Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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Alan Pardew said:
Anyone in the mood for a Q&A (Or AMA: Ask Me Anything) for jin15?

http://www.redlightponyville.com/forums ... d-402.html

Here's some quotes and pictures:

""Which side of the bed do you sleep on?"
Sometimes a picture says more than words ever can ^_^
DSC00452b.jpg

"Three biggest turn ons and three biggest turn offs?"
Biggest Turn Ons : 1. Twilight Sparkle, 2. Various other ponies, 3. Chubby male humans with big butts
Biggest Turn Offs : 1. Skinny people, 2. Cologne/perfume, 3. Bad breath

Twixie: I've seen what you like to do to your plushie. *blushes*
But I"m more curious to know what you'd do with her if you were actually with the real pony. :3

Actually, the messy things I've done with brushable figures you've seen are things I'd never do with my Twilight plushie. I did cum on my plushie once and quickly learned that minky fabric is just insanely difficult to clean. I did manage to get her perfectly clean again, but it took about four and a half straight hours of careful meticulous cleaning work to do it. After that I swore I'd never get even so much as a drop of pre-cum on her again, and I've stuck to that. I do still make love to her a few times a week, but all that involves is cuddling and kissing her while I clop and rubbing my cock back and forth between her back legs while gently squeezing them together (you have no idea how good minky fabric feels against your skin if you've never tried it). I always pull her off me before I cum though (I like pulling her up onto my chest and kissing her while I cum) and I'm extremely careful about keeping her 100% spotlessly clean through the whole process.
So in spite of what you may have thought I actually am extremely careful about making sure my plushie never gets even the slightest bit dirty. ^_^

But to answer your actual question, what I'd do if I ever got to be with Twilight the real pony...
I'd definitely want to keep it very sweet, gentle, and romantic. I'd love to spend a good long time cuddling and kissing with her, stroking her mane and treating her very lovingly before we got to the actual sex. Once things got a bit more intimate I'd start off by laying her down on her back, kissing all the way down from her mouth, to her chest, then her tummy, and finally making my way down to her sweet purple and pink flower. I'd spend what would seem like a small eternity licking her out, pleasing her with my tongue as much as she wanted and making sure she came at least once before we took things any further. The challenging part would just be trying not to drool all over myself the entire time, as I'm sure she'd taste absolutely wonderful. Like lavender and honey with a hint of vanilla I've always imagined. I'd swallow and cherish every single drop of her sweet mare juice as she got wetter and wetter throughout the experience. I'd also love to slide my tongue down and twirl it around her plot hole here and there during my affectionate oral administrations, but whether or not I did would depend entirely on whether she enjoyed that or not. My primary goal the entire time would be nothing but bringing her as much pleasure as I possibly could. Whatever Twilight wanted she would get.

Once she had gotten all the licking she wanted it would be up to her what position she was in when I slid myself into her tight (but hopefully loosened just a touch from all the licking and her first orgasm of the night) little furnace of marehood. If she wanted to keep resting on her back so she could just lay back and enjoy it that would be wonderful, but I think I'd enjoy it the most if she decided to climb on top while I rested back so she could ride me at just the depth and speed that felt best for her. Either way I'd stare lovingly into her beautiful purple eyes the entire time, watching them glaze over with pleasure as we both worked each other closer and closer to climax. Then when the moment finally came I'd embrace her tightly in my arms, kiss her with the intensity of a thousand collapsing stars, and finally crumple down onto the bed together in a entertwined pile of spent sweat drenched pony and human. I'd lay there with her, still staring into her eyes, and whisper softly to her how wonderful she was. Enjoying the deep earthy scents of our love making still hanging heavily in the air. Running my fingers up and down her body in all the spots she loved the most and making her feel the most peaceful and content she's ever known, until we both drifted off to sleep together. And I would know bliss like few ever will.
I'll just let this picture from Know Your Meme sum up how I feel reading that Q&A
a65.jpg

Thought of using the My Little Pony picture since this is about a brony who loves Twilight much like how twilight fangirls love Edward or Jacob.
 
Also forgot to mention, if his favorite pony, Twilight, was reading that this would probably be here reaction since this would be the millionth brony who wants her china.
47509+-+computer+denied+hardware_abuse+no+punch+twilight_sparkle.jpg
 
Alan Pardew said:
Bridechu said:
I recently made an account to look into the lolcows of the "Ponyville Red Light" forum that the infamous jin15 (the pony plushie fucker) came from. Honestly, though, it's mostly just depressing. You've got a few genuine perverts, but mostly people with autism, anxiety disorders, and other actual social disabilities that are finding solace and coping mechanisms in cartoon ponies. A lot of them aren't even interested in sex, really, they just want a friend. It's too sad to be funny, because I guess I think "There but for the grace of Accutane and alcohol go I."

