Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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Since Year 7 i've had to contend with this son-of-a-bitch whom I shall call DickGobbler. The first thing I'll note about him is his effeminate, high-pitched voice and condescending tone which he uses to gaslight anyone who calls him out on his bullshit. He speaks to everyone younger and/or shorter than him (To this day he subconsciously thinks of his lankiness as requisite for authority) as though he's speaking to some retarded toddler. But when he annoys a teacher directly he adopts a submissive stance, hands covering his mouth, and does the puppy dog eyes, on the brink of tears. He never apologizes for his actions but instead ingratiates himself in the face of authority. DickGobbler is the most pathetic, amoral cunt of a man I have had the displeasure of encountering in meatspace, and I would not be surprised, nor would I be in any way disappointed, if he gets in trouble with the law one of these days.

His most distinctive trait, perhaps, was his disregard for other's privacy combined and obsession for gathering other people's personal information. Zero respect, for anyone, unless he was scared out of his shit. I was eleven years old when he looked through everyone's school diary and memorized everyone's emails and phone numbers, not to mention their addresses. That day I was totally unprepared for what was to come. After the weekends, DickGobbler had looked up everyone's houses on google maps and printed some of them out, including mine.

And he didn't stop there. He looked up everyone's pages on facebook and followed all their family members. You see, the only thing that DickGobbler is proud of is his monumental memory as something he is proud of, as a way to assert his dominance on everyone else. He probably knows my entire genealogy (An astounding feat, considering my East Asian heritage). He regularly went up to people and straight-up told them things he learned from their family member's facebook profiles for no reason except to make himself look smart. He especially liked talking about my sister. This gave him an ego trip. And when it did his face contorted into a hideous grin, with beady eyes that expressed nothing but egotistical self-satisfaction.

DickGobbler has never taken anything said to him to heart. He views everyone around him as a potential source of entertainment. The concept of a reputation is so beyond him he'd constantly ask paternalistic and intimate questions about things that don't concern him at lunchtime from someone who told him to fuck off at interval. (For the last goddamn time, DickGobbler, I haven't learned to drive. I'm one year younger than you. I might be a baby, but at least I don't fail half my internals, you precocious imbecile. Get a hobby.) It was almost as though he was trying to be everyone's mother by infantilizing anyone shorter than him, implicitly or explicitly.

He is insufferably smug. He likes scrutinizing certain people's behaviour so he can arrogantly nitpick them. Whenever I made a minor mistake he tilts his head back and croons to me like he's the adult in the room. Then snitches about it to the teacher, who gave zero fucks because I wasn't disrupting anyone. He learned everything about human interaction from British children's media. At least it wasn't anime. He regularly quoted Horrid Henry and Home Alone whenever he felt the need to assert his paternalism.

Also, he liked talking about the humiliating things he wished he'd do to his sisters. Sometimes sexual, other times violent.

For some reason he was above the school rules. He got away with everything like a moral houdini. He once groped a girl in the locker bay yet he got off scotfree and bragged about it. I don't know who his parents are blowing to give him this kind of immunity but I wouldn't be surprised if it were someone on the Board of Trustees. Seriously, what kind of mental disorder does he have to have to be this unaccountable for his actions?

I have heard very little from him as of late. But when I was in year 12, he forgot it was Mufti Day (It's when you wear casual clothes to school instead of the uniform). And by interval my friends who were unfortunate enough to share classes with him told me he went apeshit. He called his parents eight times, disregarding the fact that they work at the opposite side of town and it takes them two hours to drive to there. Then his phone got confiscated before interval. He threw a goddamn fit. While my friends were telling me about what happened, he skipped across the field, flapping his arms, making a teeth-gritting, eyes-closed face like there were flies up his ass, wailed "I FUCKING HATE MY DAD!!!"
 
I am friends with a family of white trash rednecks who live around me. Usually I ignore them when they contact me, but occasionally I'll let them talk to me to laugh at the retarded things they do. Here is a non comprehensive list.

