Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.
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- Sep 2, 2013
- Joined
- Jun 24, 2013
RogerRabbit1988 said:
http://ozzyguy.deviantart.com/journal/New-series-Toons-New-Generation-398751991#comments
Please don't ruin classic cartoon characters with god awful OC's.
G
GV 002
Guest
kiwifarms.net
Kolink from Pokefarm.com, Snapesnogger from DA (from ye olde ED trollins), and Ebon Lupus (again, back in the glory days when he was posting everywhere). All are pathetic, gross and funny at the same time.
PvtRichardCranium
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2013
There was this kid I knew in highschool that absolutely hated Mexicans and Bosnians (why?). He was this ginger redneck kid that was always threatening to shoot everyone in the school, and eventually people stopped taking his threats seriously.
His name was Payne Brimley. I'm pretty sure he has a Failbook but I haven't checked. Anyway, he hated when people said his last name because he hated his biological dad so I started calling him Payne Brimjob. It kind of caught on from there. These are the tales of Payne Brimjob.
Brimjob Versus PvtRichardCranium
Brimjob Versus Megan.
Brimjob versus PrivateRichardCranium: Part Two: Super Homo Edition
His name was Payne Brimley. I'm pretty sure he has a Failbook but I haven't checked. Anyway, he hated when people said his last name because he hated his biological dad so I started calling him Payne Brimjob. It kind of caught on from there. These are the tales of Payne Brimjob.
Brimjob Versus PvtRichardCranium
One day he was throwing stuff at me for some reason so I went up to him and slapped him in the back of the head. I didn't realize how hard I hit him and his face flew forward and hit the CRT Dell monitor he was sitting at. He started crying and saying I was going to hell and I got suspended.
So I stayed home all day and played Command and Conquer.
It was awesome
So I stayed home all day and played Command and Conquer.
It was awesome
Brimjob Versus Megan.
There was this chick that he for some reason had a thing for named Megan. Anyway, he was always sitting next to her and doing that douchebag thing where he would laugh twice as hard than other people at her unfunny jokes whenever she told one. So one day, Payne grew a sack and asked her out. Except he didn't ask her out, he said: "You know, I've always had a crush on you. How does that make you feel?"
After a few moments of awkward silence, Payne said: "I love you. You're hot."
Megan just sat there for a second and then left the room. Then her boyfriend kicked Payne's ass.
Her boyfriend got suspended and went to my house and we played Command and Conquer all day.
It was awesome.
After a few moments of awkward silence, Payne said: "I love you. You're hot."
Megan just sat there for a second and then left the room. Then her boyfriend kicked Payne's ass.
Her boyfriend got suspended and went to my house and we played Command and Conquer all day.
It was awesome.
Brimjob versus PrivateRichardCranium: Part Two: Super Homo Edition
One time Payne said that everyone in the school was a Super Homo. So for a while, we started calling him Super Homo Brimjob. He figured out that I was the one who came up with the nickname Payne Brimjob, and he came up to me and started calling me a Super Homo when he was in my gym class. He was pushing me and trying to knock me down. I looked at the gym teacher who was a total hardass, and he just said: "Don't be a pussy and fight back." We were playing basketball so I threw the basketball at his face. It bounced off and I caught it. He started running away crying (this was after I smacked him) and at this point I thought "what the hell" and hit him in the back of the head with it. He fell down and just lay there for a while. We went back to playing basketball without him.
Since it was the gym teacher and he never reports petty violence like that I didn't get suspended and didn't spend all day playing Command and Conquer.
It was still awesome though.
Since it was the gym teacher and he never reports petty violence like that I didn't get suspended and didn't spend all day playing Command and Conquer.
It was still awesome though.
TheRedRanger
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2013
Well, there's this ad that came up in a local paper recently. I'm still debating whether or not to troll this guy, and how to do it...
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2013
There was a kid in the town I grew up with who used to beat me up. He even did time in the kiddy clink for it, among other criminal things. Years later my Dad, who worked for the Department of Corrections, comes home and hands me a file. He says "remember this asshole?" I look and lo and behold it's the guy's criminal record, including time spent in the Utah State Prison. A couple years more go by and I'm reading an article about him being involved in three race related beatings with two other men, and then ratted out the other guys, including the head of a local White Power group, to get a reduced sentence. Last I heard there were a few Skinheads who are looking for his ass for being a race traitor.