Still, if I ever see a neckbeard carrying around a plushie in public, I'm getting pics of that shit.

Anyone in the mood for a Q&A (Or AMA: Ask Me Anything) for jin15?

http://www.redlightponyville.com/forums ... d-402.html

Here's some quotes and pictures:

""Which side of the bed do you sleep on?"
Sometimes a picture says more than words ever can ^_^
DSC00452b.jpg

"Three biggest turn ons and three biggest turn offs?"
Biggest Turn Ons : 1. Twilight Sparkle, 2. Various other ponies, 3. Chubby male humans with big butts
Biggest Turn Offs : 1. Skinny people, 2. Cologne/perfume, 3. Bad breath

Twixie: I've seen what you like to do to your plushie. *blushes*
But I"m more curious to know what you'd do with her if you were actually with the real pony. :3

Actually, the messy things I've done with brushable figures you've seen are things I'd never do with my Twilight plushie. I did cum on my plushie once and quickly learned that minky fabric is just insanely difficult to clean. I did manage to get her perfectly clean again, but it took about four and a half straight hours of careful meticulous cleaning work to do it. After that I swore I'd never get even so much as a drop of pre-cum on her again, and I've stuck to that. I do still make love to her a few times a week, but all that involves is cuddling and kissing her while I clop and rubbing my cock back and forth between her back legs while gently squeezing them together (you have no idea how good minky fabric feels against your skin if you've never tried it). I always pull her off me before I cum though (I like pulling her up onto my chest and kissing her while I cum) and I'm extremely careful about keeping her 100% spotlessly clean through the whole process.
So in spite of what you may have thought I actually am extremely careful about making sure my plushie never gets even the slightest bit dirty. ^_^

But to answer your actual question, what I'd do if I ever got to be with Twilight the real pony...
I'd definitely want to keep it very sweet, gentle, and romantic. I'd love to spend a good long time cuddling and kissing with her, stroking her mane and treating her very lovingly before we got to the actual sex. Once things got a bit more intimate I'd start off by laying her down on her back, kissing all the way down from her mouth, to her chest, then her tummy, and finally making my way down to her sweet purple and pink flower. I'd spend what would seem like a small eternity licking her out, pleasing her with my tongue as much as she wanted and making sure she came at least once before we took things any further. The challenging part would just be trying not to drool all over myself the entire time, as I'm sure she'd taste absolutely wonderful. Like lavender and honey with a hint of vanilla I've always imagined. I'd swallow and cherish every single drop of her sweet mare juice as she got wetter and wetter throughout the experience. I'd also love to slide my tongue down and twirl it around her plot hole here and there during my affectionate oral administrations, but whether or not I did would depend entirely on whether she enjoyed that or not. My primary goal the entire time would be nothing but bringing her as much pleasure as I possibly could. Whatever Twilight wanted she would get.

Once she had gotten all the licking she wanted it would be up to her what position she was in when I slid myself into her tight (but hopefully loosened just a touch from all the licking and her first orgasm of the night) little furnace of marehood. If she wanted to keep resting on her back so she could just lay back and enjoy it that would be wonderful, but I think I'd enjoy it the most if she decided to climb on top while I rested back so she could ride me at just the depth and speed that felt best for her. Either way I'd stare lovingly into her beautiful purple eyes the entire time, watching them glaze over with pleasure as we both worked each other closer and closer to climax. Then when the moment finally came I'd embrace her tightly in my arms, kiss her with the intensity of a thousand collapsing stars, and finally crumple down onto the bed together in a entertwined pile of spent sweat drenched pony and human. I'd lay there with her, still staring into her eyes, and whisper softly to her how wonderful she was. Enjoying the deep earthy scents of our love making still hanging heavily in the air. Running my fingers up and down her body in all the spots she loved the most and making her feel the most peaceful and content she's ever known, until we both drifted off to sleep together. And I would know bliss like few ever will.

hDgvcyb.jpg


What in the name of Christopher Christian Weston Chandler did I just read?
 
