Shieeeet, this is gonna sound autistic but I found out his life story from watching him play sonic for 7 hours.
Burger was born in a military household and he was forced to move around a lot. His mother said fuck it and decided to home school him. Burger moved around and never made any friends in any of the places he lived in, because of the homeschooling and how his parents coddled him.When he was 16, Burger had an autistic meltdown when his parents told him to order Mcdonalds for them (no that isn't a joke). He was so socially inept because of the years of isolation that he couldn't even order some fuckin' nuggies without shitting his pants. His parents then decided that he needed to go to school to learn how to socialize.
He went to school for the first time when he was 16. He had his first crush ever on an actual bull dyke. He had no idea how to express his feelings for girls that he was attracted to, so he would just act very weird towards them and ask them out repeatedly. The dyke relented and said yes to a date, young Brandon was so exited for his date but when he showed up, that fucking bitch brought her friends with her. He was so devastated that he sat in the corner of the theater away from the group.
He had a bunch of other failed relationships but one that sticks out is where some fat bitch used Brandon to pass her exams. This fat whore would abuse him and make him do her homework for her so she would pass her classes. Brandon has a massive inferiority complex, so he thought that this land whale was the best he was ever going to get. Eventually Brandon lost his virginity to this "woman". After he fucked her she went to the bathroom, grabbed two razor blades and told Brandon that he needs to cut himself. He wasn't having any of that shit so she started cutting herself and tried to cut Burger with the blade as well. He tried to wrestle the blades out of her hands but her obese exceptional individual strength was too much for his weak 5 '5" body. Eventually he socked her right in the fucking jaw.
After this the hamplanet sent a video to Brandon of her killing herself. This put a massive cloud of guilt over his head. All the while, Burger was drinking heavily and his habits were getting worse as his stress and depression grew.
Burger's number one fear is being cheated on, he fears it more than anything else because it enforces his inferiority complex. This is why he wanted to hang himself after the hamplanet told Brandon that the suicide was faked and she fucked a bunch of guys after the fake suicide meme. Eventually Burger moved on and fell into a great relationship with some hot chick. Eventually she ghosted him though because of his problems. Burger turned into an angry, woman hating incel after this.
Burger met Mumkey around late 2016, they quickly became best friends. Mumkey tried his hardest to fix Assburger, to get him sober and to stop him from being such a fag. With Mumkey and Burger living in different states, this was very difficult. They could only communicate through the internet. Mumkey convinced Assburger to move out of his parent's house in Florida and move to NC with Mumkey. Burger did just that a few months ago.
Mumkey and Burger would work on videos together all while Mumkey was trying to help out Assburger with his drinking problem. Assburger moved into an apartment with a bunch of meth heads, he paid for a few months rent in advance, this ended up being around $2000. The meth heads never paid their portion of the rent so Burger was evicted from his apartment and the druggies pocketed the money. He was in the process of suing them until he got v&.
While Assburger was living in NC, Mumkey hooked him up with his big tiddy goth GF named Jackie. They would develop a long distance relationship and they bonded over their fucked up pasts, they also bonded over Jackie being a former alcoholic, Jackie, along with Mumkey were trying to help Burger through his alcohol problem. After Burger was evicted, he decided to move in with his new GF. This is where he did that weird cooking livestream.
Eventually Burger relapsed and the rest is history.
Reading over this, I can't help but feel sorry for Assburger. He is a huge fag but he is kind of a product of his childhood. Isolation really fucks people up.
