Official Space Station 13 Server

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Back in the glory days of /tg/ before they became a looney bin, I played a character called Barackus Obamus.
A lizard who constantly claimed he was going to become the next president.

>get spawned in as a traitor lawyer.
>wanted to try a very RPish gimmick
>idea
>get a chameleon kit and give myself the changeling skinsuit and head.
>equip it and walk to security
>"HELLO FELLOW HUMANSSS, BE SSSURE TO VOTE FOR ME NEXT ELECTION."
>Sec knows this is antag shit but digs the gimmick
>The CMO screams over comms that im obviously a traitor out for their blood.
>HOS told the CMO to cool it with this bullshit or he'd get him in a straight jacket for this conspiracy bullshit.
>Ask for all access at the HoP for my presidential campaign.
>Copy papers promoting my campaign and hang them all over the station
>get some space drugs and a sleepy pen
>fill sleepy pen with space drugs
>stab people with the pen and hypnoflash them to create "voters"
Easily.
>Do my objectives on the side, just basic steal handtele.
>CMO tried to kill me with a syringe gun but he soon got arrested and killed by my voters who broke into brig.
>escape on the shuttle
 
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There was this time my now good friend Nelson Mandingo was working as a chemist and two shitters started beating him up. It probably was Brenton Tarrant/Jesus Alekseev/Chet Masteron. The thing is, one of them was running around with a fire axe just smashing windows, in full captain gear (he was listed as an assistant), and when he arrived to medbay he decided to give me AA for no reason, probably thinking I was going to join the raid. So then the other shitter goes and stabs my nigger, leaving him close to death, when I patch him up. Nelson said he was going to get revenge, so he asked for my help. I gave him the syringe gun, but I realized that against these two we were going to need something stronger. So I have a brilliant idea: let's raid armory and get ready for when things go south.

We arrive there, and a security borg decides to join us. He probably started following because he was curious, two medical dudes just walking to security like if it was nothing, and we explain to him the situation. We enter, and turns out the faggot has locked himself in the armory, we caught him gearing up. The borg tries to open, but the laser gun of the shitter gets him. Mandingo and I keep trying to break in, while hiding and ocassionally patching our wounds, when the shitter decides it's time to stop hiding and opens up, throws a flash grenade and we're now blinded. I manage to get into maintenece, looking for something else to help me. I usually carry the surgical drill, it's rarely used in actual surgeries, I just have it in hand because it's my weapon of choice whenever a lunatic tries to attack medbay. But I knew the drill wasn't going to do the job, this guy was fully gunned and ready to anihilate us. While I'm trying to find any other weapon, I stumble upon that security recreation room, and there's a damn revolver just laying around. I pick it up and run back to my friend, which I fear he might be dead by now.

Mandingo, that fucking bastard, managed to hit him with the syringe and whatever chemical it had inside (I think it was something sleepy) was starting to make effect. The shitter runs back dazzled, and decides to shoot us from there. Mandingo is in critical, I can tell with my medical HUD, when I start firing the revolver. Gun runs out of ammo, so it's time to go melee and attack him with the drill directly to his eyes. I start punching but the lasers get me, and things turn dark. Fuck, but I guess I knew we were not gonna make it.

Or so I thought. You see, that Mandingo nigger somehow had the strength to pick himself up. When my vision clears a bit, I see him walking towards us and turns out the shitter is dying on the floor too. He tries to pick up his gun but none of us can use our arms. So Mandingo gets close and I tell him to shoot the faggot, but he can barely stand up. I say, check my backpack, there's a medkit. And that's what he does. He starts healing his wounds. I run out of air and start dying, and I actually die, but it seems like the shitter is not in critical anymore. So the both cripples try to grab the gun, and Mandingo manages to pick it up faster, starts shooting at him and the bastard dies. Some guys (syndie or something I think) break in security too and Mandingo instructs them to take me back to medbay. We had a small crowd in the deadchat looking at our slapfight and they were cheering for us. I don't know what Mandingo did to the body, he probably removed the head, or ate it or something, but for the rest of the round we felt like we were the most badass motherfuckers.
 
