I think the worst lolcow I have ever met was one that lived with us for four years.
The original agreement was that she would stay for one year, find a job, and move out by the end of it. She bitched and cried when we asked if she was still looking after seven months and no job. This cow tortured me as I had to share a room with the thing. Her troll hole was piled with trash and crusty undies, always smelled like shit, and she lay there in what resembled an ancient muumuu telling tumblr how much she wanted to kill herself. She'd cut her thighs and keep me awake with her whale noises.
When she finally got a job, she worked in sanitation, ironically being the most unclean person I have ever known. She also bitched because they called her a girl when she's a precious agender angel child. She never washed her hands and took 4 minute showers. She gave herself the stomach flu 5 times and charitably spread it around. At one point, when she got the flu, she forced us to take her to the ER, screaming, spitting and pretending to vomit the whole six hours we were there. They charged her extra for the disturbance.
When she walked, she only stomped and her feet made these sickeningly wet noises with every step. She began spending her newfound wealth on anime figures (I once found her porn blog and I'm 99% sure she shoved those figures up her ass.) and food that she hoarded in her room so that no one could eat it after she devoured what was available to the general public, inhaling all but the kitchen counters.
There were times where she had literal tantrums; she plugged her ears, screamed, kicked and the whole shebang. Got my mom on her side after admitting to me she was purposely manipulative and would run to her any time I told her not to do something.
I once made food for my bf and said she could have one...she ate them all and whaled under her blanket when I told her off.
Oh, and she told her mom to kill herself (and she did).
She now lives with a new friend, mooching off of her family, devouring them out of house and home "searching" for a new job. Her days are so full between the begging for money online and making a new post each day threatening to kill herself.
I didn't want to make this too long so this is just a handful of stuff. Let me know if you want to hear more about the hambeast.
Jeffrey has yet to see the inside of a courtroom over the incident in January, but from what I've heard so far their defense seems to be a combination of "affluenza" and "adult autistic child."
I think the worst lolcow I have ever met was one that lived with us for four years.
The original agreement was that she would stay for one year, find a job, and move out by the end of it. She bitched and cried when we asked if she was still looking after seven months and no job. This cow tortured me as I had to share a room with the thing. Her troll hole was piled with trash and crusty undies, always smelled like shit, and she lay there in what resembled an ancient muumuu telling tumblr how much she wanted to kill herself. She'd cut her thighs and keep me awake with her whale noises.
When she finally got a job, she worked in sanitation, ironically being the most unclean person I have ever known. She also bitched because they called her a girl when she's a precious agender angel child. She never washed her hands and took 4 minute showers. She gave herself the stomach flu 5 times and charitably spread it around. At one point, when she got the flu, she forced us to take her to the ER, screaming, spitting and pretending to vomit the whole six hours we were there. They charged her extra for the disturbance.
When she walked, she only stomped and her feet made these sickeningly wet noises with every step. She began spending her newfound wealth on anime figures (I once found her porn blog and I'm 99% sure she shoved those figures up her ass.) and food that she hoarded in her room so that no one could eat it after she devoured what was available to the general public, inhaling all but the kitchen counters.
There were times where she had literal tantrums; she plugged her ears, screamed, kicked and the whole shebang. Got my mom on her side after admitting to me she was purposely manipulative and would run to her any time I told her not to do something.
I once made food for my bf and said she could have one...she ate them all and whaled under her blanket when I told her off.
Oh, and she told her mom to kill herself (and she did).
She now lives with a new friend, mooching off of her family, devouring them out of house and home "searching" for a new job. Her days are so full between the begging for money online and making a new post each day threatening to kill herself.
I didn't want to make this too long so this is just a handful of stuff. Let me know if you want to hear more about the hambeast.
So, let me tell you about my friend's Dad. My friends from college know him as "porn dad".
Growing up, my friends and I thought he was a pretty cool guy. He would take all of us to go watch wrestling, miniature wargaming conventions, run our dungeons and dragons games, and play magic the gathering with us.
As an adult, we realized he had full blown autism.
First of all, he had a huge pornography collection. Like, a legitimate attic full of pornography magazines (which he calls "fuck books"). He kept this porn in his mother's attic even though he did not live with her. I would go over there with my friend and play with action figures as a child while he would spend hours in the attic admiring his porn. He wouldn't even jerk off, he would sit there and just admire it.