1. Dropping their 12 year old daughter out of school to try and get engaged to a 16 year old guy.
2. Secretly recording one of the twilight movies in theaters and several years later still using that shitty cam footage to watch it.
3. having a tree collapse on their house and just ignoring it because it didn't completely smash the roof.
4. buying 4 Xbox ones "just in case".
5. Being to exceptional for welfare, so they instead have a complex chain of baby daddies to get money.
6. Owning a violent pit bull who attacks people that visit them. also letting that dog piss in their beds.
7. Using an Industrial air conditioner they "Found" cool their house.
 
Cat Menagerie said:
Joe Exotic, gay polyamorous former tiger zoo operator and fringe political candidate. Someone posted a thread about him in the past, but I think it died in PG. He is slated to be fully inactive, since he was arrested on federal charges of attempted murder by hire and also killing tigers in his "care." Here's the latest about this piece of work:

http://www.newson6.com/story/39666223/feds-exzookeeper-offered-cash-from-tiger-sales-for-hit

His Twitter, still up and I believe archived but I'll do it again for good measure.

https://mobile.twitter.com/joe_exotic?lang=en

http://archive.li/5hjwH

His Faceberg, still up, not sure who posts to it now but I'm guessing it's his husband. I will attempt to archive it as well.

https://m.facebook.com/joethetigerking/

http://archive.fo/beywv

He really had it in for the CEO of Big Cat Rescue, who is the person he attempted to have murdered. Fortunately the FBI caught wind of it, so they have all the evidence in the world to put his sorry ass away for the next 20+ years.
Click to expand...

We need a thread on him asap lol. Netflix is releasing a 7 episode documentary called Tiger King about his antics.
 
Swiss46 said:
I am friends with a family of white trash rednecks who live around me. Usually I ignore them when they contact me, but occasionally I'll let them talk to me to laugh at the exceptional things they do. Here is a non comprehensive list.

1. Dropping their 12 year old daughter out of school to try and get engaged to a 16 year old guy.
2. Secretly recording one of the twilight movies in theaters and several years later still using that shitty cam footage to watch it.
3. having a tree collapse on their house and just ignoring it because it didn't completely smash the roof.
4. buying 4 Xbox ones "just in case".
5. Being to exceptional for welfare, so they instead have a complex chain of baby daddies to get money.
6. Owning a violent pit bull who attacks people that visit them. also letting that dog piss in their beds.
7. Using an Industrial air conditioner they "Found" cool their house.
Click to expand...
Are you sure they're not gypsies? This sounds very much like gypsy/pikey behaviour to me.
 
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Apparently my home town is a breeding ground for lolcows.

A friend of mine worked as a delivery driver and in his time he saw
  1. A house with baby shoes nailed to the siding.
  2. The inbred hillbillies on the edge of town. (Physical deformity and mental problems included.)
  3. A rotting deer head hanging above the door of a house​
Two Lolcows I have interacted with.

Burlesque dancer that told me society needed to censor rape jokes. Then her posts supporting sex workers got censored for not meeting community guidelines. Last I saw she was lamenting that Warren had dropped out of the race.

Then there was T. In high school he was a chronic liar. I don't have any stories from that time because I must have blocked them out. I do remember a friend invited T to play D&D only for the mother fucker to start taking 2nd edition D&D books out of his book bag. He had apparently been walking around with them in case a game broke out.

Anyway, we graduate and T goes into the army. A few years later my friends had all moved away so I figured I would try hanging out with T because the army should have fixed him.

It didn't. Claims he is part of the "investigation unit" of the army. (There is an acronym I can't think of it right now.) He's taking part in drug busts. Claims he had a 40k army. Bunch of stuff. He wants to hang out everyday.

This goes on for a few months then he just goes radio silent. I get a text from his ex-girlfriend. She is asking me if I have talked to him.

I tell her no. Supposedly T had borrowed her son's PS2 and lent it to me. This made no sense as I owned a PS2. I think she asked if I could check outside as if T had buried it in a hole outside.

Anyway she then proceeds to tell me that he broke up her marriage and all this other stuff that I couldn't be bothered with because I just wanted to be done with it.