José Mourinho
The Special One
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True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
I almost forgot this user as well: pkstarstorm1up, used to rage about people posting "lies" about his so-called underrated game "Sonic '06". Used to follow him like two years ago. Well, missed some stuff:
1. http://pkstarstorm1up.deviantart.com/jo ... -372337530
2. His YouTube Channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/pkstarstorm1up/
3. http://segaforums.wikia.com/wiki/Pkstarstorm1up
Oh my God. He even had a SEGA Forums wiki article criticising him.
4. http://blazehedgehog.tumblr.com/post/19 ... -3-12-2012
A Tumblr post about him.
5. http://sonic.wikia.com/wiki/User_talk
kstarstorm1up
His talk page on the Sonic wiki.
6. http://forums.sega.com/member.php?157651-pkstarstorm1up
His account on the SEGA forums.
6.1: http://forums.sega.com/showthread.php?4 ... liked-more
His thread about why he thinks Sonic '06 is "a great game and why it's should be liked more".
1. http://pkstarstorm1up.deviantart.com/jo ... -372337530
2. His YouTube Channel: http://www.youtube.com/user/pkstarstorm1up/
3. http://segaforums.wikia.com/wiki/Pkstarstorm1up
Oh my God. He even had a SEGA Forums wiki article criticising him.
4. http://blazehedgehog.tumblr.com/post/19 ... -3-12-2012
A Tumblr post about him.
5. http://sonic.wikia.com/wiki/User_talk
kstarstorm1upHis talk page on the Sonic wiki.
6. http://forums.sega.com/member.php?157651-pkstarstorm1up
His account on the SEGA forums.
6.1: http://forums.sega.com/showthread.php?4 ... liked-more
His thread about why he thinks Sonic '06 is "a great game and why it's should be liked more".
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
I'm guessing they write slash about Nazi's simply because of the uniforms (which according to TV Tropes and Wikipedia) were by Hugo Boss. Only other reason I can think off is that some of them might be neo-Nazi's but then again aren't some neo-Nazi's homophobes?Stalin said:
- Joined
- Jul 26, 2013
c-no said:
Their uniforms may have been cool but that doesn't mean I want to read Hitler/Himmler slash.
Yes, neo-Nazi's are homophobes. Basically any white supremacy group is since gay people don't have kids and produce more white people.
I just find it wildly disrespectful to all the gay people that died in the concentration camps.
B
BT 075
Guest
kiwifarms.net
Stalin said:
Ahum... young Hitler was quite a classy mofo:
Young Stalin's intense gaze and poofy hair, all gelled up, sure gives Der Fuhrer a run for his money though:
Then there's Goebbels. He wasn't much to look at but being a bit of a cripple, by wizardchan logic he must have been a quite a beast in the sack.
Talk about animal magnetism...
- Joined
- Jun 29, 2013
http://steveanime.deviantart.com
Has an unhealthy fixation with: Chuck E. Cheese's, Officer Jenny (Pokemon), Mitsuru Kirijou (Persona), Michael Jackson and theme parks. He seems to pester a lot of artists to draw for him; I should know, I was one of them. I noticed comments from other people that are annoyed by him, but I'm too lazy to take screenshots. He's rather troll-resistant since any ounce of negativity is blocked-on-site.
Has an unhealthy fixation with: Chuck E. Cheese's, Officer Jenny (Pokemon), Mitsuru Kirijou (Persona), Michael Jackson and theme parks. He seems to pester a lot of artists to draw for him; I should know, I was one of them. I noticed comments from other people that are annoyed by him, but I'm too lazy to take screenshots. He's rather troll-resistant since any ounce of negativity is blocked-on-site.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
- Joined
- Jun 21, 2013
sparklemilhouse said:
That was supposed to be funny?
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
I'm in a real talkative mood this evening, so I'm going to share with you my ultimate personal lolcow: Lily.
Lily is related to my friend via an unfortunate union (she's not actually a blood relative is what I'm saying here). The first time I'd heard of her was a few years ago on a trip to Target with said friend, who was buying a gift for Lily's newborn "baby". Keep those quotes in mind. That same night my friend texts Lily asking when is a good time to visit her and the baby, but doesn't get an answer. The next day she reads a post on Lily's myspace stating, "If you recently purchased anything for [kid's name, whatever it was doesn't matter and you'll see why], please return it as they passed away last night from SIDS."
My friend told me this and that she confirmed via relatives that this baby never existed. This girl was posting someone else's baby pictures online, claiming them to be hers. There were no pictures of her and the baby. Just a random baby. I'm never going to forget when we went back to Target to return the baby clothes and the woman at the guest services counter goes, "Oh who had a baby?!" and my friend looked at her and said so bluntly, "NO ONE." I almost died.
