NeoGAF & ResetERA - The Hilarious N̶e̶v̶e̶r̶e̶n̶d̶i̶n̶g̶ Splintering "Gaming" Forum Circus

[kcbbq]

Squenix couldn't give a shit less about dangerhairs or even their own fans.

Have you seen their visible fans? I don't blame them. They're the worst kind of fan. The more they ignore that shit the better, imo.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

Dunkey has unironically the best video for detangling the storyline between Kingdom Hearts games' continuity:

Handwriting is far more telling than the thousand-year stares and soy smiles this thing gives off. You're looking at a person who's barely holding themselves together; multiple unclosed spaces like the P blown open wider than their prolapsed asshole, artificial & forced optimism to the point that it's horseshoeing around to depression with the unnatural upward strokes on what should be horizontal lines, massive inconsistencies between stroke layout/design of the same letter in the same statement(K, A, R, O's) showing a fractured personality ready to blow, asymmetry in the heart and most letters... The writer of this handwriting sample is an absolute mess internally.

While your analysis is entertaining, handwriting analysis is faker than phrenology. It's good for determining if something was genuinely written by the person who it claims to be, but that's about it.

Sorry if your career is based on fake science, hopefully it's just an interest of yours.

 

[Haramburger]

hopefully it's just an interest of yours.

Just an interest. It can be faked and manipulated, but basically nobody does in this paperless society.

 

[Munchingonfish]

http://archive.is/plWh0

 

[Oh Shit I'm Sorry]

ERA is up in arms because the new AssCreed DLC has the main character fug someone of the opposite sex leading to childbirth which ruins their roleplaying as a gay man/woman in Ancient Greece.

The problem here is that AssCreed is and has always been a game series in which a future person uses a magic machine to experience the lives of their assassin ancestors so they can learn their l33t skillz and become assassins in present day. The key word here is 'ancestors'. From the very start it was already canon that the player character (be they male or female) would breed at some point because unfortunately neither sperm banks or adoption agencies were very common in 431 BCE.

But hey why let established canon get in the way of your outrage?

 

[AnOminous]

Maybe next time don't try and roleplay in a game series with trash writing and then get shocked when said trash writing ruins your immersion.

From the tantrum you'd think the game had asked whether you were LGBT and if you were, it called you a fag and deleted itself.

 

[Incredible Crisis]

View attachment 640227

ERA is up in arms because the new AssCreed DLC has the main character fug someone of the opposite sex leading to childbirth which ruins their roleplaying as a gay man/woman in Ancient Greece.

The problem here is that AssCreed is and has always been a game series in which a future person uses a magic machine to experience the lives of their assassin ancestors so they can learn their l33t skillz and become assassins in present day. The key word here is 'ancestors'. From the very start it was already canon that the player character (be they male or female) would breed at some point because unfortunately neither sperm banks or adoption agencies were very common in 431 BCE.

But hey why let established canon get in the way of your outrage?

Apparently they handwaved that requirement as of the latest games, as you're not even playing as an Animus user related to the player character at all.

It's funny that they fell into this situation because they pissed off the folks who can't possibly conceive of having children in virtual or real life, for any reason.

 

[Sissy Galvez]

View attachment 640227

ERA is up in arms because the new AssCreed DLC has the main character fug someone of the opposite sex leading to childbirth which ruins their roleplaying as a gay man/woman in Ancient Greece.

The problem here is that AssCreed is and has always been a game series in which a future person uses a magic machine to experience the lives of their assassin ancestors so they can learn their l33t skillz and become assassins in present day. The key word here is 'ancestors'. From the very start it was already canon that the player character (be they male or female) would breed at some point because unfortunately neither sperm banks or adoption agencies were very common in 431 BCE.

But hey why let established canon get in the way of your outrage?

Reeeeeee 99% of society is heterosexual reeeeeeeee.

It’s also a video game so get over it. Isn’t that what the lgbt waaahhmbulance says when lgbt shit is shoved into a game for no reason?

 

[CrunkLord420]

Ubisoft should have never caved to the demands of multiple main characters. It creates a significant amount of additional work (that cannibalize other efforts), and you still end up with rough edges where you try to share cutscenes and main story beats between characters. Ubisoft likely only allowed for gay relationships because it's objectively easier to be gender agnostic on the development side, and fears of REEEE from journos.

ResetEra got exactly what they asked for, then gets mad about the ludonarrative dissonance of their demands.

 

[AirdropShitposts]

As a condition for voicing Hades originally James Woods demanded that it be included in his contract that all future uses of the character use his voice. If Reeeeesetera had their way Square Enix would have to cut the Hercules stage entirely.

He's also stated if he hadn't, he'd still do the character for basically free because of how much he loves it. (That's why he even did it for the TV series when they didn't even bother to approach many of the voice actors assuming it would cost too much. And Woods was like "we'll make it work out." IMDB says he was in half the episodes.) Disney and Square aren't going to turn down a big name like that, or drop the character, simply because he shitposts on Twitter.