Granted it sounds horrible but we still laugh because this shit is so ridiculous.
 
mine would have to be my sister. she has been into abdl for YEARS, openly talking to me about it even when i was underage. she's constantly roleplaying age play and talking about it as if i care. other than that all she does is talk on discord about yaoi and play the sims.
shes borderline death fat and it doesn't help thats shes genuinely a shitty person too
 
For context, I live in the sticks. There's some kind of college scam - not sure if it's a county thing or state-wide but I think the latter - where kids out of high school get sold on becoming Criminal Justice Majors. They're provided all kinds of loans and grants, shipped off to college with no help from anyone on teaching them how to be adults. Their 'college path' is riddled with pitfalls that disqualify them from continuing in the program, after which Somebody Else pockets their grant money. Because of this most of them wash out in short order and return home with a deep distrust of the higher educational system and not much else.

Not so much Frankie.

Before Frankie went away to college he was pretty much a stereotypical high school stoner with a touch of Dunning-Kruger syndrome, but he was pretty nice and honest (which is rare in the sticks). When Frankie came back, despite having flunked out he was convinced he knew everything about everything and that he was just inches away from being a crushing success at life. He was gonna join the military and learn how to be a Contractor and make millions. He was "going to go away for a while in just a couple months" for about 2 years. His recruiter finally told him to fuck off. He does not consider this a serious setback and still claims he's going to join the army in a couple months, despite the fact that the army hasn't contacted him in half a year and counting. During this time he got hired by McDonalds. He joked about being 'down with the clown' about 5 times before it quit being funny and then around 500 times afterwards. Then he got fired from after stating "They need to know that they need me more than I need them" and ditching work for 3 days. They reduced his hours to 8 per week, at which point he quit and informed everyone that it was McDonald's loss.

In between his military work and his contractor work, he has stated his intention to reinvent the entire music scene by mixing prog metal with rap. He can't read sheet music and hasn't had a music lesson since singing in elementary school. He said that all he needed was passion. I told him the anecdote about how Zakk Wylde's 'passion' for music was practicing guitar from the time he got home from school until it was time to go to school the next day, this just got a blank stare followed by him continuing to bang on about how smart he was.

Then he was somehow going to make millions weedeating. Like he was going to buy a fleet of weedeaters and drive all over the state weedeating people's Back 40. That lasted until his weedeater broke and he got paid nothing on the job he'd started. He's still going to make millions weedeating, he just has to get his weedeater fixed first, even though he has no money to repair it and no drivers license to take it to a repairman. This is not a major setback according to him.

The thing that made him intolerable though, is that his honest streak turned into a Lisa Simpson style holier-than-thou streak. He turned into the kind of person who spies on other people out a window to wait for them to do something he can tattle on, after which he proudly brags about how he SIMPLY CANNOT ABIDE SUCH BEHAVIOR and how wonderful he is for being willing to call it out when he sees it.

And the part where he's convinced he's a total ladies man, tells his life story to every girl he sees, then mistakes her polite disinterest for enthusiastic interest. But if she tells him to fuck off, he's also delighted because she's playing hard to get. Unless she has a boyfriend. Any girl with a boyfriend who makes eye contact with him without immediately dumping her boyfriend for him is a cocktease (and if she refuses to look at him she's a cunt).

The part that makes this sad is that Frankie actually came to the realization that if all of his friends were leaving him, his behavior must be the problem, and he made a half-hearted attempt to make up to everyone, only to forget what he was doing and start in on what he SIMPLY CANNOT ABIDE, and how it's nothing personal but he, Franklin, simply needs to take better care of himself and his needs and cannot continue being friends with a bunch of redneck potheads. Of course he didn't give up marijuana himself, he's just using it for the RIGHT reasons.
 
flubbles said:
mine would have to be my sister. she has been into abdl for YEARS, openly talking to me about it even when i was underage. she's constantly roleplaying age play and talking about it as if i care. other than that all she does is talk on discord about yaoi and play the sims.
shes borderline death fat and it doesn't help thats shes genuinely a shitty person too
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what
and you haven't tipped her over?!