Organs damaged? Inject regenerative drug cocktail from chem.
Chem can only make drugs to heal brain, eye and ear damage. Liver and lungs need reagents from botany.

The biggest problem here is the patient would need to be alive and out of stasis for any drugs to metabolise, which means broken hearts and lungs would still need to be replaced or repaired surgically to prevent them from immediately dying after defib, and if you're going to swap them out you might as well do the liver too while you've got the chest cavity open.

As a chemist it's easy enough to make oculine, inacusiate and inform medical staff to throw retards into a mannitol cryo and to treat eyes and ears chemically, but in practise that means doctors running back and forward from chem and having a bunch of confused patients crowding up exam because they can't explain to deaf blind retards that they're tick healing and don't need any more surgery.
 
Does anyone actually enjoy the new medical? like you get beat up bad, put on a stasis bed and then the medics give up on fixing you because you're too bruised and after ignoring you for about fifteen minutes then unplug you and throw some ligger on the bed. The setting for space station thirteen is literally in the far future, I refuse to believe that in the far future chemists can't make drugs that don't hurt your liver and that cloning pods are too far fetched.
Organs decay way too quick. You leave a person on the ground and in a minute or two their heart is beyond repair. We usually only have four stasis beds on medbay, I sometimes try to build more but it's time consuming because you have to go to science (I have no idea why medics don't have access to science) and beg (or break in) for a capacitor and a micro manipulator. Not to mention all the cables required, and that cryo research is sometimes ignored unless you're keeping an eye on the queue. Add that to the fact that whenever medbay gets full of bodies people think they can just walk in for no reason and start shitting up stuff. They steal materials, break things, and I've even had fuckers that remove the person I was performing surgery to just to place the one they want me to heal. Also, a lot of people just drag the bodies of their friends in crit, with open wounds, and start crying for us to help them when they could be carried/given CPR to stabilize and thrown into cryo. Even if one of us is making sure everyone of these people makes it to cryo, more than often dragging their bodies loosing blood and killing them, and so when you finally get to perform surgery the organs are rotting again. Most deaths are avoidable like this, and those that are not are the ones that got really fucked up and their surgeries can take a while.

In conclusion: stay out of medbay if you are healthy. Also don't come cry to us for the cure for your coof, that's what chemistry is for. And if you got radiation, for the love of God, don't run around like a retard irradiating everybody.
 
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Organs decay way too quick. You leave a person on the ground and in a minute or two their heart is beyond repair. We usually only have four stasis beds on medbay, I sometimes try to build more but it's time consuming because you have to go to science (I have no idea why medics don't have access to science) and beg (or break in) for a capacitor and a micro manipulator. Not to mention all the cables required, and that cryo research is sometimes ignored unless you're keeping an eye on the queue. Add that to the fact that whenever medbay gets full of bodies people think they can just walk in for no reason and start shitting up stuff. They steal materials, break things, and I've even had fuckers that remove the person I was performing surgery to just to place the one they want me to heal. Also, a lot of people just drag the bodies of their friends in crit, with open wounds, and start crying for us to help them when they could be carried/given CPR to stabilize and thrown into cryo. Even if one of us is making sure everyone of these people makes it to cryo, more than often dragging their bodies loosing blood and killing them, and so when you finally get to perform surgery the organs are rotting again. Most deaths are avoidable like this, and those that are not are the ones that got really fucked up and their surgeries can take a while.

In conclusion: stay out of medbay if you are healthy. Also don't come cry to us for the cure for your coof, that's what chemistry is for. And if you got radiation, for the love of God, don't run around like a retard irradiating everybody.
Also 90% of the stations bombs go off there.
 
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Chem can only make drugs to heal brain, eye and ear damage. Liver and lungs need reagents from botany.

The biggest problem here is the patient would need to be alive and out of stasis for any drugs to metabolise, which means broken hearts and lungs would still need to be replaced or repaired surgically to prevent them from immediately dying after defib, and if you're going to swap them out you might as well do the liver too while you've got the chest cavity open.