He hates internet porn, like absolutely hates it. He got into an argument with a friend about it: Friend: I have more porn on these five CDs (this is the late 90s btw) than you do in that attic. Porn Dad: Oh yeah? Well one time I was up in the attic, and there was a bat so I took a stack of my fuck books and crushed that bat with it! I would like to see you try that with a stack of CDs!
That was literally the only justification he could come up with as to why print pornography was better than digital.
The day my friend (his only child) was born, his father-in-law gave him $20 bucks to buy a sandwich. He took that money and bought porn instead of a sandwich. His ex-wife (who is just plain batshit crazy) told me this story the day their granddaughter was born.
Last time I saw him was around another grandchild's birthday. I said "How are you today [Porndad]?" His response was "I was expecting my barely legal teens magazine in the mail but instead it was a bunch of cards for my brat grandson."
He married a mail order bride from the Philippines. She was a whore. Literally. She exchanged sex for money as her job back home. Predictably, he paid to bring her two bastard children over to the US and he helped her get a job at the factory where he was a bookkeeper (ideal job for an autistic) and she divorced him, maxed out their shared credit cards, took the house, and banged all his coworkers.
After the divorce, he moved in with his Mom. In true lolcow fashion, the house (and all of his porn) burned down due to an electrical fire.
He is unable to control his volume (another sign of autism) and is incapable of whispering, even when his grandchildren are sleeping.
He has an obsession for the original dungeons and dragons, which he modified with articles and rules in old Dragon Magazines. He hates Advanced Dungeons and Dragons and later editions because he thinks skill checks and feats are "gay". He also hates Monks as a character class. He refuses to play and instead reads porno mags in his room, randomly wandering out to tell an inappropriate joke or to mock us for making a skill check.
Recently, he was banging a 70something year old woman with dementia. He considered this a great accomplishment since it was his friend's mom and one of the first people he ever jerked off to as a child.
He's a hardcore Republican and doesn't think schools or roads should be funded by the government and that you should be able to take care of yourself. He has a degree in history but refuses to teach because "teachers are the enemy". He hates unions, yet is constantly laid off at work even though he's worked there 30+ years. He constantly spouts his hatred for welfare even though his son's family (who moved in with him after his aforementioned mother went into a nursing home) gets $800 a month in food stamps, which he eats. He used to make his son not wear a coat during the winter because he knew the school would give him a free coat like they do with all impoverished kids. He could afford a coat, but he was cheap, had no shame, and was taking advantage of the system. When he loses arguments with me (I teach ppl how to argue a living and he's autistic, so trust me, he definitely loses) he starts screaming and hurling insults and ragequits.
I don't have anything to show you internet wise because he lives so far out in the middle of nowhere that they are unable to get internet.
Ladies and Gentlemen I have a massive porn dad update for you
first of all, porn dad attended my wedding. he kept gawking at my wife and later came up to me and told me "I am so proud of you, I love asian women".
I spoke to his son last month and he told me that they finally, in the year of our lord 2017, acquired internet out in the boonies and Porn Dad discovered PornHub. He has finally ditched his print porn collection in favor of streaming porn online. He watches it with the volume up full blast and doesn't give a fuck about it... his grandchildren will be in the next room (aged 4-10) playing with blocks and stuff while "OH YEAH FUCK ME IN THE ASS OH YEAH BABY" blares in the background.
We can hold up hope that now that porn dad has hispeed internet, he will get on social media to find himself a sweetheart from the ground up.
once upon a time there was a medieval lord of a castle who was sent off to the crusades. he was worried about his wife staying faithful to him and summoned a wizard to help him out. The wizard cast a curse on his wife's vagina that every dick that enters it would fall off after a day. After the lord returned from the crusades, he ordered his men to drop their pants. Only one had his dick still remaining, so the lord sent the dickless men off to be executed and told the one man with his dick in tact, "good sir, you are my only loyal faithful follower. You may have anything your heart desires!" The follower replied "Rah ah ha ahh lah ah!"
You know that "how do you do fellow kids?" meme? He actually tried that at one point claiming to be a "DJ" called "Dinlo Harrison" for reasons that are unfathomable.
Oh god. I just remembered an amazing piece of shit I used to have to deal with.
So I'm friends with a group of people who livestream video games, and they have a small but dedicated fanbase. A few years ago, when I had more free time on my hands, they appointed me as a chat moderator.