get the fuck out and don't come back until she's "fallen" and can't get up
 
Mr. 0 said:
what
and you haven't tipped her over?!

get the fuck out and don't come back until she's "fallen" and can't get up
Click to expand...
to be fair, i haven't really interacted with her in years because of this shit, i was just forced to when we were younger.

she'd be worthy of a page if she did more than just post shitty fan fiction online
 
Not sure if this counts but, I have to say that my mother is one of these at points. I told her that I have to get art supplies at Blink for a school project and that I would have to take the PATH train (I'm in Jersey not NYC) and that I have to wipe my phone every time I return from outside because she thinks that I will get the coronavirus automatically but at the same time telling me that I can ride the bus with the mask on and that I don't have to wear the mask outside and also thinks that everytime that I cough, she has a vietnam flashback thinking that I have contacted it and tends to gets angry whenever I even mention taking the PATH Train ever since this coronavirus shit started happening in the US. She is a hardcore germaphobe and born again Christian. She had a near hour talk about how I have to obey god and some shit about going to hell. Also acts more or less like a toned down 90s kid esque single black mother that start quoting a bunch of random shit she likes to watch after yelling at me and just acting whiny at points and never taking any real accountability for it. One time, I was very depressed about school and stuff and she tried to comfort me. She made a parallel to a movie to my situation and I respectfully said that I didn't really feel comfortable about paralleling my situation to what happened in a movie and she had a straight outburst about it.

Like I love her and she has done a lot of good things for me but dear fucking god does she pisses me her.
 
Since someone decided to be a faggot and go post this comment to his YouTube video I'm removing my comment for now. Fucking hell, there was ZERO REASON to do that.
 
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SpeedOSanicRee said:
This is his most-viewed video, so you can get a feel for why I felt he belonged here.
youtu.be

Tandrew Reacts : Cars 3 Trailer Reaction

This is not owned by me this is only my reaction! Check out the trailer yourself here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suv-5HOi6pc&index=85&list=WL ---------...
youtu.be youtu.be
Click to expand...
Oh man, that video was great.
  • Intro was more impressive than the Movie Maker intro I was expecting, but it’s literally just zooming in and out on his logo from various angles. I didn’t even realise there was supposed to be a T at the front of his name.
  • He looks like Gary Brolsma’s downie younger brother.
  • Mic’s so quiet I can’t even hear his voice over the trailer.
  • He gets soy face from a car accelerating.
  • “I don’t even remember the second one.” Then why the fuck are you getting so excited over this one?
Yeah, I can see why this guy only has 200 subscribers and gets single digit views on most of his videos.
 
TheImportantFart said:
Oh man, that video was great.
  • Intro was more impressive than the Movie Maker intro I was expecting, but it’s literally just zooming in and out on his logo from various angles. I didn’t even realise there was supposed to be a T at the front of his name.
  • He looks like Gary Brolsma’s downie younger brother.
  • Mic’s so quiet I can’t even hear his voice over the trailer.
  • He gets soy face from a car accelerating.
  • “I don’t even remember the second one.” Then why the fuck are you getting so excited over this one?
Yeah, I can see why this guy only has 200 subscribers and gets single digit views on most of his videos.
Click to expand...
He didn't even do his own intro. He has an editor for his intros and has an editor for his 'channel introduction' video (who, BTW, does passable, but not great, work in all of his projects), but I think he edits his own videos. Oh, and when he's in charge of the intro (in earlier videos), it IS a Movie Maker intro.

Also, he not only gets soy face from cars, he decided soy face was the best possible thumbnail.

I feel like there are some definitive things he could change to improve the quality of his videos (big one being sound mixing), but you can't really cure some of his mannerisms. He doesn't even play off of his autism and awknardness (which I've seen be done well), but seems to hope they're not noticeable.
 
My SO's crazy boss has been trying to get him fired for the past 4 months. The higher-ups don't seem to care, and during this past week all of the current employees have been interviewed by an ethics group outside of the company. During this entire shit show I've learned what a colossal cow my SO's boss really is. We'll call her Cunterella, because she wants everyone to think that her life is nothing but work and hardships. If you're entertained by the lies burped up Chantal/Foodie Beauty then you may find this entertaining.