As a chemist it's easy enough to make oculine, inacusiate and inform medical staff to throw retards into a mannitol cryo and to treat eyes and ears chemically, but in practise that means doctors running back and forward from chem and having a bunch of confused patients crowding up exam because they can't explain to deaf blind retards that they're tick healing and don't need any more surgery.
That's why I think there should be changes to accomodate a better flow through the chart, and to at least attempt to give chem autists a reason to make beneficial stuff instead of vile concoctions to drug medbay and bombs to blow themselves up with. My suggestion earlier of Strange Reagent for viro is also one that might alleviate the pressure, because Strange Reagent is coded to fix damaged bodies as it revives people so if the viro can make limited quantities for doing his job it would give an "oh shit!" buffer for surges on medbay.

And on an ideal station there should be ways to fall back on other departments as a release valve for the excess. So with botany changes reverted and pod cloning more easily available, if chem isn't making the goop to slather on spacemen who need revival surgery you can go to botany and get them to do it as a last resort. Or, if you're feeling lucky, do it yourself in the public garden since cabbage seeds are easy to get.
 
Can you please fix the bug that doesn't allow health analyzers to read chemical contents? It's really annoying, because we use it a lot at medbay, and we basically have to guess what's going on now.
 
Can you please fix the bug that doesn't allow health analyzers to read chemical contents? It's really annoying, because we use it a lot at medbay, and we basically have to guess what's going on now.
Does the medical pda have a reagent scanner?
 
I just use my PDA to send messages, so you're asking the wrong guy. But I don't think so, because that would probably make the health analyzer useless.
Most job PDAs have something useful they do. I'm fairly sure the medical PDA has a reagent scanner, if you click on a beaker or whatever with your PDA it will tell you the reagents. I use my atmos tech PDA all the time for analyzing pipes.
 
meh, why not.
I'm not really good at making things happen but I have some mildly """funny""" stories

>be me
>rogue virologist
>learned something from the man who kept releasing super AIDS every round
>run into the kitchen, steal all the milk and start working on my magnum opus
>finally, it is done
>inject it into a monkey
>or try, at least
>monkey tackles me, steals my virus syringe and injects me
>beat it to death with my bare hands
>Welp, might aswell go out and spread it since the cure is basically unattainable
>walk out of virology
>get murdered instantly by two golems


I get what I deserve.

>be me
>Too intimidated by medicine to become a doctor
>become a paramedic instead
>decide to go do some bounties for cargo while I still can
>Centcom wants some lungs
>eh, easy enough
>get some lungs from the chef
>no idea where he got three of them
>get my bounty sorted and go back to medbay
>while I get my equipment ready some random chef comes in
>his appendix is about to explode
>welp, guess I'll do the surgery
>start sawing the chef's chest
>sheeit
<Are-a you a real doctor
>no
>eventually figure it out
>I'm a big boy now
>decide to actually start doing my job and go look for people
>get gunned down the moment I step out of medbay