Alan Pardew said:
Bridechu said:
I recently made an account to look into the lolcows of the "Ponyville Red Light" forum that the infamous jin15 (the pony plushie fucker) came from. Honestly, though, it's mostly just depressing. You've got a few genuine perverts, but mostly people with autism, anxiety disorders, and other actual social disabilities that are finding solace and coping mechanisms in cartoon ponies. A lot of them aren't even interested in sex, really, they just want a friend. It's too sad to be funny, because I guess I think "There but for the grace of Accutane and alcohol go I."

Still, if I ever see a neckbeard carrying around a plushie in public, I'm getting pics of that shit.

Anyone in the mood for a Q&A (Or AMA: Ask Me Anything) for jin15?

http://www.redlightponyville.com/forums ... d-402.html

Here's some quotes and pictures:

""Which side of the bed do you sleep on?"
Sometimes a picture says more than words ever can ^_^
DSC00452b.jpg

"Three biggest turn ons and three biggest turn offs?"
Biggest Turn Ons : 1. Twilight Sparkle, 2. Various other ponies, 3. Chubby male humans with big butts
Biggest Turn Offs : 1. Skinny people, 2. Cologne/perfume, 3. Bad breath

Twixie: I've seen what you like to do to your plushie. *blushes*
But I"m more curious to know what you'd do with her if you were actually with the real pony. :3

Actually, the messy things I've done with brushable figures you've seen are things I'd never do with my Twilight plushie. I did cum on my plushie once and quickly learned that minky fabric is just insanely difficult to clean. I did manage to get her perfectly clean again, but it took about four and a half straight hours of careful meticulous cleaning work to do it. After that I swore I'd never get even so much as a drop of pre-cum on her again, and I've stuck to that. I do still make love to her a few times a week, but all that involves is cuddling and kissing her while I clop and rubbing my cock back and forth between her back legs while gently squeezing them together (you have no idea how good minky fabric feels against your skin if you've never tried it). I always pull her off me before I cum though (I like pulling her up onto my chest and kissing her while I cum) and I'm extremely careful about keeping her 100% spotlessly clean through the whole process.
So in spite of what you may have thought I actually am extremely careful about making sure my plushie never gets even the slightest bit dirty. ^_^

But to answer your actual question, what I'd do if I ever got to be with Twilight the real pony...
I'd definitely want to keep it very sweet, gentle, and romantic. I'd love to spend a good long time cuddling and kissing with her, stroking her mane and treating her very lovingly before we got to the actual sex. Once things got a bit more intimate I'd start off by laying her down on her back, kissing all the way down from her mouth, to her chest, then her tummy, and finally making my way down to her sweet purple and pink flower. I'd spend what would seem like a small eternity licking her out, pleasing her with my tongue as much as she wanted and making sure she came at least once before we took things any further. The challenging part would just be trying not to drool all over myself the entire time, as I'm sure she'd taste absolutely wonderful. Like lavender and honey with a hint of vanilla I've always imagined. I'd swallow and cherish every single drop of her sweet mare juice as she got wetter and wetter throughout the experience. I'd also love to slide my tongue down and twirl it around her plot hole here and there during my affectionate oral administrations, but whether or not I did would depend entirely on whether she enjoyed that or not. My primary goal the entire time would be nothing but bringing her as much pleasure as I possibly could. Whatever Twilight wanted she would get.

Once she had gotten all the licking she wanted it would be up to her what position she was in when I slid myself into her tight (but hopefully loosened just a touch from all the licking and her first orgasm of the night) little furnace of marehood. If she wanted to keep resting on her back so she could just lay back and enjoy it that would be wonderful, but I think I'd enjoy it the most if she decided to climb on top while I rested back so she could ride me at just the depth and speed that felt best for her. Either way I'd stare lovingly into her beautiful purple eyes the entire time, watching them glaze over with pleasure as we both worked each other closer and closer to climax. Then when the moment finally came I'd embrace her tightly in my arms, kiss her with the intensity of a thousand collapsing stars, and finally crumple down onto the bed together in a entertwined pile of spent sweat drenched pony and human. I'd lay there with her, still staring into her eyes, and whisper softly to her how wonderful she was. Enjoying the deep earthy scents of our love making still hanging heavily in the air. Running my fingers up and down her body in all the spots she loved the most and making her feel the most peaceful and content she's ever known, until we both drifted off to sleep together. And I would know bliss like few ever will.

[youtube]7r9olmTvmHI[/youtube]
 
Most social justice warriors on Tumblr. I'm for treating people like equals no matter their background, but they seem to be for attacking every white, cisgendered, thin, and/or male person on the planet, as well as everyone who doesn't kiss their ass or acknowledge them as the winners of the oppression olympics. In other words, minni Chris-Chans.
 