I'm drunk and grumpy so I'm gonna tell you all about this fat lying miserable landmass.

Cunterella used to work at a place that we'll call KillMe, because the company is that awful. After lying out of her ass on her resume, she was hired at one of KillMe's factories in a different state. No one knows the real story, but according to her a machine broke and resulted in 150 degree Fahrenheit water filling her boots. I don't believe it was the machine's fault, I do believe it was her fault due to laziness and negligence. She was hospitalized and was later given a desk job. Months later, she was sent to my state to open up a new KillMe factory, and after the first round of employees were hired, she confided in a few of them that she had no idea how to work the equipment. She told some convincing sob story, and the employees (my SO among them) helped her and agreed not to say anything. Cunterella is the kind of person who will boohoo for help, but before you're even finished explaining the thing to her she'll start explaining it to you. She becomes an expert on all sorts of things in a matter of minutes or even seconds. Someone should have tattled on her that day, it may of ended her reign of terror.

Fast forward a few years, my SO gets a new job at a new place, and not long after that Cunterella is hired on as a manager. How the hell is she a manager now? Couldn't possibly be because everyone believed her lying ass resume, right? Apparently all of the higher-ups at this company, we'll call it LessAwful, are also re-tards. Between KillMe and LessAwful, Cunterella worked a lot of jobs, and not because she was climbing the ladder to success. She would get angry when she couldn't lie her way to a more cushion-y position and would leave without notice after a few days or a few weeks. I looked up a few of her previous places of employment on Google and Glassdoor and customers and coworkers alike have both addressed her by name when complaining. No one likes this bitch, her lies and laziness are recognized, yet she's never fired. But she's trying real damn hard to fire my SO. She's claimed he has behaved in ways that "threatened" her, like raising his voice when one of his coworkers can't hear him over all the noise on the main floor. So if you've ever been threatened by a crazy client with a knife, held at gunpoint, or followed home by a loony customer, just know that your hardships are nothing compared to Cunterella's. Loud voices on a giant fucking factory floor hurts her feefees.

This might sound like a load of BS, but my SO has brought home multiple trophies, accolades, hand-written letters of thanks from HQ, and gift cards during his time with LessAwful. I never even knew of these acknowledgements and praises unless there were suddenly trophies and letters sitting on the dining table. My SO is a man of few words, he gives people the benefit of the doubt (which has obviously not worked out), and he hates being in the spotlight. He's caught mistakes that have saved the company tens of thousands of dollars multiple times, and he never talks about it. It's Cunterella's job to catch those mistakes, but when she's not doing her job she's off doing who knows what else. Life is a struggle for this woman, and she wants you to know it. She has a cluster of various chronic conditions and allergies... when it's convenient for her. This chaps my ass because one of the conditions she claims to suffer from is one I live with. There's no cure, there's no go-to medicines that are guaranteed to help, and some of those medications are crazy expensive. She set up her office to "help" with triggers of this condition, but no one is going to believe you have an invisible illness when you're office is Yankee Candle Company meets the bedding section of Bed Bad & Beyond. This bitch is lighting candles and taking naps. And those privacy blinds for her sensitive eyes because the lighting on the main work floor is just too bright? My ass.

Speaking of sensitive eyes, her lies range from stupid to hilarious. One week she forgot that she was telling the same lie for 5 days in a row. She told everyone she was leaving early to pick up her glasses. Five times. She does not even wear glasses. Her lies usually involve her supposedly autistic son. I'm guessing he's just socially re.tarded because his mom is a morbidly obese lying clusterfuck of a human. My favorite lie was when she left after 2 hours because she had to, and several workers have quoted, "Go to the school to sign autism papers." She literally said she had to go sign "autism papers" as proof that her son is autistic. How does anyone come up with such a hilarious and terrible lie? She also lies religiously about being allergic to citrus. She chugs some kind of flavored fizzy "diet" water that has citric acid listed as the second ingredient. Fatty isn't allergic to citrus. I probably shouldn't call her Fatty, though. She has lost weight! She's been working from home during the pandemic and runs on the treadmill during her breaks. It's not because she lied to get pills that have the negative side effect of rapid weight loss.

