Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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Shadow Fox said:
Bart Bervoets, aka Nekobe the Lion, furry sex fiend and psychopath. I think his lolcow udders have dried up by now, most of his lulzy activity seems to have happened in 2000 and 2001, but the documentation of it that exists is amazing. The site hosting most of the information seems to have gone tits up, so here's a Wayback Machine link: http://web.archive.org/web/20070127163332/http://www.knightwolfsrealm.com/moose/documents/

According to a quick google search he admitted himself in for professional treatment for bipolar disorder back in '08. So it seems like he did finally get the help he needed. Thats assuming WikiFur is an accurate source mind you. The claim was properly sourced from what it seemed, although I'll admit I didn't read too far into the message post, since I really didn't feel like reading a bunch of poorly written posts at this hour..
 
The sad thing is that's not fake. One year on vacation my Uncle came crying to us after he saw his wife had played him and all these other men. I wish I was making this up.
 
I have a few lolcows in my family. Example: My maternal grandmother is going through chemo right now and has been sort of lethargic. This, combined with years of an unhealthy lifestyle, has finally taken its toll, as she recently discovered she has several clots that could be life threatening. Upon discovering this news, my mother and my grandmother's doctor both urged her to start getting moderate amounts of exercise regularly to actually take care of the problem.

My aunt, on the other hand, encouraged my grandmother (who also has clinical depression and thus a lack of motivation) to continue her sedentary lifestyle, asspatting her to hell and back in a way that could legitimately endanger her life. On top of that, she's been attention-mongering hardcore on facebook, playing up how tragic this all is in a way that shines the spotlight on her and gets her some much-desired asspats. It's sort of at the point where it's starting to come off as her encouraging my grandmother not to get healthy so that she (my aunt) can baww about it for sympathy.
 
So I was following some drama about Moleman9000, until I came across this wiki which Moleman9000 was tardraging in there. Initially, I just brush it off as some stupid wiki, but one closer look revealed how terribly hilarious and lulzy the wiki is. I bring to you... the Real Life Villains Wiki . You thought that this wiki is got to do with villains that got to do with real life? Hahaha, no.

I'll split this wiki into three parts:

1. Pages we need to add

http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wik ... eed_to_add

Basically it's a page which is some sort of a "request page", or a "waiting list". Now it's more of a personal army list and with stupid examples. Ever got bullied yesterday in school by someone who called you a "fartlunch"? Ever got an arch-nemesis in real life? Then there you go, be sure to add them to this list! Back then, there were examples which are later reverted, such as the Republican Party, Creepypasta (Which later had an article there), Sonic.exe (Same as Creepypasta, srsly), but then let me filter the ones that are notable:

The Stupid List said:
* Anti-Bronies ; Organizations, Bullies, Male Villains, Trash Talking Villains, Jerks and Internet Related Pages
* Authoritarianism, action
* Blue Screen of Death, Villainous Event/Internet Related Villains/Destroyer
* Cannibals (history)
* Computer viruses (Seriously, why the fuck they need one?)
* Gold-Digging ; action
* Hate Club , evil first graders
* Hispanophobia ; dislike/fear of Hipanics
* Kamikaze , event
* Korean War, event
* Landslide (Seriously, fucking landslides deserve one as well)
* Lamar S. Smith, He Use SOPA to Block Around the Internet to make People (Suicide, Angry and Kill Him) For Lamar S. Smith for Been a Villain
* Movieguide, hate website
* Poverty
* Riots, event
* Sandstorm, disaster
* Typhoon, disaster
* Violence Against Women
* Violence
* Willow Giovanna, extreme cyberbully (aka the troll who trolled Moleman9000, he was the one who added it)

2. Stupid articles

So now we have this stupid list, what if they were written? Well there they are. It's basically ones which are unrelated to real life, villains, both and even fucking neither. I highly doubt that the staff even knew what are the terms "Real Life" and "Villains".

* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wik ... %28Game%29 (The aforementioned Sonic.exe)
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wik ... ats_Writer (Some troll/trolls who wrote threats to a 5-year old)
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Satan Even Satan fucking deserves one.
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Cancer Cancer.
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Justin_Bieber (Seriously. Justin Fucking Bieber.)
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/HIV/AIDS (HIV/AIDS)
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/SOPA SOPA.
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/TV_Tropes Don't forget TV Tropes!
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Fast_Eddie And Fast Eddie!
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Tropers And the evil tropers!
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Capcom And Capcom is one of these real-life villains along with Adolf Hitler and.... landslides.
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Hideo_Kojima Hideo Kojima deserves one too.
* http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Creepypasta Don't forget Creepypasta!