This fucking kid showed up out of nowhere. DarthNightmaricus. Bragged about being mature for 14 years old, constantly attacked and picked on everyone in the chat, took particular care to go after people who didn't exactly have the best self-confidence. Also did some pretty dumbfuck things like posting his address in the chat on one occasion, starting arguments over things that had just happened and everyone had witnessed, or arguments over things nobody gave a shit about. I think there were multiple times he posted or linked to Pokémon fetish art as well, despite NSFW content being against chat rules (along with basically everything else he did). He'd fit in here if he wasn't such an exceptional idiot.
Now, despite a little off-color or offensive humor here or there, this particular livestream channel does what they can to make the viewers feel welcome and included. And despite being told multiple times why his behavior was upsetting other people, DN refused to cut that shit out. So he was banned from the channel, and also from the offsite forums (where he'd also registered).
But it doesn't end there. Not by a long shot. A long-time chat member (we'll call him E) did some simple Google research and found out that our friend DarthNightmaricus had accounts on many other sites (such as gamefaqs) and had been banned from every single one of those sites as well.
But we're STILL NOT DONE.
Some time after Darth's ban, another new user popped up in a stream, claiming to be a "female identifying hermaphrodite." (A number of the chat regulars are openly LGBT+, so this wasn't THAT weird, aside from people like that generally using the word "intersex" these days.) But this Sailor character starts referencing things from past streams. Channel manager checks the VODs and reports that Sailor accounts for precisely zero of the views. Channel hasn't uploaded anything to YouTube at this point.
I forget exactly how we were able to obtain an IP address – I think "Sailor" registered on the forums. Chat member E looked up the IP info, and was able to match it to the same block as the address that dumbass Darth had posted himself. "Sailor" was banned again for ban evasion.
And despite all of his attempts to get around the ban, he never contacted any of us to ask to be unbanned.
(Fun fact: at one point we were considering buying a bunch of Bad Dragon dicks and having them sent to his house.)
Your Lolcow did a wiki on herself as a Dark Lord of the Sith. You can tell it's her due to both DarthNightmaricus on Twitch and the author of this both like Pluto. http://swfanon.wikia.com/wiki/Darth_Nightmaricus
Okay, so, I was doing a bit of work today and randomly started thinking about shit from elementary school. I totally forgot about Jeffrey making death threats to a girl when we were in third grade and dragging another kid who had nothing to do with it into the situation.
There was this girl named Alyssa. She was fairly easy to get along with. A little quiet, and didn't really ever do anything to stir the pot. Jeffrey, being the habitual pot-stirrer that he was, decided that he didn't like her because reasons. So he'd go out of his way to bully and harass her. She really liked horses, so he'd do shit like tell her that his dad owned a "horse-killing factory" in Italy (reminder: he never met his dad because he left when Jeffrey was three; I don't know why he specified Italy though, because we aren't Italian). Stupid elementary school bully stuff, y'know? She actually didn't give much of a shit about anything that he did and shrugged the majority of it off. I think that irritated him more because he was used to getting reactions.
Well...he eventually got one.
Before I go any further, I've got to tell you about Ethan. Ethan was a kid in our grade who was pretty much your average jock (popular, played sports, etc.). Because of his popularity, Jeffrey decided that he and Ethan were best friends. After all, Jeffrey was one of the popular kids too, in his mind. Ethan didn't like Jeffrey (though, not many people did; hard to believe, right?) but they'd been in the same classes previous years and Ethan just kind of let Jeffrey hang around him because he didn't annoy him enough to get him to put up a fight about it. As with most jocks, Ethan was a bit of a dick too, actually, so he and Jeffrey had enough common ground for the latter to believe they were friends. They were split up in third grade, but Jeffrey would still talk about him and Ethan and how they were going to turn into werewolves and destroy the school and shit (Ethan liked werewolves, so Jeffrey decided he did too to copy him). In reality, the fact that they weren't in the same class anymore meant that Ethan and Jeffrey had very little contact.