Cunterella is one of those people who paints a different portrait of herself and her life depending on who she is interacting with. Her coworkers get a mix of truths and lies, her personal Facebook page gets all lies, and her private group for selling nail stickers gets the truth. For example, much like Chantal she brags about dumb shit that happened in her teen years and early twenties, like how she fucked her sister's boyfriend and married him. Her sister is a disabled army veteran. At one point her sister was living with her, and Cunterella kicked her out because, "as a babysitter, she has limits." No shit you miserable fatsack, she's disabled from having a bomb blow up underneath her. Cunterella tells these stories to her coworkers as if they're uplifting, hilarious, loving, and normal. But on her Facebook page, she spams those painfully generic images littered with neon pink hearts and sparkles that talk about love, acceptance, forgiveness, and don't forget that she loves her sister dearly, and that she's so sorry she isn't living with them anymore, and that she'll do anything for her cherished ones.

So, you may be wondering why she's trying to get my SO fired if my SO has been the one saving LessAwful nearly 100k in less than a year? We have no idea. My best guess is that she's afraid he'll reveal her for being a crazy lying bitch. And yes, he is trying to do that now, but only because she tried to fire him multiple times over literally nothing. My question is why corporate doesn't care more. Some employees are guessing that she's told different lies about her totally not fake health conditions that have them scared to fire her, and at the worst they'll ship her off to another location. I don't have faith worth a damn in corporations, I've worked for plenty and had my soul sucked dry, but this bitch has literally spent months of her life showing up to work just to try and get my SO fried. She's trying so hard to collect dirt on him, privately interviewing the other employees about him, handing out notes asking if he's done anything like sexually harass the female employees, and other juvenile re.tarded nonsense. It seems like someone at HQ would eventually snap after getting dozens of phone calls a day from this whiny fatass who has no proof of her claims and, oh, yeah, never does her job.

Night shift and day shift have now banned together to to try and get her fired. 4 or 5 people are monitoring her social media activity and screencapping and archiving everything, 2 months ago one person started writing down what time she would leave and her excuses, and as I said at the beginning everyone is coopering with the ethics group. It must be nice for Cunterella to "work" from home during the pandemic while the employees who do the actual work still have go to to their 12 hour shifts. Now she doesn't have to fry her tiny pea brain thinking of excuses to leave early!
 
BhertMern said:
My SO's crazy boss has been trying to get him fired for the past 4 months. The higher-ups don't seem to care, and during this past week all of the current employees have been interviewed by an ethics group outside of the company. During this entire shit show I've learned what a colossal cow my SO's boss really is. We'll call her Cunterella, because she wants everyone to think that her life is nothing but work and hardships. If you're entertained by the lies burped up Chantal/Foodie Beauty then you may find this entertaining.

I'm drunk and grumpy so I'm gonna tell you all about this fat lying miserable landmass.

Cunterella used to work at a place that we'll call KillMe, because the company is that awful. After lying out of her ass on her resume, she was hired at one of KillMe's factories in a different state. No one knows the real story, but according to her a machine broke and resulted in 150 degree Fahrenheit water filling her boots. I don't believe it was the machine's fault, I do believe it was her fault due to laziness and negligence. She was hospitalized and was later given a desk job. Months later, she was sent to my state to open up a new KillMe factory, and after the first round of employees were hired, she confided in a few of them that she had no idea how to work the equipment. She told some convincing sob story, and the employees (my SO among them) helped her and agreed not to say anything. Cunterella is the kind of person who will boohoo for help, but before you're even finished explaining the thing to her she'll start explaining it to you. She becomes an expert on all sorts of things in a matter of minutes or even seconds. Someone should have tattled on her that day, it may of ended her reign of terror.

