don't have any serious mental illnesses, other than having low self-esteem and being very socially awkward.

Just know that even with all the frustations and troubles your mental problems might give you, and make things difficult or even impossible, just know that there will be many things in live that can make you happy and that you should strive to have these things the best ways you can.
 
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While I've never been officialy diagnosed, I strongly believe I have SAD. No two therapists can agree on where I belong on the autistic spectrum, if at all. And I've been suicidal ever since an especialy bad job interview in Spring of '10.

But other than that I'm right as rain. :)
 
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i have GAD and i've dealt with depression my whole life, nothing too interesting, everyone has those. my depression is under control and i haven't gone into a depressive episode in over a year. the anxiety thing is at an all time high, though. pretty sure i'm developing panic disorder/agoraphobia, which is freaking me out considerably. panic attacks are my biggest fear, and they always happen when i'm outside of the house. nothing worse than having a panic attack out of nowhere when you're in the middle of class and have to excuse yourself to throw up @_@
 
While I've never been officialy dianosed, I strongly believe I have SAD. No two therapists can agree on where I belong on the autistic spectrum, if at all. And I've been suicidal ever since an especialy bad job interview in Spring of '10.

But other than that I'm right as rain. :)

I'm sorry. D: How have you been holding up recently?

i have GAD and i've dealt with depression my whole life, nothing too interesting, everyone has those. my depression is under control and i haven't gone into a depressive episode in over a year. the anxiety thing is at an all time high, though. pretty sure i'm developing panic disorder/agoraphobia, which is freaking me out considerably. panic attacks are my biggest fear, and they always happen when i'm outside of the house. nothing worse than having a panic attack out of nowhere when you're in the middle of class and have to excuse yourself to throw up @_@

Panic attacks are the worst. I'm not even agoraphobic, & I get uneasy when there's too many people around, so I can only imagine what you go through. Have you been prescribed anything to take the edge off?
 
I've mentioned elsewhere that I'm Aspergian. I also have chronic depression and anxiety and (not technically diagnosed but possible) agoraphobia.
 
Panic attacks are the worst. I'm not even agoraphobic, & I get uneasy when there's too many people around, so I can only imagine what you go through. Have you been prescribed anything to take the edge off?
i used to take lorazepam sometimes for the GAD years ago, but i lost my parents' insurance when i graduated high school so i haven't been able to get any more. it's for the better anyway, i think. lorazepam helps a lot but it's a scary drug since it's super addictive and withdrawal symptoms are awful. i've figured out how to deal with the anxiety unmedicated (working out, breathing exercises and lots of chamomile tea), but it's the panic thing that i'm having trouble with, especially when they come on when i'm in a place where i can't go somewhere quiet to take a few deep breaths and cry it out. i'm supposed to be getting healthcare sometime within the next few months (thanks obama :)) so i can get properly medicated and in therapy or whatever.

also, hey, question to you asperger's people - is there some symptom that made your doctors come to the conclusion that you had it? doctors toyed with the idea of me having asperger's when i was younger, since i had (and still have) a lot of the symptoms (trouble with eye contact, sensory issues, speech trouble, social awkwardness) but in the end i guess i don't fit the mold entirely. i don't want to have it, but i'm just curious what makes doctors figure out that you have it.
 
also, hey, question to you asperger's people - is there some symptom that made your doctors come to the conclusion that you had it? doctors toyed with the idea of me having asperger's when i was younger, since i had (and still have) a lot of the symptoms (trouble with eye contact, sensory issues, speech trouble, social awkwardness) but in the end i guess i don't fit the mold entirely. i don't want to have it, but i'm just curious what makes doctors figure out that you have it.

I was diagnosed relatively young so I don't recall whether there was one symptom in particular. Probably my near-total disinterest in social activity.
 
I'm diagnosed with schizophrenia. it started when I was in the military and got worse when I was discharged. for 5 years I was unstable I kept going in and out of the VA hospital before I finally got it under control. I was disorganized, paranoid and from time to time I would have visual and audio hallucinations. the worse part of the disease wasn't the disease itself but it was the fact I was alone during those 5 years I shut out the outside world including my family. I wasn't taking good care of myself and to this day there is still things I saw in my life that I'm still not sure if there real or not. my social skills are shit now because I don't have much interaction with people but I'm working on it. 1 year ago was the last time I had to be hospitalized but I have been getting better since because I'm on the right medication and therapy. Even though the worst of it is over there is still parts of the illness that hasn't gone away I've lost interest in a lot of my hobbies and been left with depression. But on the bright side I'm much better then last year and still working on improving my life such as college and therapy.
 
I was diagnosed with a mental disorder when I was really young and I didn't actually know about it until I was an adult.