Back to Alyssa. See, the thing about her was that her mother was one of the teachers at the school. She just so happened to teach third grade at the time, as a matter of fact. Jeffrey and Alyssa weren't in her class (presumably because the district wouldn't allow her to have her daughter as a student), but Ethan was. During one of the times he was trying to get a rise out of her, he mentioned how him and Ethan were planning on coming to her house and blowing it up. She told her mom about this, and got both Jeffrey and Ethan called to the office, along with their parents being called. Ethan, as I said, had barely any contact with Jeffrey by then so he had no clue what the hell was going on. From what I remember, he didn't actually get into any trouble because he didn't do anything. Jeffrey got suspended for 5 days, months of mandatory counseling, and his PlayStation taken away for the 5 days he was out of school. This was only a couple years after 9/11, too, so it's amazing that that's all he got for making what essentially was a terrorist threat (albeit not an actionable one).
Okay, so, I was doing a bit of work today and randomly started thinking about shit from elementary school. I totally forgot about Jeffrey making death threats to a girl when we were in third grade and dragging another kid who had nothing to do with it into the situation.
There was this girl named Alyssa. She was fairly easy to get along with. A little quiet, and didn't really ever do anything to stir the pot. Jeffrey, being the habitual pot-stirrer that he was, decided that he didn't like her because reasons. So he'd go out of his way to bully and harass her. She really liked horses, so he'd do shit like tell her that his dad owned a "horse-killing factory" in Italy (reminder: he never met his dad; I don't know why he specified Italy though, because we aren't Italian). Stupid elementary school bully stuff, y'know? She actually didn't give much of a shit about anything that he did and shrugged the majority of it off. I think that irritated him more because he was used to getting reactions.
Well...he eventually got one.
Before I go any further, I've got to tell you about Ethan. Ethan was a kid in our grade who was pretty much your average jock (popular, played sports, etc.). Because of his popularity, Jeffrey decided that he and Ethan were best friends. After all, Jeffrey was one of the popular kids too, in his mind. Ethan didn't like Jeffrey (though, not many people did; hard to believe, right?) but they'd been in the same classes previous years and Ethan just kind of let Jeffrey hang around him because he didn't annoy him enough to get him to put up a fight about it. As with most jocks, Ethan was a bit of a dick too, actually, so he and Jeffrey had enough common ground for the latter to believe they were friends. They were split up in third grade, but Jeffrey would still talk about him and Ethan and how they were going to turn into werewolves and destroy the school and shit (Ethan liked werewolves, so Jeffrey decided he did too to copy him). In reality, the fact that they weren't in the same class anymore meant that Ethan and Jeffrey had very little contact.
Back to Alyssa. See, the thing about her was that her mother was one of the teachers at the school. She just so happened to teach third grade at the time, as a matter of fact. Jeffrey and Alyssa weren't in her class (presumably because the district wouldn't allow her to have her daughter as a student), but Ethan was. During one of the times he was trying to get a rise out of her, he mentioned how him and Ethan were planning on coming to her house and blowing it up. She told her mom about this, and got both Jeffrey and Ethan called to the office, along with their parents being called. Ethan, as I said, had barely any contact with Jeffrey by then so he had no clue what the hell was going on. From what I remember, he didn't actually get into any trouble because he didn't do anything. Jeffrey got suspended for 5 days, months of mandatory counseling, and his PlayStation taken away for the 5 days he was out of school. This was only a couple years after 9/11, too, so it's amazing that that's all he got for making what essentially was a terrorist threat (albeit not an actionable one).
I was going to ask why this Jeffery person was saying he was going to kill someone, then I saw 9/11 so it made more sense. Telling someone they'll kill them or blow something up is more of a 2000's thing. Before that, we just told people they'd get beaten up or something similar. My have times changed.
I found the post, there's 65 total notes on it. 36 of the notes are from her reblogging the damn post over and over again. It's always anxiety and depression. We need more content, I'm curious.
Okay got some updates of my LOLcow and she is certainly going over the deep end.
Aparenttly she is a unabashed pedo kinkster cause she is willing to take picture of her fat ass and continue drawing and fantizing about pedophillia.
She seriously needs a intervention by either her parents or the fucking police. She is literally going around :Look at me I think pedophillia is so cute and sexy and here's my face to show the face behind the pedophile content! Just don't call the cops. Tee hee"
Like holy shit girl even lolicon artists have the decancecy to not show there face in public holy shit.
(Also She is using pictures of actual children for ref on her degenrate shit.)
it even gets creepier from here on out.
(Nothing gets her crank going than some good old fashion loli bondage)
And 8 years old is legal for her to do this to Lisa. I feel very concerned for her mental state at this point.