>be me
>antag engi with a HoP blood bro
>have to kill some assistant and steal the station blueprints
>okay, easy enough
>HoP comes in to check on us right at the start of the round
>okay?
>later on he gives me AA
>nice
>do my job, set up solars, fry a moth in the permabrig by opening up a hole in the windows which caused the moth to get sucked into electrocuted mesh
>meh, who cares
>set up the solars, dick around for a bit, remember that I need those prints
>go into engi, wait a bit and then steal the CE's locker
>drag it into maint and bust it open
>where are the blueprints?!?!
>Oh right, CE probably has them
<[Engineering]Hey, I found your locker in the maintenance, CE
<[Engineering]Hmmm, I wonder why it's there
>aw sheeit, they're getting suspicious, better kill CE before he figures it out
>go looking for CE
>he's setting up the turbine
>perfect chance
>go into the turbine room and there's a CE and some random engi
>shoot the shit for a while, engi gets hungry and leaves us alone
>talk some more with CE
<Me: Man, speaking of food, I'm also getting kind of hungry
<CE: Same, wanna get some pizza?
>CE starts walking towards the door
<Me: Oh I'm not hungry for pizza
>hack CE in the head with the hatchet
<CE, into the radio: I'm dying
>Job done, now where are tho-
>the engi from earlier walks in
>Aw sheeeit
>have a long-ass duel in atmos, I almost get burned to a crisp
>fuck, that nigger robusted me good
>take his body, take it into the turbine room and shove it into a locker
>search CE
>no blueprints
>what?!
>whatever, shove CE into another locker and get the fuck out of there
>get patched up in medbay, tell them that I saw [my target's name] robust some engi and the CE
>okay, that should do the trick
>dick around some more, get shot by some nigger and end up back in medbay, almost dead
>while I'm getting patched up, guess who walks in
>that's right, it's the fucking CE
<You were slick, kiddo, real slick
>then he walks away
>nigga what?
>I get patched up, board the shuttle and survive
>As it turns out, my blood brother just walked in and took the blueprints at the start of the round

My point is: talk to your bros more

>be me, scientist
>get mid-round antag at the very end of the game
>Shit, what should I do?
>I could release the slimes, plasmaflood the entire station, robust everyone with hulk,...
>look through the syndi items
>Dehydrated carp [1 TC]
>1 TC
>why did I never see this?
>buy 20 carps
>put them in my backpack
>get an extinguisher
>go to departures
>place all the carps down
>hydrate them with my extinguisher
>get mauled down instantly

100% worth it
 
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Attached is a mini-map of the station

Medbay
1. Compressed medbay by removing the the second surgery area, primarily to
2. Move medical storage to the right of the exam room.
3. Expanded exam room and loaded it with 4 stasis beds by default.
4. Added cold room north of exam room that contains blood and oxygen cans.
5. Reorganized power on medbay so that the cold room contains an SMES with dedicated power to medbay.

Security
1. Replaced prison reception with the Warden's office.
2. Moved the armory west over where the old Warden's office was and reinforced the floors.
3. Moved the mining teleporter at the far north end of the prison wing.
4. Expanded the Infirmary and added an access point for medical staff to get in.
5. Expanded the Stardboard Maint around Detective's office.
6. Planted a happy little tree area.
7. Expanded the law office.

Dorms
1. Shrank the courtroom.
2. Completely redid the dorms.
3. Added a garden.
4. Added a fourth pod north of the holodeck.
 

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Regarding the personalisation of the server replicastudios.com seems like a decent artifical voice.
Free account allow for 30 minutes of voice, fill the survey form with garbage when making an account. I've used Thena's voice, and there do not seems to be any word filter.
 

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Chem can only make drugs to heal brain, eye and ear damage. Liver and lungs need reagents from botany.

The biggest problem here is the patient would need to be alive and out of stasis for any drugs to metabolise, which means broken hearts and lungs would still need to be replaced or repaired surgically to prevent them from immediately dying after defib, and if you're going to swap them out you might as well do the liver too while you've got the chest cavity open.

As a chemist it's easy enough to make oculine, inacusiate and inform medical staff to throw retards into a mannitol cryo and to treat eyes and ears chemically, but in practise that means doctors running back and forward from chem and having a bunch of confused patients crowding up exam because they can't explain to deaf blind retards that they're tick healing and don't need any more surgery.
I was looking over the wiki for some of the liver/lung medicine you mentioned.

Cordiolis Hepatico comes from strange seeds, the point of which is that they have random reagents picked from a list of almost everything in the game and as such can't be reliably farmed. Silibinin is a little better, but not much as it relies on random weed growth which also can't be reliably cultivated. It might pop up, but it could be anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour, if at all.

Libital and Polypyrylium Oligomers, however, are something that botany can reliably pump out if they make it a priority. I know you mentioned issues with using chems in general as opposed to just replacing organs, but if these liver/lung reagents were provided do you believe it would be worthwhile, or just go unused?
 
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