3. Articles filled with butthurt

Basically the best part in my opinion. These are the articles that are filled with butthurt, tardrage, and BAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWtism.

1. Mark Zuckerberg: http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wik ... Zuckerberg
Mark Zuckerberg (born on 14 may 1984) is the CEO and founder of Facebook. However, he has not been treating Facebook well; Often, he has let cyberbullies and trolls onto the site without knowing it, letting them roam free and threaten people in real life to commit suicide when they become victims of cyberbullying. He also bans people from roleplaying on the site, mainly because they aren't "real people". Facebook violates privacity of other people.

2. Trolls: http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wik ... nternet%29
....Trolls come in many shapes and form, ranging from the whimsical to the downright malevolent but most share a common goal: to disrupt the lives of others, they especially delight in causing mischief within online communities and are seen by many as a scourge on their sites (although some sites encourage trolls, these sites see trolling as a subculture rather than a sin)....

3. Bullies: http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Bully
Type of Bullies:

Lunch Money Thief: The Bullys will Punch at the Kid to Blackmail to Need a Money to make the Kid Staving to Death
Namecalling: Some Bullys will can use the Namecalling like: Jackass, *Your Fav Characters* is Dead, You Suck Sh!thead and Others
Cyber-Bullies: The Cyber-Bullies is keep messing the Users and Killing Everyone to Comment Suicide

4. The United States School System: http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wik ... ool_System
Bullying is common, but what is just as bad is some noteable bullies get away scott-free for their actions. This is because of the leadership of certain School systems that make America look like a cruel dictatorship....

5. Cyberbullies: http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Cyberbullies
Cyberbullies are bullies who use the internet as means of harming people. It often can get really hostile. It is the most commonly done by adolescents and younger adults. In most states; they have laws against cyberbullying. One typical example of cyberbullying is Happy Slapping in which a person is attacked and the attack is filmed on a mobile phone. This part isn't cyberbullying but then the attack is uploaded onto a computer often to victims as a threat.
 
Alan Pardew said:
So I was following some drama about Moleman9000, until I came across this wiki which Moleman9000 was tardraging in there. Initially, I just brush it off as some stupid wiki, but one closer look revealed how terribly hilarious and lulzy the wiki is. I bring to you... the Real Life Villains Wiki . You thought that this wiki is got to do with villains that got to do with real life? Hahaha, no.

Ilovemugen94
ilovemugen94 is a user on Youtube, on Wikia Datbase and on Deviantart. He is a troll of mugen community, he never stops trolling Theiransonic and his fans.

Bob Chipman
Bob Chipman, aka Movie Bob, is a film critic. He bashes and hates on The Expendables film series mainly because of it beating out Scott Pilgrim vs. The World at the box office. He also hates The Expendables 2 and considers it to be one of the worst movies of 2012. He even hates the action and the actors and says that people who like The Expendables series should be ashamed of themselves for not seeing Scott Pilgrim instead and for liking The Expendables in general.

4chan cliquebases
4chan is a site known for groups and organizations who cause havoc around the internet. There are multiple examples, many of which commit crimes in real life also. An example is a select group of bronies who have in some cases commit bestiality against real horses and members usually hate those who dislike My Little Pony. 4chan is the troll capital of the internet. Porn is commonly distributed by users of this site to sites like wikia even to unsuspecting minors, and many of wikia trolls come from this site, some have probably come on RLVW also.

Aww. There is a category for JERKS and Satan is on it. That's precious.
 
I had an Argentinian online friend who I considered a lolcow. We got along great at first but as I aged and matured he sort of didn't.
Just a short list of things he did:
-Always did the exact opposite of what I said and then complained when it didn't work out.
-Developed a gay crush on me and was not subtle about it at all.
-"Ironically" sprouted memes over and over, daily.
-chimped out when I called him CWC.
-Flaunts about how his father owns several factories and is a powerful figure in Argentina. Also chimps out when I call his dad a crimeboss.
-Has autism.
So yeah he was fun until I cut ties with him. I wish I knew more lolcows, personally, but this is all I got.
 
Alan Pardew said:
caffeinated_wench said:
Alan Pardew said:
Just added, Apparently a fucking Suicide Letter deserves an article on the Real Life Villains Wiki.

http://real-life-villains.wikia.com/wiki/Suicide_Letter
While it does offer a hotline and has some encouragement, why is it a VILLAIN?

Can a letter even BE a villain?

Well, apparently it does according to the wiki, since it's under the category of "Villainous Item". :roll:
That's dumb.
 
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