And she loves it when "daddy" :plays" with Lisa. Holy fuck!
But wait it gets worse.
This is her on her Ask FM account balantly saying she wants Lisa to be some sort of Succubus or some shit.
And here she is referenceing Lolita with her pedophillia. Whats more erotic than a old man jerking it to some 8 year olds feet.
And here she is drawing her succubus rape fantasies.
You know that did occur to me but when I was talking to her the only reasoning she gave me was this shit makes her happy and that book like Lolita exist even though that is not even what the book was for. In all seriousness she just seems like a degenerate moron who uses any media that is similar to her fetish and use it as a excuse to do it. I highly doubt she was molested but if she was she is going about the wrong way.
She comes off as totally normal and unwilling to listen to reason. Plus she is writhe with intellectual falacies. Kinda like a pedophile trying to rationalize actually.
I run a stall to raise money for charity at a local anime convention, and while I am used to anime conventions being full of eccentrics and the socially awkward, normally it doesn't bother me that much. As long as someone's relatively harmless I will be nice as pie.
The first encounter was with Sweaty McLeather. I have known this guy for quite a while, but it's a sort of politeness-bordering-on-contempt kind of feeling I have towards him. He has form for being a booth barnacle, hanging around stalls staffed by girls he likes, taking pictures without permission, that sort of thing. He stopped hanging around my stall after I scared him away, but he will stand right in front of my friend's stall for hours, leaving when asked only to wander back over in minutes. He scares away her customers and she's too polite to tell him to fuck off.
Just recently, Sweaty created a newsletter to hand out at conventions. It was a long and disturbing diatribe about how he feels like an outcast and people should be nicer to him, along with some very worrying views on what women should and shouldn't be allowed to find creepy. It was a view into his mind I wished I never had.
So with this in mind, this weekend I had just finished a panel and was heading back to my stall when Sweaty comes in to present his panel. He made a joke about how I was always delaying his panels at conventions (I had left him a good ten minutes to set up), to my knowledge I have never had a panel before one of his before. He tried to tell me a funny story about delayed panels (I was visibly backing towards the door) and then slipped into this angry rant about some person he hated who was at his last panel and how he had to be professional and not beat the guy up...
I also had to deal with Rushmore, who is younger and (I thought) less creepy than Sweaty, and he had bought stuff from my stall before so I humored his ramblings about video games. Then for some reason he came out to me and my stall assistant (it was her first convention and first time talking to this guy) as a furry, gave us a long speech about why Undertale was his personal savior, and finished with an in-depth description of some game that features a bratty princess that gets spanked.
Oh, and there was also a guy that said we shouldn't go to Germany for a video game event because it's full of immigrants who will rape us. We only spoke to him once so he doesn't really count.
I just got through with dealing with one of my own. I'll call him Peter for the purposes of this little recap.
I had met Peter through some kind of Garry's Mod developer Steam group (:autism: I know) after the owner (this 15-year-old Russian kid, another personal cow of mine and a really great story I should tell sometime) made a Discord and randomly invited me to it and made me admin (I had posted two messages to the group and didn't even know the kid). As it turns out, Peter was of the memeing, late-night shitposting kind. He had a particular taste for Reviewbrah, the kid who reviews fast food in a suit. I played along and he became attached really quick, and I liked him too.
One of my first experiences with Peter was when he found this awful Gmod series and jokingly made a fan Discord server for it. It attracted a decent bit of attention for a show that couldn't get more than a handful of views a video, including from the guys who made it themselves. At the end of the day, all Peter did was at them, some micspam and the usual unfunny shit, but we laughed about it then. No harm, no foul.
Then, as I mentioned, the Russian kid who ran the developer group started to ban a bunch of people for "spamming" and not allowing the server to remain a "professional environment", which of course, became a running joke of ours and a few other people who were in on it. "Garry's Mod? Professional?" we laughed. How silly. Thing about Peter, though, is that once the lulz dried up, he'd latch onto whoever he could suck from next, become a massive shithead, shit up the group chats, make you look bad, and then guilt you into thinking you were at fault. Alternatively, he'd become super apologetic as if that excuses his behavior. I am not the only one who has thought this; private correspondence with his old friends shows history repeating itself.
(Should reiterate, I didn't push for admin or any of this, but I really like talking to people, and the Russian kid was never around, so suddenly, I'm the figurehead of this tiny splinter off the fucking Garry's Mod Discord community. I'm barely active as a modder at this point and I can't really give a fuck one way or the other, but like I said, I enjoy talking to people and I have nothing better to do, so I stick around.)