IIRC, Woods said something similar about his many Family Guy appearances. And even the liberals who run the show loved working with him because he was completely fine with them making the "James Woods" on the show totally insane. (Seth MacFarlane once defended having Rush Limbaugh, of all people, do the show multiple times on some podcast with a similar explanation, "he was a great sport, worked hard, friendly to everybody and fine with us making fun of him" while noting more politically aligned types like Michael Moore wouldn't even return their calls.)

People on Era can't even fathom this kind of shit, with their own family members, let alone working with someone briefly to do something "bigger than politics" for the fans.

 

[Judge Dredd]

That shirt must be standard issue for reset era staff.

View attachment 640227

ERA is up in arms because the new AssCreed DLC has the main character fug someone of the opposite sex leading to childbirth which ruins their roleplaying as a gay man/woman in Ancient Greece.

The problem here is that AssCreed is and has always been a game series in which a future person uses a magic machine to experience the lives of their assassin ancestors so they can learn their l33t skillz and become assassins in present day. The key word here is 'ancestors'. From the very start it was already canon that the player character (be they male or female) would breed at some point because unfortunately neither sperm banks or adoption agencies were very common in 431 BCE.

But hey why let established canon get in the way of your outrage?

They are now experiencing the flip side of their own ideology. They said it was okay to have a female Dr Who, female Ghostbusters, black James Bond, black Spiderman etc. it was okay to smash series canon to get what they want. They were even okay with historical revisionism in Assassins Creed if it meant more representation. But now suddenly it's sacrosanct and changing a gay character to be bi/straight is now the worst thing ever.

The question is, which justification to throw back in their faces. "It's not for you" is my favourite, but "Why do you hate straight people" might be a better fit. I just hope the mods crack down on all those racist hetrophobes that make ResetEra unsafe.

 

[Corbin Dallas Multipass]

These people realize without heterosexual intercourse there would be no humans right? Like, yeah, gay people can adopt and donate sperm and what have you, but you need sperm + egg (which are produced by males and females, respectively(which are also known as men and women respectively)) to make a new human. You don't need to be straight, of course, but you do need to do something resembling hetero sex, at least the end of it.

 

[AF 802]

View attachment 640206
http://archive.li/plWh0

Triggered by a phrase even the most non-religious say because it's polite after a sneeze? I don't even think it's that much of a religious phrase, but 'muh homophobia' I guess.

Guess you could just pull a Jerry and say "you're so good looking":

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

Kind of assumed he died years ago tbh.

He's on Twitter pretty much 24/7. People I follow like to retweet him retweeting Fox News and pictures of gas prices for some odd reason.

 

[BubbleButt]

Triggered by a phrase even the most non-religious say because it's polite after a sneeze? I don't even think it's that much of a religious phrase, but 'muh homophobia' I guess.

Guess you could just pull a Jerry and say "you're so good looking"

Reminds me of that old Dane Cook bit

 

[moocow]

From the tantrum you'd think the game had asked whether you were LGBT and if you were, it called you a fag and deleted itself.

I'd pay full price for a game like that just to support a developer with that kind of brass balls.

 

[Night Owl]

View attachment 640227

ERA is up in arms because the new AssCreed DLC has the main character fug someone of the opposite sex leading to childbirth which ruins their roleplaying as a gay man/woman in Ancient Greece.

The problem here is that AssCreed is and has always been a game series in which a future person uses a magic machine to experience the lives of their assassin ancestors so they can learn their l33t skillz and become assassins in present day. The key word here is 'ancestors'. From the very start it was already canon that the player character (be they male or female) would breed at some point because unfortunately neither sperm banks or adoption agencies were very common in 431 BCE.

But hey why let established canon get in the way of your outrage?

I remember a time when AC games were about killing people and not a LGBT dating simulator.

 

[JuanLee]

These people realize without heterosexual intercourse there would be no humans right? Like, yeah, gay people can adopt and donate sperm and what have you, but you need sperm + egg (which are produced by males and females, respectively(which are also known as men and women respectively)) to make a new human. You don't need to be straight, of course, but you do need to do something resembling hetero sex, at least the end of it.

They don't care. Troon 'feels' supercede everything, including the continuation of the human race.

As has been said plenty of times before, it's useless trying to satiate these cunts. No matter what you do it's never ever enough. I've given up on PS4 gaming because it's just a hive of woke bellendery. Thank god Nintendo haven't been diddled by these wankers yet and still do pretty much whatever they want.

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

View attachment 640227

These fucking reeeeing narcissists. Hurr durr lgbtxyz people want to be represented and the dlc is homophobic!11"

Hell no. Fuck representation. Not every character has to be a video game version of you nor have the traits you think are important.

(this goes for everyone who complains that character xyz isn't black, male, female, gay, fat, autistic, big titted etc.)

 

[Oh Shit I'm Sorry]

When I saw the character I self-inserted as give birth it was like I was being raped in real life!