Fast forward a few years, my SO gets a new job at a new place, and not long after that Cunterella is hired on as a manager. How the hell is she a manager now? Couldn't possibly be because everyone believed her lying ass resume, right? Apparently all of the higher-ups at this company, we'll call it LessAwful, are also re-tards. Between KillMe and LessAwful, Cunterella worked a lot of jobs, and not because she was climbing the ladder to success. She would get angry when she couldn't lie her way to a more cushion-y position and would leave without notice after a few days or a few weeks. I looked up a few of her previous places of employment on Google and Glassdoor and customers and coworkers alike have both addressed her by name when complaining. No one likes this bitch, her lies and laziness are recognized, yet she's never fired. But she's trying real damn hard to fire my SO. She's claimed he has behaved in ways that "threatened" her, like raising his voice when one of his coworkers can't hear him over all the noise on the main floor. So if you've ever been threatened by a crazy client with a knife, held at gunpoint, or followed home by a loony customer, just know that your hardships are nothing compared to Cunterella's. Loud voices on a giant fucking factory floor hurts her feefees.

This might sound like a load of BS, but my SO has brought home multiple trophies, accolades, hand-written letters of thanks from HQ, and gift cards during his time with LessAwful. I never even knew of these acknowledgements and praises unless there were suddenly trophies and letters sitting on the dining table. My SO is a man of few words, he gives people the benefit of the doubt (which has obviously not worked out), and he hates being in the spotlight. He's caught mistakes that have saved the company tens of thousands of dollars multiple times, and he never talks about it. It's Cunterella's job to catch those mistakes, but when she's not doing her job she's off doing who knows what else. Life is a struggle for this woman, and she wants you to know it. She has a cluster of various chronic conditions and allergies... when it's convenient for her. This chaps my ass because one of the conditions she claims to suffer from is one I live with. There's no cure, there's no go-to medicines that are guaranteed to help, and some of those medications are crazy expensive. She set up her office to "help" with triggers of this condition, but no one is going to believe you have an invisible illness when you're office is Yankee Candle Company meets the bedding section of Bed Bad & Beyond. This bitch is lighting candles and taking naps. And those privacy blinds for her sensitive eyes because the lighting on the main work floor is just too bright? My ass.

Speaking of sensitive eyes, her lies range from stupid to hilarious. One week she forgot that she was telling the same lie for 5 days in a row. She told everyone she was leaving early to pick up her glasses. Five times. She does not even wear glasses. Her lies usually involve her supposedly autistic son. I'm guessing he's just socially re.tarded because his mom is a morbidly obese lying clusterfuck of a human. My favorite lie was when she left after 2 hours because she had to, and several workers have quoted, "Go to the school to sign autism papers." She literally said she had to go sign "autism papers" as proof that her son is autistic. How does anyone come up with such a hilarious and terrible lie? She also lies religiously about being allergic to citrus. She chugs some kind of flavored fizzy "diet" water that has citric acid listed as the second ingredient. Fatty isn't allergic to citrus. I probably shouldn't call her Fatty, though. She has lost weight! She's been working from home during the pandemic and runs on the treadmill during her breaks. It's not because she lied to get pills that have the negative side effect of rapid weight loss.

Cunterella is one of those people who paints a different portrait of herself and her life depending on who she is interacting with. Her coworkers get a mix of truths and lies, her personal Facebook page gets all lies, and her private group for selling nail stickers gets the truth. For example, much like Chantal she brags about dumb shit that happened in her teen years and early twenties, like how she fucked her sister's boyfriend and married him. Her sister is a disabled army veteran. At one point her sister was living with her, and Cunterella kicked her out because, "as a babysitter, she has limits." No shit you miserable fatsack, she's disabled from having a bomb blow up underneath her. Cunterella tells these stories to her coworkers as if they're uplifting, hilarious, loving, and normal. But on her Facebook page, she spams those painfully generic images littered with neon pink hearts and sparkles that talk about love, acceptance, forgiveness, and don't forget that she loves her sister dearly, and that she's so sorry she isn't living with them anymore, and that she'll do anything for her cherished ones.