I don't take much stock in the diagnosis since I'm fairly neurotypical and don't get depressed all that often. I'm assuming it was either a misdiagnosis or I grew out of it, but whenever I googled it after the fact most of the articles read "You do not grow out of it" so it's pretty confusing in general.

I also don't believe in simply slapping mental disorders onto people if they're just different in some way. Like a person isn't necessarily autistic or something when they're really young just because they're shy or they like doing things in specific patterns.
 
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Back in 2000, I was diagnosed as a child with HFA (though Asperger's is a more accurate description), with tests in 2001 confirming it. I used to be in an IEP program throughout my time in school, but as I went on through high school, I started relying less and less on it, to where I barely needed help in all of my classes (except for math).

I've always known I had autism, but I never really made a fuss about it. Nobody would know that I have it unless I told them myself (or if someone in my family did).
 
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I've got GAD, it's fairly mild & I cope. So I consider myself lucky. :)
 
I've suffered through depression pretty much my whole life, but it really manifested itself this year in terms of self harm and suicidal thoughts. I was lucky enough to get into therapy, and was sent to a psychiatric hospital after the suicidal thoughts reached a very high point. By then I'd been cutting daily, usually 20 plus times a day with a razor blade. They weren't deep, mostly surface stuff, but it was the only thing helping me cope besides music and writing.

I was put on meds and stayed roughly 2 1/2 days before being released. Since then I've been on meds and have slowly been taking steps to piece everything together. It sounds dramatic, but it's going pretty good so far. The last time I cut was last Friday, but only because I had gotten some pretty bad news and wasn't sure how to cope.

It's weird because until this year I never self harmed. I have no idea what triggered it. Maybe curiosity, or wanting to hurt the person who I was blaming for my situation (though in reality, I wasn't helping myself and could be the only one blamed, even though this person is awful company). Having a best friend to help me and a therapist to talk to, as well as my family taking my mental health seriously, helped me a lot. Otherwise I don't think I'd be here.
 
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I've suffered through depression pretty much my whole life, but it really manifested itself this year in terms of self harm and suicidal thoughts. I was lucky enough to get into therapy, and was sent to a psychiatric hospital after the suicidal thoughts reached a very high point. By then I'd been cutting daily, usually 20 plus times a day with a razor blade. They weren't deep, mostly surface stuff, but it was the only thing helping me cope besides music and writing.

I was put on meds and stayed roughly 2 1/2 days before being released. Since then I've been on meds and have slowly been taking steps to piece everything together. It sounds dramatic, but it's going pretty good so far. The last time I cut was last Friday, but only because I had gotten some pretty bad news and wasn't sure how to cope.

It's weird because until this year I never self harmed. I have no idea what triggered it. Maybe curiosity, or wanting to hurt the person who I was blaming for my situation (though in reality, I wasn't helping myself and could be the only one blamed, even though this person is awful company). Having a best friend to help me and a therapist to talk to, as well as my family taking my mental health seriously, helped me a lot. Otherwise I don't think I'd be here.

I'm really sorry to hear that you've been struggling with those problems and i'm glad you're getting help.
 
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silentprincess, that's a rough story. I respect you for surviving and carrying on. The best thing you can do to all those that have hurt you is to rise up and be better than them. Be more successful, kinder to others, and a better person than they could ever hope to be.

I have this view that too many people are on meds for "chemical imbalances." To me it's a positive-feedback system. I've read studies that show certain meds can alter brain chemistry. I've also read studies that show circumstances and attitude can alter brain chemistry. I have a friend who insists he can't do anything with Adderall because he can't pay attention for more than 5 minutes without it.... only he got it prescribed after he graduated (with honors) with a masters degree.

If the drugs help you then that's great, but I hope that the people who are on them at least consider lifestyle changes that could possibly have just as much benefit. I think a lot of psychiatrists prescribe drugs because it's easier than listening to every patient talk in detail about how their closet contains a portal to a town where they are the mayor and sonic recolors run around.

So that said, here is my story. When I was 15 I got expelled from high school. Hilarious! I spent a year moping around watching tv and playing vidya and my dad got me to go to a technical college. I graduated from that college at age 18 with an AS degree. I didn't really consider it a challenging environment and for the most part I just watched tv and played vidya. I saw adulthood approaching and my father said I had to get a job to continue living at home. I was so unmotivated and depressed because I had no friends and girls hated me. One day I decided that I was sick of sitting around doing nothing and so I started looking for work. I never looked back. I don't know what did it. I just decided I had had enough. I suspect that's got to be a part of it. Of course, this is a story I typically share with people who are "stuck in a rut" which can be a symptom of depression or a cause.
 
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