So after some friends got banned, including Peter, everyone suggested I make a new server and run it instead, because I was the only active admin on there anyway. Yeah, sure, I thought, and I began to invite people from the old, dead server to the new, quite active one. I made one last push to destroy the old one for fun, had the Russian kid who ran it tell me he would personally make sure I never find work in the very prestigious Garry's Mod modding community ever again, and continued on with my life. Most of the people I ended up meeting were really interesting, creative people, and I'm glad I'm still talking to them. Peter, though, became antsy.
Peter became super manipulative; after he didn't get his way with roles or being told to keep his shit in the designated shitpost chat or something, suddenly, I was the same as the Russian kid! Just a massive control freak and egotist. I called him up, told him to show me where I had been a control freak...and his only response, after a good 10 minutes of digging and name-calling, was the chat where the Russian kid raged at me. The one Peter laughed at, I should add.
I have no real tolerance for bullshit, so after a back and forth, I banned him from the server, dropped him everywhere he has contact with me, only to have him crawling back an hour later, begging me and telling me how we can work it out. I'll give him points for being honest and saying I shouldn't try to reason with him, but also, you're a massive faggot, Peter. Stop shitting up my chat.
I'll drop some chatlogs here with the names removed if someone wants to stare in the face of some kind of Cluster B personality disorder:
Code:
[4:43 PM] Peter: All you did was run a gmod server
[4:43 PM] Peter: 1/1000 of them
[4:43 PM] Sergeant Politeness: and then i told you to move it to fucking
[4:43 PM] Sergeant Politeness: #shitpost
[4:43 PM] Sergeant Politeness: and you got salty
[4:43 PM] Peter: Okay
[4:43 PM] Peter: Well you should've moved this convo to modchat
[4:43 PM] Peter: But you didn't
[4:44 PM] Sergeant Politeness: you should've told me to, peter
[4:44 PM] Peter: Why?
[4:44 PM] Sergeant Politeness: if you're the king shit of fuck mountain
[4:44 PM] Sergeant Politeness: you run it
[4:44 PM] Peter: ok
[4:46 PM] Peter: This server's gonna go no where
[4:46 PM] Sergeant Politeness: good
[4:46 PM] Peter: It's going to die
[4:46 PM] Peter: You've put no effort into expanding like you said you would 4 times
[4:46 PM] Peter: You're egotistical
[4:46 PM] Sergeant Politeness: well first off, we said we'd give it a week, second, we still don't have a plan
[4:46 PM] Sergeant Politeness: note the language
[4:46 PM] Sergeant Politeness: we
[4:47 PM] Sergeant Politeness: that means you dumbass
[4:47 PM] Peter: Lmfao
[4:47 PM] Peter: Okay
[4:47 PM] Peter: Well I tried
[4:47 PM] Sergeant Politeness: yep, you tried
[4:47 PM] Peter: You didn't care
[4:47 PM] Sergeant Politeness: gold star for effort peter
[4:47 PM] Peter: I fixed up some of the chat
[4:47 PM] Peter: You're exactly like [Russian kid]
[4:47 PM] Sergeant Politeness: no one cares, it's just a gmod server, right
[4:47 PM] Sergeant Politeness: when did i ban anyone
[4:47 PM] Peter: You banned [Russian kid] from his own server
[4:48 PM] Sergeant Politeness: so i didn't
[4:48 PM] Sergeant Politeness: ha
[4:48 PM] Peter: Yeah you did
[4:48 PM] Sergeant Politeness: goodbye peter
[4:48 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i'm not responding after this
[4:48 PM] Peter: I know why you didn't like him
[4:48 PM] Peter: Because he gave you no power
[4:48 PM] Peter: And you're a control freak and need it
[4:48 PM] Peter: I've always said the Gmod community is cancer
[4:48 PM] Peter: I can now confirm
[4:49 PM] Peter: Because Sergeant Politeness is running it
Code:
[7:38 PM] Sergeant Politeness: okay but enough about him
[7:38 PM] Sergeant Politeness: let's talk us
[7:38 PM] Sergeant Politeness: do you say shit out of anger or something?