This is where the story of Lily would end....if it HAD an ending.
Since that incident we've come to the realization that this girl is a textbook compulsive liar. She's our personal case study. Every few months, she becomes "pregnant" by some random dude that she's "dating" until they get "engaged" and then she has a "miscarriage". This isn't a one-off thing. She does this at least twice a year. If she isn't creating fake babies, then it's the fake facebook profiles for her "boyfriends" and "besties". She had the balls to make up a guy who had kids, only to say that one of his kids was tragically hit by a car and died. Two weeks later she was seeing someone else who coincidentally also had a private profile who's timeline began the month before.
I should probably mention that Lily is a giant bulldog of a woman. I got the honor of meeting her when she was in town at a rando's house party one night. She's built like a linebacker and has the deepest voice I've ever heard come from an alleged female. To the normal person she's incredibly intimidating to be around because of her size and because she has a really shitty attitude, but I must've been super nice to her when I met her (drunk pickleniggo is always a blast to be around - especially around awkward people she may have dirt on) because she found me on facebook hours later.
BUT WAIT IT GETS SO MUCH BETTER, Y'ALL.
One time, Lily posted a sonogram stating it was hers. But something about the sonogram just didn't add up. In fact the font on some of it - such as her name and the date - didn't match the font or even the pixellation of other parts. Then I noticed a really strange blotch in the corner. For shits and giggles, I popped it in photoshop and matched the blotch to a similar part of the sonogram and figured out that she took a piece of the original image, copied it and squished it over what must've been the original text on the sonogram. This is how insane she is.
I could go on about other things she's done, but it's all pretty much of the same. She eventually un-friended me, probably because it became obvious that I would only comment things like, "OH HOW EXCITING WHEN'S THE BABY DUE." (
)
Lily is related to my friend via an unfortunate union (she's not actually a blood relative is what I'm saying here). The first time I'd heard of her was a few years ago on a trip to Target with said friend, who was buying a gift for Lily's newborn "baby". Keep those quotes in mind. That same night my friend texts Lily asking when is a good time to visit her and the baby, but doesn't get an answer. The next day she reads a post on Lily's myspace stating, "If you recently purchased anything for [kid's name, whatever it was doesn't matter and you'll see why], please return it as they passed away last night from SIDS."
My friend told me this and that she confirmed via relatives that this baby never existed. This girl was posting someone else's baby pictures online, claiming them to be hers. There were no pictures of her and the baby. Just a random baby. I'm never going to forget when we went back to Target to return the baby clothes and the woman at the guest services counter goes, "Oh who had a baby?!" and my friend looked at her and said so bluntly, "NO ONE." I almost died.
This is where the story of Lily would end....if it HAD an ending.
Since that incident we've come to the realization that this girl is a textbook compulsive liar. She's our personal case study. Every few months, she becomes "pregnant" by some random dude that she's "dating" until they get "engaged" and then she has a "miscarriage". This isn't a one-off thing. She does this at least twice a year. If she isn't creating fake babies, then it's the fake facebook profiles for her "boyfriends" and "besties". She had the balls to make up a guy who had kids, only to say that one of his kids was tragically hit by a car and died. Two weeks later she was seeing someone else who coincidentally also had a private profile who's timeline began the month before.
I should probably mention that Lily is a giant bulldog of a woman. I got the honor of meeting her when she was in town at a rando's house party one night. She's built like a linebacker and has the deepest voice I've ever heard come from an alleged female. To the normal person she's incredibly intimidating to be around because of her size and because she has a really shitty attitude, but I must've been super nice to her when I met her (drunk pickleniggo is always a blast to be around - especially around awkward people she may have dirt on) because she found me on facebook hours later.
BUT WAIT IT GETS SO MUCH BETTER, Y'ALL.
One time, Lily posted a sonogram stating it was hers. But something about the sonogram just didn't add up. In fact the font on some of it - such as her name and the date - didn't match the font or even the pixellation of other parts. Then I noticed a really strange blotch in the corner. For shits and giggles, I popped it in photoshop and matched the blotch to a similar part of the sonogram and figured out that she took a piece of the original image, copied it and squished it over what must've been the original text on the sonogram. This is how insane she is.
I could go on about other things she's done, but it's all pretty much of the same. She eventually un-friended me, probably because it became obvious that I would only comment things like, "OH HOW EXCITING WHEN'S THE BABY DUE." (
)