Equality isn't equality when its one-sided. Terrence Howard is becoming my personal lolcow; he's recently claimed that not reprising his role in Iron-Man 2 killed his career.
 
Cyan said:
Most social justice warriors on Tumblr. I'm for treating people like equals no matter their background, but they seem to be for attacking every white, cisgendered, thin, and/or male person on the planet, as well as everyone who doesn't kiss their ass or acknowledge them as the winners of the oppression olympics. In other words, minni Chris-Chans.

The fact that they have internet access makes them pretty privileged I'd say.
 
There was this kid I knew in elementary school, let's call him Kyle, he was so fun to mess around with because we were little shits in elementary school. He'd start to scream and complain if you did anything that he didn't like or got to something that he wanted. Like if you were at free time and you happened to get to the computer first, he'd start to complain about how you stole the computer from him, even if you just got there before him. (That's not to say people didn't rush to the computer) He also was BIG into Sonic and during PE when we ran the lap, he'd run like Sonic. He'd lean forward and run with his arms trailing behind him. He also took everything literally. One time in PE we were playing soccer (really just having two kids one being a goalie and the other the guy trying to get goal) and the kid who was the goalie pretended to get knocked out by the ball, so then Kyle tried to give him CPR.

Luckily, Kyle grew out of this phase by middle school, so no lolcow anymore for him.
 
Back in the way-back-when, I used to lurk Portal of Evil. (Does anyone remember this place? Basically it was a forum to display various bizarre websites. This was back before internet culture was really a thing.) Anyway, there was a page on this girl who was obsessed with the Monkees, in particular Peter Tork. Like, she would write about having psychic links with him or some shit, she'd email extremely lengthy prose to him, and I'm pretty sure she wrote or hosted a lot of slash fanfiction of the Monkees. Some drama went down on Portal of Evil when someone she knew posted a ton of crazy stories about her (like she was literally psychotic). I would go back to the page every now and then to see if she ever grew out of it - the last I saw of it she actually met Peter Tork, posted the pictures, and implied they had sex. Truth or not, I'm sure somewhere a 70 year old former teen idol has a restraining order against some psycho pushing thirty.

The internet has always been a weird place.
 
sparklemilhouse said:
:O I have an online friend who is kinda crazy over the Monkees too.
Do they want to bang them? Because the Monkees were great, but damn.
 
sparklemilhouse said:
:O I have an online friend who is kinda crazy over the Monkees too.

In high school one of my friends was into them. I like their later stuff before the break-up, when they got some semblance of control.

My favorite's Peter, but I don't have a psychic connection with him or anything. I guess I'm not psychic enough. I do have a psychic connection with Vanilla Ice, though. Make it stop! Please bother someone else Ice! Please!


Kidding.
 
Rightly Concerned douchebag said:
Dads against daughters dating?

There's a new t-shirt, a couple of new books out on the subject and a movement that goes beyond the bookstores pushing the concept.

But say what you want, it is an idea whose time once was, and needs to be renewed. Dating is a lousy idea. Somewhere along the line in the early to middle twentieth century culture decided that young couples pairing off and discovering fuller (actually, far shallower) meanings and implications of sexuality was a good idea.

The concept of courtship is winning out in the minds of a growing number of evangelical parents. Here is the basic, if woefully brief, brief - let Dads in particular and parents in general be on the lookout for mates for their daughters. Pray long and hard. Trust in God. If a guy takes an interest in your gal, he works through Dad first, not Dad later. Courtship is done with the purpose of marriage in mind, so it is not done lightly. Precious little physical contact prior to marriage. First kiss ought to be at the wedding altar. Time alone with the opposite sex ought to be limited.

You get the gist. It works out differently for different families. But for all those wondering which planet these practitioners of courtship are from one would be hard-pressed to suggest that dating as a norm has worked out well Christians since we began participating in this now-cultural norm unthinkingly.

Only one problem with the T-shirt. Mine reads "Dads-Against-Sons-Dating, Too." I have five of those "sons."
ಠ_ಠ
I don't like you. I'd say I hope you never have kids, but it looks like its far too late for that.
 
Where did you find this gem?
 
Surtur said:
Where did you find this gem?
Some site called Rightly Concerned, it looks like a typical fundie site.
 
By the gods...
 
I've heard of this kind of thing before. They force their daughters to promise to basically have no parental (daddy) approved relationships, and especially no sex, and do this when they are very young. It must be terrible if these girls grow up and decide to think for themselves (though it's unlikely since they seem to be brainwashed).
 
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