[7:38 PM] Peter: Yeah
[7:38 PM] Peter: I can't control it
[7:38 PM] Peter: So when I say something
[7:38 PM] Peter: Ignore me
[7:38 PM] Peter: I genuinely can't help it
[7:38 PM] Peter: I have anger problems
[7:38 PM] Peter: Or mute me
[7:38 PM] Sergeant Politeness: okay, now what do i do when you're shitting up my chat
[7:38 PM] Peter: I'll go listen to music
[7:39 PM] Peter: Mute me from talking in chat
[7:39 PM] Sergeant Politeness: and when you take it to steam?
[7:39 PM] Peter: I usually go listen to Alan Parsons and in an hour i'll be fine
[7:39 PM] Peter: Go offline
[7:39 PM] Sergeant Politeness: fine
[7:39 PM] Peter: Or just spam me
[7:39 PM] Peter: *dont say anything
[7:39 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i've said this from the beginning, i'm interested in de-escalation
[7:39 PM] Peter: I might stop
[7:39 PM] Peter: Yeah
[7:39 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i'm looking for what will get you to shut the fuck up the quickest
[7:40 PM] Peter: Link me memes or music
[7:41 PM] Peter: Or just ignore me
[7:41 PM] Peter: Never try to resolve it with me
[7:41 PM] Peter: I'll have to feel bad and come apologize to you
[7:41 PM] Sergeant Politeness: fine
[7:42 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i'm willing to overlook a lot of shit, and if i didn't have good reasons for doing shit, i might be best referred to as a doormat
[7:42 PM] Sergeant Politeness: but sure
[7:42 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i'll go with it
[7:42 PM] Peter: ty
I figure it's time for an update on mine. Peter pretty much hates me altogether now, yet he still sticks around for...some reason. I found out that apparently, he thinks there's a big cabal of his internet friends trying to get his brother to hate him and every few days, he actively goads me into banning him so he can call me a control freak, which is his main insult. I never do and he calls me that anyway, so I'm not sure what his point is.
Surprise surprise, no one likes him:
Code:
[2:05 PM] Friend of mine: He gets irrationally pissed sometimes
[2:05 PM] Friend of mine: I don't understand it
[2:06 PM] Sergeant Politeness: peter has paranoid delusions, as one of his friends and one of his ex-friends told me
[2:06 PM] Sergeant Politeness: both are in the chat
[2:06 PM] Sergeant Politeness: he thought there was a big cabal of his friends out to make his brother hate him irl
[2:07 PM] Friend of mine: ....that's weird
[2:07 PM] Friend of mine: Needs meds
[2:07 PM] Sergeant Politeness: get this
[2:07 PM] Sergeant Politeness: he was apparently worse a year ago
[2:08 PM] Sergeant Politeness: but that was the issue with [person a]
[2:08 PM] Sergeant Politeness: and he hates [person b] because he thought he was siding with [person a] after he leaked his picture to our chat
[2:08 PM] Sergeant Politeness: meanwhile, [person b] was like "i never sided with him, but peter wasn't right either"
[2:09 PM] Friend of mine: ...that all seems like childish.. stuff
[2:10 PM] Sergeant Politeness: it's really childish, but the issue with touching childish shit is that people think you're a child for touching it
[2:10 PM] Sergeant Politeness: but literally, i have two choices, mute peter or tell him to eat my shorts
[2:11 PM] Friend of mine: Both would work I guess
[2:11 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i did both
[2:12 PM] Sergeant Politeness: i mock him for being a sped and then i mute him when i get bored
[2:12 PM] Friend of mine: Haha
The current friend mentioned in the chat has also told me this:
Code:
[5:09 PM] Friend of Peter's: Peter is actually really mad at you right now
[5:09 PM] Friend of Peter's: He's calling you a control freak
[5:10 PM] Friend of Peter's: Says you don't listen
[5:10 PM] Friend of Peter's: He said he told you not to do that kind of stuff when he's angry and you still do it anyway
[5:10 PM] Sergeant Politeness: wait, so not stopping the dude immediately after is control freak behavior now?