So, you may be wondering why she's trying to get my SO fired if my SO has been the one saving LessAwful nearly 100k in less than a year? We have no idea. My best guess is that she's afraid he'll reveal her for being a crazy lying bitch. And yes, he is trying to do that now, but only because she tried to fire him multiple times over literally nothing. My question is why corporate doesn't care more. Some employees are guessing that she's told different lies about her totally not fake health conditions that have them scared to fire her, and at the worst they'll ship her off to another location. I don't have faith worth a damn in corporations, I've worked for plenty and had my soul sucked dry, but this bitch has literally spent months of her life showing up to work just to try and get my SO fried. She's trying so hard to collect dirt on him, privately interviewing the other employees about him, handing out notes asking if he's done anything like sexually harass the female employees, and other juvenile re.tarded nonsense. It seems like someone at HQ would eventually snap after getting dozens of phone calls a day from this whiny fatass who has no proof of her claims and, oh, yeah, never does her job.

Night shift and day shift have now banned together to to try and get her fired. 4 or 5 people are monitoring her social media activity and screencapping and archiving everything, 2 months ago one person started writing down what time she would leave and her excuses, and as I said at the beginning everyone is coopering with the ethics group. It must be nice for Cunterella to "work" from home during the pandemic while the employees who do the actual work still have go to to their 12 hour shifts. Now she doesn't have to fry her tiny pea brain thinking of excuses to leave early!
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how did someone as utterly useless as her even get hired at a factory in the first place?
that smacks of serious overstaffing, and/or complete incompetence in the management

cryptidfuck said:
The only game I can think of that has cards like that is LightSeekers, and I'm pretty sure you can buy individual cards for cheap on ebay, it's a scam to buy blind packs like that. I'm on the spectrum too but come on, trading cards? Are you fucking kidding me?
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apparently the game in question was Animal Crossing: New Horizons (released March 20th) and the cards in question were Amiibo cards
so there you go
 
This has been on mind since I learned more about this disgusting person recently. I'll call this person B.

Years back, my friend P worked as a caregiver for this disabled lady M. M lived with her husband B. B was a tall fat man with a prominent big nose and beady eyes framed by glasses. At first, everything was ok. P got along with M, but later P starts noticing some things.

Firstly, how controlling B was with his wife. Then how lazy B was. P is supposed to care only for M, but they expected her to also help B because he was a lazy ass. P puts up with it for a while because she needs a paycheck.

One day when she's leaving work, there's a paper on her windshield. The paper basically showed that B was a sex offender with the case and everything. The following day, she runs into a neighbor of theirs and he was the one who stuck that paper on her windshield and tells her to be careful.

A couple of weeks pass and P hurts herself on the job. P tells me how fucking weird it was that B kept insisting she give him her house keys so he could go wake up her children. Of course, P said no. More time passes and P finally quits.

He was a fucking weird old man. One time he told P he used to watch porn before he became a Christian lol.

And now the recent stuff, I went on Facebook and I stumbled onto B's page. His icon was him all trooned out. Just imagine a wrinkly pig in lipstick and a wig.
 
More from my sister, the lolcow:

She claims that she has 'the gift' and can see people's futures and speak with the dead. Nothing like getting a phone call in the middle of making the kids breakfast, having her warning me that grandma told her to stop my husband from going to work today. Speaking of kids, I guess I am effectively immortal since she predicted I would die from complications having my sixth child, and there's no way I am having six fucking kids. She is constantly changing churches because she can't keep her mouth shut, and as soon as she starts telling people about her mystic power bullshit, they either consider her loony or messing with witchcraft.

This would just be an eccentricity if she also wasn't blatantly self-serving with it. Just before our dad died, they had an argument. Two weeks after the funeral, she called my mom up and told her dad spoke to her and told her he was sorry, and he now understood she was right. After mom passed away, she informed me that, despite what the will said, our parents wanted her to have the camper trailer. What gets me is I don't even like camping or fishing, and she knows this. Had she just asked me for it since she would get more use out of it, I would have given it to her. Instead, she went all Miss Cleo on me, and so I told her to fuck off.
 
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