[5:10 PM] Friend of Peter's: He's worked up
[5:10 PM] Friend of Peter's: Says you lied about [russian kid] doing nothing and made this server to take it over
[5:11 PM] Friend of Peter's: And I agreed with him just to not have him thinking I'm betraying him
[5:11 PM] Friend of Peter's: Because otherwise he will turn against me for no reason
[5:11 PM] Friend of Peter's: Don't worry about what he says
[5:11 PM] Friend of Peter's: He said the exact same thing to [person a] and one of my friends
I've got a lot of stories from DreamWidth, but I'm going to start with my personal favorite. As an introduction DreamWidth is a journal site similar to LiveJournal. It's mostly populated by roleplayers who migrated there after LiveJournal shat the bed in 2011. It very much harkens back to the LiveJournal days of fandom and has a very similar culture, and it skews age 25+. DreamWidth roleplay is especially notorious for a community called wankgate. Wankgate is an anonymous community where you're encouraged to post caps and pastebins of things other people are doing. Most of these caps and pastebins are from a social networking site called Plurk, which is popular with the DreamWidth crowd.
Wankgate is usually full of people whining about how someone isn't RPing their anime character properly or how the latest episode of Doctor Who let them down but occasionally you get some gold. I present to you the story of Het (real name Heather). Het is a roleplayer who was, at the time, playing their original character, Jayden. As it turned out, Jayden wasn't so original after all, but in fact based on something that already existed, by Het's own confession.
What was he based on? Sonic? Naruto? Nope. Jayden was based on the surviving Boston Bomber, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. Here is a pastebin of a plurk in which Het confesses this fact, as well as her devotion to Dzhokhar and the fact that she thinks he is completely innocent; a poor vulnerable boy manipulated by his brother. This comes out in a thread on wankgate (note: Mask or Menace is the name of the roleplay game she was playing Jayden at, a superhero-themed game with about 100 other players at that point), and then another thread specifically on Het soon follows.
She gets perma-banned from Mask or Menace as well as every other game she tries to bring Jayden to, effectively running her out of DreamWidth. As a bonus, characters that are dropped from Mask or Menace usually just disappear, but if the player wants they can write their own ending for the character. Het decided that Jayden moved to Boston.
Is that the end of Het? No, of course not. She runs a blog about the Dzhokhar which is still being updated on a regular basis. Here's a great post to get you started, and another.
A mentally ill german (well he is half morrocan) man on youtube named Mimon Baraka had the bad habit to share his life on youtube and now he is getting trolled constantly and he believes every single thing. The trolls made him believe that there is an organisation names NWO - new world order out to get him and that Drachenlord (an infamous german lolcow) is behind this.
He thinks the police, lawyers etc. are watching his videos and he called the police so often, that they blocked his calls. There is a video where he tries to speak english and tells his story:
This is true the only Zach I knew growing up dropped out of a fairly prestigious engineering school in order to become a drug addicted crust punk who OD in a public park.
back when I was a poorfag I used to take the bus to work, in the next town over - in the morning it typically took about 35 minutes, and near the end of the journey, a middle-aged guy often used to board the bus and act as my source of personal entertainment
I thought of him as Grumpy Graham, because he was relentlessly grumpy, and looked like a Graham: he worked in a bank, had tinted glasses and a blonde Brillo pad haircut, was always plugged into a portable music player, and if he buttoned his shirt all the way up, the fat under his chin would spill over the edge of his collar
he spent most of his ten-minute journey into town with a face on him like a warthog with prostate trouble, grumbling and muttering under his breath about the most minor traffic events, and providing unintentional entertainment in the process
if the bus was a double decker, he'd always sit on the top deck, at the very front (I'd usually be sat several rows behind) - he only ever muttered and grumbled when sat there, and on single deckers he was as quiet as a mouse
sometimes I'd take great joy in seeing other people get on before his stop and pinch 'his' seats at the front, particularly if it was a parent with a small child – because not only would it have annoyed him beyond reason, he couldn't have kicked off about it without looking like a massive wanker... but then he'd spoil it by not turning up
the station where the bus terminated (then turned round and headed back to my town) was roughly D-shaped, had a number of stands round the outer curve of the D and a number of extra stands on 'islands' in the centre: this particular bus would normally drop off passengers on the edge, then loop round to one of the islands and pick up outgoing passengers, but if the driver was running late, or there was a queue at the exit, or there were a lot of passengers to pick up, it would go straight to the island and let passengers alight there instead
when this happened, "Graham" would be utterly outraged and say something like "Twat!"; like all his reactions, it was hilariously out of proportion, and well worth the price of admission
"
at them, some micspam and the usual unfunny shit, but we laughed about it then. No harm, no foul.
